Now i am set free, and i can see right through you...but your too blind to see me.
First of all, do not give me bullshit about how you've had it worse, and this is nothing. This IS something to me. Fuck you.
Something like a month ago, i wrote a letter to my mom. I told her that i hated it when she is drunk. The reason i wrote her the note is that when i confronted her in person, she blew up on me. I wanted to avoid that. I put the note on my keyboard before i left for school. I got home and she was so sorry. I was happy. She told me she would stop drinking, and she was just so sorry. She sounded sincere.
Right when i got home (tonight) i could tell she had had a few. it's something like a sixth sense, telling when she's drunk. Ari was over tonight, after her lacrosse game, and we were having a good time. Watching a movie on my bed...Signs. It didn't matter though, I was with Ari. Eventually she called me down, and she told me to keep the door open, the whole mom thing.
Ari's mom got to my house, and what do you know, my mom asks her if she wants a drink. She does. By now i have told Ari have severely pissed i am...and she can just see it. We go down and wait for them to stop talking. We're having a garage sale tomorrow, and Ari's mom wanted to see what we are selling. I brought out a huge stuffed tiger from the garage that my cousin didn't want anymore. Ari's mom said it would look good in her shop window. I had already seen my mom stumbling and slurring and...all i could do was stare at the bacardi bottle sitting on the counter. What the fuck? just leave it there. good one.
Me and Ari took the tiger out to her car, and we stayed out there...i needed to cool off. we talked for about ten minutes and then her mom came out and they left.
We came back inside and my mom had no idea how furious i was. She asked me if something was wrong, and i said yes. "you're drinking mom, there's bacardi on the counter" we had a short talk about her being drunk, and i think she was shocked because i never voice my problems to her.
The doorbell rang and it was Ari. They had a flat tire. they needed a cigarette lighter to power a tire pump, but that didn't end up working. so i had to pump the tire up with a bike pump. it was easy, because i was so angry.
but while i was starting the car for the pump, my mom was walking around the front of the car, and she gave me the finger. The finger. My mother. I was fucking amazed.
It's hard to say this in lj, and it make perfect sense. but you get it. now i have to wake up at fucking 6 for a garage sale. on a saturday. goodnight.
.alex