CHAPTERED | 3 Days Chapter 5

[aitakutemo]

3 Days
pg-13 | au, angst, romance | 5/5
aitakutemo beta-ed by the_ladder
"if you're to be given, let's just say three more days with him... what would you do?"


Chapter Five
The sun was rising, little by little covering the earth with its warmth, turning the night’s coldness into drops of dew on the leaves. The weather was nice, and just like predicted by yesterday’s forecast, it was going to be a bright day with wide blue sky and fluffy white clouds. For everyone else, this was a good thing to start their day, before they come back to their busy schedules and mounting job tasks.

But not for someone who was standing stoically in front of the door. He was supposed to get ready for another long drive back to Seoul, but his feet won’t move an inch. The only thing he did was only staring at another person who was busy getting something ready in the kitchen.

The person, who noticed that he was being watched, turned his back to face his watcher.

“What is it, Yunnie?” a smile added to those words.

Yunho dumbfounded. He shook his head gently, muttering ‘nothing’ before picking up their bags and proceeded walking to the door. Jaejoong only shrugged and turned back to his work, preparing some breakfast for the two of them.

“Are you done yet?” Yunho said, after a couple of minutes later, as he sat in the chair near Jaejoong.

“Yup…” the other guy answered, putting their breakfasts in the table; a scramble egg for himself and a grilled sandwich for Yunho, plus a couple of toasts. He then turned around reaching for the tea pot to pour some for both of them.

“So,” Jaejoong began, “how’s things back in the city?”

“Apparently the boys could take care of the problems…” Yunho sipped his tea a bit, “they told them that we’re out due to something urgent.”

“And then?”

“Nobody suspected…” Yunho leaned back to his chair, giving out a satisfied expression.

“Ahaha… thank god, I was afraid people would bombard us with questions when we get home…” Jaejoong moved his hand to reach one of the toasts before taking a bite from it.

“But still, even if they do question us, it’s your job to make the reasons…”

“Aish, why me?” Yunho choked on his tea.

“Well, it’s your idea…”

“And you agree with it…”

“Yunho…” Jaejoong threw a tired expression at Yunho, who was smirking playfully while biting his grilled sandwich.

“Yes, boo… Just relax, okay? I got everything under control,” he assured Jaejoong by touching his hand. The older guy gave him a slight nod before continuing his breakfast.

Time seemed to be passing so quickly and soon Yunho found himself sitting on the driver’s seat, hearing Jaejoong humming some melodies from songs he cannot figure out what. The younger tightened his grip on the steer. Although his eyes were on the road in front of him, his mind was in trance. There’s a part of himself that want to just stop the car right there, turn around, and run as far as he could, to a place where there’ll be just the two of them.

But he knew better not to try to do that. The deal was not telling or preventing Jaejoong from his own death, and it’d be more painful if the things were turned back to the real way like before and he has to live with full regret.

"It’s better this way…: Yunho muttered under his breath, like a mantra. In his last hours, he would need more than will power to let the accident re-occur again.

“Joongie…” Jaejoong stopped whatever he was singing and gave Yunho his full attention,

“Yeah?”

“I was just wondering… how do you feel in these last three days?”

The older guy kept silence for a while, before taking one deep breath and let it out noisily, as if he was trying to calm himself. “I’m happy, Yunho, I really am…” he smiled.

“Really?”

“Yeah… I got everything I ever wished for, you, you, and again… you…” Jaejoong talked in a singsong tone, and Yunho can’t help but also smiled.

“In other word, I’d die happily,”

The smile in Yunho’s face disappeared and turned to a frown.

“Don’t talk like that…” he grabbed Jaejoong’s hand, “I don’t want to hear you saying such thing again, ever, okay?”

“Ah, so you’re afraid of losing me?” the older guy joked,

“Yes…”

“Aww my Yunho-ya…” Jaejoong gave him a soft expression, “you’re such a cute puppy sometimes… no worry, I won’t go anywhere… I’ll stay with you…”

Yunho could felt his grip on the steer weakened and his arms a bit shaking. To lessen the nervousness, he then tapped his foot nervously, “always?”

“Always,” Jaejoong nodded, “and even though one day…” he paused to see Yunho’s expression, “one day I won’t be able to stand beside you, just remember, I’ll be right here…” he moved his hand to touch Yunho’s chest.

Stop it please, Yunho prayed silently, I’m the leader and I must stay still.

