Over [One-shot]
Title: Over
Pairing: Juntoshi (broken)/Yama
Genre: Angst, Drama, Romance
Rating: PG-13
Prompt by: aka_caster (Sorry for taking so long!)
Summary: Jun has been taking Ohno for granted, and Ohno has had enough.
Disclaimer: I only own the story!
A.N: Made this for Mbak Mel's request! I hope you'll like it! Comments will be loved!
Ohno woke up in a foreign place, and right away, he thought, I’ve made a mistake.
The realization burned on his mind, down to his heart, clutching painfully and making it harder to breathe. He stared at the white ceiling; the same white ceiling, yet so different from the place where he should be. He pushed himself up, and his body whimpered in protest; he was sore, tired, and all his muscles felt like they’ve turned into jelly. Ohno scooted over to the headboard, and then he leaned against it, using only the white blanket to cover his stark naked body.
He wanted to pretend like he didn’t know what had happened, but he knew.
He was drunk last night, but not enough to get a hangover and forgetting what had took place last night. Someone was with him, whispering words of comfort to his ears, whispering the words that Ohno had wanted to hear the most. Ohno let that person hugged him, he let that person kissed him, he let that person took him to his place and have sex with him - and he did all those with full awareness. He was willing for it. He didn’t fight back or protest even once - frankly, he had wanted it.
He lifted his left hand, and there, in his finger, a ring band gleamed sullenly.
He just cheated, didn’t he? That was one thing he didn’t want the most. The only thing that he had promised he wouldn’t do. And yet here he was; sitting on someone else’s bed, naked and dirty and was fucked by someone else that wasn’t his husband.
He must be worried. Ohno thought quietly. He must be really worried; I didn’t call him or leaving any messages after all. Thankfully, Ohno found his phone on the nightstand; he needed to thank the other person for being considerate later on, but for now, he was more focused on turning on his phone. He waited with pounding heart as the screen went on, and after that, he unlocked it. He waited some more for his phone to get any signal, and as he did so, he closed his eyes. Wishing. Hoping.
After a while, he opened his eyes, and he stared at his phone.
Nothing.
There were some notifications, some messages, but none came from his husband. He looked at the calls list and also his messages but there weren’t any. Nothing. Not even a ‘where are you’ or ‘why aren’t you home yet?’ or - gosh, at this point he’d even take some scolding gladly, because that would mean he cared, and he wanted his husband to care and look for him.
But there was nothing.
He set his phone aside and, just like that, the sobbing was wrecking his body. He lay back down into the bed, curling himself into a human ball as he cried and cried, wetting the pillow under him. He hugged himself, trying, and desperately failing, to keep himself together. It hurts; so so much, and he let himself being drown in the overwhelming pain. Wave after wave kept on hitting him, and he found himself drowning, drowning; deeper with each sobbing until he couldn’t breathe anymore.
Someone walked into the room, and soon enough, Ohno felt someone climbing on the bed. He was being gathered on someone’s embrace then, and gentle hands ran on his back, trying to soothe him from his pain. He clutched desperately to that person’s t-shirt, burying himself in it as he closed his eyes. “He didn’t care anymore, Sho-chan.” He sobbed pitifully. “He didn’t care anymore.”
Sho shushed him, gentle lips leaving feathery kisses on Ohno’s temple as his embrace tightened around Ohno. “Leave him.” Sho whispered into his ears. “Leave him and come live with me. I’ll love you right, I’ll treat you right.”
If he was being told these two years ago, Ohno would have definitely ran away from Sho’s embrace and left to come back to his husband’s arms, the place where he truly belonged. But this time, he found himself hugging Sho tighter, holding him like he was his anchor that kept him from drowning.
This time, he found himself nodding.
He went home not so long after that then; he showered and had, purposefully, borrowed Sho’s coat as he walked in the winter-coated Tokyo’s street. He took his sweet time on walking, knowing that his husband wasn’t even looking for him, judging by his silent phone. On the coat’s pocket, lay a piece of paper that weight the world for him; that paper was dragging his feet down, kind of, because he may or he may not using this paper - it depends on his husband reaction. If he was still worried over Ohno, then Ohno would definitely tore this paper down.
If he not - Ohno didn’t even want to think about it.
