"My Home" Chapter 17/?
Hey everyone. Once again you have my appologies for my cruel cliffy last chapter. I didn't do it to be mean. Honest. I have the next chapter so....Read Enjoy and Review.
Gigi
P.S. Totally unrelated but there is this A/O video that I am in love with. If you haven't seen it you must! It is called "The Untold Story."
LINK TO PREVIOUS CHAPTERS
The journey to the hospital dragged on…akin to the final class before summer vacation. The only difference was instead of excitement the two women were filled with dread. No one spoke. Liv’s eyes were glued to the road, although she didn’t look like she could even see it. Alex was slumped in the passenger seat; taking turns from staring blankly out the window and stealing glances at the woman beside her.
Alex knew what was happening; Olivia was shutting down. She could shoot a cannonball at her only to have it bounce off of the wall that was now keeping her out. Elliot had been there. He was there before her, and was there to pick up the pieces when she was gone. Alex knew it wasn’t sexual; Liv was more likely to go down on Cragen then Elliot. But Alex had to admit she was envious of the emotional connection; something built over years of having each others backs, over risking their lives for each other…that either tears partners apart or glues them together. Eliot and Olivia were an example of the latter.
Elliot knew when to let Liv brood, and when to confront her. Alex was still learning these important distinctions when she was whisked away. And now she felt like she was starting over again. It was like speaking another language after a long break; it was all familiar and yet foreign. She rued the timing…she was just starting to break through. She was beginning to feel like she had before…she was beginning to feel.
She didn’t know any of the details. She didn’t know where Elliot was shot, by whom, and who was supposed to have his back. If it was the frizzy-haired detective, there was going to be trouble. Alex dared not ask Olivia what she knew. She could feel the eggshells cracking under her feet. They finally pulled up to the hospital; Liv jumped out without even a sideways glance. It was alright, Alex wasn’t expecting one.
Liv stormed through the double doors, Alex trailing in her wake. Olivia looked eerily calm. She strutted determinedly up to the front desk, ceasing any peasantries from the secretary with a hard cold look and a badge. As she was getting information from the woman behind the counter, Alex looked around. She hadn’t been to this hospital since she had been shot. She woke up and was told by a balding federal agent that she was dead. Apparently instead of heaven she was headed to hell. The déjà vu was potent, causing Alex’s hands to begin to shake. A gun shot, cold pavement, bright lights…and her life was over.
Alex looked around quickly only to realize that Liv had run off in the direction of the elevator. A lump was building in her throat. She felt faint as the doors closed and Liv pushed for the 3rd floor. That is where she had been taken; Eliot must be in bad shape. Olivia tapped her foot impatiently on the tile floor of the elevator as Alex tried desperately to regulate her breathing. For a detective, Olivia was completely oblivious. Alex chalked it off to extreme emotional distress. She smiled inwardly. Thinking like a lawyer would keep her sane.
The doors opened and they were greeted by a very disturbing and unwelcoming sight. Beck…covered in blood. Eliot’s blood. Alex winced as she foresaw the conflict. True to form Liv stormed up to Beck and dug in her heels. If Alex kept this up she would start wondering if she was clairvoyant. Alex couldn’t hear what they were arguing about over the thumping of her heart. The walls were white; the hall smelt of ammonia and oxidized blood.
Warily she approached the two feuding detectives. When she was a few inches behind Liv she tenderly put a hand on her shoulder. Olivia spun around mid accusation and glared at Alex with a venom and fury she had rarely experienced first hand.
“What? Isn’t it bad enough I had to tend to you for the past month? If you had been stronger I would have been there for him instead of this bimbo.” Alex felt the jibe echo throughout her body, awakening her own temper.
“Oh don’t pin this on me. You think I don’t know? You two were having problems. You weren’t working with each other. Even if you hadn’t been with me, what makes you think he would have wanted you guarding his back?” Alex knew it was cruel, especially under the circumstances, but she couldn’t help it. Liv had hurt her. Validating the fears she had, that she was a burden. A weak unwanted burden. She quickly turned on the balls of her feet and headed back towards the elevator. She was uneasy in the hospital and had to get away from Liv.
Only when she was back out in the rain did she realize that she didn’t have a ride. So she sat. She slumped down against the wall, underneath the ledge of the hospital, effectively evading the rain but not the cold. She wasn’t clairvoyant after all. Although looking back…I guess what they say is true; hindsight is 20/20. Hugging her knees she fought the urge to cry. Growing up she was told crying was weak. She was not to be weak; weakness was unfit for a Cabot. She buried her head in her arms and wished she could disappear. She wished that everything would fade away, the roar of the ambulances and the parade of stretchers. A voice offered her just that,
“Need a lift?” Alex’s eyes shot up at the familiar voice. Beck. What did she have left to lose?
“I have nowhere to go.” Beck paused and looked at Alex pensively. She seemed to be deciding her next move. Alex just kept looking up at her, with no desire to help along the process.
