Chapter Eight
I decided to cut this chapter off here. It got long... and I don't think the writing is particularly good in comparison to other chapters, but I was eager to get it done with. So there. :-P
Once again, I finished it without proof reading...so expect edits later!
Chapter Eight:
"I would say that jumping him wasn't the most tactful of solutions," Hide drawled the next morning, arms folded.
Imai didn't reply. He stared at the ugly upholstery of the furniture in Toll's hotel room, still pouting over the impromptu "group meeting" that had been called. They'd actually forced him out of bed and dragged him in here. And for what? So Hide could accuse him of being an ass while not actually saying he was an ass?
The other two hadn't even said a word besides "get up Imai" and "good morning." They sat on the bed, smoking. U-ta was jittery, losing ash all over the bed, while Toll was calm and serene, as if this was no big deal. But that was how they both handled things--flustered versus suave.
Apparently they both handled things better than Imai, who fucked up all the time.
Damn it, Hide was just watching him, waiting for Imai to speak. Imai cleared his throat--the cough sounded pitiful. But he had dehydration as an excuse. "Well, he was being so quiet and bitchy for the past few days…" he trailed off, thinking that was enough.
It wasn't. "And?"
Imai finally gave up on staring a whole through the furniture and looked up at Hide. The other man gazed back levelly. He was going to make him say it.
There had to be ways out of it, Imai knew that…but they were only temporary outs. Hide would get him in the end.
"And….I was worried about him."
Toll made a satisfied sound behind him and Imai turned to glare. Toll just grinned back at him smoothly. Damn it, they all knew each other too well.
Imai turned around in his chair, looking at each of his band members in turn--well, minus Atsushi that is, who was still locked up in his room. "What am I under arrest here or something? You guys are just as fuckin' crazy than any cops who've questioned me."
U-ta actually laughed. It was a snorted laugh, but it still counted. He tried hard to cover it up but failed.
"Yeah, arrests are hilarious U-ta." Imai took this as his time to drawl.
U-ta coughed into his fist. "No, they aren't. You are though."
Imai glowered.
"All right, now that U-ta got his laughter out for the meeting…" Hide commented, stopping anything Imai could have said in reply. "Let's carry on."
"Well, I for one think that we really shouldn't be discussing Imai's actions. We should focus on Atsushi," Toll spoke up. Imai was just about to turn around and thank him for the support when he continued. "Because Imai just acted like an idiot like he normally does."
"Hey! Hey! I did not act like an--" Imai cut himself off. Okay, so rolling around on the floor covered in beer was a bit idiotic…but they'd all done stupid stuff drunk before!
Okay, maybe not at the first after party…where there were strangers…who could tell stories. And, well, shit.
"Okay, maybe I did." Imai admitted.
"See, he admits it. So let's leave it be," Toll stated, jerking his cigarette in Imai's general direction.
Imai reached up and tried to steal it. "Give me one of those."
"You don't like this kind," Toll commented while fishing amongst the still rumbled bedding for his pack.
"I don't give a fuck. I left mine in my room."
"Well, something is obviously bothering Acchan," U-ta remarked while Imai and Toll got the cigarette situation settled.
"When isn't there something bothering him?" Imai grumbled around this stick of tobacco in his mouth.
"Okay, something worse than usual is bothering him."
Silence fell after U-ta statement. All four stared at each other.
Toll coughed. "Did anyone ask him?"
The silence was now a tad sheepish. U-ta shifted restlessly while Hide rubbed the back of his neck.
"Err…I kinda did…" Imai admitted, raising his hand a little.
"No wonder he's pissed off then…" Hide mumbled. Imai hurled Toll's nearby cigarette pack at Hide's head. Toll's indignant shout was enough warning for Hide to dodge. "You know you're not the most delicate person, Imai," Hide continued, as if he hadn't just had a projectile chucked in his direction.
"Well, it's not like Atsushi's a little whiny girl! He doesn't need kids' gloves!"
Silence again. U-ta coughed into his fist.
"He doesn't!" Imai insisted. He wasn't sure why he was standing up for Atsushi. The man had been nothing but a cranky bastard to him for the past week or so. But Atsushi had been through so much in the past few years, and to have his own friends think he couldn't make it…seemed somewhat defeatist. Or something.
