teylafen ficathon entry
Title: Mischief Managed
Author: Alasse
Category: gen
Rating: K+
Summary: Teyla puts up with a lot from the boys. But girls always win in the end…
A/N: apologies to J.K. Rowling for the title. Many thanks as always to the yahell gang, Dee, Aniko, Yllek and Em for suggestions, corrections and encouragement.
This is for the Teyla ficathon on teylafen. Blending of two requests - Teyla being mischievous and Teyla using her ‘super powers’.
Teyla Emmagen knew from the start it would be a bad day. First she woke at her customary 4 AM with a kink in her neck and an aching head. Then she twisted her ankle in her morning sparring with Ronon. He’d gallantly offered to carry her to infirmary, an indignity she refused. Waving him off on his morning run with Sheppard, she limped instead to the mess hall.
She took a plate of fruit and toast, and a mug for her morning tea, only to discover that there was no tea.
“Sorry, ma’am,” Sgt Enrique Sanchez, the marine on breakfast duty that morning apologized. “Dr. Weir was pretty upset too when she found out the green tea was gone. If you ask me,” he lowered his voice. “Dr. McKay hacked into the last supply order and exchanged the tea order for coffee. We’ve got at least a ton of beans back there,” he indicated the kitchen behind him. “Why don’t you try some coffee? I can add some hot water if it’s too strong.”
Teyla set her mouth in a firm line, and nodded politely at the chubby marine, who filled her cup with the steaming black brew. She eyed it doubtfully as she made her way to a table in the nearly empty room. The strong Athosian tea she was used to had been gone for months, and would it be much longer before there was more, as her people were having trouble getting those plants to thrive in the soil of the mainland.
Dr Weir had introduced her to a variety of earth teas, which while not quite as good, she was becoming used to. Along with Weir she preferred the green tea with its light taste. However, Dr. Weir drank coffee as well, so Teyla lifted the cup and took a cautious sip.
She nearly gagged as the bitter liquid scalded her throat. Putting down the mug quickly, she stared at it in horror. She stabbed a piece of fruit with her fork and ate it almost without chewing, trying to erase the taste of the coffee.
“Try it with some milk and sugar.” She looked up to see that Sgt Sanchez had come over to her with a handful of little packets. She raised an eyebrow questioningly.
“International Delight,” he said, spreading out a series of little cups. “Vanilla, hazelnut, Irish crème. Or just plain half and half. Sugar, Splenda, Equal,” He continued, laying down several white, yellow and blue packets.
Teyla frowned uncertainly. “Which is best?” she asked.
“Well personally I like the Irish crème,” Sanchez said with a grin. “And we’ll put in some sugar to make sure it’s sweet enough.” He poured and stirred until the coffee was a light creamy brown. “Now try.”
She took a small sip. Now instead of bitter the coffee was syrupy sweet. “Better,” she managed, with a smile at Sanchez, who grinned back. She waited till he’d returned to his post before putting the mug back down with a sigh.
“Someone’s got a crush on you.”
She looked up as Dr. Rodney McKay slid into the chair across from her. He placed his large metal mug on the table and yawned widely. McKay scorned the mess hall mugs as ‘shot glasses’ and always brought his own.
“A… crush?” She repeated.
“Enrique Iglesias there,” McKay waved in Sanchez’ direction. “You make his day just by showing up for breakfast.”
“His name is Sanchez,” she corrected him.
“Whatever.” McKay took a long drag of his coffee and sighed contentedly.
Teyla’s eyes narrowed as she watched McKay drink his coffee. “Rodney,” she said. “What does it mean to ‘hack into’ something?”
McKay nearly choked on his coffee, recovered, and swallowed before clearing his throat. “Hack into? Where did you hear that?”
“In conversation,” Teyla answered vaguely.
“I see,” leaning back into his chair McKay began to explain, “Hack is a computer term for ignoring all the normal measures of accessing information, in effect bypassing all normal security protocols and firewalls…”
“Firewalls,” Teyla repeated frowning. She could see how fire would be harmful to the computers, but…
“Never mind,” McKay sighed and took another long drag of coffee. “Let me see if I can use an illustration you’ll understand.” There was more than a trace of condescension in his voice.
“Say you go on the offensive against an opponent you’re pretty sure you can’t defeat, at least not physically. Instead of using a frontal assault, you’d try other methods, to get past their defenses, right? Unless you’re Ronon,” he mused. “He’d just attack anyway for the hell of it…”
“Rodney.”
“Right, focus.” He took another drink. “So you need to find another way to get past their defenses. And in my world, where we don’t always fight with physical strength but our brains, if some information is protected, then we…”
“Find another way to enter.”
“In simplistic terms, yeah.” McKay shrugged and upended the cup, pouring the last drop of coffee onto his tongue.
“I understand,” Teyla said thoughtfully, taking another sip of her own coffee and quickly putting the cup back down with a grimace.
“I’m sure you do.” McKay patted her on the arm and stood. “I need a refill. See you at the gate.”
~^~^~
By the time Teyla had gathered her gear and made her way to the gate room for their mission, her stomach was beginning to churn. Wishing she hadn’t forced herself to finish the coffee rather than waste food, she pushed down the feelings of discomfort and nodded a polite greeting to her teammates and Dr. Weir.
Colonel Sheppard and Dr. McKay were engaged in their usual verbal sparring over the name of the planet to be visited.
“Oxtail,” attempted Sheppard.
McKay rolled his eyes. “Can you please keep your mind off your stomach for two minutes? This is a planet, not a soup.”
“Oh, look who’s talking,” Sheppard shot back. “Mister ‘we’ve been here a whole five minutes, let’s break out the emergency rations’.”
Teyla sighed and exchanged a glance with Ronon, who arched an amused eyebrow in response.
“We’re going to yet another primitive planet to barter for vegetables,” McKay continued. “Could we at least get the name right, so we can leave with what we came for instead arrows or other sharp pointy objects imbedded in our backs?”
“Since when have you been concerned about pissing off the natives?” Sheppard asked.
“Since they started shooting at us. And in the interest of getting home as quickly as possible. Look, the name of the planet is Oztfall.”
“Yeah, that’s what I said. Oxtail.”
McKay groaned. “Elizabeth.”
“You have a go,” Weir said, cheerfully ignoring the argument.
The gate opened with its usual splashing sound, and they stepped through, cutting McKay off just as he was about to resume arguing.
They exited the gate into a bright green meadow of grasses and wildflowers, ringed with trees in the distance. Just inside the ring of trees was a small village of wood and straw huts.
“I’ll huff and I’ll puff,” murmured Sheppard, “and I’ll blow your house in.”
Teyla frowned at him. “Why would Colonel Sheppard wish to blow up these homes?” she asked Ronon softly. He shrugged.