“I can’t promise you eternity, because I won’t live forever, but as long as my spirit still alive, I’ll always be by your side…”

That was it. Yunho slowed down the car and stopped on the edge of the road, earning a confused and shocked look from Jaejoong. He then turned to him with eyes already sparkling with tears and body trembling with fear. “Jae…” he whispered so softly, barely inaudible if only Jaejoong wasn’t giving him his full attention. Jaejoong, knowing that was a signal when Yunho’s about to break, quickly reached the younger guy and pulled him into a hug. And just when Yunho’s chin touched Jaejoong’s shoulder, tears started falling down.

“Don’t go…”

“I’m here, Yunho…”

“Don’t go…”

“I’m here, baby…” Jaejoong slowly pat Yunho’s back, trying to comfort the still shaking guy.

“Don’t go…” Yunho silently cursed himself while sobbing in Jaejoong’s shoulder. He wasn’t supposed to cry, a guy wasn’t supposed to cry, heck he even has promised to make Jaejoong’s last days the happiest in his life, yet here he was; sobbing like a weak person in his lover’s comfort, and all he could do was only repeating those words.

“Don’t go… don’t go, please…”

“Shhh… shhh baby…” now Jaejoong was cradling Yunho softly as he tightened his embrace to him and stroked his dark tresses.

“I’m so scared, Jae… I’m so scared that you’ll leave me… I’m so scared to be alone… I’m so scared… I don’t want to do it again… please…”

“Ssshhh…”

“Jae…” Yunho’s voice broke into full sobs. How he wished he could just tell the other guy what’s really bothering his feeling right now, how he wished he could just asked Jaejoong to promise not to go with the damn car later, how he wished time would just freeze right now and he could stay right here, feeling save inside Jaejoong’s arms and warm with his body wrapped closely to himself.

And so both only sat there in silence for what Yunho felt like hours. Jaejoong didn’t even budge even though Yunho’s tears already wetting his clothes and his sweat now streaking to his own body. He just stayed there, stroking Yunho’s back gently and keep murmuring words of comfort in the younger’s ears while he helplessly hanging to Jaejoong’s body, clutching on his arm like his life’s depended on it.

“I love you, Yunho… I love you…” Jaejoong whispered, as Yunho’s body starting to calm down, “…you must be thinking about that nightmare… don’t worry; it’s just a dream…”

“Uh?” Yunho tensed a bit,

“I know you’re having a nightmare this morning… and also three days ago… even though you didn’t tell me, I know how you’re suffering… I kept waking up and saw you sweating and shaking in your sleep. Plus the way you jumped on me back then…

“Don’t worry, I won’t go anywhere, I promise,”

Yunho pulled back from Jaejoong’s embrace and the light haired guy let him. He then wiped his tears using his sleeve and smiled nervously, “aigo, I’m such a crybaby…” Yunho said in a pushed-to-be-cheerful tone, although he wasn’t sure if it could fool the other guy. “don’t tell anyone I cried because of some silly dreams, okay?”

“Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me,” Jaejoong smirked in return. He was just about to lean back to his seat when all of the sudden a hand touched his chin and pull him to a kiss. Jaejoong smiled to his kisser’s lips before parting his to Yunho’s request. And when both finally pulling back for air, that smile was still plastered on Jaejoong’s face.

“Just promise me one thing… if there’s anything, anything bothering you, please tell me… I know I’m not a good talker but I could be a good listener,”

“Definitely,” Yunho answered honestly, then proceed to move the car, “and Jae…”

Jaejoong turned his head,

“Thank you…”

“Anytime, baby…”

“What!?”

The boys were just stepping their feet on the place where they’ll do some photo shoots that afternoon. It was a simple abandoned building located not so far from the city, just like their T album jacket photo shoots.

Yunho didn’t even bother to lift up his head from his bag. He already knew Yoochun would yell two seconds after Junsu said that he left his cell in the restaurant where they stopped before, and then Changmin would join them, muttering;

“Geez, hyung… I know you're talented and all, but please, can you stop being a fool and stop joking?”

Then Junsu would fight back, “no I’m not… I was just forgot, kay?”

ChangMin would laugh in sarcasm, “hahahah, yeah whatever…”

And Yoochun would stick to Junsu, “yah, show some respect to your hyung!”