He passed a pretty woman in a thick coat in front of his apartment. The woman was beautiful, with brown long locks falling to her shoulders and big, round eyes; she wore a pretty stylish coat, one that you could easily found in the high-class district, and she looked pretty fresh, like she had just taken a shower too. Ohno smiled faintly at her when their eyes meet, but the woman didn’t even bothered to smile back; she scrunched her nose, like Ohno was a homeless guy or something, and she walked briskly past him without a second glance.
Just when she disappeared inside a cab did Ohno realize that she was a popular model.
The word ‘model’ didn’t sit well in his stomach, because it was what his husband did: modeling. There was a chance that she was there to meet his husband.
There was a chance that she was there to have sex with his husband.
Ohno’s stomach did this funny thing that tricked him into believing that he needed to throw up immediately in the lift; he didn’t though, of course, and somehow he managed to keep himself at bay as he hurried to his apartment. The door was unlocked, and so Ohno immediately went inside, locking the door behind him, and he took off his boots as he finally made his way instead. “Tadaima.”
A grunt answered him, and Ohno kept on walking until he found his husband in the pantry, seemingly trying to finish off a whole mug of coffee. Ohno stood there, watching him and wondering if he would realize that he wasn’t even wearing his own coat. “Tadaima.” He whispered again.
“Where the fuck has you been?” His husband fired at him as he put the mug carelessly into the sink. “Why weren’t you home last night?”
“I was out drinking with my friend.” Ohno mumbled, fingers playing with the edge of Sho’s coat - at least he wasn’t lying, it was half-truth anyway. “Sorry, I forgot to -“
“Well, whatever.” His husband dismissed him, and he walked past him, to their bedroom. “I’ve gotta go. Got a work this afternoon.”
Ohno followed him to their bedroom, and the scene in front of him made him winced.
Their bedroom was a mess; the lamp beside the night stand was knocked off, some books were scattered on the floor, but what was more horrible for Ohno was the fact that their bed was really messy - the blanket was on the floor, the sheets were being pulled off -
And the room stunk of sex and sweat and cigarettes.
Ohno thought back to that girl. “You just had sex with some other model again, didn’t you?”
“Huh? Oh.” His husband rummaged through their closet, and then he pulled out one of his knit-cap collection from the inside. “Well, yeah. It’s nothing new though, isn’t it?”
Ohno’s body trembled. “In our room?”
“You weren’t here.”
“So if I weren’t here, it would be okay to bring another girl to our room and have sex with her?”
His husband shrugged; he put on the knit-cap over his back-styled brown hair, completely ignoring Ohno, and then when he was done he grabbed on his wallet and phone over the nightstand. “Well, I’m going.”
“Did I lack something?” Ohno burst out as he watched his husband leaving the room. “Did I lack something, Jun?”
His husband, Jun, stopped and he leaned against the doorframe as he looked at Ohno with squinted eyes. “We’ve talked about it, Satoshi. It’s not like you’re lacking something. Just, well, I just need to do it, you know. Having sex with those models helps me on my career.”
“But it hurts me.” Ohno said as he felt tears prickling on his eyes. “It hurts to know that you went out of your way and have sex with those girls - would you please make it stop?” Ohno stuffed his head to his pocket, feeling the smooth surface of the paper with his fingers as he tried to stop himself from crying. “If I beg you, would you please stop fucking them?”
Jun stared at him; he looked like he actually did some thinking over Ohno’s question, and it gave him a slight hope, but then Jun shook his head. “I can’t. Sorry, but you just have to deal with it.” And then he turned to leave, and Ohno stared at his retreating back. Out of anger, he walked after him, right when Jun was putting on his boots, and he spat. “I am dealing with it.” He said between gritted teeth. “I have sex with another man last night. I let him touched me, I let him entered me in the way that you usually did, and you know what? It actually felt good.”
Jun was suddenly in front of him, and he smashed their lips together in anger. It hurts, really really hurts and Ohno gasped and he tried to push him away, but Jun was bigger and stronger than him. He took advantage of his opened mouth to slipped his tongue in, tasting everything as if trying to remind Ohno that he was his, and then he pulled away after biting Ohno’s lower lips not so gently, making him writhed in pain. He finally released him then, and Ohno fell to the floor with a bleeding lips and wet eyes as he looked away from Jun; too angry to even form any words. He felt humiliated, and at this very moment, he loathed Jun so very much. “You can deal with it anyway you wanted.” Jun hissed as he wiped his wet lips with the back of his hand. “But you can’t have sex with anyone else.”
“Even though you’re fucking girls in our bed?”
“That’s a whole different matter.” He mumbled. “In any case don’t ever let anyone touched you again. You’re mine.”