“It’s probably an expression,” he said, nodding wisely. “From their box.”
“Whew,” McKay walked out in front of them, fanning himself. “It is hot here, or is it me.”
“It’s you, Rodney,” Sheppard replied. McKay glared at him. “Well you saw the MALP said it was over eighty degrees, so why did you wear a jacket?”
“Because one of your people programmed the MALP in the very unscientific system of Fahrenheit,” McKay muttered, pulling off the offending jacket and tying it around his waist.
Teyla was wishing for one of her cool skirts herself by the time they crossed the meadow to the village. A child was the first to see them, and ran into the closest hut, squealing. Within seconds people came pouring out of the huts, talking in hushed tones and staring at the visitors in awe.
Colonel Sheppard adjusted his sunglasses, put on one of his more charming smiles, and walked forward. “Hi,” he said, giving the people in front of him a wave, “I’m-“
Before he had a chance to continue, the crowd parted to let through a man who was hastily pulling a pale silver cloak across his shoulders. He dropped to his knees before Sheppard, bowing low with his forehead to the ground.
Sheppard stared at him with his mouth open. He turned to McKay, who shrugged. “At least they’re not shooting,” the physicist whispered.
“Perhaps you should say something to him,” Teyla suggested.
The man whipped up his head and sank back onto his heels with his arms spread. “I am sorry,” he said. “I do not wish to offend, only to give the Ancestors the honor that they deserve.”
“Oh,” Sheppard looked at McKay and Teyla again for help. McKay shrugged again.
“Tell him we’re not the Ancestors,” he said.
“We’re not the Ancestors,” Sheppard repeated.
The man smiled. “Please. We have heard the stories. The Ancestors have returned to fight the Wraith. They travel through the ring, carrying weapons such as yours.” He indicated Sheppard’s P90.
Sheppard looked down at his weapon, and back at the man. “McKay,” he hissed.
“I’m out,” McKay said. “Just keep denying everything.”
Teyla sighed. She stepped forward and gave a respectful nod to the man kneeling before them. “I am Teyla,” she said. “I am not an Ancestor, but from Athos, a world destroyed by the wraith. What is your name?”
“I am Ardino,” The man said, rising gracefully to his feet. “I speak for the people here.”
“This is Colonel Sheppard, Dr. McKay, and Ronon.” Teyla indicted her teammates. “It is true that the colonel and doctor are from a world far away. But they are not Ancestors.”
“Far from it,” Ronon muttered. Teyla silenced him with a glare.
“Thank you Teyla,” Sheppard smiled at her and then turned to Ardino. “We had hoped to be able to trade…”
“Of course, of course,” Ardino smiled widely. His voice dropped to barely above a whisper. “We understand your need for secrecy.” He gave them a broad wink, and then his voice resumed normal timbre. “Come, join us for a meal, and we shall discuss what we have to trade.”
He turned and gestured for them to follow him.
“Well,” McKay murmured after a pause. “I guess we’re Ancestors.” He clapped Sheppard on the shoulder. “Lead on, oh One with the Hyperactive Gene.”
Sheppard shot him an annoyed look but fell into step behind Ardino.
“Teyla,” Ronon, bringing up the rear, nudged her shoulder. “You see anything strange about those crops?”
Teyla looked out at the field they were passing. Bordering on the flowery meadow where row after row of dark green leaves. She turned to the other side of the path and saw the same plants, stretching to the trees. “They are all the same,” she answered.
“Guess they eat a lot of lettuce,” McKay said, sounding disappointed.
Ronon frowned. “That’s not lettuce.”
“Oh and you would know from vegetables?” McKay rolled his eyes. “Though,” he added thoughtfully. “You’re right, it looks more like… never mind.”
“Never mind?” Ronon echoed. McKay had turned a delicate shade of red. “Looks like what, McKay?”
“Well, well,” Sheppard looked over his shoulder with an amused glance at his teammate. “Dabbled in a little botany in college, did we McKay?”
“Just once,” McKay muttered. “And I didn’t inhale.”
“Yeah? So this looks like a drug from your world?” Ronon looked a little too interested, Teyla thought, and she gave him a frown to let him know her disapproval.
“It’s called ‘pot’ Ronon,” Sheppard said. “And if you want to try some, I suggest you bug Zelenka. I hear he’s growing some down in that old abandoned lab where he keeps his still.”
Ronon nodded thoughtfully.
“Not that I condone that of course,” Sheppard continued, giving Teyla a wink.
“Of course,” Teyla answered coldly, spreading her frown to include him and McKay.
“Relax, Mom,” Sheppard said. “We promise to behave, don’t we kids?
“Speak for yourself, Dad,” McKay answered.
Ronon just laughed.
Teyla was saved from a response by their arrival at Ardino’s hut. The child that had heralded their presence to the village earlier was waiting for them in the doorway. Through the straw and wood walls came the smells of roasting meat.
Her own stomach twisted as she saw the salivating looks on the faces of her teammates.
“Come in, come in,” Ardino waved them through the doorway that grazed the tops of Sheppard’s and McKay’s heads. Ronon ducked low and still managed to get some straw stuck in his hair.
The hut opened up into a single room. A low wooden table was surrounded by plain cloth cushions on the dirt floor. In the far corner, a fireplace held a large iron pot, and a spit for roasting meat. Ardino seated himself cross-legged on the cushion at the head of the table, and gestured the others to do the same.
Ronon looked around the hut, frowning. “Sheppard,” he said in a low voice. “There’s only one entrance.”
“At ease, Scarecrow,” Sheppard replied. “Have a seat.” He smiled at their host and took the closest cushion. Two giggling girls immediately placed a platter of meat in front of him. The smell of food soon overcame the Satedan’s misgivings, and he followed suit.
McKay sat next to Sheppard, and Teyla lowered herself to the cushion next to Ronon’s, surreptitiously picking the straws out of the nearest of his braids.
A platter of meat was set in front of her. The roasted pink flesh was surrounded by a few scrawny root vegetables, and clumps of the greens they had seen in the fields. Greens were strewn across the top of the meat as well, a wilting garnish.
Teyla poked tentatively at the meat with her knife, and was rewarded by a stream of pink tinged juice. Her stomach flipped and she tasted bile in the back of her throat. Swallowing hard, she looked up quickly. Sheppard and McKay had tucked happily into their food, and Ronon’s was nearly gone. Deep in conversation, Ardino was not looking her way, and the giggling girls had vanished along with the child. Teyla slid her meat onto Ronon’s plate, and assumed an expression of attentiveness.
“This is really good,” McKay said, around a mouthful of meat and greens. “Let’s trade for some of this.”
“All right,” Sheppard smiled at their host. “What do you say, Ardino?” We’ve got…” he waved his hands expansively, “all kinds of stuff.”
