drafts folders are funny things
I found a really old fic in my drafts folder; a bounty hunter AU I never finished apparently. It's already over 30k and I'm really thinking about finishing it. Here's an excerpt because it's actually not as bad as I thought and I was kind of amused by this.
**
Blaine was just sitting against a tree, head perched on his knees, when he heard the rustling of leaves to his right and a twig snapping beneath someone's feet. He looked up to see Kurt walk around the car, freezing in his tracks as he saw him.
“You.” He didn't look happy to see him. Not that Blaine had expected it.
“Kurt.” He was on his feet in a matter of seconds, repeating you can do this, you can do this, don't screw it up in his head over and over. “What are you doing here?”
Kurt shook his head. “I could ask you the same question, actually. I thought I made it very clear that you need to leave me alone.”
“But I didn't even come here to find you,” Blaine answered, thinking that it might have sounded cooler and a little more professional if he'd said something along the lines of you didn't really think you could get rid of me that easily, did you? Oh, well. Playing it cool didn't really matter, did it? The five thousand dollars would be his if he brought Kurt in, no matter how dumb he'd sounded doing it.
“Like I said.” Kurt gave him a disdainful look. “Worst bounty hunter ever.”
“I am not,” Blaine insisted, feeling suddenly five years old.
“Well, what do we do now?” Kurt crossed his arms in front of his chest, leaning against the car with one hip. “You must have a plan or something. I'm sure you have it all perfectly planned out, how you are going to overpower me and throw me in the car and deliver me to the authorities so I can face my rightful punishment. You always liked plans and rules, as far as I remember.”
“I'd rather you come with me willingly,” Blaine confessed, making it sound like he didn't want to use force. Actually, what he was worried about were Kurt's arms. He looked... stronger than he'd looked at seventeen. Honestly? He probably couldn't have won a fight against him then. He was one hundred percent sure he'd fail miserably now. Seriously, Kurt's shoulders were broad. It was kind of hot. Except for the fact that he didn't care. Of course.
Kurt seemed to consider it for a moment. “Okay,” he finally said.
Blaine blinked at him, his mind needing a moment to catch up. Because... what? “Okay?” he repeated.
Kurt sighed. “What part of that didn't you understand? Get in the fucking car and let's go. Let's get it over with.”
Blaine studied his face carefully for a moment. Was this a trick of some kind? He'd always been able to read Kurt. But now... he just couldn't tell. Well, it had been a long time ago. He quickly made the decision to go with this for now. It was better than Kurt just disappearing on him again. Whatever he had planned, it would give Blaine a little more time with him... maybe enough time to finally convince Kurt to talk to him.
“All right, all right,” he hurried to say upon seeing the impatient look on Kurt's face. “Let's go.”
He yanked open the driver's side door while Kurt slipped elegantly into the passenger seat. “What changed your mind?” he asked, not really hoping for an answer.
Kurt shrugged. “I'm tired of sleeping on the floor, I guess. In jail, they have beds, at least. Although I hear they're not very comfortable.”
Blaine started the car. “What makes you so sure you'll go to jail? They wouldn't have let you out on bail if they'd thought...”
Kurt laughed, a humorless little laugh that made Blaine's chest constrict a little. “Haven't you heard? I beat up another policeman while I was on the run. This one's still in a coma and will probably never walk again. He fell down a flight of stairs at the Lima City Mall.”
Blaine tried not to gasp too audibly and tried to control the shaking in his hands as he turned the car onto the street. “Kurt, why did you - ”
Kurt made an impatient noise, cutting him off. “I already told you, none of it is true. Never really expected you to believe me, though. I shouldn't be surprised.”
“I do believe you,” Blaine said, finding, a little to his own surprise, that it was true. Okay, so he hadn't seen Kurt in a decade and he knew that people changed. But not like that. The Kurt he'd known - he had been fierce and he hadn't taken any crap from anyone - but he'd also been the gentlest and most caring person Blaine had ever met in his entire life. Kurt had learned to protect himself at an early age - because he'd had to. But Kurt - his Kurt - the Kurt he'd known back then and the Kurt he could still see shining through this tough guy exterior - he'd never intentionally hurt anyone. He was sure of it.
