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Jun 03, 2019 22:57

Sanji is the king of emotional whiplash, as he is one of the most gender-oriented individuals you could meet. Have the gods blessed you with a shapely figure, a sweet voice, and a pretty face? Oh, then Sanji will abandon his pride and heart in a matter of seconds, complete with the promise of sweet nothings and the most delicious foods a girl could ever ask for. He will swoon, he will coo, he will roll over like a dog and let you wipe your dirty shoes on his face if it will please you. And maybe one of the strangest parts of his personality is that he means all of it. Every. Single. Word. He does not, and will not regret his actions if it means making a lady happy.

It’s in this sense that Sanji’s a true gentleman. For all the perverted, raging hormones only a hot-blooded nineteen-year-old can have, he loves women with the entirety of his heart. They are human, but they are also goddesses that deserve respect and admiration. In turn, he is their servant who will heed their beck and call, fulfill their every whim if they ask it. He is their knight who will protect them if needed, and will not tolerate another man lessening them in any way. He is their prince who respects them, and will treat them like princesses if they let him.

And he’ll do it with a lovesick smile and poetry he pulled out of his ass two seconds ago.

… However, with men, the portrayal he presents is jarringly different, to the point you’d swear it was a different man all-together. Suddenly Sanji is a crass, cussing, hot-headed, chain-smoking bastard who will not take smack for anything. Get in his way and he will kick you through a wall, literally. If he sees women as his glorious rays of sunshine that warm the very center of his being, men are the dirt under his shoes he’s required to put up with. Not to say he can’t get along with someone of the same gender as he - surprisingly enough, he can befriend just about anyone, regardless of their sex - but he’s perfectly willing to let his temper fly in their cases. It’s to them that he’s the demonic chef from hell.

The blatant difference in how he treats the two genders is at least partially due to his strict upbringing. Sanji was taught never to hit a woman. Never. It is a creed that can’t be broken (and he has tried once, when the chips were down). In most cases he takes great pride in his chivalrous tendencies, too. It bleeds into his self-constructed mold on what a gentleman should be, and many a times will show in battle.

But Sanji’s got another side to him, that has nothing to do with gender… usually. Perhaps stronger than his love for women is his love for cooking, and all things related to food. He’s a chef - and a fuckin good one at that. The man is certified to blow your taste buds into orgasmic bliss or just wow the crowd with the eye-candy he creates. Yet even here, his respect and dedication run much deeper than others in his profession. His second creed in life is to never waste a scrap of food, so long as it can be eaten. Being subjected to starvation at the age of ten cemented this eternal appreciation, especially out at sea where Mother Nature is liable to kill or maroon you on a moment’s notice.

As such, he’s deeply sympathetic to anyone who has suffered the same hardship as him, and carries an unorthodox view on customers - if you’re hungry, he will feed you. Background, money, gender, friend or foe.. they all fall to the wayside, irrelevant. His duty as a chef is to provide food to the hungry, and even captain’s orders will not stop him. Because Sanji knows better than anyone what it feels like, when your body starts eating itself out of desperation.

Beyond that, Sanji’s just a very likable individual - blunt and practical, yes, but coupled with boyish enthusiasm. He can be found holding an intelligent conversation with one of his female crew mates… or he might climb up on the table and start dancing with the younger members of his crew. It depends on his mood and what’s going on. When he’s not being stuck on gender, the man likes to take it easy, and really, just encompasses everything his is without any masks or pretenses. Sanji is Sanji, the guy who will playfully joke around one second, kick someone in the head for being and idiot the next, and then finish it all up by cooing at the ladies in his vicinity.

All while making dinner.

BACKGROUND: ((Because there is a LOT of ground to cover (One Piece, why are you so long?), I'll be labeling the arcs for your convenience and my own peace of mind. Also, I'll be skipping anything that doesn't focus on Sanji's character development.))

Early Life:

There once was a man named Gold Roger, who started the golden age of piracy and sent a new wave of pirates in search of the treasure called One Piece.

Ten-year-old Sanji probably didn't give a flying shit about that; it was never his dream to become a pirate. He knew from a young age that he would be a chef, and more than anything, he wanted to find the All Blue - a place where all the Four Blue seas meet, giving birth to an environment capable of holding every type of fish. A sea-faring chef's dream.