“I know a place.” A place. It didn’t matter where. It would be away from here.
“Sure.”
Gigi
P.S. Totally unrelated but there is this A/O video that I am in love with. If you haven't seen it you must! It is called "The Untold Story."
LINK TO PREVIOUS CHAPTERS
The journey to the hospital dragged on…akin to the final class before summer vacation. The only difference was instead of excitement the two women were filled with dread. No one spoke. Liv’s eyes were glued to the road, although she didn’t look like she could even see it. Alex was slumped in the passenger seat; taking turns from staring blankly out the window and stealing glances at the woman beside her.
Alex knew what was happening; Olivia was shutting down. She could shoot a cannonball at her only to have it bounce off of the wall that was now keeping her out. Elliot had been there. He was there before her, and was there to pick up the pieces when she was gone. Alex knew it wasn’t sexual; Liv was more likely to go down on Cragen then Elliot. But Alex had to admit she was envious of the emotional connection; something built over years of having each others backs, over risking their lives for each other…that either tears partners apart or glues them together. Eliot and Olivia were an example of the latter.
Elliot knew when to let Liv brood, and when to confront her. Alex was still learning these important distinctions when she was whisked away. And now she felt like she was starting over again. It was like speaking another language after a long break; it was all familiar and yet foreign. She rued the timing…she was just starting to break through. She was beginning to feel like she had before…she was beginning to feel.
She didn’t know any of the details. She didn’t know where Elliot was shot, by whom, and who was supposed to have his back. If it was the frizzy-haired detective, there was going to be trouble. Alex dared not ask Olivia what she knew. She could feel the eggshells cracking under her feet. They finally pulled up to the hospital; Liv jumped out without even a sideways glance. It was alright, Alex wasn’t expecting one.
Liv stormed through the double doors, Alex trailing in her wake. Olivia looked eerily calm. She strutted determinedly up to the front desk, ceasing any peasantries from the secretary with a hard cold look and a badge. As she was getting information from the woman behind the counter, Alex looked around. She hadn’t been to this hospital since she had been shot. She woke up and was told by a balding federal agent that she was dead. Apparently instead of heaven she was headed to hell. The déjà vu was potent, causing Alex’s hands to begin to shake. A gun shot, cold pavement, bright lights…and her life was over.
Alex looked around quickly only to realize that Liv had run off in the direction of the elevator. A lump was building in her throat. She felt faint as the doors closed and Liv pushed for the 3rd floor. That is where she had been taken; Eliot must be in bad shape. Olivia tapped her foot impatiently on the tile floor of the elevator as Alex tried desperately to regulate her breathing. For a detective, Olivia was completely oblivious. Alex chalked it off to extreme emotional distress. She smiled inwardly. Thinking like a lawyer would keep her sane.
The doors opened and they were greeted by a very disturbing and unwelcoming sight. Beck…covered in blood. Eliot’s blood. Alex winced as she foresaw the conflict. True to form Liv stormed up to Beck and dug in her heels. If Alex kept this up she would start wondering if she was clairvoyant. Alex couldn’t hear what they were arguing about over the thumping of her heart. The walls were white; the hall smelt of ammonia and oxidized blood.
Warily she approached the two feuding detectives. When she was a few inches behind Liv she tenderly put a hand on her shoulder. Olivia spun around mid accusation and glared at Alex with a venom and fury she had rarely experienced first hand.
“What? Isn’t it bad enough I had to tend to you for the past month? If you had been stronger I would have been there for him instead of this bimbo.” Alex felt the jibe echo throughout her body, awakening her own temper.
“Oh don’t pin this on me. You think I don’t know? You two were having problems. You weren’t working with each other. Even if you hadn’t been with me, what makes you think he would have wanted you guarding his back?” Alex knew it was cruel, especially under the circumstances, but she couldn’t help it. Liv had hurt her. Validating the fears she had, that she was a burden. A weak unwanted burden. She quickly turned on the balls of her feet and headed back towards the elevator. She was uneasy in the hospital and had to get away from Liv.
Only when she was back out in the rain did she realize that she didn’t have a ride. So she sat. She slumped down against the wall, underneath the ledge of the hospital, effectively evading the rain but not the cold. She wasn’t clairvoyant after all. Although looking back…I guess what they say is true; hindsight is 20/20. Hugging her knees she fought the urge to cry. Growing up she was told crying was weak. She was not to be weak; weakness was unfit for a Cabot. She buried her head in her arms and wished she could disappear. She wished that everything would fade away, the roar of the ambulances and the parade of stretchers. A voice offered her just that,
“Need a lift?” Alex’s eyes shot up at the familiar voice. Beck. What did she have left to lose?
“I have nowhere to go.” Beck paused and looked at Alex pensively. She seemed to be deciding her next move. Alex just kept looking up at her, with no desire to help along the process.
“I know a place.” A place. It didn’t matter where. It would be away from here.
“Sure.”