After that, Jun left with the slamming of the door, and the room turned completely silent it was almost eerie.
I need to get out of here.
Without thinking about anything else, Ohno quickly scrambled to his feet and marched to their bedroom. He couldn’t stand the way his bedroom looked like now, but he stayed in there long enough to pull out his biggest luggage bag from the closet and then he threw all of his clothes and some shoes into it carelessly. He then moved around, looking for his precious belongings; his sketchbooks, his passport and visa, his assurance card, his savings account, his stamp - he dumped them all into one bag, except the stamp that he was holding tightly on his free hand, and then he finally dragged his bag outside. Once in a living room, he once again stuffed his hand into the pocket and touched the paper, and this time, he pulled it out. He unfolded the paper on top of the coffee table, and he stared at it for a long while, rereading the form that he has filled back then in Sho’s house.
But in the end, he finally pressed his stamp over the paper with tears streaming down his face. Then he pulled off his ring, and he placed them on top of the paper.
It was over now.
Ohno left, closing the door to a place where he used to be happy before slowly behind his back. He made his way downstairs, not bothering to stop his tears, and then he walked out on the now-covered with snow’s street. The air was chilled, and every time he took a breath, a warm puff of air came out. He stared at the sky, at the way the snow was falling into his face, and he wondered if leaving was the right thing to do, or whether he was going to regret it later or not.
But a honk of a car surprised him; he turned his head to see Sho’s car parked not too far from him. Sho opened the window, and he was smiling at Ohno, a gentle and warm smile that saved him, and he said, “Come, Satoshi.”
Ohno knew, then, that he didn’t care if he might make a wrong decision. He walked steadily towards Sho with his luggage heavy behind him - but it was a good weight. Somehow, with every step he took towards Sho, he felt like he was cutting all the pain that bounded him to his husband. He felt relieved, alive, and most importantly, hopeful.
He realized he could breathe again now.
Sho helped him with his luggage, and then they both got into the car and drove away. Ohno looked outside the window, towards the apartment where he has been living for years. It got smaller and smaller until it disappeared completely from his sight. Ohno looked forward then, to the road spread before him, and without him realizing it, his tears fell again.
“Are you okay?” Sho whispered, and to answer his question, Ohno took his free hand, gently squeezing it and found a bit of happiness in the way Sho immediately squeezed back. “I will be.” He whispered softly. “I will be okay.”
Sho nodded, and for the rest of the ride, he didn’t let go of Ohno’s hand even for a moment.
And Ohno needed that. He needed someone that’d treat him right. Someone that’d love him right.
And he believed Sho could give him that.
***
Jun came home late, his mood sour from the argument he was having with his manager, and it turned even sourer as he came back into a dark apartment. He tried calling for Ohno as he walked around the rooms to turn on the lights, but not even once Ohno answered him. He thought that Ohno was still mad at him, or maybe he went out for another round of drink, but then his eyes found something on the coffee table, and he quickly approached it.
What he saw made his face lost it color.
DIVORCE NOTIFICATION.
Ohno has filled the form and stamped it, and lying on top of the paper, was Ohno’s ring.
Jun stared and stared and stared.
This couldn’t be happening.
He grabbed the paper and then he looked around the house, hoping that it was just a joke, a mean joke that Ohno pulled off to get back at him. He checked everywhere, but he didn’t found Ohno; if anything, what he found was a half empty closet, with most of Ohno’s clothes gone. Terrified, Jun then took the lift and ran outside. The snow was falling heavily, and it was unbearably cold, but he didn’t care. He ran, without knowing where to go, and he screamed on top of his lungs. “Satoshi!” He repeated over and over again. “Satoshi!”
But he was nowhere to be found. The street was silent but from his screaming. Everywhere he looked, he saw nothing but white, and soon enough, Jun lost all of his energy and he fell on top of the fluffy bed the snow had provided for him. The cold was seeping to his body, but Jun felt like the core of the cold was coming from inside himself, eating his heart and his mind, and then it moved to eat his whole body too.
I shouldn’t have been taking him for granted, he thought quietly, though in his mind it sounded like the only sound that existed in the whole world. I should’ve treated him right. I should’ve kept him close. I should’ve loved him the way he should be loved. What am I doing? What am I doing exactly?
He lay there, buried by the snow in the middle of nowhere, thinking of the possibility of his Satoshi being loved and loving someone else.
Everything else in front of him turned white.