That its existence was said to be impossible failed to deter him in the slightest, much to the chagrin of his fellow chefs.

This aside, the greatest hardship of his young life occurred at this age, when "Red Leg" Zeff the pirate attacked the cruise ship Sanji worked on. Fearing for his life (and not realizing the pirates probably had no intentions of killing anyone who cooperated), the boy stole two kitchen knives and defied his captors... and promptly got his ass handed to him by Zeff. His defiance only grew. Sanji shouted he could not die until he found All Blue, tearing up amongst the jeers at the expense of his pride and dream.

And then, the sea decided enough was enough and promptly smashed both ships to smithereens in a storm.

When Sanji awoke, he was with the last person he wanted to see - that shitty ol' geezer, Zeff, the pirate captain. They were both trapped on top of a high rock devoid of any life save a spring of water, and with the edges beaten smooth from the sea. No food. No way down. Zeff stated their only hope was to wait for a ship to pass by. Until then, Sanji would have to make due with a bag filled with five days' worth of food.

But there was another bag Sanji spotted, one much larger than his. After demanding Zeff split the food more evenly, the pirate dismissed him to the other side of the rock - he was an adult, and therefore needed more to sustain himself. Angered by this, Sanji silently threatened to not inform Zeff of any ships that came by. Because plenty would be coming soon, right? Of course. No need to worry.

So Sanji patiently waited. And waited. And waited. Ten days, twenty days, thirty days, two months... The food ran out. Storms came and passed. The moon and sun danced in an endless cycle across the skies. And still Sanji waited as his body ate itself in desperation.

Three months. No sign of a ship. A mockery of a child made of nothing but skin and bones still waited, for either death or salvation. Only then did he remember Zeff and wonder if he was alive. Maybe it's because he was lonely and didn't want to die alone, but whatever the reason, Sanji slowly crawled his way back to the other inhabitant...

And saw the entire bag of food left untouched.

It was the miracle Sanji had prayed for. With one of the kitchen knives from three months prior, he snuck down to the bag, threatening to kill the pirate if he attempted to stop him. The bag was ripped open, and what should spill out? Not food, to Sanji's shock, but gold. Just... gold. Zeff commented sadly on the great irony that they should have enough money to buy a shipload of food, but nowhere to purchase it.

A hysterical Sanji stumbled over to the man and demanded to know why he hadn't told him the truth. What had he been eating for those three months? Had he given the only food to him? And why, to a brat he didn't know?

Because, Zeff told him, making no effort to hide the stump where his right foot used to be, they had the same dream: All Blue.

East Blue Saga:

Fast forward nine years to a ship called the Baratie, a floating restaurant where the staff is made entirely of ex-pirates, led by the owner Zeff and his young protege, Sanji. On a day a bit crazier than usual, some upstarting pirate captain called Luffy smashed into the ship and injured the owner. His punishment? Serve for an entire year as a bus boy. But not only that, the Marine Lieutenant Fullbody dared waste food in front of Sanji. What was his punishment? Getting his ass royally kicked by an irate chef. And that's not even when the real trouble started.

One of the prisoners captured by Fullbody, a pirate named Gin, escaped and demanded to be served despite being penniless. He was immediately tossed out. And he might have died from starvation if Sanji had not approached him later with a plate of food, insisting the man eat regardless of his inability to pay. An odd but sincere friendship was struck between the two of them (witnessed by Luffy and thus subjecting Sanji to the boy's insistent pleas that he join his pirate crew, which the cook quickly refused).

Such an act of kindness backfired when Gin brought his captain, the vicious Don Krieg, to be fed, along with the crew. Knowing the pain of starvation, both Sanji and Zeff agreed to the demands, though at the same time realizing they would have to defend the Baratie from being overtaken by pirates.

While the chefs were easily defeated, ten years under Zeff's instruction had turned Sanji into a fearsome opponent. He easily kicked anyone out of his way and only stopped his tirade when Gin snuck up behind Zeff with a gun. Yet even when ordered to leave the Baratie in exchange for everyone's lives, Sanji steadfastly refused to make the old man surrender another one of his treasures. The geezer had given up his chance to find All Blue by eating his own leg, just so Sanji could survive. And strangely enough, such a speech moved Luffy to violence - he broke part of the Baratie, his reason being that Zeff didn't save Sanji's life just so he could throw it away for a ship.

