I've already said how much I admire your use of language in this piece. Your imagery is gorgeous, it radiates warmth and energy.
There is only one paragraph I would make any changes to at all: Also the music. The melodies of Mexico are as vibrant as her colors-the tones and beats weave such a sweet story that it is almost possible to taste the chords hanging in the air. It is the music that made the largest impression on me. It seems that music has a way of describing its culture; every country can be represented by a dance. I think the opening sentence of this paragraph is a bit plain, compared to the rest of the piece. If you took it out, and replaced it with :It is the music that made the largest impression on me, the paragraph would fit much better
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I've already said how much I admire your use of language in this piece. Your imagery is gorgeous, it radiates warmth and energy.
There is only one paragraph I would make any changes to at all:
Also the music. The melodies of Mexico are as vibrant as her colors-the tones and beats weave such a sweet story that it is almost possible to taste the chords hanging in the air. It is the music that made the largest impression on me. It seems that music has a way of describing its culture; every country can be represented by a dance. I think the opening sentence of this paragraph is a bit plain, compared to the rest of the piece. If you took it out, and replaced it with :It is the music that made the largest impression on me, the paragraph would fit much better ( ... )
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