Damn it. It just seemed wrong.
Imai tried to say as much. Of course it didn't come out like his brain insisted it should. "Give the guy some credit--he's been through a lot of crap recently and us talking about him like he's mentally unstable isn't helping!"
"We're not saying that!" Hide insisted, looking truly flustered for the first time that morning. He even took a step towards Imai, but that was as far as he went. He folded his arms over his chest, hands in tight fists. "We're just saying that you have to treat certain people certain ways, and sometimes it's just easier for Atsushi and for us to be a bit gentle, all right? I certainly wouldn't want to be on the end of any of your inquisitions anyway, Imai."
"Well, I noticed that Atsushi's been a bit jumpy lately," U-ta interjected, accurately interpreting the "kill-Hide" look on Imai's face. "Remember when he almost brained himself on that light post the other day, Imai?"
"What?" Toll asked, turning wide-eyes on his brother. "When did this happen?"
"Err…I didn't mention it?" U-ta looked around the room at the blank faces. "Right, I didn't, did I?"
That led to U-ta's explanation of the day in question. As he carried out that onerous task, Imai got to thinking. Okay, Atsushi's condition… One, he seemed jumpy like U-ta said. About when did that start? That afternoon… so, what could have happened between the day before and that afternoon…?
Ah, the blank spot in Imai's memory. That nagging black out….
"That's it!" Imai leapt to his feet, fist in the air. He had the insane urge to pose like an anime character, but refrained at the last second. "I'll ask him about that night!"
His triumph was met by three blank stares. "What, Imai?" Toll asked.
Imai didn't let their incomprehension bother him. "I got the answer! I'll just ask him what happened the night he dragged me home--"
"I think you have to be more specific than that…"
Imai shot U-ta a Look. "The one before the afternoon you just explained, remember? You found him in my room that morning?"
"What? Since when--"
Imai glared at Hide to shut him up. "I don't know why he was still there in the morning. Doesn't really matter. " He ignored Hide's raised eyebrow. "Do you guys remember anything strange happening that night?"
Glances were shared around the room.
"I took a shower and then went straight to bed. I didn't hear anything," Hide said.
Toll just shrugged. "I'm all the way down the hall. I didn't see or hear anything."
"I heard the two of you talking a little bit, but then I fell asleep. I do think I woke up once or twice to your hysterical laughter though, Imai… What was so funny?" U-ta asked.
Imai frowned, trying to remember. "Something….about…euh… I haven't the faintest idea." He actually rubbed at his head, trying to remember. "I…just can't remember."
"You blacked out? I didn't think you had that much to drink…" Toll murmured, idly playing with some of his hair as he thought. "We only went to that one bar afterwards, and we all went home together, so you didn't stay out drinking all night…So your memory shouldn’t be that shot…"
Imai nodded absently, still digging through his memory. Toll was absolutely right. He'd been more wasted than that before--he should remember! "Okay….I remember voices…Atsushi must have turned the TV on or something. They were all business, like newscasters or something…. But then I kinda remember….oh, fuck." Imai rubbed his head harder, using both hands this time.
Someone snatched the still smoking cigarette from his clutches. He looked up and saw Toll stubbing it out. "Before you catch your hair on fire," the other man commented quietly.
Imai thanked him with a nod and turned around. He almost jumped clear out of his seat when he saw that Hide had sat down in the chair right across from him. "Prowl much?" he sniped.
Hide's lips pulled crookedly to the side in a semi-amused grin. "No, not usually." He learned forward slightly, gazing up at Imai calmly. "Don't try to think so hard. It's only bound to make it more difficult to remember."
"But I have to try…I've been letting it slide and nothing's come to me yet…"
"Well, maybe you're right though… Maybe if you talk to Atsushi about it--rationally--you'll begin to remember more?"
"Well…I don't know what he can really tell me about the news on TV…. I don't think anything disastrous happened recently on the news… Unless we watched something else? But the TV shouldn't be a problem…"
"Then it's something else."
"But what?" Imai didn't want to bring up the suggestion that he might have done something idiotic…disastrous even… on that night. Neither did Hide apparently, if his hesitant face meant anything…
"Well, Atsushi was really friendly the next day, so I don't think it's anything you did Imai," U-ta piped up, once again accurately reading the moment.
