There is the strangest excitement today
If you're awake then you're welcome to hear
I got a gift and it blew me away
From the Far Eastern Sea straight to here
Oh God I feel like I'm in for it now
It's like the rush has gone straight to my brain
Oh God my voice is as lonely as loud
As I whisper the joy of this pain

And suddenly
You've done it all
( Read more... )

 Several opportunities have presented themselves to me in the passed day or two, ones a sure thing, the other is quiet uncertain.   The problem is,  if i take a chance I may end up with nothing,  and if i am able to exploit either of these opportunities I will be letting someone I care about down.  I'm so frustrated right now that its driving me ( Read more... )

Why do you look at me like that?
Why are you always doing it?
Why are you following me?
What do you want from me?
What is it  that you think I have to give?
What are you hoping for?
What are you thinking?
What do you expect to happen?
What do you think of me?
What is this?
What now?
Where do you think we can go?
Where would You like to go?
Would you want me ( Read more... )

 Ok, so my situation really hasn't improved any at all here lately, but I don't wanna talk bout that.

Instead lets try and focus on a few other things for a bit eh.

I recently found myself in another situation, a puzzling  situation that I'm perplexed with. I need to make a choice, I thought I had made that choice, but now find myself to be uncertain ( Read more... )

    If I were my own world, I would have long ago ravaged my lands with consistent war, much the same way I am always at war with myself as I am now.
I seem to be doing this more and more.

I find that I don't enjoy being alone as much as I used to.  That's pretty fucking weird for me, considering my former stance one the matter.  I know why this ( Read more... )

 A little over a year ago I decide to go to a vocational school geared toward the IT field.  I was accepted into the school and was very happy about it then.  I was excited because I was finally doing something with my life, setting a path, planing a future, all that kinda stuff.  This was all very new to an avid underachiever like myself, someone ( Read more... )

Well the game this weekend went ok, not great but ok.   I still had fun, but it felt like I was having on off day,  and it was affecting my playing ability as well,  I simply was not performing as well as I usually I do.  Also we did not play as many games as usual, but I guess thts because some of them ran a little long.  I did manage to get both ( Read more... )

 Well we are planning another  big paintball game this weekend, which looks like it will be my last for some time because of finances.  This of course suck, but there's really nothing I can do about it right now, so I am going to enjoy myself as much as possible this weekend, I'ma shoot hard and fast at every thing that moves with no reserve.

I ( Read more... )

Well I took my Vendor Exam This past Friday and Failed it again too. Only missed it by a couple of points too, which honestly just makes me feel worse about it.  I've been contemplating weather or not to try again,  I want to, but I don't think I'll be able to afford it, also, I don't think I could deal with failing again, should that happen.  This ( Read more... )

A lots happened since my last post, I passed my 70-290  vendor exam and have almost completely finished school, well technically I am done with my classes, but I have yet to "take and pass" the 70-291 vendor exam, this ones a hard bastard, I failed it once already, so my wallets gonna take another big hit on account of that.  So most of my time ( Read more... )