And he cried.
Pairing: Juntoshi (broken)/Yama
Genre: Angst, Drama, Romance
Rating: PG-13
Prompt by: aka_caster (Sorry for taking so long!)
Summary: Jun has been taking Ohno for granted, and Ohno has had enough.
Disclaimer: I only own the story!
A.N: Made this for Mbak Mel's request! I hope you'll like it! Comments will be loved!
Ohno woke up in a foreign place, and right away, he thought, I’ve made a mistake.
The realization burned on his mind, down to his heart, clutching painfully and making it harder to breathe. He stared at the white ceiling; the same white ceiling, yet so different from the place where he should be. He pushed himself up, and his body whimpered in protest; he was sore, tired, and all his muscles felt like they’ve turned into jelly. Ohno scooted over to the headboard, and then he leaned against it, using only the white blanket to cover his stark naked body.
He wanted to pretend like he didn’t know what had happened, but he knew.
He was drunk last night, but not enough to get a hangover and forgetting what had took place last night. Someone was with him, whispering words of comfort to his ears, whispering the words that Ohno had wanted to hear the most. Ohno let that person hugged him, he let that person kissed him, he let that person took him to his place and have sex with him - and he did all those with full awareness. He was willing for it. He didn’t fight back or protest even once - frankly, he had wanted it.
He lifted his left hand, and there, in his finger, a ring band gleamed sullenly.
He just cheated, didn’t he? That was one thing he didn’t want the most. The only thing that he had promised he wouldn’t do. And yet here he was; sitting on someone else’s bed, naked and dirty and was fucked by someone else that wasn’t his husband.
He must be worried. Ohno thought quietly. He must be really worried; I didn’t call him or leaving any messages after all. Thankfully, Ohno found his phone on the nightstand; he needed to thank the other person for being considerate later on, but for now, he was more focused on turning on his phone. He waited with pounding heart as the screen went on, and after that, he unlocked it. He waited some more for his phone to get any signal, and as he did so, he closed his eyes. Wishing. Hoping.
After a while, he opened his eyes, and he stared at his phone.
Nothing.
There were some notifications, some messages, but none came from his husband. He looked at the calls list and also his messages but there weren’t any. Nothing. Not even a ‘where are you’ or ‘why aren’t you home yet?’ or - gosh, at this point he’d even take some scolding gladly, because that would mean he cared, and he wanted his husband to care and look for him.
But there was nothing.
He set his phone aside and, just like that, the sobbing was wrecking his body. He lay back down into the bed, curling himself into a human ball as he cried and cried, wetting the pillow under him. He hugged himself, trying, and desperately failing, to keep himself together. It hurts; so so much, and he let himself being drown in the overwhelming pain. Wave after wave kept on hitting him, and he found himself drowning, drowning; deeper with each sobbing until he couldn’t breathe anymore.
Someone walked into the room, and soon enough, Ohno felt someone climbing on the bed. He was being gathered on someone’s embrace then, and gentle hands ran on his back, trying to soothe him from his pain. He clutched desperately to that person’s t-shirt, burying himself in it as he closed his eyes. “He didn’t care anymore, Sho-chan.” He sobbed pitifully. “He didn’t care anymore.”
Sho shushed him, gentle lips leaving feathery kisses on Ohno’s temple as his embrace tightened around Ohno. “Leave him.” Sho whispered into his ears. “Leave him and come live with me. I’ll love you right, I’ll treat you right.”
If he was being told these two years ago, Ohno would have definitely ran away from Sho’s embrace and left to come back to his husband’s arms, the place where he truly belonged. But this time, he found himself hugging Sho tighter, holding him like he was his anchor that kept him from drowning.
This time, he found himself nodding.
He went home not so long after that then; he showered and had, purposefully, borrowed Sho’s coat as he walked in the winter-coated Tokyo’s street. He took his sweet time on walking, knowing that his husband wasn’t even looking for him, judging by his silent phone. On the coat’s pocket, lay a piece of paper that weight the world for him; that paper was dragging his feet down, kind of, because he may or he may not using this paper - it depends on his husband reaction. If he was still worried over Ohno, then Ohno would definitely tore this paper down.
If he not - Ohno didn’t even want to think about it.
He passed a pretty woman in a thick coat in front of his apartment. The woman was beautiful, with brown long locks falling to her shoulders and big, round eyes; she wore a pretty stylish coat, one that you could easily found in the high-class district, and she looked pretty fresh, like she had just taken a shower too. Ohno smiled faintly at her when their eyes meet, but the woman didn’t even bothered to smile back; she scrunched her nose, like Ohno was a homeless guy or something, and she walked briskly past him without a second glance.
