To the men who have had sex with me...or might in the future...
Man if i only had this for my last boyfriend.
got this from http://badmojo.vox.com
Girls...read it and love it
Guys...read it and learn!
1.) This may come as a shock, but all girls do not like oral ALL THE TIME. Sometimes, if I'm wet from you already turning me on in a million ways, I don't want to deal with you down there shaking your head like a wet dog and riding out the hormone fest till it is all but invisible. If you have done everything right, and you probably have if I'm naked, then slip a finger down there, stroke the right spots for a minute, then put yourself in me. Sometimes, I just want to be filled up. Don't beat around the bush so to speak.
2.) I'm not a prissy girl. I'm not a prude. But please don't assume I like you licking, rubbing, poking at, or investigating in any way, my ass hole. Honestly, there is nothing LESS sexy to me than anal sex. Have I participated it it before? With the assistance of my trusty friend Bacardi 151...yes. Did I enjoy it? From what I can remember , no. Would I endure it again...probably....but not if I just met you or am not in love with you. Don't bother asking. Or "accidentally" doing anything with that hole unless I have given you a million watt green light.
3.) I'm not glass...so please...don't think I have a desire to be coddled and delicately touched. Tenderness is great. I love it. It's awesome to start kissing sowly and being sweet and gentle. If we get going though...and i'm grabbing at your belt and kissing you harder...grinding harder...feel free to get in on the more agressive action. Pull my hair, dig your fingers into my sides and ass, bite my lip, my nipples, do something exciting! Don't just kiss me like I'm a little girl. Sheesh. Don't give me all that "I don't want to hurt you" crap. You won't hurt me. And if you are so concerned about pain, bring it up when trying to engage in Number 2 (above). Talk about pain. Ugh.
4.) When it comes to me giving oral, I'm all about it. But DO NOT, under any circumstances, push my head down to your crotch. Unless you see me in a lycra skirt and 6 in acrylic shoes, don't assume I'm your slut. I'll go down there at my own pace, and believe me, it will be worth the wait. On the same topic, I'm not squemish about swallowing, but give me a little fucking warning. You don't have to sound an alarm or anything flashy, but give me a sign that I'm about to have one of the most vile tasting things EVER pulsed into my mouth. Just a courtsey. Last thing about this, and not to sound like a needy bitch, but if you liked it, let me know. I don't think I'm alone when I say that we all like to know we are doing a good job. You guys can come from just about anything, so that alone isn't reassuring that I just gave you the best head of your life. And even if I didn't, if you want more of it, you damn well better lie and tell me it was the best. :)
5.) Puh-lease do not kiss my feet or suck my toes. That is just gross on so many levels. I don't think I need to go into that.
6.) When I am on top, please be kind enough to suck my nipples. When you are on top, I try to keep you going through a number of different skills (i.e. neck kissing/biting/sucking, ear nibbling, ass grabbing, ect) so I would apprecieate if you didn't just lie there with your hands behind your head watching me ride you. Be attentive and realize that, although you may have an amazing penis, it doesn't come equipped with attachments to stimulate my nipples, kiss me, and grab my ass while I ride you. You must do something. Sorry. But do it.
7.) Do not shave your entire body. This may turn some girls on, and if you are a body builder, I understand the need for hairlessness. But come on. I do not want to be with a guy who has smoother legs than me. I thank you for keeping the pubes trimmed, and shaved completely there isn't such a bad thing, but armpits, arms, chest and leg hair should be standard on any non-hunky-bodybuilder that I am with. You are a man. You are supposed to be manly. Jeeze.
8.) Do not ask me to call you Daddy.
9.) If you have the chance, brush your teeth before you get going with me. I will do the same. If we had dinner..and it was loaded with garlic and onions, don't assume I will be horny enough to ignore the smell. I like kissing. A lot. I don't want to be more focused on not suffocating that having an orgasm. At the very least, bring some gum.
http://badmojo.vox.com
got this from http://badmojo.vox.com
Girls...read it and love it
Guys...read it and learn!
1.) This may come as a shock, but all girls do not like oral ALL THE TIME. Sometimes, if I'm wet from you already turning me on in a million ways, I don't want to deal with you down there shaking your head like a wet dog and riding out the hormone fest till it is all but invisible. If you have done everything right, and you probably have if I'm naked, then slip a finger down there, stroke the right spots for a minute, then put yourself in me. Sometimes, I just want to be filled up. Don't beat around the bush so to speak.
2.) I'm not a prissy girl. I'm not a prude. But please don't assume I like you licking, rubbing, poking at, or investigating in any way, my ass hole. Honestly, there is nothing LESS sexy to me than anal sex. Have I participated it it before? With the assistance of my trusty friend Bacardi 151...yes. Did I enjoy it? From what I can remember , no. Would I endure it again...probably....but not if I just met you or am not in love with you. Don't bother asking. Or "accidentally" doing anything with that hole unless I have given you a million watt green light.
3.) I'm not glass...so please...don't think I have a desire to be coddled and delicately touched. Tenderness is great. I love it. It's awesome to start kissing sowly and being sweet and gentle. If we get going though...and i'm grabbing at your belt and kissing you harder...grinding harder...feel free to get in on the more agressive action. Pull my hair, dig your fingers into my sides and ass, bite my lip, my nipples, do something exciting! Don't just kiss me like I'm a little girl. Sheesh. Don't give me all that "I don't want to hurt you" crap. You won't hurt me. And if you are so concerned about pain, bring it up when trying to engage in Number 2 (above). Talk about pain. Ugh.
4.) When it comes to me giving oral, I'm all about it. But DO NOT, under any circumstances, push my head down to your crotch. Unless you see me in a lycra skirt and 6 in acrylic shoes, don't assume I'm your slut. I'll go down there at my own pace, and believe me, it will be worth the wait. On the same topic, I'm not squemish about swallowing, but give me a little fucking warning. You don't have to sound an alarm or anything flashy, but give me a sign that I'm about to have one of the most vile tasting things EVER pulsed into my mouth. Just a courtsey. Last thing about this, and not to sound like a needy bitch, but if you liked it, let me know. I don't think I'm alone when I say that we all like to know we are doing a good job. You guys can come from just about anything, so that alone isn't reassuring that I just gave you the best head of your life. And even if I didn't, if you want more of it, you damn well better lie and tell me it was the best. :)
5.) Puh-lease do not kiss my feet or suck my toes. That is just gross on so many levels. I don't think I need to go into that.
6.) When I am on top, please be kind enough to suck my nipples. When you are on top, I try to keep you going through a number of different skills (i.e. neck kissing/biting/sucking, ear nibbling, ass grabbing, ect) so I would apprecieate if you didn't just lie there with your hands behind your head watching me ride you. Be attentive and realize that, although you may have an amazing penis, it doesn't come equipped with attachments to stimulate my nipples, kiss me, and grab my ass while I ride you. You must do something. Sorry. But do it.
7.) Do not shave your entire body. This may turn some girls on, and if you are a body builder, I understand the need for hairlessness. But come on. I do not want to be with a guy who has smoother legs than me. I thank you for keeping the pubes trimmed, and shaved completely there isn't such a bad thing, but armpits, arms, chest and leg hair should be standard on any non-hunky-bodybuilder that I am with. You are a man. You are supposed to be manly. Jeeze.
8.) Do not ask me to call you Daddy.
9.) If you have the chance, brush your teeth before you get going with me. I will do the same. If we had dinner..and it was loaded with garlic and onions, don't assume I will be horny enough to ignore the smell. I like kissing. A lot. I don't want to be more focused on not suffocating that having an orgasm. At the very least, bring some gum.
http://badmojo.vox.com