(no subject)
I'm just gonna
post this here and let people judge me for the terrible person I am.
Becky Woerner: ((Are you okay?)
AL Villarreal: [[I'm better now.]]
Becky Woerner: ((Okay...))
Becky Woerner: ((Why didn't you tell me?))
AL Villarreal: [[Because it was five in the morning and I knew I was being irrational and just needed to sleep.
Becky Woerner: ((I still want to know how you're feeling...))
AL Villarreal: [[I didn't want to scare you for no reason.]]
Becky Woerner: ((But I need to know how you are...
Becky Woerner: ((I'm honestly more scared that you didn't tell me))
AL Villarreal: [[It just came and passed. I slept and was better in the morning. There was nothing to tell.]]
Becky Woerner: ((But what about the recent post on tumblr? That one says it's from today.))
Becky Woerner: ((Meaning Wednesday))
AL Villarreal: [[Yeah, that whole shebang happened about half an hour ago.]]
AL Villarreal: [[And I meant I was trying not to fall into that state again.]]
AL Villarreal: [[I wasn't already there.]]
Becky Woerner: ((You should have said something...))
AL Villarreal: [[I was fine.]]
Becky Woerner: ((I want you to trust me with how you're feeling...))
AL Villarreal: [[I didn't want to worry you with something that would change in the next few minutes.]]
Becky Woerner: ((And I'm not supposed to worry when I see a post by you with all that on it on tumblr?))
AL Villarreal: [[Because it's already passed!]]
Becky Woerner: ((But I saw that without you saying it had passed!))
Becky Woerner: ((So I freaked out!))
Becky Woerner: ((Telling me these things makes it easier!))
AL Villarreal: [[Whenever I do, you start crying!]]
Becky Woerner: ((Well I started crying without you telling me!))
AL Villarreal: [[Sorry, then! I'm sorry I made you cry! I'm sorry I /always/ make you cry!]]
Becky Woerner: ((Don't take it like that...)
AL Villarreal: [[But I do!]]
AL Villarreal: [[Even when I try NOT to make you cry, you cry!]]
Becky Woerner: ((Well I'm sorry for fucking worrying about you))
AL Villarreal: [[I don't WANT you to worry about me! It kills me that you do!]]
Becky Woerner: ((It means that I care! And I /do/!))
AL Villarreal: [[I know that you do, but the fact that I am broken enough that people need to worry about me makes me feel even worse! Which is why I usually don't tell ANYONE I feel the way I do!]]
Becky Woerner: ((I'm sorry, I just))
Becky Woerner: ((I want us to be completely open with each other))
AL Villarreal: [[I hate being open. It leads to people getting hurt.]]
Becky Woerner: ((Babe, we especially need to be open with each other since we're long distance...))
AL Villarreal: [[I need to go to bed.]]
AL Villarreal: [[I have an appointment with my psychiatrist at nine.]]
Becky Woerner: ((Babe...))
Becky Woerner: ((Alright...))
Becky Woerner: ((I love you...))
AL Villarreal: [[I love you, too. Despite what I say and do.]]
Becky Woerner: ((You never make me feel unloved...))
AL Villarreal: [[Love you.]]
Becky Woerner: ((I love you so much..))
AL Villarreal: [[Night.]]
Becky Woerner: ((Goodnight...Sleep well...))
And then I went offline. I didn't wish her a sleep well.
I hate myself.
post this here and let people judge me for the terrible person I am.
Becky Woerner: ((Are you okay?)
AL Villarreal: [[I'm better now.]]
Becky Woerner: ((Okay...))
Becky Woerner: ((Why didn't you tell me?))
AL Villarreal: [[Because it was five in the morning and I knew I was being irrational and just needed to sleep.
Becky Woerner: ((I still want to know how you're feeling...))
AL Villarreal: [[I didn't want to scare you for no reason.]]
Becky Woerner: ((But I need to know how you are...
Becky Woerner: ((I'm honestly more scared that you didn't tell me))
AL Villarreal: [[It just came and passed. I slept and was better in the morning. There was nothing to tell.]]
Becky Woerner: ((But what about the recent post on tumblr? That one says it's from today.))
Becky Woerner: ((Meaning Wednesday))
AL Villarreal: [[Yeah, that whole shebang happened about half an hour ago.]]
AL Villarreal: [[And I meant I was trying not to fall into that state again.]]
AL Villarreal: [[I wasn't already there.]]
Becky Woerner: ((You should have said something...))
AL Villarreal: [[I was fine.]]
Becky Woerner: ((I want you to trust me with how you're feeling...))
AL Villarreal: [[I didn't want to worry you with something that would change in the next few minutes.]]
Becky Woerner: ((And I'm not supposed to worry when I see a post by you with all that on it on tumblr?))
AL Villarreal: [[Because it's already passed!]]
Becky Woerner: ((But I saw that without you saying it had passed!))
Becky Woerner: ((So I freaked out!))
Becky Woerner: ((Telling me these things makes it easier!))
AL Villarreal: [[Whenever I do, you start crying!]]
Becky Woerner: ((Well I started crying without you telling me!))
AL Villarreal: [[Sorry, then! I'm sorry I made you cry! I'm sorry I /always/ make you cry!]]
Becky Woerner: ((Don't take it like that...)
AL Villarreal: [[But I do!]]
AL Villarreal: [[Even when I try NOT to make you cry, you cry!]]
Becky Woerner: ((Well I'm sorry for fucking worrying about you))
AL Villarreal: [[I don't WANT you to worry about me! It kills me that you do!]]
Becky Woerner: ((It means that I care! And I /do/!))
AL Villarreal: [[I know that you do, but the fact that I am broken enough that people need to worry about me makes me feel even worse! Which is why I usually don't tell ANYONE I feel the way I do!]]
Becky Woerner: ((I'm sorry, I just))
Becky Woerner: ((I want us to be completely open with each other))
AL Villarreal: [[I hate being open. It leads to people getting hurt.]]
Becky Woerner: ((Babe, we especially need to be open with each other since we're long distance...))
AL Villarreal: [[I need to go to bed.]]
AL Villarreal: [[I have an appointment with my psychiatrist at nine.]]
Becky Woerner: ((Babe...))
Becky Woerner: ((Alright...))
Becky Woerner: ((I love you...))
AL Villarreal: [[I love you, too. Despite what I say and do.]]
Becky Woerner: ((You never make me feel unloved...))
AL Villarreal: [[Love you.]]
Becky Woerner: ((I love you so much..))
AL Villarreal: [[Night.]]
Becky Woerner: ((Goodnight...Sleep well...))
And then I went offline. I didn't wish her a sleep well.
I hate myself.