“You don't,” Kurt insisted. “But thanks for saying that. You were always so polite. Must be your private school upbringing.”
“Hey, I went to public school too. With you,” Blaine reminded him.
Kurt snorted. “For a year. And then you were gone.”
“To another public school in Oregon,” Blaine reminded him.
“Let's not talk about this,” Kurt said. “There are better small talk topics than all the disappointments you made me live through. Like, tell me what you have planned for tonight after you've handed me over to the police. Who will just love me after I've beaten up two of their own.”
“But you didn't do it,” Blaine reminded him.
“Blaine.” Kurt looked at him. “They don't know that. They think I did.”
“Yes, but...” Blaine chewed on his lower lip for a while, trying to figure out what the right thing was here. He had a job to do. He really needed the money. And if Kurt hadn't done anything, then someone should be able to prove it, right? But could he just risk it? Kurt was right. Cops didn't react kindly to people who'd beaten the shit out of other cops. He couldn't just give them Kurt, could he? Dammit, he should have asked for a job at the bank. If only he hadn't run into Santana that day.
“No, Blaine,” Kurt went on, “they still think I did all of this, and I have to prove that I didn't. Don't you get that? I know you hate me, but can you at least try to understand what I'm saying?”
“I don't hate you.” Blaine whipped his head around, staring at Kurt. “Why would I hate you?”
“No idea.” Kurt shrugged, seeming almost disinterested. “Because I hate you back?”
“Oh, come on, you don't.” Blaine shook his head. “You're mad at me, a decade after I did something that wasn't my choice to begin with, but you can't really hate me for that, can you?”
Kurt sighed. “Pull over here.”
Blaine hesitated. “What? Why?”
“Because I have to pee, okay?” Kurt sounded a little irritated now and Blaine thought it better not to deny him this, so he pulled over to the side of the road and cut the engine.
“Alright, go,” he said.
Kurt raised his eyebrows, giving him a surprised look. “You're just letting me leave the car completely unsupervised? Aren't you afraid I'll run off or something? God, Blaine, once this is over I must have a serious talk with Frank Lopez about his hiring decisions. You are bad at this.”
“Of course I'm coming with you,” Blaine said, sounding a little pissed off himself now. It wasn't like he hadn't intended it all along. Except, maybe he'd considered for a second letting Kurt go by himself to show him that he trusted him, but that moment was definitely gone now.
“Wonderful,” Kurt announced, opening his door and walking off towards the tree line.
Blaine followed, leaning against a tree a little way off and turning his back when Kurt opened his zipper. He could give him a little privacy, at least.
He was lost in thought, contemplating whether or not he should help Kurt or finish the job or run off to New York again to forget about Kurt and the job, when something cold closed around his left wrist and then his arm was yanked up and he heard a quiet clicking sound.
“What the hell...” He tried to free his arm, but it was caught and whipping his head around he found Kurt, standing close with a satisfied grin on his face glancing up to the pair off handcuffs that firmly tied Blaine's left arm to the tree he was standing under.
“Kurt,” Blaine spat. “Let me go.”
“Nope.” Kurt didn't stop grinning for even a second. “God, Blaine, I almost feel sorry about this. Really. But, you see, the thing is that I had to ditch my car because it was too easy to follow and I'm afraid I'll have to borrow this one now. Tell Finn thanks for me when you see him.” And with that he strode off.
Blaine cursed himself as he remembered he'd left the keys in the ignition. Well, Kurt could have probably hot-wired it anyway.
“Oh, come on, Kurt, this isn't funny,” Blaine yelled after him, but Kurt just waved over his shoulder and kept walking.
“Kurt,” Blaine shouted, yanking on the handcuffs again, but it was no use. The branch was pretty solid. “Kurt, you can't leave me here. I'll freeze to death. I'll die.”
Kurt looked back now. “Oh, don't be such a baby, Blaine,” he called, sounding almost amused. “I'll call Finn from the road and tell him to get you. Just...” he grinned. “Don't expect him before tonight. I'll need a head start.”
And with that he got in the car and drove off.