Yunho let out a deep growl. He wished he could do something or anything to the bloody thing. But all he could do was only watching in silent when Junsu foolishly left his cell near the counter, after all, it’s one of the causes of Jaejoong’s death and he has agreed not to interfere with it. He glanced just in time to see the person whose been haunting his mind walking to the rest of the band.

“Just buy a new one,” ChangMin suggested half-heartedly.

“No! I can’t! I-I mean…” Junsu stuttered, “of course I can… but…-”

“-But there are some important stuffs in that cell, right Su?”

“Y-yes…” Junsu nodded, suddenly trying to avoid eye contacts from both Changmin and Yoochun.

“So what? We’re just can’t go back now, we’re up next!”

“But if we’re not taking it now…”

“I’ll take it…” Jaejoong popped in, making his dongsaengs startled, especially Junsu, “I got the last turn. Now where’d you left your cell again?”

“I don’t know… but I think I left it in the counter… you know, the one in the corner?”

Jaejoong sighed, “okay then, I’ll be going now, tell Manager-sshi I’ll be back later…” Jaejoong turned back before Junsu started squealing in happiness. The oldest of the band shook his head. Even after all these time, he still has to be one taking care of everything. He was going to take his car key and stopped when someone already throw it right in front of him.

“Here…” Yunho smirked and Jaejoong fold his arms in front of his chest, pouting.

“Were you eavesdropping again?”

“I just happen to stand near you… oh wait, I always stand near you…”

Jaejoong titled his head, “Yunho-ah…”

“I’m coming with you, may I?”

“So now you’re reading my mind?”

“Don't I always?” he smirked back.

“Okay then, Mr. I-know-all, what else did you found on my big head here?”

“Emm…” Yunho pretended to think, “what should I do to satisfy my Yunnie tonight?”

Jaejoong threw the key to Yunho’s chest, making the guy laugh.

“Hey boo… I saw your cheeks’ reddening…” Yunho teased and soon he was protecting himself from Jaejoong’s punches, “yes… yes… auch! Auch, I’m sorry, boo… really… ahahaha… ouch, that’s hurt!” Yunho rubbed his head.

“That’s for making me blush!” Jaejoong stated,

“Ha! So you’re admitting that you did blush?” Yunho’s grin widened. “AUCH!! Now that’s really hurt…” he pouted.

“Well, are you coming or not?” Jaejoong stomped to the door. Yunho was still pouting when he reached Jaejoong and as they both walking to the car, Jaejoong’s extended his hand to Yunho,

“Give me back the key, I’m driving. We don’t have much time and only god know when we’d reach the restaurant if you’re behind the wheels.”

“Nah, you hurt me…”

“Yunho… don’t be such a kid now, or do you want me to use another car?”

The leader pouted again before nearing Jaejoong and lowered his head; looking like a hurt puppy, “my head’s still hurt…” he gave Jaejoong his best puppy-eyes.

“There there…” Jaejoong caressed Yunho’s head gently and pulled his head before giving it a kiss, “feeling better?” he asked,

Yunho was actually going to reply with ‘never, unless you stay here with me’ but “not yet… but I’m sure another kiss would help…” came out of his mouth swiftly.

The latter sighed in defeat, “okay then,” Jaejoong licked his lips before tiptoeing and pecked Yunho’s lips. But the taller man already trapped him inside his arms and sank his lips, asking for a deeper kiss, which Jaejoong quickly obliged. And Yunho was just starting to push Jaejoong’s body to the car door when suddenly his lover pulled back, cheeks already flushed and lips somewhat swollen.

“N-no, Yunho… there are people watching…”

“Too bad I don’t give a damn…” Yunho smirked, but added when he saw Jaejoong pouted, “well then should we continue inside?” he slid the car key and opened the lock.

Jaejoong slapped Yunho’s arm playfully, “later, Yunho… we have to get Su’s phone first, remember? It’s not like I’m going anywhere or something.”

Yunho snapped at Jaejoong’s words. Some realization came to his mind. He forced out a smile to himself and nodded.

“Yeah, you’re right…” Yunho sat and stared at Jaejoong while the guy circling the car, made his way to the driver’s seat. “…you’re not going anywhere…”

“Kamsahamnida…” Jaejoong bowed to the old lady who owns the restaurant. He pulled the phone and examined it once again. Just when he and Yunho reached the restaurant, the old lady quickly approach them asking whether it was their cellphone. Jaejoong could tell how glad he was, meaning he won’t need to look around for the bloody thing.