Just when she disappeared inside a cab did Ohno realize that she was a popular model.
The word ‘model’ didn’t sit well in his stomach, because it was what his husband did: modeling. There was a chance that she was there to meet his husband.
There was a chance that she was there to have sex with his husband.
Ohno’s stomach did this funny thing that tricked him into believing that he needed to throw up immediately in the lift; he didn’t though, of course, and somehow he managed to keep himself at bay as he hurried to his apartment. The door was unlocked, and so Ohno immediately went inside, locking the door behind him, and he took off his boots as he finally made his way instead. “Tadaima.”
A grunt answered him, and Ohno kept on walking until he found his husband in the pantry, seemingly trying to finish off a whole mug of coffee. Ohno stood there, watching him and wondering if he would realize that he wasn’t even wearing his own coat. “Tadaima.” He whispered again.
“Where the fuck has you been?” His husband fired at him as he put the mug carelessly into the sink. “Why weren’t you home last night?”
“I was out drinking with my friend.” Ohno mumbled, fingers playing with the edge of Sho’s coat - at least he wasn’t lying, it was half-truth anyway. “Sorry, I forgot to -“
“Well, whatever.” His husband dismissed him, and he walked past him, to their bedroom. “I’ve gotta go. Got a work this afternoon.”
Ohno followed him to their bedroom, and the scene in front of him made him winced.
Their bedroom was a mess; the lamp beside the night stand was knocked off, some books were scattered on the floor, but what was more horrible for Ohno was the fact that their bed was really messy - the blanket was on the floor, the sheets were being pulled off -
And the room stunk of sex and sweat and cigarettes.
Ohno thought back to that girl. “You just had sex with some other model again, didn’t you?”
“Huh? Oh.” His husband rummaged through their closet, and then he pulled out one of his knit-cap collection from the inside. “Well, yeah. It’s nothing new though, isn’t it?”
Ohno’s body trembled. “In our room?”
“You weren’t here.”
“So if I weren’t here, it would be okay to bring another girl to our room and have sex with her?”
His husband shrugged; he put on the knit-cap over his back-styled brown hair, completely ignoring Ohno, and then when he was done he grabbed on his wallet and phone over the nightstand. “Well, I’m going.”
“Did I lack something?” Ohno burst out as he watched his husband leaving the room. “Did I lack something, Jun?”
His husband, Jun, stopped and he leaned against the doorframe as he looked at Ohno with squinted eyes. “We’ve talked about it, Satoshi. It’s not like you’re lacking something. Just, well, I just need to do it, you know. Having sex with those models helps me on my career.”
“But it hurts me.” Ohno said as he felt tears prickling on his eyes. “It hurts to know that you went out of your way and have sex with those girls - would you please make it stop?” Ohno stuffed his head to his pocket, feeling the smooth surface of the paper with his fingers as he tried to stop himself from crying. “If I beg you, would you please stop fucking them?”
Jun stared at him; he looked like he actually did some thinking over Ohno’s question, and it gave him a slight hope, but then Jun shook his head. “I can’t. Sorry, but you just have to deal with it.” And then he turned to leave, and Ohno stared at his retreating back. Out of anger, he walked after him, right when Jun was putting on his boots, and he spat. “I am dealing with it.” He said between gritted teeth. “I have sex with another man last night. I let him touched me, I let him entered me in the way that you usually did, and you know what? It actually felt good.”
Jun was suddenly in front of him, and he smashed their lips together in anger. It hurts, really really hurts and Ohno gasped and he tried to push him away, but Jun was bigger and stronger than him. He took advantage of his opened mouth to slipped his tongue in, tasting everything as if trying to remind Ohno that he was his, and then he pulled away after biting Ohno’s lower lips not so gently, making him writhed in pain. He finally released him then, and Ohno fell to the floor with a bleeding lips and wet eyes as he looked away from Jun; too angry to even form any words. He felt humiliated, and at this very moment, he loathed Jun so very much. “You can deal with it anyway you wanted.” Jun hissed as he wiped his wet lips with the back of his hand. “But you can’t have sex with anyone else.”
“Even though you’re fucking girls in our bed?”
“That’s a whole different matter.” He mumbled. “In any case don’t ever let anyone touched you again. You’re mine.”