The smoke from the cooking fire was making Teyla dizzy as well as nauseas. She excused herself as politely as possible, and escaped through the door. Once outside she stumbled a few paces and leaned against a tree, inhaling deeply. A breeze lifted her hair, drying the cold sweat on the back of her neck. She shivered.
“Are you alright, lady?” Teyla looked down to see the boy from earlier looking up at her worriedly.
“I am fine.” She straightened away from the tree and ran a quick hand through her hair, tucking it behind her ears. “I only wanted to see more of the village. Perhaps you could show me?”
The boy raised his eyebrows doubtfully. “There is not very much to see.”
“Those crops looked interesting,” she said, gesturing toward the fields, and as far away from the smoky hut as she could see.
The boy’s eyebrows climbed higher. He shrugged, in a very earth-like gesture. “If you say so.” He led the way through the small cluster of huts to the fields of green plants.
The further they moved from the hut where the others ate, the clearer Teyla’s head became. Once she was sure she was not going to humiliate herself in front of her new friend by losing the contents of her stomach, she relaxed and enjoyed the feeling of the warm sun on her face.
“My name is Teyla,” she said, looking down. The boy had stopped at the edge of the field, and was hopping on one foot, kicking a dark green leaf with the other.
“I am Nesto,” the boy said. “Ardino’s son.”
“Ah,” Teyla smiled. “Then it is very nice to finally make your acquaintance, Nesto.”
The boy shrugged again, and gave the plant a more vicious kick. The top leaf broke off and sailed through the air, landing at Teyla’s feet. She glanced back at the village with a sigh. “I should go and check on my friends. They may be worried.”
Nesto snorted. “They won’t even notice you’re gone.”
“Indeed?” Teyla looked down at him, eyebrows raised. “And why is that?”
He kicked the plant again. “When people come to trade, my father feeds them lots of these. Then they get all silly and agree to give us stuff.”
Teyla frowned. She lowered herself to one knee, and picked up the broken leaf. A sticky green juice leaked out from the crushed stem onto her hand. Raising her hand to her face, she sniffed. There was a sweet odor, and at the same time she felt a faint wave of dizziness.
She quickly rubbed the sap off onto her fatigue pants and stood. “Does this plant contain some sort of drug?” she demanded.
“Drug?” Nesto stared at her blankly.
“Never mind.” Teyla pushed the remains of the leaf into her pants pocket and began walking swiftly back toward the hut.
Bursting through the entrance, she stopped and stared in dismay.
Sheppard was standing on the low table, bouncing unsteadily up and down and flapping his arms in what she could only guess was the imitation of some sort of bird. McKay was stretched out with his head buried in his arms, and Ronon was busy finishing the rest of the food left on the scientist’s plate.
Ardino sat cross-legged on his cushion, a placid smile on his face as he watched.
“And then the roof opens, and the jumper goes up, up, up….” Sheppard jumped to illustrate, landed at the edge of the table, and fell over Ronon, leaving a bunch of greens from McKay’s upended plate in the runner’s hair.
“See, I told you,” Nesto’s voice made Teyla turn just for a second. The boy had followed her, and was shaking his head. “Silly.”
“How many of these ‘jumpers’ do you have?” Asked Ardino.
“Oh lotsh and lotsh,” slurred Sheppard from the floor.
“Colonel Sheppard,” Teyla snapped, in her best leader-like voice. “What do you think you are doing?”
“Um,” Sheppard looked up at her, and blinked confusedly. “Trading.”
Ardino’s smile faded, and he stood, backing to the wall with a wary look. “Your friend was simply telling me…”
“I heard what he was telling you,” Teyla interrupted. “And it will stop now.”
“But,” Sheppard was trying to stand up now, pulling himself against the table. “I didn’t get to the cool part yet.”
Teyla took a deep breath and blew out sharply from her cheeks. The smoke was starting to make her dizzy again. “Enough,” she said. Grasping Sheppard by the arm, she hauled him to his feet and gave him a shove through the door.
She turned to her other two teammates. Ronon had stopped eating and was staring at her through heavily lidded eyes. McKay hadn’t moved. “We are leaving,” she said to Ronon. Leaning down, she shook McKay’s shoulder.
The scientist groaned. She shook him again. “Go ‘way,” he mumbled.
“McKay,” she said. “Get up. We are leaving.”
“Teyla?” McKay tilted his head and squinted at her. “I don’t feel good,” he said. His eyes rolled back in his head. Teyla sighed.
She grasped him under the arms and dragged him outside the hut. Sheppard lay in a heap on the ground and she deposited McKay next to him.
“Colonel Sheppard.” She shook the team leader’s shoulder. He groaned, making no attempt to move. Draping his arm across her shoulders, she managed to get him at least partially to his feet.
She turned enough to see that Ronon had followed her out of the hut and was still watching her. “Bring him,” she ordered through gritted teeth, indicating McKay with her head.
Grunting heavily, the Satedan slung McKay over his shoulder, and staggered after her as she dragged Sheppard toward the gate. By the time she reached the DHD, Teyla’s shoulder was burning. She lowered Sheppard to the ground as gently as her overextended muscles would allow, and he responded by rolling over and starting to snore.
With a dull thud, McKay landed next to Sheppard. Teyla turned to see Ronon stumbling a few feet away from her before dropping to his knees and starting to vomit.
Teyla looked around at her three indisposed teammates and sighed. There was no way she’d be able to get them all through the gate by herself.
“Perhaps I can help?” Ardino had followed them and was bobbing around her obsequiously, Nesto at his heels.
“You have done quite enough,” Teyla told him coldly. She punched in the address for Atlantis on the DHD, leaning forward over it to block the sequence from the eyes of the others.
Once the wormhole was established, she tapped her radio. “This is Teyla Emmagen,” she said. “I require assistance.”
“Teyla?” Dr Weir’s anxious voice answered immediately. “What’s happened? Where is Colonel Sheppard?”
Teyla looked down and nudged the colonel with her foot. He mumbled something and then went back to snoring. “He is here, but unable to speak at present,” she said. “If you would send Doctor Beckett, and,” she glanced at McKay and Ronon, “two or three of the stronger marines, that will be sufficient. Teyla out.”
The wormhole vanished, leaving them staring through the empty ring at the trees on the other side. There was nothing to do but wait. Teyla sat cross legged on the ground between her teammates, and waited.
Nesto squatted down a few feet from her. His father remained standing, hovering behind him. Teyla ignored them both.
Right on schedule the wormhole burst back to life, spitting out Doctor Beckett, Major Lorne, and as requested three marines. Beckett ran immediately to McKay, dropping to his knees beside him. Lorne deposited the doctor’s usual monstrosity of an off world bag next to him, and turned to Teyla with a confused look.
“Teyla? What’s going on?”
“It is a long story, Major,” she answered, with a sigh. “I will dial, if you will help with the others.”
