Chapter Fifteen-- Scene III

Feb 27, 2009 00:41

GOOP!

Scene III )

fic

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airian_reesu February 27 2009, 16:34:19 UTC
Epic chapter is epic. XD *brain leaks out of ear*

Yeah, I'm afraid that scene is really based off of TV drama, hence the...drama. XD

Re last scene: Yes, that's what I was going for in that scene (well, part of what I was going for). Imai *thought* he was doing good, but then....not so much. Poor Atsushi had a brain/emotion overload. XD

I thought, for about a split second, of adding a kiss in there but I quickly realized that wouldn't work. XD

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dirty_paws February 28 2009, 03:27:51 UTC
hurhurhur i lives in baltimore..... XD

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elvenlass February 27 2009, 07:38:40 UTC
Holy doodles!!! Wow! That chapter was totally made of win. I would say "moar plz" but you'd probably like a wee brain break. For this I can be patient.

Bravo!!!!

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airian_reesu February 27 2009, 16:35:52 UTC
Takes me forever to write it....and you all read it in one night. XDD

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toujin1 February 27 2009, 07:52:27 UTC
YAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I read it as slowly as I possibly could, and I think I shall go back and read it again :3
Ok, I cannot believe you drew the other three into this...totally unexpected, and I was getting as miffy with Hide as Imai was XD

Police scene => I wanted to kick that old bastard in the balls -_-

Final scene => Most adorable thing EVER! I want me an Imai!!

Great work love, this was amazing ♥

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airian_reesu February 27 2009, 16:39:22 UTC
Well, Atsushi doesn't like lying to people...so I couldn't go any other way than that. XD

Police scene=> I can't believe I actually built a character around a *police officer* that might only appear a few more times...but he kinda wrote himself. XD I don't think he was a particularly bad guy...just not a big fan of the girly famous men....

Final scene => You'll have to fight Atsushi for him. XDDD

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airian_reesu February 27 2009, 16:19:49 UTC
Yeah, I realized that scene was a bit over-dramatic, but I blame it on watching cop shows and not ever talking to a police officer in such a situation myself. XD That, and I was going for the emotions, so... Hey, it's fanfiction! XDD I did think about going back to fix it, but the flow was just sooo good and...then I'd be at it for another two hundred years, so...yeah.

I caused a Fangirl Melt. Yay! ^__^ *gets out the Fangirl mop*

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airian_reesu February 27 2009, 22:07:54 UTC
I'm curious, btw: Is there anything I could add (or subtract) easily from that scene to make it seem more realistic? (So if I ever get around to editing this beast, I'll know.)

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ladymusashi February 28 2009, 02:30:13 UTC
Wow, girl, wow. This was a great chapter.

I didn't have a problem with a police scene, not because it was realistic, but because it fit into your story well, it was a natural part of a storytelling and I think realistic would interfere with it. But, if you want to address this later - I am not exactly sure about Japanese police procedures, but using common sense - it's not likely they would questioned them on the crime scene, except preliminary (you know - what happened, who delivered the package, etc.). The scene between a detective and Atsushi would more likely happen it the police station (and that would interfere with the story flow), and I'm pretty certain that B-T company would not allow that kind of a treatment. As far as I know, the police procedure in Japan is different than in U.S. (for example, the police in U.S. has to release the person if they're not charged within 48 hrs, in Japan 22-23 days - see here). So, really, don't worry about it too much, I really think you should leave it, unless it bothers you a lot, but then ( ... )

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airian_reesu February 28 2009, 14:46:34 UTC
Epic chapter is epic, like I said above. XDDD ( ... )

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