Imai sighed. "Maybe nothing happened that night after all?" He stared down at his hands. He idly began picking at his pant legs. "Maybe something happened that morning? But what…"
"We did go to Tsukino-san's shop…but that was after Atsushi tripped…or whatever he did," U-ta said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "Maybe the light post was just an accident and something happened at Tsukino's?"
"That place? What could have happened there? It's just a bunch of junk…" But, then again, Atsushi had been rather eager to leave…a bit too eager. And there was that weird book…
Imai attention was suddenly caught up by a loud bang outside the door. Everyone in the room heard it and turned towards the door, startled.
Toll was the first one up and opening the door. The others followed him to crowd the doorframe.
Two roadies were picking up a spilled suitcase while Chiba stood there looking stricken. "I can't believe you dropped it!"
"I'm sorry!" One of the roadies mumbled. "I didn't think it would be so heavy…"
"Just put it all back in--I'll have to apologize for the disarray, but I think Sakurai-san will understand."
It struck Imai right away. "Atsushi's leaving?"
All eyes in the hall and hotel room swerved to Imai in various states of shock.
"Ah…Good morning!" Chiba commented, getting his composure quicker than anyone else. He sent the nearest roadie a glance that had them both scurrying to finish re-packing Atsushi's bag. They started off down the hall as Chiba walked towards the band members.
"Is there a party going on I don't know about?" he asked with false gaiety.
"Is it true?" U-ta asked, clinging to the doorframe, head poking out underneath Toll's arm on the door. His serious face was at sharp contrast to his comical position.
"Hmm?" Chiba hummed in response, tilting his head to the side as if he hadn't heard. Although they all knew that he was faking.
Imai pressed his lips tightly together, hands folded over his chest. He wasn't quite sure what to feel at the moment… but he must have looked angry enough to get Chiba to talk.
"Well… Sakurai-san said he wanted to return home for some rest…seeing as the next show isn't until this weekend…and in Tokyo even! So he'll just meet up with us for rehearsals, he said…" Chiba's only sign of discomfort was the way his thumb scratched at his index finger, but they all knew him well enough by now to pick it up. Or at least Imai did.
"This doesn't bother you?" Hide spoke up from the back of the pile in the doorway. Imai could hear his voice very loud in his ears, but didn't flinch.
Chiba's fingers stopped moving. "No, not at all. It's not as if we all have to stick together. Sakurai-san can take care of himself. "
Uneasiness crept into Imai without warning, clenching a cold fist around his stomach and making his heart pound a little faster. Strange… He wasn't quite sure what had caused it, but he suddenly had the urge to move.
So he did, breaking out of the pack of bodies in the door. That seemed to be the sign for the rest of them to disperse, spilling out into the hall.
"Is he still in his room?" Imai asked Chiba, who looked a bit befuddled.
"No, he went downstairs already."
So that's where Imai went. He wasn't surprised to hear the others follow.
They found Atsushi sitting in one of the lobby chairs when the elevator finally made it downstairs. His normal small travel bag sat in his lap while the suitcase the roadies had been dragging around was most likely outside being pack into the waiting taxi, the hood of which could be seen out the front windows of the hotel. Eyes closed and head resting against the back of the chair, Atsushi could have easily been mistaken for being asleep, but Imai knew better.
Imai stopped as soon as he stepped off the elevator and opened his mouth to speak, but cut off his own voice before any sound emerged. He swallowed. No, he was going to be civil. Hands fisted at his side, he settled for marching across the room and planting himself right next to Atsushi's chair. There were other people in the lobby, but he ignored them. He even ignored his fellow band mates who had stopped a distance away.
"Where are you running off to?"
Okay, so it wasn't exactly civil, but at least he hadn't shouted it across the lobby…
Atsushi stirred, opening his eyes languidly to look up at Imai, who was a bit taken aback by how bloodshot they were. It looked as if he was either hung over or hadn't slept at all. Or perhaps both.
"What do you want Imai?" he asked softly, his voice barely heard over the rattle of a luggage cart through the lobby.
Imai clenched his teeth together. He wasn't sure why he was so agitated all of a sudden--there was a whirlwind of emotions in him that made no sense whatsoever. Outraged, annoyed, amused, hurt, tired, accepting…scared.