“Okay.” Eyeing Ardino, who was still hovering close by and watching the proceedings with interest, Lorne ran a hand down the length of his rifle. “This guy?”
“Is of no consequence,” Teyla said firmly.
“Right.” Lorne waved the marines toward Beckett. He walked over to Ronon, and clapped the Satedan on the shoulder. Ronon mumbled something and Lorne bent down and pulled his arm across his shoulder, hauling him awkwardly to his feet.
“Whenever you’re ready,” the major gasped at Teyla. She punched in the address and the gate whooshed to life.
At Beckett’s direction, the marines hefted McKay and Sheppard onto the waiting gurneys. The doctor turned to Teyla. “You’re certain this insa contagious?” he asked, his brow furrowed and eyes widened in what she had heard McKay call his ‘worried sheep’ look.
“Quite certain.” Teyla moved to help Lorne with Ronon, supporting her teammate’s other side. “This was caused by a plant. I have obtained a sample for you.” She aimed her GDO at the wormhole with her free hand.
“Well, all right.” Beckett did not look convinced, but he waved the marines toward the gate with the gurneys. “I guess we’ll be finding out when the city locks down,” he muttered under his breath.
Lorne gave her a sympathetic glance while blowing one of Ronon’s dreads off his face. Ignoring the doctor’s comments, they followed the marines through the gate.
~^~^~^~
Teyla sat on one of the cots in the outermost parts of the infirmary, holding her fingers over the bandage covering the fold of her arm where a nurse had just drawn what Teyla thought was an inordinate amount of blood.
While being examined, she had explained the day’s events to Weir, and tried to ignore the sounds coming from the curtained areas deeper in the infirmary, where her teammates were being subjected to even more thorough examinations.
“I’m curious Teyla,” Weir said. “Why didn’t you eat the food the others ate?”
Teyla sighed. She did not like to discuss physical issues with the others. “It was the coffee,” she answered.
“The...coffee?” Weir’s eyebrows arched.
“It did not… agree with me.”
“Okay.” Weir looked like she was about to ask more questions, but Teyla was saved by the flurried arrival of Doctor Beckett.
“Your tests are all fine, love,” he said to Teyla, squinting down at the clipboard he was carrying. “You can go.”
Teyla stayed seated on the bed. “What about,” she nodded toward the curtain.
“The boys,” Weir finished with a wry smile.
Beckett sighed. He put his clipboard down on the bed and shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his lab coat. “You were right,” he said. “The wee leaf you brought me contained a high dose of an intoxicant. Unfortunately it seems to really like the ATA gene, and also has a mild hallucinogenic effect.”
“Ronon doesn’t have the ATA gene,” Weir pointed out.
“No,” Beckett shook his head. “He’s just sleeping it off. The other two…” the doctor looked towards the curtain and sighed again. “I’d sedate them, but I’m afraid that might interact the wrong way with the drug they’ve already got.”
“May we see them?” Teyla asked.
“If you really want to,” Beckett shrugged. “But don’t say I didn’t warn you,” he added.
Weir and Teyla looked at each other. Teyla slid down off of the cot and nodded for Elizabeth to precede her. Pushing aside the curtain, they found Ronon lying on his side; face half obscured by his hair, snoring peacefully.
Sheppard and McKay both lay on their backs staring at the ceiling. Seeing Teyla, Sheppard waved. “There she is,” he slurred to McKay.
“Our hero,” McKay responded, grinning stupidly at her.
“Your hero?” Weir asked, eyebrows raised.
“She saved our lives.” Sheppard sighed.
“She was flying,” McKay nodded. “Like Xena.”
“Xena doesn’t fly.” Weir crossed her arms. “Does she?” she asked Beckett.
“Oh I’d say it was these lads doing the flying,” the doctor muttered, rolling his eyes.
“She was, she was,” McKay protested. “She was like three feet off the ground, at least!”
“Just like in that Xena episode,” Sheppard continued. “You know, the one where….,” he waved his hands around vaguely in the air.
“Yeah, that one.” McKay sank back into his pillows, his grin broadening. “She was amazing.”
“Air Teyla,” Sheppard agreed. He gazed at her adoringly.
Feeling the heat rise to her face, Teyla stepped back toward the curtain. There was obviously no use in arguing with them, and she could tell by the grin on Elizabeth’s face, that the leader of Atlantis was enjoying herself. The only thing to do was to make her escape.
Slipping out of the infirmary, she ran right into Major Lorne. Catching her by the arm, Lorne steadied her with a grin. “Hey Teyla,” he said. “I hear you can fly.”
“Good night, Major,” Teyla said coldly, pulling her arm free. She walked as quickly as she could down the hall, the major’s laughter echoing in her ears.
Turning the corner she paused, and thought for a second before choosing a different direction. She needed to regain some sort of control, and an idea was forming in her mind.
She stepped through the doorway of the lab, finding as she had expected a lone, bespectacled occupant.
“Doctor Zelenka,” Teyla said politely, “may I speak with you?”
Zelenka started, jerking his chair into a pivot and spilling a sheaf of papers in the process. “Teyla, um, yes, of course, certainly,” he stammered, pushing his glasses back onto the bridge of his nose with one hand and clutching what papers he’d managed to catch with the other.
Teyla perched on the stool across from him and Zelenka gave her a shy smile. “I go to visit Rodney earlier,” he said.
“Please,” Teyla held up a hand. “Do not start that as well.”
“Sorry,” Zelenka put down his papers and cleared his throat. “What may I do for you?”
“Is it true that tomorrow is the last transmission to the Daedalus before they leave earth?”
“Yes,” Zelenka nodded. “With Rodney in infirmary I will handle the transmission. Along with the rest of his work,” he muttered in an aside. “Is there something you need?”
Teyla smiled.
~^~^~
Three weeks later….
Teyla took a long sip of her tea and leaned back in her chair with a contented sigh, cradling the warm mug in her hands.
A commotion was beginning at the other end of the mess hall, and she rocked forward, listening.
“What?” came Rodney McKay’s incredulous voice, raised to a high pitched whine. “You can’t be serious!”
“I’m sorry, sir,” Sergeant Sanchez replied in what was probably meant to be a soothing tone. “There was no coffee on the Daedalus’ last cargo manifest, only tea.”
“But, but, but, it will be at least a month before the Daedalus returns!” McKay was practically sobbing now.
“If you put four bags of green tea in your cup with boiling water, and brew it for, oh, ten, fifteen minutes, it should give you the caffeine you’re used to,” Sanchez said comfortingly. “Id recommend sweetening it with lemon, oops, sorry, perhaps a little honey…”
McKay’s voice dissolved into a string of curses, some of which Teyla had not yet learned. She murmured them to herself, resolving to ask Sheppard later what they meant.
She took another long slow sip of tea, and smiled.