It was then that Gin took out one of his own men trying to harm Sanji, saying he wanted to be the one to take the chef's life. The two men fought viciously. Unfortunately, an already tired Sanji found himself overpowered. But just before the final blow, he saw the supposedly heartless pirate moved to tears, unable to kill the man who had selflessly given him food and another chance for life. This did not please Don Krieg, who proved to be every inch the unfeeling bastard by firing a poisonous bomb. Once again, Gin spared Sanji's life by giving him his own gas mask, leaving himself to be poisoned.

The ensuing battle between an angered Luffy and Don Krieg sketched itself into Sanji's mind. He watched the younger pirate continue fighting against impossible odds until, to the shock of all, he landed the decisive punch. When Luffy fell into the sea, Sanji immediately jumped in to save the boy, and upon swimming back to the surface with the other in tow, saw a vision of All Blue - the impossible dream he'd put on hold so as to pay his debt to Zeff.

Once Luffy was awake and Don Krieg's crew had retreated, Sanji again refused to join the Straw Hats. At least, before a startling incident: every chef on the Baratie claimed Sanji's soup disgusting. It hurt both Sanji's pride and his feelings... and then he later heard them secretly admitting his food was the best on the ship. They only wanted him to pursue his dream instead of clinging to a debt that never needed to be repaid in the first place, and had hoped to anger him away. That they would go so far became the deciding factor in Sanji finally accepting Luffy's offer to join him as his chef.

It was just before leaving that Sanji got one more surprise. Zeff, who up until that point never showed any outward signs of affection, told Sanji to take care of himself. Such a display moved the young chef to tears, and for the first time in nine years, thanked the man for all he'd sacrificed - his leg, his pride as a pirate, and his dream. The incident ended up moving the entire Baratie to tears as well.

And so, Sanji left the ship on good terms, promising to return one day with his dream fulfilled.

Very soon after, Sanji found himself thrust right into the heart of battle, Straw Hat style. It was the first fight the audience saw him unleash the full extent of his power, as well as his chivalrous fury. Moral of the story? Do not insult a woman in front of him. Just. Don't. Especially not Nami, who Sanji immediately embraced as his nakama and his goddess who he'd do anything for, even after hearing she'd betrayed them. The fishman on the receiving end of Sanji's foot learned that lesson a little too late.

Little Garden Arc:

With their navigator back and Sanji a full-fledged Straw Hat, the crew entered the Grand Line and immediately found themselves caught up in a plot involving the princess of Arabasta - Vivi. She'd infiltrated one of the most dangerous organizations in the the world, Baroque Works, all to protect her waring country. Naturally, Sanji became smitten with such a beauty, so it's good thing the crew agreed to assist her or Sanji might've taken off.

Now, at Little Garden, Sanji asked Zoro to fetch the crew some meat with their supplies running low. What ensued was a wonderful example of male pigheadedness - Zoro agreed, proclaiming Sanji couldn't handle such a task, and the chef took great offense. They squabbled, they argued, they marched off to kill the biggest dinosaurs they could find (yes, dinosaurs). And while on the hunt, Sanji happened upon a building made of wax. Inside he found a ringing Den Den Mushi (their equivalent of a phone), and the resulting chat helped in more ways than one. It was Mr. Zero, Vivi's former boss and the mastermind behind Baroque Works, who Sanji cleverly insisted to that the Straw Hats were all dead. Sanji also managed to snag an Eternal Pose that would lead the crew off Little Garden and to Vivi's home.

A damn good thing he did. Not only did it keep Baroque Works off their tails for a while, they otherwise would have been stuck on Little Garden for a year, and that doesn't make for a very good adventure. After gaining another crew member (an arc I'm going to skip because Sanji did little more than kick ass and prove he will sacrifice himself in a heartbeat to save someone else), they finally reached the country of Arabasta.

Arabasta Arc:

Once again, Sanji proved his endless resourcefulness when he and Chopper were the only ones not captured by Crocodile (Mr. Zero) after reaching Rainbase. Introducing himself as Mr. Prince and pretending to be captured, he lured Crocodile outside his headquarters and had Chopper act as a decoy while he sneaked inside to rescue the crew, and keeping his identity a secret to boot. He later dropped the act when he encountered Mr. 2, a master at Okama Kenpo and user of the Mane Mane fruit. He could turn himself into anyone at will, a fact he exploited to his benefit. It turned out Sanji refused to hit a woman, even if it was only a ruse. But in turn, Sanji realized Bon Clay couldn't use his kenpo in Nami's body, and the knowledge was enough to turn the fight in his favor.