After that, Jun left with the slamming of the door, and the room turned completely silent it was almost eerie.
I need to get out of here.
Without thinking about anything else, Ohno quickly scrambled to his feet and marched to their bedroom. He couldn’t stand the way his bedroom looked like now, but he stayed in there long enough to pull out his biggest luggage bag from the closet and then he threw all of his clothes and some shoes into it carelessly. He then moved around, looking for his precious belongings; his sketchbooks, his passport and visa, his assurance card, his savings account, his stamp - he dumped them all into one bag, except the stamp that he was holding tightly on his free hand, and then he finally dragged his bag outside. Once in a living room, he once again stuffed his hand into the pocket and touched the paper, and this time, he pulled it out. He unfolded the paper on top of the coffee table, and he stared at it for a long while, rereading the form that he has filled back then in Sho’s house.
But in the end, he finally pressed his stamp over the paper with tears streaming down his face. Then he pulled off his ring, and he placed them on top of the paper.
It was over now.
Ohno left, closing the door to a place where he used to be happy before slowly behind his back. He made his way downstairs, not bothering to stop his tears, and then he walked out on the now-covered with snow’s street. The air was chilled, and every time he took a breath, a warm puff of air came out. He stared at the sky, at the way the snow was falling into his face, and he wondered if leaving was the right thing to do, or whether he was going to regret it later or not.
But a honk of a car surprised him; he turned his head to see Sho’s car parked not too far from him. Sho opened the window, and he was smiling at Ohno, a gentle and warm smile that saved him, and he said, “Come, Satoshi.”
Ohno knew, then, that he didn’t care if he might make a wrong decision. He walked steadily towards Sho with his luggage heavy behind him - but it was a good weight. Somehow, with every step he took towards Sho, he felt like he was cutting all the pain that bounded him to his husband. He felt relieved, alive, and most importantly, hopeful.
He realized he could breathe again now.
Sho helped him with his luggage, and then they both got into the car and drove away. Ohno looked outside the window, towards the apartment where he has been living for years. It got smaller and smaller until it disappeared completely from his sight. Ohno looked forward then, to the road spread before him, and without him realizing it, his tears fell again.
“Are you okay?” Sho whispered, and to answer his question, Ohno took his free hand, gently squeezing it and found a bit of happiness in the way Sho immediately squeezed back. “I will be.” He whispered softly. “I will be okay.”
Sho nodded, and for the rest of the ride, he didn’t let go of Ohno’s hand even for a moment.
And Ohno needed that. He needed someone that’d treat him right. Someone that’d love him right.
And he believed Sho could give him that.
***
Jun came home late, his mood sour from the argument he was having with his manager, and it turned even sourer as he came back into a dark apartment. He tried calling for Ohno as he walked around the rooms to turn on the lights, but not even once Ohno answered him. He thought that Ohno was still mad at him, or maybe he went out for another round of drink, but then his eyes found something on the coffee table, and he quickly approached it.
What he saw made his face lost it color.
DIVORCE NOTIFICATION.
Ohno has filled the form and stamped it, and lying on top of the paper, was Ohno’s ring.
Jun stared and stared and stared.
This couldn’t be happening.
He grabbed the paper and then he looked around the house, hoping that it was just a joke, a mean joke that Ohno pulled off to get back at him. He checked everywhere, but he didn’t found Ohno; if anything, what he found was a half empty closet, with most of Ohno’s clothes gone. Terrified, Jun then took the lift and ran outside. The snow was falling heavily, and it was unbearably cold, but he didn’t care. He ran, without knowing where to go, and he screamed on top of his lungs. “Satoshi!” He repeated over and over again. “Satoshi!”
But he was nowhere to be found. The street was silent but from his screaming. Everywhere he looked, he saw nothing but white, and soon enough, Jun lost all of his energy and he fell on top of the fluffy bed the snow had provided for him. The cold was seeping to his body, but Jun felt like the core of the cold was coming from inside himself, eating his heart and his mind, and then it moved to eat his whole body too.
I shouldn’t have been taking him for granted, he thought quietly, though in his mind it sounded like the only sound that existed in the whole world. I should’ve treated him right. I should’ve kept him close. I should’ve loved him the way he should be loved. What am I doing? What am I doing exactly?
He lay there, buried by the snow in the middle of nowhere, thinking of the possibility of his Satoshi being loved and loving someone else.
Everything else in front of him turned white.
And he cried.