All these tumbling emotions accomplished was to make his head hurt and that made him edgy. "Where are you going?"
Atsushi at least had the decency to sit up and look at Imai directly. His face was perfectly blank as he said, "Home. Didn't Chiba-san tell you?"
"Yes. He did."
"Then there--"
The words burst out of Imai before his brain even formed them. "Why didn't you tell m--us?" Behind the wall of his anger, Imai's was surprised at his almost slip. Me.
As if Imai was any different than the rest of the band.
Atsushi looked down at his hands folded in his lap. "I decided this morning."
"And?"
"Well, it wasn't as if any of you were around this morning," Atsushi replied with just a hint of something to his tone. Imai couldn't quite pinpoint what it was--perhaps because he was on his last bit of patience.
"Well, the way you acted last night, it's no wonder--"
Atsushi's head snapped up and he stared at Imai. "Me? The way I acted?" He put his hands down firmly on the armrest, as if he was about to push himself up.
Imai was ready for him--he actually wanted to yell at him. To scream out the building up frustration of not knowing.
Atsushi's posture must have sent up the proverbial red flag though, because soon both U-ta and Hide were there.
"Going home to get some better sleep, eh Acchan?" U-ta asked quickly with a forced smile.
Atsushi just eyed him for a long moment, before losing his grip on the chair arms. He crossed his arms across his chest instead. He titled his head in such a way that his long hair fell a bit over his eye on Imai's side. Tricky bastard.
No one really had a chance to say anything else after that. The very next moment Chiba-san appeared from wherever he'd gone off to and broke into the group around Atsushi. "All's ready to go."
Atsushi stood up, swinging his bag over his shoulder. He didn't even look in Imai's direction. "I'll see you on Friday," he said to the room at large before walking off. Chiba glanced back at the quiet band members, an unsettled look on his face, before following.
There was a moment of stillness, as if time had stopped…but then U-ta jumped forward, almost falling over a chair in his haste. "Bye, Acchan!" he called, waving frantically.
It looked as if Atsushi would just ignore him, but right before he opened the door Atsushi paused …and then turned around to wave back.
This band really relied on cues, Imai realized, because after that moment all of the others called out their farewells. Except for Imai, who remained mute. U-ta grabbed his arm and tried to make him wave, but Imai shrugged him off. Atsushi wasn't even looking at him anyway. So fuck it.
As soon as the doors closed behind that familiar dark-clad back…Imai felt his heart sink. He felt uneasy…but, damn it, once again he didn't know why. He had the insane urge to go outside, jump in the taxi, and follow Atsushi home…but what good would that do? They'd just fight the whole time…
But still, Imai had this sense of dread…
"Fuck it," he hissed, not realizing he'd voiced it aloud until Toll nudged him with his elbow. Imai glared at the older man, but Toll just raised both his eyebrows in mock innocence.
Those damn brothers are both the same, Imai thought miserably…but it was a fond misery. Especially when Toll linked arms with Imai--which was hard to do since Imai's arms were folded over his chest--and then started to steer them all towards the hotel restaurant.
"Standing around in the lobby won't get anything done," Toll announced over Imai's head to the rest of the group. "I suggest we eat. Because, I don't know about you, but I'm damned hungry."
Imai grumbled with all the energy he could muster--which was a lot--but soon he found himself seated in the restaurant and eating a surprisingly good meal with his friends. He knew what they were trying to do--they were trying to calm him down. And it was working.
Imai knew that despite the smiles no one had forgotten that someone was missing… he could see it in all of their eyes. It was fun…but it wasn't complete.
As Imai drained the last of his coffee, some dark part of him wondered if Atsushi would really show up on Friday. But he forced that thought down to the bottom of his mind. Of course he would be there… of course.
Placing the cup back on the saucer, Imai made a note to call Atsushi's home that afternoon. Even if Atsushi wouldn't talk to him, at least he'd have the decency to answer the phone. At least Imai hoped so.
He just had to know if Atsushi made it back all right. No big deal…
Imai didn’t realize he was staring through the restaurant doors and at the front windows of the hotel until, once again, Toll elbowed him.
Imai shook himself out of a daze and focused back on his meal. So what if he missed Atsushi already… Atsushi was a big boy and could take care of himself…
So what if they'd parted with an argument. Things would get better. They would…
…as soon as Atsushi came back.