The other Straw Hats were thankfully able to handle their battles, and with Luffy's defeat of Crocodile and a sacrifice from one of Vivi's dear friends, the country of Arabasta was spared a dire future. Vivi decided not to join them in the end - which the Straw Hats respected. But as the end of the arc showed them proudly displaying the symbols of friendship on their right arms, they would always consider her nakama.

Skypeia Arc:

But! Vivi leaving didn't stop the crew from becoming comically depressed. Strangely enough, the void of her departure was filled by another woman - the deadly and mysterious Nico Robin, who used to be Crocodile's right-hand lady. Sanji... didn't really care about the details of her past, and happily welcomed her aboard the ship. As Usopp mentioned to Zoro, he'd been a lost cause from the beginning. A few other events occurred around this time, too, but eventually the crew docked in Skypeia... a sky-full of islands. Yeah, islands in the sky. (Don't ask; just nod and smile.) Sadly, the sky island they happened upon was ruled by an angry god who controlled lightning and manipulated the inhabitants through fear. Also, the Straw Hats hadn't bothered to pay the entrance fee, thus labeling them as criminals. God wasn't too happy about that, and after pissing off the local police, the crew was split up and forced to participate in a ritual on the one piece of island made up of actual earth and not clouds - Upper Yard.

Luffy, Usopp, and Sanji made up one group and set off to find their captured comrades. As they fought through the ordeal of balls (chosen by Luffy because it sounded fun), they found out the hard way that balls are a huge pain in the ass when they expel different types of attacks. Even stranger was the priest in their way, a man who ate the ball-ball fruit. But Sanji then proceeded to kick balls around in typical Sanji fashion. Coupled with Luffy's method of handling things? The ball man didn't stand a chance.

Within a few hours, the three met up with the rest of the crew and decided since they were around, might as well steal whatever gold they came across, stuff it on the ship, and then make off in all their piratey-badass glory. Sanji stayed with Nami and Usopp on the ship, where they were attacked by the God Enel and taken out for the count, leaving Nami to protect them from enemy harm. Enough goes on while they're unconscious - the crew went up against their respective opponents, only to be attacked by Enel at the end (save Nami who decided to go with him); Luffy was eaten by a snake and somehow managed to escape long enough to put the fear of God in... God (rubber > lightning), before being booted off God's flying ship (like I said, just nod and smile); God then was ready to shoot the entirety of Skypeia out of the sky for no reason besides he found it unnatural and was a haughty jerk. But at last Usopp and Sanji woke up, and through the chef's stubborn prompting, launched themselves into the flying arc so as to save Nami from danger.

What happened next was another example of Sanji's all-encompassing self-sacrificing tendencies. To save both Nami and Usopp, he took a direct blast of lightning which very well should have killed him - though not before destroying enough of Enel's arc to hinder the god's progress. The setback only lasted a short moment for Enel, but it was enough for Luffy to finally bounce back and put the lightning bastard in his place. Another win for the Straw Hats.

Water 7/Enies Lobby:

For once, the crew was actually rewarded in their efforts and came into a large sum of money - something that would prove very crucial in this next arc. The truth was their ship, Going Merry, was in need of repairs. So they set out for Water 7, a city made famous by the sea train and shipwrights.

That's when shit proceeded to happen everywhere: Luffy found their ship couldn't be repaired at all, Usopp was robbed and beaten to a bloody pulp by a group known as the Franky Family, and the Straw Hats raised hell upon said family for harming their nakama. When all was said and done, their moment of revenge couldn't stop what happened next. Hearing the money had already been spent, as well as Luffy's decision to abandon the Going Merry, Usopp emotionally snapped and challenged their captain to a duel for rights over the ship.

The finale of the battle reached the obvious outcome - Usopp lost despite putting everything he had in the battle. Luffy gave him the Going Merry anyway, and ordered the crew to move out, leaving their sniper and comrade behind. Not only that, but Robin was missing. It seemed the crew was falling apart. And of course, shit only got worse. The Straw Hats were framed for attempted murder, a huge tide known as "Aqua Laguna" was coming to flood the city, and they didn't even have a ship. Not a good day for anyone. Sanji, though, caught sight of Robin and without a word decided to follow her on board the sea train, unable to believe she'd leave them without good reasons.

