(no subject)
While there are no pictures or extensive descriptions of roaches or roach-like creatures, there is discussion about roaches. If you feel this will be too much for you, please do not continue. If you are going to defend roaches, know that the only roach I have any tolerance for is the one in WALL-E. Non-Pixar roaches can all die and burn in hell.
I hate roaches. I hate things that look like roaches. I cannot handle looking at pictures of video of roaches. Prior to this past weekend I had seen exactly 5 roaches in person in my life. In chronological order:
#1-Next to the sink in the basement bathroom of the dining hall at the summer camp I went to at Yale. I was terrified.
#2-On the street in Manhattan. I ignored it, someone else I was with stomped on it.
#3-In the dining hall at Stony Brook University. I was troubled.
#4-In the bathroom of a hotel where I was visiting a friend. I asked her to kill it but it got away. I managed to sleep in the hotel room, despite being terrified.
#5-On my bedroom wall, right above my fucking bed, at my Mom's, and believe me, I thoroughly flipped my shit. I hit it with something (don't remember what) which killed it, put it in a glass jar, and would not go back in my room for hours. I don't remember if I actually slept there that night or on the couch downstairs.
Palmetto bugs are like roaches except they are attracted to the light and have that whole flying thing down. This seems unfair. If you have the light on, they come to you. If you have the light off, they are lurking in the darkness and could be mere inches away from your head and you would have no idea. This is a lose-lose situation.
There are a lot of palmetto bugs in Florida, I hear. I left Florida when I was very young so I have no idea if I ever saw any while I lived there. There are, apparently, palmetto bugs in California. I was helping Sherrila do some yard work, and the doors were left open for many hours. That night, we were watching Ugly Betty, I turned my head and I saw what I thought was a roach on the wall. I cried out, Sherrila was brave and rescued me from it by swatting it into a paper bag which she took outside. Later the cat was chastised for not killing and eating it the moment it came into the house. After some Googling she determined that it was in the roach family (I am sure there is a more scientific, accurate way of putting this, but there is no way I am going to do a search for anything roach-related) but not a roach, most likely a palmetto bug. I calmed down after it was disposed of, and was fine sleeping in the same room later that night.
The next night Sherrila and I were taking a walk with her friend Dan. I saw a roach on the sidewalk, which I thought was kind of odd. And then it happened again. And again. And again. And-you get the idea. We took the same route walking back so I don't know how many of the roaches were repeats. At one point I saw a cluster of 3 or 4. If every roach on the walk was a distinct, individual roach, I saw at least a dozen.
They were just kind of hanging out. There wasn't any garbage around, there didn't seem to be anything attracting them. In Manhattan when I saw the roach on the sidewalk it made sense because the area was filthy. This area seemed pretty clean. Sherrila hypothesized that someone was doing major construction nearby, forcing the roaches to leave their homes. Dan suggested it was from people over-watering their lawns (we passed a few sprinklers that were on clearly unnecessarily). I have no idea.
I didn't even tense after seeing like the 7th one, though. I'm not going to say I'm comfortable with roaches after this. I still have a deep-seated hatred. But now I feel like they're an enemy I can deal with.
I hate roaches. I hate things that look like roaches. I cannot handle looking at pictures of video of roaches. Prior to this past weekend I had seen exactly 5 roaches in person in my life. In chronological order:
#1-Next to the sink in the basement bathroom of the dining hall at the summer camp I went to at Yale. I was terrified.
#2-On the street in Manhattan. I ignored it, someone else I was with stomped on it.
#3-In the dining hall at Stony Brook University. I was troubled.
#4-In the bathroom of a hotel where I was visiting a friend. I asked her to kill it but it got away. I managed to sleep in the hotel room, despite being terrified.
#5-On my bedroom wall, right above my fucking bed, at my Mom's, and believe me, I thoroughly flipped my shit. I hit it with something (don't remember what) which killed it, put it in a glass jar, and would not go back in my room for hours. I don't remember if I actually slept there that night or on the couch downstairs.
Palmetto bugs are like roaches except they are attracted to the light and have that whole flying thing down. This seems unfair. If you have the light on, they come to you. If you have the light off, they are lurking in the darkness and could be mere inches away from your head and you would have no idea. This is a lose-lose situation.
There are a lot of palmetto bugs in Florida, I hear. I left Florida when I was very young so I have no idea if I ever saw any while I lived there. There are, apparently, palmetto bugs in California. I was helping Sherrila do some yard work, and the doors were left open for many hours. That night, we were watching Ugly Betty, I turned my head and I saw what I thought was a roach on the wall. I cried out, Sherrila was brave and rescued me from it by swatting it into a paper bag which she took outside. Later the cat was chastised for not killing and eating it the moment it came into the house. After some Googling she determined that it was in the roach family (I am sure there is a more scientific, accurate way of putting this, but there is no way I am going to do a search for anything roach-related) but not a roach, most likely a palmetto bug. I calmed down after it was disposed of, and was fine sleeping in the same room later that night.
The next night Sherrila and I were taking a walk with her friend Dan. I saw a roach on the sidewalk, which I thought was kind of odd. And then it happened again. And again. And again. And-you get the idea. We took the same route walking back so I don't know how many of the roaches were repeats. At one point I saw a cluster of 3 or 4. If every roach on the walk was a distinct, individual roach, I saw at least a dozen.
They were just kind of hanging out. There wasn't any garbage around, there didn't seem to be anything attracting them. In Manhattan when I saw the roach on the sidewalk it made sense because the area was filthy. This area seemed pretty clean. Sherrila hypothesized that someone was doing major construction nearby, forcing the roaches to leave their homes. Dan suggested it was from people over-watering their lawns (we passed a few sprinklers that were on clearly unnecessarily). I have no idea.
I didn't even tense after seeing like the 7th one, though. I'm not going to say I'm comfortable with roaches after this. I still have a deep-seated hatred. But now I feel like they're an enemy I can deal with.