Imai sighed. Damn it. This week was going to drive him crazy.
Once again, I finished it without proof reading...so expect edits later!
Chapter Eight:
"I would say that jumping him wasn't the most tactful of solutions," Hide drawled the next morning, arms folded.
Imai didn't reply. He stared at the ugly upholstery of the furniture in Toll's hotel room, still pouting over the impromptu "group meeting" that had been called. They'd actually forced him out of bed and dragged him in here. And for what? So Hide could accuse him of being an ass while not actually saying he was an ass?
The other two hadn't even said a word besides "get up Imai" and "good morning." They sat on the bed, smoking. U-ta was jittery, losing ash all over the bed, while Toll was calm and serene, as if this was no big deal. But that was how they both handled things--flustered versus suave.
Apparently they both handled things better than Imai, who fucked up all the time.
Damn it, Hide was just watching him, waiting for Imai to speak. Imai cleared his throat--the cough sounded pitiful. But he had dehydration as an excuse. "Well, he was being so quiet and bitchy for the past few days…" he trailed off, thinking that was enough.
It wasn't. "And?"
Imai finally gave up on staring a whole through the furniture and looked up at Hide. The other man gazed back levelly. He was going to make him say it.
There had to be ways out of it, Imai knew that…but they were only temporary outs. Hide would get him in the end.
"And….I was worried about him."
Toll made a satisfied sound behind him and Imai turned to glare. Toll just grinned back at him smoothly. Damn it, they all knew each other too well.
Imai turned around in his chair, looking at each of his band members in turn--well, minus Atsushi that is, who was still locked up in his room. "What am I under arrest here or something? You guys are just as fuckin' crazy than any cops who've questioned me."
U-ta actually laughed. It was a snorted laugh, but it still counted. He tried hard to cover it up but failed.
"Yeah, arrests are hilarious U-ta." Imai took this as his time to drawl.
U-ta coughed into his fist. "No, they aren't. You are though."
Imai glowered.
"All right, now that U-ta got his laughter out for the meeting…" Hide commented, stopping anything Imai could have said in reply. "Let's carry on."
"Well, I for one think that we really shouldn't be discussing Imai's actions. We should focus on Atsushi," Toll spoke up. Imai was just about to turn around and thank him for the support when he continued. "Because Imai just acted like an idiot like he normally does."
"Hey! Hey! I did not act like an--" Imai cut himself off. Okay, so rolling around on the floor covered in beer was a bit idiotic…but they'd all done stupid stuff drunk before!
Okay, maybe not at the first after party…where there were strangers…who could tell stories. And, well, shit.
"Okay, maybe I did." Imai admitted.
"See, he admits it. So let's leave it be," Toll stated, jerking his cigarette in Imai's general direction.
Imai reached up and tried to steal it. "Give me one of those."
"You don't like this kind," Toll commented while fishing amongst the still rumbled bedding for his pack.
"I don't give a fuck. I left mine in my room."
"Well, something is obviously bothering Acchan," U-ta remarked while Imai and Toll got the cigarette situation settled.
"When isn't there something bothering him?" Imai grumbled around this stick of tobacco in his mouth.
"Okay, something worse than usual is bothering him."
Silence fell after U-ta statement. All four stared at each other.
Toll coughed. "Did anyone ask him?"
The silence was now a tad sheepish. U-ta shifted restlessly while Hide rubbed the back of his neck.
"Err…I kinda did…" Imai admitted, raising his hand a little.
"No wonder he's pissed off then…" Hide mumbled. Imai hurled Toll's nearby cigarette pack at Hide's head. Toll's indignant shout was enough warning for Hide to dodge. "You know you're not the most delicate person, Imai," Hide continued, as if he hadn't just had a projectile chucked in his direction.
"Well, it's not like Atsushi's a little whiny girl! He doesn't need kids' gloves!"
Silence again. U-ta coughed into his fist.
"He doesn't!" Imai insisted. He wasn't sure why he was standing up for Atsushi. The man had been nothing but a cranky bastard to him for the past week or so. But Atsushi had been through so much in the past few years, and to have his own friends think he couldn't make it…seemed somewhat defeatist. Or something.
Damn it. It just seemed wrong.