He had to fight his way through a couple of train cars (those poor bastards), but eventually Sanji reached one where Franky and Usopp were tied up. The trio (with Usopp pretending to be Sogeking) then finished off the rest before stopped by Robin, who insisted she didn't want to be saved. She'd chosen to give herself up in order to let the Straw Hats sail safe and free, rather than being chased down by the members of CP9 (the government's hell hounds, in a sense).

And being Straw Hats, they fought their way to Enies Lobby anyway, prepared to proclaim war against the World Government.

Just to get her back.

There wouldn't be much of a story if they didn't succeed, but there were two fights worth mentioning in Sanji's case. One was against the beautiful Kalifa, who was Sanji's first lady opponent. The depths of Sanji's code of chivalry was his horrendous downfall - despite proving faster and very much capable of defeating her, he couldn't bring himself to cause her harm. He just won't kick a woman, even if it means dying.

So she wiped the floor with him.

The second fight was his chance at redemption - a male opponent known as Jyabura who he defeated with a new technique. Diable Jambe is the result of Sanji heating one of his legs up to bruising temperatures, adding speed, power, and the attribute of fire to his attacks. So he "spiced" the opponent up, yes. (I know it's a lame pun)

As already hinted, the Straw Hats stole Robin back from the Marines and thanks to Sanji turning a lever to close the Gates of Justice, managed to escape on the Going Merry. Their victory came to a tearful stop when what Luffy was told by the shipwrights rung true - Merry could no longer sail with them. The crew then decided to hold a funeral, burning her while saying their goodbyes.

With new bounties placed on their heads - Sanji got 77 million beris to his name, as well as the nickname "Black Leg" - the crew was forced to leave Water 7 with the Marines hot on their tail. Did Usopp come with them? After a heartfelt apology to the crew, yes, he did. And Franky even joined them, fancy that. +1 shipwright for the Straw Hats.

Thriller Bark:

The next arc has less Sanji running around, and so I'll be skipping to the more important parts. First off, the crew momentarily gained another new crew mate - Brook, the musician skeleton. Yes, skeleton. (Are you nodding and smiling?) He didn't get a chance to stick with them long because of complications, but the group set out for Thriller Bark: a ship that was so large, it looked like an island. There they found ghosts, goblins, zombies, and just about everything out of a comical nightmare. Later they were asked by the ghostly inhabitants to defeat Moria, who stole their shadows. It's more gruesome than it sounds, for anyone without a shadow would burn in sunlight. Brook's refusal to permanently join the crew became clear then - he couldn't sail with no shadow of his own - and Luffy, Zoro, and Sanji all had their shadows stolen, too.

Funny enough, that wasn't what upset Sanji the most. No, that honor went to another incident. Having heard that one of Moria's henchman (a creature who could turn himself invisible due to a devil fruit) had decided to marry Nami...

Sanji exploded into a fit of rage. Literally. The crew was very impressed. Zoro even wondered if he'd evolve.

Suffice to say Absalom (the beast who wanted to wed Nami) did not get very far when faced with Sanji's rage.

Later the crew teamed up against Luffy's shadow and the creature Oars - a GIANT infused with Luffy's mentality thanks to the shadow - and brought him down long enough for the real Luffy to take him out. The cost was high, however. Their exhausted captain, unable to move, became easy pickings for a new opponent named Kuma. But instead of killing off the Straw Hats, he finally agreed to infuse one of the members with Luffy's pain. Sanji volunteered, not wanting Zoro or anyone else to sacrifice their dreams for this, but was knocked out at the last second.

And when he woke up, saw an unconscious Zoro standing bloody but firm. It's not a sight he'll ever forget, and not a secret he'll be willing to share with anyone.

Moria's defeat did lead to reprieve for the crew, at least. The shadows were set free, Brook officially joined their crew, and the Straw Hats went on their merry way to reach Merman Island.

Along the way they actually did meet a mermaid, bringing no little amount of glee on Sanji's end. Sadly, Camie had a bad habit of getting captured. And one of the men who did the capturing resembled Sanji's terribly drawn wanted poster. The hilarity of this issue aside, the matter was resolved when Sanji kicked Duval's face pretty (just nod, just nod), and the crew continued on their journey.