~the end~
Author: Alasse
Category: gen
Rating: K+
Summary: Teyla puts up with a lot from the boys. But girls always win in the end…
A/N: apologies to J.K. Rowling for the title. Many thanks as always to the yahell gang, Dee, Aniko, Yllek and Em for suggestions, corrections and encouragement.
This is for the Teyla ficathon on teylafen. Blending of two requests - Teyla being mischievous and Teyla using her ‘super powers’.
Teyla Emmagen knew from the start it would be a bad day. First she woke at her customary 4 AM with a kink in her neck and an aching head. Then she twisted her ankle in her morning sparring with Ronon. He’d gallantly offered to carry her to infirmary, an indignity she refused. Waving him off on his morning run with Sheppard, she limped instead to the mess hall.
She took a plate of fruit and toast, and a mug for her morning tea, only to discover that there was no tea.
“Sorry, ma’am,” Sgt Enrique Sanchez, the marine on breakfast duty that morning apologized. “Dr. Weir was pretty upset too when she found out the green tea was gone. If you ask me,” he lowered his voice. “Dr. McKay hacked into the last supply order and exchanged the tea order for coffee. We’ve got at least a ton of beans back there,” he indicated the kitchen behind him. “Why don’t you try some coffee? I can add some hot water if it’s too strong.”
Teyla set her mouth in a firm line, and nodded politely at the chubby marine, who filled her cup with the steaming black brew. She eyed it doubtfully as she made her way to a table in the nearly empty room. The strong Athosian tea she was used to had been gone for months, and would it be much longer before there was more, as her people were having trouble getting those plants to thrive in the soil of the mainland.
Dr Weir had introduced her to a variety of earth teas, which while not quite as good, she was becoming used to. Along with Weir she preferred the green tea with its light taste. However, Dr. Weir drank coffee as well, so Teyla lifted the cup and took a cautious sip.
She nearly gagged as the bitter liquid scalded her throat. Putting down the mug quickly, she stared at it in horror. She stabbed a piece of fruit with her fork and ate it almost without chewing, trying to erase the taste of the coffee.
“Try it with some milk and sugar.” She looked up to see that Sgt Sanchez had come over to her with a handful of little packets. She raised an eyebrow questioningly.
“International Delight,” he said, spreading out a series of little cups. “Vanilla, hazelnut, Irish crème. Or just plain half and half. Sugar, Splenda, Equal,” He continued, laying down several white, yellow and blue packets.
Teyla frowned uncertainly. “Which is best?” she asked.
“Well personally I like the Irish crème,” Sanchez said with a grin. “And we’ll put in some sugar to make sure it’s sweet enough.” He poured and stirred until the coffee was a light creamy brown. “Now try.”
She took a small sip. Now instead of bitter the coffee was syrupy sweet. “Better,” she managed, with a smile at Sanchez, who grinned back. She waited till he’d returned to his post before putting the mug back down with a sigh.
“Someone’s got a crush on you.”
She looked up as Dr. Rodney McKay slid into the chair across from her. He placed his large metal mug on the table and yawned widely. McKay scorned the mess hall mugs as ‘shot glasses’ and always brought his own.
“A… crush?” She repeated.
“Enrique Iglesias there,” McKay waved in Sanchez’ direction. “You make his day just by showing up for breakfast.”
“His name is Sanchez,” she corrected him.
“Whatever.” McKay took a long drag of his coffee and sighed contentedly.
Teyla’s eyes narrowed as she watched McKay drink his coffee. “Rodney,” she said. “What does it mean to ‘hack into’ something?”
McKay nearly choked on his coffee, recovered, and swallowed before clearing his throat. “Hack into? Where did you hear that?”
“In conversation,” Teyla answered vaguely.
“I see,” leaning back into his chair McKay began to explain, “Hack is a computer term for ignoring all the normal measures of accessing information, in effect bypassing all normal security protocols and firewalls…”
“Firewalls,” Teyla repeated frowning. She could see how fire would be harmful to the computers, but…
“Never mind,” McKay sighed and took another long drag of coffee. “Let me see if I can use an illustration you’ll understand.” There was more than a trace of condescension in his voice.
“Say you go on the offensive against an opponent you’re pretty sure you can’t defeat, at least not physically. Instead of using a frontal assault, you’d try other methods, to get past their defenses, right? Unless you’re Ronon,” he mused. “He’d just attack anyway for the hell of it…”
“Rodney.”
“Right, focus.” He took another drink. “So you need to find another way to get past their defenses. And in my world, where we don’t always fight with physical strength but our brains, if some information is protected, then we…”
“Find another way to enter.”
“In simplistic terms, yeah.” McKay shrugged and upended the cup, pouring the last drop of coffee onto his tongue.
“I understand,” Teyla said thoughtfully, taking another sip of her own coffee and quickly putting the cup back down with a grimace.
“I’m sure you do.” McKay patted her on the arm and stood. “I need a refill. See you at the gate.”
~^~^~
By the time Teyla had gathered her gear and made her way to the gate room for their mission, her stomach was beginning to churn. Wishing she hadn’t forced herself to finish the coffee rather than waste food, she pushed down the feelings of discomfort and nodded a polite greeting to her teammates and Dr. Weir.
Colonel Sheppard and Dr. McKay were engaged in their usual verbal sparring over the name of the planet to be visited.
“Oxtail,” attempted Sheppard.
McKay rolled his eyes. “Can you please keep your mind off your stomach for two minutes? This is a planet, not a soup.”
“Oh, look who’s talking,” Sheppard shot back. “Mister ‘we’ve been here a whole five minutes, let’s break out the emergency rations’.”
Teyla sighed and exchanged a glance with Ronon, who arched an amused eyebrow in response.
“We’re going to yet another primitive planet to barter for vegetables,” McKay continued. “Could we at least get the name right, so we can leave with what we came for instead arrows or other sharp pointy objects imbedded in our backs?”
“Since when have you been concerned about pissing off the natives?” Sheppard asked.
“Since they started shooting at us. And in the interest of getting home as quickly as possible. Look, the name of the planet is Oztfall.”
“Yeah, that’s what I said. Oxtail.”
McKay groaned. “Elizabeth.”
“You have a go,” Weir said, cheerfully ignoring the argument.
The gate opened with its usual splashing sound, and they stepped through, cutting McKay off just as he was about to resume arguing.
They exited the gate into a bright green meadow of grasses and wildflowers, ringed with trees in the distance. Just inside the ring of trees was a small village of wood and straw huts.
“I’ll huff and I’ll puff,” murmured Sheppard, “and I’ll blow your house in.”
Teyla frowned at him. “Why would Colonel Sheppard wish to blow up these homes?” she asked Ronon softly. He shrugged.
“It’s probably an expression,” he said, nodding wisely. “From their box.”