Imai tried to say as much. Of course it didn't come out like his brain insisted it should. "Give the guy some credit--he's been through a lot of crap recently and us talking about him like he's mentally unstable isn't helping!"
"We're not saying that!" Hide insisted, looking truly flustered for the first time that morning. He even took a step towards Imai, but that was as far as he went. He folded his arms over his chest, hands in tight fists. "We're just saying that you have to treat certain people certain ways, and sometimes it's just easier for Atsushi and for us to be a bit gentle, all right? I certainly wouldn't want to be on the end of any of your inquisitions anyway, Imai."
"Well, I noticed that Atsushi's been a bit jumpy lately," U-ta interjected, accurately interpreting the "kill-Hide" look on Imai's face. "Remember when he almost brained himself on that light post the other day, Imai?"
"What?" Toll asked, turning wide-eyes on his brother. "When did this happen?"
"Err…I didn't mention it?" U-ta looked around the room at the blank faces. "Right, I didn't, did I?"
That led to U-ta's explanation of the day in question. As he carried out that onerous task, Imai got to thinking. Okay, Atsushi's condition… One, he seemed jumpy like U-ta said. About when did that start? That afternoon… so, what could have happened between the day before and that afternoon…?
Ah, the blank spot in Imai's memory. That nagging black out….
"That's it!" Imai leapt to his feet, fist in the air. He had the insane urge to pose like an anime character, but refrained at the last second. "I'll ask him about that night!"
His triumph was met by three blank stares. "What, Imai?" Toll asked.
Imai didn't let their incomprehension bother him. "I got the answer! I'll just ask him what happened the night he dragged me home--"
"I think you have to be more specific than that…"
Imai shot U-ta a Look. "The one before the afternoon you just explained, remember? You found him in my room that morning?"
"What? Since when--"
Imai glared at Hide to shut him up. "I don't know why he was still there in the morning. Doesn't really matter. " He ignored Hide's raised eyebrow. "Do you guys remember anything strange happening that night?"
Glances were shared around the room.
"I took a shower and then went straight to bed. I didn't hear anything," Hide said.
Toll just shrugged. "I'm all the way down the hall. I didn't see or hear anything."
"I heard the two of you talking a little bit, but then I fell asleep. I do think I woke up once or twice to your hysterical laughter though, Imai… What was so funny?" U-ta asked.
Imai frowned, trying to remember. "Something….about…euh… I haven't the faintest idea." He actually rubbed at his head, trying to remember. "I…just can't remember."
"You blacked out? I didn't think you had that much to drink…" Toll murmured, idly playing with some of his hair as he thought. "We only went to that one bar afterwards, and we all went home together, so you didn't stay out drinking all night…So your memory shouldn’t be that shot…"
Imai nodded absently, still digging through his memory. Toll was absolutely right. He'd been more wasted than that before--he should remember! "Okay….I remember voices…Atsushi must have turned the TV on or something. They were all business, like newscasters or something…. But then I kinda remember….oh, fuck." Imai rubbed his head harder, using both hands this time.
Someone snatched the still smoking cigarette from his clutches. He looked up and saw Toll stubbing it out. "Before you catch your hair on fire," the other man commented quietly.
Imai thanked him with a nod and turned around. He almost jumped clear out of his seat when he saw that Hide had sat down in the chair right across from him. "Prowl much?" he sniped.
Hide's lips pulled crookedly to the side in a semi-amused grin. "No, not usually." He learned forward slightly, gazing up at Imai calmly. "Don't try to think so hard. It's only bound to make it more difficult to remember."
"But I have to try…I've been letting it slide and nothing's come to me yet…"
"Well, maybe you're right though… Maybe if you talk to Atsushi about it--rationally--you'll begin to remember more?"
"Well…I don't know what he can really tell me about the news on TV…. I don't think anything disastrous happened recently on the news… Unless we watched something else? But the TV shouldn't be a problem…"
"Then it's something else."
"But what?" Imai didn't want to bring up the suggestion that he might have done something idiotic…disastrous even… on that night. Neither did Hide apparently, if his hesitant face meant anything…
"Well, Atsushi was really friendly the next day, so I don't think it's anything you did Imai," U-ta piped up, once again accurately reading the moment.