The next island they reached was Sabaody - home of the world nobles where the terrible cycle of slave trade still existed. Not one to bow down to the whims of the rich, Luffy managed to get the crew in trouble (not that they really minded when Camie was once again captured), and the result led to a free-for-all. The Marines swarmed Sabaody, pirates of all types fled for their lives, and the Straw Hats had to fight an army of Kuma cyborgs to stay alive. Just when it looked like they'd be killed, the real Kuma appeared and used his Push Push fruit, sending Zoro away in the blink of an eye. Enraged by the loss of his comrade, Sanji fought hard, but it wasn't enough. Next went Brook. By now Sanji was pissed at his inability to protect his nakama, and even though Luffy screamed for him to stop, Sanji continued to keep fighting until Kuma followed up with Usopp, and then swatted the chef away.

ABILITIES:

Next to each of Sanji's abilities/skills I'll specify between innateness and ones that must be relearned. And in consideration of the latter, I'll also specify if it can be relearned immediately or will take time/a specific memory jog.

Cooking (Immediate Relearning): Sanji is the chef of the Straw Hat crew with good reason. Everything he makes is nothing short of a masterpiece, an art form, with attention paid to every available detail. In the words of Sanji, "First you eat the food with your eyes". And it should be nothing less, as it is his way of life. Canon doesn't depict when Sanji decided to be a chef, but even his dream is associated with food - to find the All Blue, a sea-faring chef's paradise. With so much skill under his belt, it won't take more than sticking him in the kitchen before he starts remembering recipes and techniques left and right. Though considering how MUCH knowledge he has, it'll still take some time before he remembers everything.

Red Leg Style (Immediate Relearning): As a chef, the most important part of Sanji's body are his hands. Can't really make food without them, and to dirty or injure these sacred limbs is a show of insolence and disrespect to future costumers, as well as his craft. So, the solution? Kick ass instead. His teacher, "Red Leg" Zeff, literally pounded all his fighting knowledge into Sanji since he was ten, and it definitely shows. Sanji rightfully takes his place among the Monster Trio of the crew, third only to Zoro and Luffy in terms of raw strength. Since it's so very connected to his profession, pissing him off or sticking him in danger is all that's needed to elicit a memory jog. More difficult abilities will be remembered at a slower pace.

Intelligence (Innate): Among the Straw Hats, Sanji is considered the unofficial strategist. He's usually the one manipulating events behind the scenes to ensure possible escape routes or victories, and it ranges from saving his captured crew mates to ensuring a batshit crazy god doesn't destroy an entire sky-full of islands. To boot, he is shrewd and perceptive, seeing the deeper points of a situation as well as the entire picture, and is not afraid to tell anyone what they need to hear, as opposed to what they want. Not much will escape his notice... at least when he's not busy swooning over his next female conquest, that is.

Sailor Traits (Unlockable): Sanji has lived most of his entire life on the sea, and is a true sailor in every sense of the word. He's a reliable navigator (though nowhere near the skill of Nami), is knowledgeable on all positions on a ship, as well as his way around one. There's also the assumption he would be familiar with sailor-like superstitions and customs. Even though he's debatably more comfortable at sea than on land, these abilities won't be prevalent unless he finds himself on a body of water for an extended period of time.

Random Abilities

- Woman's Measurements (Innate): Sanji can memorize any woman's measurements. Yes. Really. It only takes a glance according to him, and this is how he was able to recognize Robin despite her face being obstructed by a mask.

- Fire (... Innate?): This is both a gag and an actual power Sanji's shown to have - the angrier he gets, the higher the chances he will set himself aflame in a show of fury, bringing new meaning to the saying you shouldn't bite the hand that feeds you. How he manages this is up for debate, and it doesn't seem to affect his surroundings unless he wants things to burn. Since it is specifically tied to Sanji's emotions, I'll go ahead and call this an innate power that will only manifest if Sanji is extremely pissed off.

- Face Reconstruction (Unlockable): As stated in his background, Sanji has the ability to rearrange a person's face structure... with his feet. Truly the most painful type of reconstruction there is, but the results will stun you. He's done this two times in canon, and while I'm sure there will never be a time this power will be relevant in ES, I'm putting it down anyway for the lulz.

+ ooc, + application

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