“Whew,” McKay walked out in front of them, fanning himself. “It is hot here, or is it me.”
“It’s you, Rodney,” Sheppard replied. McKay glared at him. “Well you saw the MALP said it was over eighty degrees, so why did you wear a jacket?”
“Because one of your people programmed the MALP in the very unscientific system of Fahrenheit,” McKay muttered, pulling off the offending jacket and tying it around his waist.
Teyla was wishing for one of her cool skirts herself by the time they crossed the meadow to the village. A child was the first to see them, and ran into the closest hut, squealing. Within seconds people came pouring out of the huts, talking in hushed tones and staring at the visitors in awe.
Colonel Sheppard adjusted his sunglasses, put on one of his more charming smiles, and walked forward. “Hi,” he said, giving the people in front of him a wave, “I’m-“
Before he had a chance to continue, the crowd parted to let through a man who was hastily pulling a pale silver cloak across his shoulders. He dropped to his knees before Sheppard, bowing low with his forehead to the ground.
Sheppard stared at him with his mouth open. He turned to McKay, who shrugged. “At least they’re not shooting,” the physicist whispered.
“Perhaps you should say something to him,” Teyla suggested.
The man whipped up his head and sank back onto his heels with his arms spread. “I am sorry,” he said. “I do not wish to offend, only to give the Ancestors the honor that they deserve.”
“Oh,” Sheppard looked at McKay and Teyla again for help. McKay shrugged again.
“Tell him we’re not the Ancestors,” he said.
“We’re not the Ancestors,” Sheppard repeated.
The man smiled. “Please. We have heard the stories. The Ancestors have returned to fight the Wraith. They travel through the ring, carrying weapons such as yours.” He indicated Sheppard’s P90.
Sheppard looked down at his weapon, and back at the man. “McKay,” he hissed.
“I’m out,” McKay said. “Just keep denying everything.”
Teyla sighed. She stepped forward and gave a respectful nod to the man kneeling before them. “I am Teyla,” she said. “I am not an Ancestor, but from Athos, a world destroyed by the wraith. What is your name?”
“I am Ardino,” The man said, rising gracefully to his feet. “I speak for the people here.”
“This is Colonel Sheppard, Dr. McKay, and Ronon.” Teyla indicted her teammates. “It is true that the colonel and doctor are from a world far away. But they are not Ancestors.”
“Far from it,” Ronon muttered. Teyla silenced him with a glare.
“Thank you Teyla,” Sheppard smiled at her and then turned to Ardino. “We had hoped to be able to trade…”
“Of course, of course,” Ardino smiled widely. His voice dropped to barely above a whisper. “We understand your need for secrecy.” He gave them a broad wink, and then his voice resumed normal timbre. “Come, join us for a meal, and we shall discuss what we have to trade.”
He turned and gestured for them to follow him.
“Well,” McKay murmured after a pause. “I guess we’re Ancestors.” He clapped Sheppard on the shoulder. “Lead on, oh One with the Hyperactive Gene.”
Sheppard shot him an annoyed look but fell into step behind Ardino.
“Teyla,” Ronon, bringing up the rear, nudged her shoulder. “You see anything strange about those crops?”
Teyla looked out at the field they were passing. Bordering on the flowery meadow where row after row of dark green leaves. She turned to the other side of the path and saw the same plants, stretching to the trees. “They are all the same,” she answered.
“Guess they eat a lot of lettuce,” McKay said, sounding disappointed.
Ronon frowned. “That’s not lettuce.”
“Oh and you would know from vegetables?” McKay rolled his eyes. “Though,” he added thoughtfully. “You’re right, it looks more like… never mind.”
“Never mind?” Ronon echoed. McKay had turned a delicate shade of red. “Looks like what, McKay?”
“Well, well,” Sheppard looked over his shoulder with an amused glance at his teammate. “Dabbled in a little botany in college, did we McKay?”
“Just once,” McKay muttered. “And I didn’t inhale.”
“Yeah? So this looks like a drug from your world?” Ronon looked a little too interested, Teyla thought, and she gave him a frown to let him know her disapproval.
“It’s called ‘pot’ Ronon,” Sheppard said. “And if you want to try some, I suggest you bug Zelenka. I hear he’s growing some down in that old abandoned lab where he keeps his still.”
Ronon nodded thoughtfully.
“Not that I condone that of course,” Sheppard continued, giving Teyla a wink.
“Of course,” Teyla answered coldly, spreading her frown to include him and McKay.
“Relax, Mom,” Sheppard said. “We promise to behave, don’t we kids?
“Speak for yourself, Dad,” McKay answered.
Ronon just laughed.
Teyla was saved from a response by their arrival at Ardino’s hut. The child that had heralded their presence to the village earlier was waiting for them in the doorway. Through the straw and wood walls came the smells of roasting meat.
Her own stomach twisted as she saw the salivating looks on the faces of her teammates.
“Come in, come in,” Ardino waved them through the doorway that grazed the tops of Sheppard’s and McKay’s heads. Ronon ducked low and still managed to get some straw stuck in his hair.
The hut opened up into a single room. A low wooden table was surrounded by plain cloth cushions on the dirt floor. In the far corner, a fireplace held a large iron pot, and a spit for roasting meat. Ardino seated himself cross-legged on the cushion at the head of the table, and gestured the others to do the same.
Ronon looked around the hut, frowning. “Sheppard,” he said in a low voice. “There’s only one entrance.”
“At ease, Scarecrow,” Sheppard replied. “Have a seat.” He smiled at their host and took the closest cushion. Two giggling girls immediately placed a platter of meat in front of him. The smell of food soon overcame the Satedan’s misgivings, and he followed suit.
McKay sat next to Sheppard, and Teyla lowered herself to the cushion next to Ronon’s, surreptitiously picking the straws out of the nearest of his braids.
A platter of meat was set in front of her. The roasted pink flesh was surrounded by a few scrawny root vegetables, and clumps of the greens they had seen in the fields. Greens were strewn across the top of the meat as well, a wilting garnish.
Teyla poked tentatively at the meat with her knife, and was rewarded by a stream of pink tinged juice. Her stomach flipped and she tasted bile in the back of her throat. Swallowing hard, she looked up quickly. Sheppard and McKay had tucked happily into their food, and Ronon’s was nearly gone. Deep in conversation, Ardino was not looking her way, and the giggling girls had vanished along with the child. Teyla slid her meat onto Ronon’s plate, and assumed an expression of attentiveness.
“This is really good,” McKay said, around a mouthful of meat and greens. “Let’s trade for some of this.”
“All right,” Sheppard smiled at their host. “What do you say, Ardino?” We’ve got…” he waved his hands expansively, “all kinds of stuff.”