Imai sighed. "Maybe nothing happened that night after all?" He stared down at his hands. He idly began picking at his pant legs. "Maybe something happened that morning? But what…"
"We did go to Tsukino-san's shop…but that was after Atsushi tripped…or whatever he did," U-ta said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "Maybe the light post was just an accident and something happened at Tsukino's?"
"That place? What could have happened there? It's just a bunch of junk…" But, then again, Atsushi had been rather eager to leave…a bit too eager. And there was that weird book…
Imai attention was suddenly caught up by a loud bang outside the door. Everyone in the room heard it and turned towards the door, startled.
Toll was the first one up and opening the door. The others followed him to crowd the doorframe.
Two roadies were picking up a spilled suitcase while Chiba stood there looking stricken. "I can't believe you dropped it!"
"I'm sorry!" One of the roadies mumbled. "I didn't think it would be so heavy…"
"Just put it all back in--I'll have to apologize for the disarray, but I think Sakurai-san will understand."
It struck Imai right away. "Atsushi's leaving?"
All eyes in the hall and hotel room swerved to Imai in various states of shock.
"Ah…Good morning!" Chiba commented, getting his composure quicker than anyone else. He sent the nearest roadie a glance that had them both scurrying to finish re-packing Atsushi's bag. They started off down the hall as Chiba walked towards the band members.
"Is there a party going on I don't know about?" he asked with false gaiety.
"Is it true?" U-ta asked, clinging to the doorframe, head poking out underneath Toll's arm on the door. His serious face was at sharp contrast to his comical position.
"Hmm?" Chiba hummed in response, tilting his head to the side as if he hadn't heard. Although they all knew that he was faking.
Imai pressed his lips tightly together, hands folded over his chest. He wasn't quite sure what to feel at the moment… but he must have looked angry enough to get Chiba to talk.
"Well… Sakurai-san said he wanted to return home for some rest…seeing as the next show isn't until this weekend…and in Tokyo even! So he'll just meet up with us for rehearsals, he said…" Chiba's only sign of discomfort was the way his thumb scratched at his index finger, but they all knew him well enough by now to pick it up. Or at least Imai did.
"This doesn't bother you?" Hide spoke up from the back of the pile in the doorway. Imai could hear his voice very loud in his ears, but didn't flinch.
Chiba's fingers stopped moving. "No, not at all. It's not as if we all have to stick together. Sakurai-san can take care of himself. "
Uneasiness crept into Imai without warning, clenching a cold fist around his stomach and making his heart pound a little faster. Strange… He wasn't quite sure what had caused it, but he suddenly had the urge to move.
So he did, breaking out of the pack of bodies in the door. That seemed to be the sign for the rest of them to disperse, spilling out into the hall.
"Is he still in his room?" Imai asked Chiba, who looked a bit befuddled.
"No, he went downstairs already."
So that's where Imai went. He wasn't surprised to hear the others follow.
They found Atsushi sitting in one of the lobby chairs when the elevator finally made it downstairs. His normal small travel bag sat in his lap while the suitcase the roadies had been dragging around was most likely outside being pack into the waiting taxi, the hood of which could be seen out the front windows of the hotel. Eyes closed and head resting against the back of the chair, Atsushi could have easily been mistaken for being asleep, but Imai knew better.
Imai stopped as soon as he stepped off the elevator and opened his mouth to speak, but cut off his own voice before any sound emerged. He swallowed. No, he was going to be civil. Hands fisted at his side, he settled for marching across the room and planting himself right next to Atsushi's chair. There were other people in the lobby, but he ignored them. He even ignored his fellow band mates who had stopped a distance away.
"Where are you running off to?"
Okay, so it wasn't exactly civil, but at least he hadn't shouted it across the lobby…
Atsushi stirred, opening his eyes languidly to look up at Imai, who was a bit taken aback by how bloodshot they were. It looked as if he was either hung over or hadn't slept at all. Or perhaps both.
"What do you want Imai?" he asked softly, his voice barely heard over the rattle of a luggage cart through the lobby.
Imai clenched his teeth together. He wasn't sure why he was so agitated all of a sudden--there was a whirlwind of emotions in him that made no sense whatsoever. Outraged, annoyed, amused, hurt, tired, accepting…scared.
All these tumbling emotions accomplished was to make his head hurt and that made him edgy. "Where are you going?"