But on the other side, Yunho only leaned to the pillar near the door. Fate really unchangeable, isn’t it? He won’t deny that he tried to hold Jaejoong as much as he could by kissing him and occasionally trying to make him to slow his car down, but look at now. He didn’t remember the old lady before. Back then, he and Jaejoong have to work their asses off to find Junsu’s cell, plus the suspicious look the waitresses gave them.

“Let’s go back, then…” Yunho was brought back from his reverie with Jaejoong already standing in front of him. Seeing nothing more he could do Yunho weakly nodded and followed Jaejoong’s gesture to the front door. His breath hitched every time he took each step. Steps that will bring him closer to Jaejoong’s accident.

And the next ride just passed with Jaejoong chatting just like usual and Yunho only mumbles and nods occasionally. But soon something’s captured Yunho’s eyes and he realized; they’re almost there.

Yunho tensed. Just after this turn…

“Yunho, are you listening to me?”

The truck was visible now,

“I love you, Yunho… don’t worry…”

He had to make a choice,

“Yunho?”

“Jaejoong…!!”

The rain keep falling besides you, watering your already wet clothes, as you lay in the street, covered in crimson liquids.

But this time it’s different,

It’s not him,

It’s not Jaejoong,

It’s not anyone else,

It’s-

Drip… drip… drip…

“Y-Yunho…”

You.

Yunho lost count of how long he stayed in the road, completely wet with the rain kept falling on him. Yunho gazed weakly to Jaejoong’s eyes, which now are filled by tears… or maybe it’s just the rain drops?

“Jae…”

Jaejoong quickly grasped his hand inside his as he nodded quickly; making him felt the tremble on his body, “Yunho… w-why…?”

The same question popped in Yunho’s mind;

Why?

With both eyes still locked on Jaejoong’s coal colored ones, Yunho let out a smile, “Why…?”

“Would you believe if I say I’m crazily in love with you?”

Jaejoong shook his head as he used his thumb to wipe out some blood, Yunho’s blood, off his forehead, “you… how could you say such things in moment like this…?”

“Can’t help it…” the younger guy’s smile turned changed to a smirk, although it was hurting him, he tried to push back those groans by gritting his teeth, “it’s just… one of my charms…”

Jaejoong’s lips formed a faint smile, but Yunho knew too well that he was just faking it. They kept silence while Jaejoong moved Yunho’s head and laid it on his lap, stroking his black hair gently.

Drip… drip… drip…

“It hurts, Jae…”

Jaejoong looked shocked, before trying to examine Yunho’s injuries. A worried look made its way to his angelic face as he realized it was more than just usual wound because somehow the blood kept coming out, “I… I’ve called the ambulance…” his voice still sounded shaky, “…they’ll b-be here soon, so you don’t need to worry-“

“No…” Yunho lied, because he knew more than anyone else, even Jaejoong himself that his whole body felt like hell, not to mention how it’s getting harder just to breath or simply just to stay awake.

He reached his hand out to grab Jaejoong’s, while the other guy only watched him with tears that forming on his eyes. “it’s hurt… seeing you hurt…”

“What do you mean…?” Jaejoong choked, “I s-should be the one saying that-”

“You don’t know…” he kept talking like Jaejoong never interrupted him. “you don’t know how much it hurt… you don’t know how it felt to actually watch you as you close your eyes for the last time…”

“What are you saying? Yunho, please…” Jaejoong begged, “olease stop saying those things… you're scaring me… we’re going to make it… believe me…”

“Believe me…” although his voice sounded so sure, Jaejoong was actually trying to convince himself that everything’s going to be alright. Soon the ambulance will come and they will handle Yunho, and everything going to be just fine.

He could imagine how he would come to Yunho’s room and tease him about his bandages. How he would feed him and he’d respond with a growl, but still opens his mouth. How he would try to steal kisses and hugs when the nurses’ aren’t around.

Yunho shook his head, “you made me promised to tell you anything… and I did, now would you promise me something?”

Somehow Jaejoong could already know what Yunho’s request going to be, and he tried to cut his words, but Yunho’s finger was already on his lips, signaling him to listen.