**
Idk man, I really kind of do want to finish this stupid thing, but there are still some pretty big gaps in the plot. Also I suck at writing crime stuff. I'd have to find a brainstorming buddy. But I'm really really tempted to actually work on this again.
**
Blaine was just sitting against a tree, head perched on his knees, when he heard the rustling of leaves to his right and a twig snapping beneath someone's feet. He looked up to see Kurt walk around the car, freezing in his tracks as he saw him.
“You.” He didn't look happy to see him. Not that Blaine had expected it.
“Kurt.” He was on his feet in a matter of seconds, repeating you can do this, you can do this, don't screw it up in his head over and over. “What are you doing here?”
Kurt shook his head. “I could ask you the same question, actually. I thought I made it very clear that you need to leave me alone.”
“But I didn't even come here to find you,” Blaine answered, thinking that it might have sounded cooler and a little more professional if he'd said something along the lines of you didn't really think you could get rid of me that easily, did you? Oh, well. Playing it cool didn't really matter, did it? The five thousand dollars would be his if he brought Kurt in, no matter how dumb he'd sounded doing it.
“Like I said.” Kurt gave him a disdainful look. “Worst bounty hunter ever.”
“I am not,” Blaine insisted, feeling suddenly five years old.
“Well, what do we do now?” Kurt crossed his arms in front of his chest, leaning against the car with one hip. “You must have a plan or something. I'm sure you have it all perfectly planned out, how you are going to overpower me and throw me in the car and deliver me to the authorities so I can face my rightful punishment. You always liked plans and rules, as far as I remember.”
“I'd rather you come with me willingly,” Blaine confessed, making it sound like he didn't want to use force. Actually, what he was worried about were Kurt's arms. He looked... stronger than he'd looked at seventeen. Honestly? He probably couldn't have won a fight against him then. He was one hundred percent sure he'd fail miserably now. Seriously, Kurt's shoulders were broad. It was kind of hot. Except for the fact that he didn't care. Of course.
Kurt seemed to consider it for a moment. “Okay,” he finally said.
Blaine blinked at him, his mind needing a moment to catch up. Because... what? “Okay?” he repeated.
Kurt sighed. “What part of that didn't you understand? Get in the fucking car and let's go. Let's get it over with.”
Blaine studied his face carefully for a moment. Was this a trick of some kind? He'd always been able to read Kurt. But now... he just couldn't tell. Well, it had been a long time ago. He quickly made the decision to go with this for now. It was better than Kurt just disappearing on him again. Whatever he had planned, it would give Blaine a little more time with him... maybe enough time to finally convince Kurt to talk to him.
“All right, all right,” he hurried to say upon seeing the impatient look on Kurt's face. “Let's go.”
He yanked open the driver's side door while Kurt slipped elegantly into the passenger seat. “What changed your mind?” he asked, not really hoping for an answer.
Kurt shrugged. “I'm tired of sleeping on the floor, I guess. In jail, they have beds, at least. Although I hear they're not very comfortable.”
Blaine started the car. “What makes you so sure you'll go to jail? They wouldn't have let you out on bail if they'd thought...”
Kurt laughed, a humorless little laugh that made Blaine's chest constrict a little. “Haven't you heard? I beat up another policeman while I was on the run. This one's still in a coma and will probably never walk again. He fell down a flight of stairs at the Lima City Mall.”
Blaine tried not to gasp too audibly and tried to control the shaking in his hands as he turned the car onto the street. “Kurt, why did you - ”
Kurt made an impatient noise, cutting him off. “I already told you, none of it is true. Never really expected you to believe me, though. I shouldn't be surprised.”
“I do believe you,” Blaine said, finding, a little to his own surprise, that it was true. Okay, so he hadn't seen Kurt in a decade and he knew that people changed. But not like that. The Kurt he'd known - he had been fierce and he hadn't taken any crap from anyone - but he'd also been the gentlest and most caring person Blaine had ever met in his entire life. Kurt had learned to protect himself at an early age - because he'd had to. But Kurt - his Kurt - the Kurt he'd known back then and the Kurt he could still see shining through this tough guy exterior - he'd never intentionally hurt anyone. He was sure of it.
“You don't,” Kurt insisted. “But thanks for saying that. You were always so polite. Must be your private school upbringing.”