The smoke from the cooking fire was making Teyla dizzy as well as nauseas. She excused herself as politely as possible, and escaped through the door. Once outside she stumbled a few paces and leaned against a tree, inhaling deeply. A breeze lifted her hair, drying the cold sweat on the back of her neck. She shivered.
“Are you alright, lady?” Teyla looked down to see the boy from earlier looking up at her worriedly.
“I am fine.” She straightened away from the tree and ran a quick hand through her hair, tucking it behind her ears. “I only wanted to see more of the village. Perhaps you could show me?”
The boy raised his eyebrows doubtfully. “There is not very much to see.”
“Those crops looked interesting,” she said, gesturing toward the fields, and as far away from the smoky hut as she could see.
The boy’s eyebrows climbed higher. He shrugged, in a very earth-like gesture. “If you say so.” He led the way through the small cluster of huts to the fields of green plants.
The further they moved from the hut where the others ate, the clearer Teyla’s head became. Once she was sure she was not going to humiliate herself in front of her new friend by losing the contents of her stomach, she relaxed and enjoyed the feeling of the warm sun on her face.
“My name is Teyla,” she said, looking down. The boy had stopped at the edge of the field, and was hopping on one foot, kicking a dark green leaf with the other.
“I am Nesto,” the boy said. “Ardino’s son.”
“Ah,” Teyla smiled. “Then it is very nice to finally make your acquaintance, Nesto.”
The boy shrugged again, and gave the plant a more vicious kick. The top leaf broke off and sailed through the air, landing at Teyla’s feet. She glanced back at the village with a sigh. “I should go and check on my friends. They may be worried.”
Nesto snorted. “They won’t even notice you’re gone.”
“Indeed?” Teyla looked down at him, eyebrows raised. “And why is that?”
He kicked the plant again. “When people come to trade, my father feeds them lots of these. Then they get all silly and agree to give us stuff.”
Teyla frowned. She lowered herself to one knee, and picked up the broken leaf. A sticky green juice leaked out from the crushed stem onto her hand. Raising her hand to her face, she sniffed. There was a sweet odor, and at the same time she felt a faint wave of dizziness.
She quickly rubbed the sap off onto her fatigue pants and stood. “Does this plant contain some sort of drug?” she demanded.
“Drug?” Nesto stared at her blankly.
“Never mind.” Teyla pushed the remains of the leaf into her pants pocket and began walking swiftly back toward the hut.
Bursting through the entrance, she stopped and stared in dismay.
Sheppard was standing on the low table, bouncing unsteadily up and down and flapping his arms in what she could only guess was the imitation of some sort of bird. McKay was stretched out with his head buried in his arms, and Ronon was busy finishing the rest of the food left on the scientist’s plate.
Ardino sat cross-legged on his cushion, a placid smile on his face as he watched.
“And then the roof opens, and the jumper goes up, up, up….” Sheppard jumped to illustrate, landed at the edge of the table, and fell over Ronon, leaving a bunch of greens from McKay’s upended plate in the runner’s hair.
“See, I told you,” Nesto’s voice made Teyla turn just for a second. The boy had followed her, and was shaking his head. “Silly.”
“How many of these ‘jumpers’ do you have?” Asked Ardino.
“Oh lotsh and lotsh,” slurred Sheppard from the floor.
“Colonel Sheppard,” Teyla snapped, in her best leader-like voice. “What do you think you are doing?”
“Um,” Sheppard looked up at her, and blinked confusedly. “Trading.”
Ardino’s smile faded, and he stood, backing to the wall with a wary look. “Your friend was simply telling me…”
“I heard what he was telling you,” Teyla interrupted. “And it will stop now.”
“But,” Sheppard was trying to stand up now, pulling himself against the table. “I didn’t get to the cool part yet.”
Teyla took a deep breath and blew out sharply from her cheeks. The smoke was starting to make her dizzy again. “Enough,” she said. Grasping Sheppard by the arm, she hauled him to his feet and gave him a shove through the door.
She turned to her other two teammates. Ronon had stopped eating and was staring at her through heavily lidded eyes. McKay hadn’t moved. “We are leaving,” she said to Ronon. Leaning down, she shook McKay’s shoulder.
The scientist groaned. She shook him again. “Go ‘way,” he mumbled.
“McKay,” she said. “Get up. We are leaving.”
“Teyla?” McKay tilted his head and squinted at her. “I don’t feel good,” he said. His eyes rolled back in his head. Teyla sighed.
She grasped him under the arms and dragged him outside the hut. Sheppard lay in a heap on the ground and she deposited McKay next to him.
“Colonel Sheppard.” She shook the team leader’s shoulder. He groaned, making no attempt to move. Draping his arm across her shoulders, she managed to get him at least partially to his feet.
She turned enough to see that Ronon had followed her out of the hut and was still watching her. “Bring him,” she ordered through gritted teeth, indicating McKay with her head.
Grunting heavily, the Satedan slung McKay over his shoulder, and staggered after her as she dragged Sheppard toward the gate. By the time she reached the DHD, Teyla’s shoulder was burning. She lowered Sheppard to the ground as gently as her overextended muscles would allow, and he responded by rolling over and starting to snore.
With a dull thud, McKay landed next to Sheppard. Teyla turned to see Ronon stumbling a few feet away from her before dropping to his knees and starting to vomit.
Teyla looked around at her three indisposed teammates and sighed. There was no way she’d be able to get them all through the gate by herself.
“Perhaps I can help?” Ardino had followed them and was bobbing around her obsequiously, Nesto at his heels.
“You have done quite enough,” Teyla told him coldly. She punched in the address for Atlantis on the DHD, leaning forward over it to block the sequence from the eyes of the others.
Once the wormhole was established, she tapped her radio. “This is Teyla Emmagen,” she said. “I require assistance.”
“Teyla?” Dr Weir’s anxious voice answered immediately. “What’s happened? Where is Colonel Sheppard?”
Teyla looked down and nudged the colonel with her foot. He mumbled something and then went back to snoring. “He is here, but unable to speak at present,” she said. “If you would send Doctor Beckett, and,” she glanced at McKay and Ronon, “two or three of the stronger marines, that will be sufficient. Teyla out.”
The wormhole vanished, leaving them staring through the empty ring at the trees on the other side. There was nothing to do but wait. Teyla sat cross legged on the ground between her teammates, and waited.
Nesto squatted down a few feet from her. His father remained standing, hovering behind him. Teyla ignored them both.
Right on schedule the wormhole burst back to life, spitting out Doctor Beckett, Major Lorne, and as requested three marines. Beckett ran immediately to McKay, dropping to his knees beside him. Lorne deposited the doctor’s usual monstrosity of an off world bag next to him, and turned to Teyla with a confused look.
“Teyla? What’s going on?”
“It is a long story, Major,” she answered, with a sigh. “I will dial, if you will help with the others.”