“I want you to promise that you will find someone… I want you to find a person who would make you happy, who would take care of you, who would be there for you…

“Who would help you… to forget everything about me…”

Jaejoong cried silently. He closed his eyes and brought his hand to touch the younger’s finger, kissing them slowly as he murmured Yunho’s name under his breath. Yunho winced at the sight before him. Everything seemed so mixed up; Jaejoong crying, the pain in his whole body, Jaejoong’s sobs, the coldness of the rain, Jaejoong’s broken voice, the consequences of his actions, yet only one thing came out;

Am I doing the right thing?

“…you’re kidding, right?” suddenly the light haired guy laugh dryly, but a tear still made its way down his already puffy cheek. “you’re going to survive! We’re going to make it! Don’t talk like that!”

“I’m telling the truth,”

“Then all of this are fake!” he shouted, earning a gape from Yunho, who suddenly felt something painful hit his chest, making him cough hardly twice to release the invincible lump. When he finally opened his eyes, Jaejoong’s worried face was already in front of him.

“Yunho…”

“Promised?”

“Don’t you hear me!?” Jaejoong’s voiced rose again, “I won’t! No one could replace you, so stop asking! Stop! Or I’ll… I’ll hate you!”

“Then hate me… and forget me…”

Jaejoong looked like he was going to argue, but instead he only hung his head and sighed, “you won’t stop until I said yes, will you…?”

Yunho shook his head and Jaejoong sighed in defeat, “okay…”

“And one more thing, Jae…?” The latter raised his head, half-heartedly hoping that it wouldn’t be anything stupid or worse, impossible. It’s already hard enough to just lie that he’ll keep his promise, because he can’t and even though he act the best he could, Yunho would know whether he was making it up or not. Fortunately, today the wounded guy doesn’t even look for his eyes when he agreed.

“…would you sing for me…?”

“Yah…?”

“Sing for me…” Yunho repeated, “I want to hear you sing,” for the last time…

“Okay…” Jaejoong straightened his position; moved his body so slowly so he won’t shake his lover’s body too much. Once he settled, Jaejoong smiled to Yunho and started stroking his hair,

“Chanranhan jeo haetsarui banjjagim…”

As Jaejoong’s melody flowing in, Yunho’s mind starting to went off. He had taken everything under control, just like his duty, as a responsible leader. He had made sure Jaejoong would be taken care of, at least by himself, and he doesn’t need to be worry about the other three, because his was sure his dongsanges would be able to take it. Now with all those hard thinking lifted from his mind, Yunho could felt his wounds getting hurt, especially from his arms and above, but on the contrary, he couldn’t feel his legs anymore. Wait, was all of the pains in his body seemed disappeared or his lower parts have just getting number?

“Chokchokhan ne kkochip moa dama, sarangeul soksagineun…”

Yunho chuckled in his mind, so this is what Jaejoong felt back then? He couldn’t imagine bearing all these pains and numb feelings plus having Jaejoong only watch him and kept shouting at him.

“Like flowers my baby, shinggeureon ne momjitdo, hwanhan misodo budeureon ibsuldo…”

He has been a big jerk back then, and he knew, there’ll be a hell to pay after this moments-of-heaven pass.

“Stay with me ojik nae gyeoteseo, blow my heart maeil pieonajullae, pyeongsaeng nae gaseume,

"Say you stay, always…”

He could remember, although barely, when they both sat on the couch that evening. How they sang the song, and how he ended it with asking Jaejoong to stay, and how the guy answered with all honesty in his eyes... but now, it seemed that it has been years ago…

“…geujeo sarang ape… so stay…”for love, so stay… Yunho don’t know what’s more touching, Jaejoong’s soft whispering voice or the way his eyes gazed down over him with such love and… hope…

It was just so beautiful that it’s hurt…

“Stay with me neomu areumdaun, shine your leaves, gadeuk pieonajullae, naman bol su ittge. Stay, you stay always…”

Yunho could feel his eyes closing; suddenly it’s getting so hard to just stay awake. He wanted to close it, he want to just let go, to let all the soreness feel disappear…

“Stay with me… Ojik nae gyeoteseo,”

At least… at least… let him finish… he prayed silently in his heart, although his mind’s too blurry to even create a whole sentence,

“Blow my heart maeil pieonajullae, pyeongsaeng nae gaseume…”

Jaejoong bent his head down closer to Yunho’s, “…say you stay…?”

But his reply never came,

And Jaejoong found himself crying alone in the rain…
originally posted here.