Atsushi at least had the decency to sit up and look at Imai directly. His face was perfectly blank as he said, "Home. Didn't Chiba-san tell you?"
"Yes. He did."
"Then there--"
The words burst out of Imai before his brain even formed them. "Why didn't you tell m--us?" Behind the wall of his anger, Imai's was surprised at his almost slip. Me.
As if Imai was any different than the rest of the band.
Atsushi looked down at his hands folded in his lap. "I decided this morning."
"And?"
"Well, it wasn't as if any of you were around this morning," Atsushi replied with just a hint of something to his tone. Imai couldn't quite pinpoint what it was--perhaps because he was on his last bit of patience.
"Well, the way you acted last night, it's no wonder--"
Atsushi's head snapped up and he stared at Imai. "Me? The way I acted?" He put his hands down firmly on the armrest, as if he was about to push himself up.
Imai was ready for him--he actually wanted to yell at him. To scream out the building up frustration of not knowing.
Atsushi's posture must have sent up the proverbial red flag though, because soon both U-ta and Hide were there.
"Going home to get some better sleep, eh Acchan?" U-ta asked quickly with a forced smile.
Atsushi just eyed him for a long moment, before losing his grip on the chair arms. He crossed his arms across his chest instead. He titled his head in such a way that his long hair fell a bit over his eye on Imai's side. Tricky bastard.
No one really had a chance to say anything else after that. The very next moment Chiba-san appeared from wherever he'd gone off to and broke into the group around Atsushi. "All's ready to go."
Atsushi stood up, swinging his bag over his shoulder. He didn't even look in Imai's direction. "I'll see you on Friday," he said to the room at large before walking off. Chiba glanced back at the quiet band members, an unsettled look on his face, before following.
There was a moment of stillness, as if time had stopped…but then U-ta jumped forward, almost falling over a chair in his haste. "Bye, Acchan!" he called, waving frantically.
It looked as if Atsushi would just ignore him, but right before he opened the door Atsushi paused …and then turned around to wave back.
This band really relied on cues, Imai realized, because after that moment all of the others called out their farewells. Except for Imai, who remained mute. U-ta grabbed his arm and tried to make him wave, but Imai shrugged him off. Atsushi wasn't even looking at him anyway. So fuck it.
As soon as the doors closed behind that familiar dark-clad back…Imai felt his heart sink. He felt uneasy…but, damn it, once again he didn't know why. He had the insane urge to go outside, jump in the taxi, and follow Atsushi home…but what good would that do? They'd just fight the whole time…
But still, Imai had this sense of dread…
"Fuck it," he hissed, not realizing he'd voiced it aloud until Toll nudged him with his elbow. Imai glared at the older man, but Toll just raised both his eyebrows in mock innocence.
Those damn brothers are both the same, Imai thought miserably…but it was a fond misery. Especially when Toll linked arms with Imai--which was hard to do since Imai's arms were folded over his chest--and then started to steer them all towards the hotel restaurant.
"Standing around in the lobby won't get anything done," Toll announced over Imai's head to the rest of the group. "I suggest we eat. Because, I don't know about you, but I'm damned hungry."
Imai grumbled with all the energy he could muster--which was a lot--but soon he found himself seated in the restaurant and eating a surprisingly good meal with his friends. He knew what they were trying to do--they were trying to calm him down. And it was working.
Imai knew that despite the smiles no one had forgotten that someone was missing… he could see it in all of their eyes. It was fun…but it wasn't complete.
As Imai drained the last of his coffee, some dark part of him wondered if Atsushi would really show up on Friday. But he forced that thought down to the bottom of his mind. Of course he would be there… of course.
Placing the cup back on the saucer, Imai made a note to call Atsushi's home that afternoon. Even if Atsushi wouldn't talk to him, at least he'd have the decency to answer the phone. At least Imai hoped so.
He just had to know if Atsushi made it back all right. No big deal…
Imai didn’t realize he was staring through the restaurant doors and at the front windows of the hotel until, once again, Toll elbowed him.
Imai shook himself out of a daze and focused back on his meal. So what if he missed Atsushi already… Atsushi was a big boy and could take care of himself…
So what if they'd parted with an argument. Things would get better. They would…
…as soon as Atsushi came back.
Imai sighed. Damn it. This week was going to drive him crazy.