“Okay.” Eyeing Ardino, who was still hovering close by and watching the proceedings with interest, Lorne ran a hand down the length of his rifle. “This guy?”
“Is of no consequence,” Teyla said firmly.
“Right.” Lorne waved the marines toward Beckett. He walked over to Ronon, and clapped the Satedan on the shoulder. Ronon mumbled something and Lorne bent down and pulled his arm across his shoulder, hauling him awkwardly to his feet.
“Whenever you’re ready,” the major gasped at Teyla. She punched in the address and the gate whooshed to life.
At Beckett’s direction, the marines hefted McKay and Sheppard onto the waiting gurneys. The doctor turned to Teyla. “You’re certain this insa contagious?” he asked, his brow furrowed and eyes widened in what she had heard McKay call his ‘worried sheep’ look.
“Quite certain.” Teyla moved to help Lorne with Ronon, supporting her teammate’s other side. “This was caused by a plant. I have obtained a sample for you.” She aimed her GDO at the wormhole with her free hand.
“Well, all right.” Beckett did not look convinced, but he waved the marines toward the gate with the gurneys. “I guess we’ll be finding out when the city locks down,” he muttered under his breath.
Lorne gave her a sympathetic glance while blowing one of Ronon’s dreads off his face. Ignoring the doctor’s comments, they followed the marines through the gate.
~^~^~^~
Teyla sat on one of the cots in the outermost parts of the infirmary, holding her fingers over the bandage covering the fold of her arm where a nurse had just drawn what Teyla thought was an inordinate amount of blood.
While being examined, she had explained the day’s events to Weir, and tried to ignore the sounds coming from the curtained areas deeper in the infirmary, where her teammates were being subjected to even more thorough examinations.
“I’m curious Teyla,” Weir said. “Why didn’t you eat the food the others ate?”
Teyla sighed. She did not like to discuss physical issues with the others. “It was the coffee,” she answered.
“The...coffee?” Weir’s eyebrows arched.
“It did not… agree with me.”
“Okay.” Weir looked like she was about to ask more questions, but Teyla was saved by the flurried arrival of Doctor Beckett.
“Your tests are all fine, love,” he said to Teyla, squinting down at the clipboard he was carrying. “You can go.”
Teyla stayed seated on the bed. “What about,” she nodded toward the curtain.
“The boys,” Weir finished with a wry smile.
Beckett sighed. He put his clipboard down on the bed and shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his lab coat. “You were right,” he said. “The wee leaf you brought me contained a high dose of an intoxicant. Unfortunately it seems to really like the ATA gene, and also has a mild hallucinogenic effect.”
“Ronon doesn’t have the ATA gene,” Weir pointed out.
“No,” Beckett shook his head. “He’s just sleeping it off. The other two…” the doctor looked towards the curtain and sighed again. “I’d sedate them, but I’m afraid that might interact the wrong way with the drug they’ve already got.”
“May we see them?” Teyla asked.
“If you really want to,” Beckett shrugged. “But don’t say I didn’t warn you,” he added.
Weir and Teyla looked at each other. Teyla slid down off of the cot and nodded for Elizabeth to precede her. Pushing aside the curtain, they found Ronon lying on his side; face half obscured by his hair, snoring peacefully.
Sheppard and McKay both lay on their backs staring at the ceiling. Seeing Teyla, Sheppard waved. “There she is,” he slurred to McKay.
“Our hero,” McKay responded, grinning stupidly at her.
“Your hero?” Weir asked, eyebrows raised.
“She saved our lives.” Sheppard sighed.
“She was flying,” McKay nodded. “Like Xena.”
“Xena doesn’t fly.” Weir crossed her arms. “Does she?” she asked Beckett.
“Oh I’d say it was these lads doing the flying,” the doctor muttered, rolling his eyes.
“She was, she was,” McKay protested. “She was like three feet off the ground, at least!”
“Just like in that Xena episode,” Sheppard continued. “You know, the one where….,” he waved his hands around vaguely in the air.
“Yeah, that one.” McKay sank back into his pillows, his grin broadening. “She was amazing.”
“Air Teyla,” Sheppard agreed. He gazed at her adoringly.
Feeling the heat rise to her face, Teyla stepped back toward the curtain. There was obviously no use in arguing with them, and she could tell by the grin on Elizabeth’s face, that the leader of Atlantis was enjoying herself. The only thing to do was to make her escape.
Slipping out of the infirmary, she ran right into Major Lorne. Catching her by the arm, Lorne steadied her with a grin. “Hey Teyla,” he said. “I hear you can fly.”
“Good night, Major,” Teyla said coldly, pulling her arm free. She walked as quickly as she could down the hall, the major’s laughter echoing in her ears.
Turning the corner she paused, and thought for a second before choosing a different direction. She needed to regain some sort of control, and an idea was forming in her mind.
She stepped through the doorway of the lab, finding as she had expected a lone, bespectacled occupant.
“Doctor Zelenka,” Teyla said politely, “may I speak with you?”
Zelenka started, jerking his chair into a pivot and spilling a sheaf of papers in the process. “Teyla, um, yes, of course, certainly,” he stammered, pushing his glasses back onto the bridge of his nose with one hand and clutching what papers he’d managed to catch with the other.
Teyla perched on the stool across from him and Zelenka gave her a shy smile. “I go to visit Rodney earlier,” he said.
“Please,” Teyla held up a hand. “Do not start that as well.”
“Sorry,” Zelenka put down his papers and cleared his throat. “What may I do for you?”
“Is it true that tomorrow is the last transmission to the Daedalus before they leave earth?”
“Yes,” Zelenka nodded. “With Rodney in infirmary I will handle the transmission. Along with the rest of his work,” he muttered in an aside. “Is there something you need?”
Teyla smiled.
~^~^~
Three weeks later….
Teyla took a long sip of her tea and leaned back in her chair with a contented sigh, cradling the warm mug in her hands.
A commotion was beginning at the other end of the mess hall, and she rocked forward, listening.
“What?” came Rodney McKay’s incredulous voice, raised to a high pitched whine. “You can’t be serious!”
“I’m sorry, sir,” Sergeant Sanchez replied in what was probably meant to be a soothing tone. “There was no coffee on the Daedalus’ last cargo manifest, only tea.”
“But, but, but, it will be at least a month before the Daedalus returns!” McKay was practically sobbing now.
“If you put four bags of green tea in your cup with boiling water, and brew it for, oh, ten, fifteen minutes, it should give you the caffeine you’re used to,” Sanchez said comfortingly. “Id recommend sweetening it with lemon, oops, sorry, perhaps a little honey…”
McKay’s voice dissolved into a string of curses, some of which Teyla had not yet learned. She murmured them to herself, resolving to ask Sheppard later what they meant.
She took another long slow sip of tea, and smiled.
~the end~