“Hey, I went to public school too. With you,” Blaine reminded him.
Kurt snorted. “For a year. And then you were gone.”
“To another public school in Oregon,” Blaine reminded him.
“Let's not talk about this,” Kurt said. “There are better small talk topics than all the disappointments you made me live through. Like, tell me what you have planned for tonight after you've handed me over to the police. Who will just love me after I've beaten up two of their own.”
“But you didn't do it,” Blaine reminded him.
“Blaine.” Kurt looked at him. “They don't know that. They think I did.”
“Yes, but...” Blaine chewed on his lower lip for a while, trying to figure out what the right thing was here. He had a job to do. He really needed the money. And if Kurt hadn't done anything, then someone should be able to prove it, right? But could he just risk it? Kurt was right. Cops didn't react kindly to people who'd beaten the shit out of other cops. He couldn't just give them Kurt, could he? Dammit, he should have asked for a job at the bank. If only he hadn't run into Santana that day.
“No, Blaine,” Kurt went on, “they still think I did all of this, and I have to prove that I didn't. Don't you get that? I know you hate me, but can you at least try to understand what I'm saying?”
“I don't hate you.” Blaine whipped his head around, staring at Kurt. “Why would I hate you?”
“No idea.” Kurt shrugged, seeming almost disinterested. “Because I hate you back?”
“Oh, come on, you don't.” Blaine shook his head. “You're mad at me, a decade after I did something that wasn't my choice to begin with, but you can't really hate me for that, can you?”
Kurt sighed. “Pull over here.”
Blaine hesitated. “What? Why?”
“Because I have to pee, okay?” Kurt sounded a little irritated now and Blaine thought it better not to deny him this, so he pulled over to the side of the road and cut the engine.
“Alright, go,” he said.
Kurt raised his eyebrows, giving him a surprised look. “You're just letting me leave the car completely unsupervised? Aren't you afraid I'll run off or something? God, Blaine, once this is over I must have a serious talk with Frank Lopez about his hiring decisions. You are bad at this.”
“Of course I'm coming with you,” Blaine said, sounding a little pissed off himself now. It wasn't like he hadn't intended it all along. Except, maybe he'd considered for a second letting Kurt go by himself to show him that he trusted him, but that moment was definitely gone now.
“Wonderful,” Kurt announced, opening his door and walking off towards the tree line.
Blaine followed, leaning against a tree a little way off and turning his back when Kurt opened his zipper. He could give him a little privacy, at least.
He was lost in thought, contemplating whether or not he should help Kurt or finish the job or run off to New York again to forget about Kurt and the job, when something cold closed around his left wrist and then his arm was yanked up and he heard a quiet clicking sound.
“What the hell...” He tried to free his arm, but it was caught and whipping his head around he found Kurt, standing close with a satisfied grin on his face glancing up to the pair off handcuffs that firmly tied Blaine's left arm to the tree he was standing under.
“Kurt,” Blaine spat. “Let me go.”
“Nope.” Kurt didn't stop grinning for even a second. “God, Blaine, I almost feel sorry about this. Really. But, you see, the thing is that I had to ditch my car because it was too easy to follow and I'm afraid I'll have to borrow this one now. Tell Finn thanks for me when you see him.” And with that he strode off.
Blaine cursed himself as he remembered he'd left the keys in the ignition. Well, Kurt could have probably hot-wired it anyway.
“Oh, come on, Kurt, this isn't funny,” Blaine yelled after him, but Kurt just waved over his shoulder and kept walking.
“Kurt,” Blaine shouted, yanking on the handcuffs again, but it was no use. The branch was pretty solid. “Kurt, you can't leave me here. I'll freeze to death. I'll die.”
Kurt looked back now. “Oh, don't be such a baby, Blaine,” he called, sounding almost amused. “I'll call Finn from the road and tell him to get you. Just...” he grinned. “Don't expect him before tonight. I'll need a head start.”
And with that he got in the car and drove off.
**
Idk man, I really kind of do want to finish this stupid thing, but there are still some pretty big gaps in the plot. Also I suck at writing crime stuff. I'd have to find a brainstorming buddy. But I'm really really tempted to actually work on this again.