Liquid Confidence (5/?)
Title:Liquid Confidence
Author: graciepoox0
Pairing:Jack/Rian, Jalex
Rating:Overall NC-17
Summary:You are an example of better things to come, so I'll wait on some other escape.
Disclaimer:I don't own anything, title belongs to You Me At Six.
Notes: at the end
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Alex's heart dropped into his stomach when he saw Jack, and as much as he wanted to say that he was ready for this day, he really fucking wasn't. If he wasn't a wreck earlier, he sure was now. Should he say hi? Should he say anything? God, why was this happening, why did this happen TODAY of all days.
"Alex," Zack called from the opposite side of the car, eyes practially staring into Jack's. They locked eyes with each other for a few moments, before Zack rested his hand on Alex's shoulder. "Come on buddy," Zack's hand gripped around the older boy's bicep, pulling him away from the scene.
It was terrifying, seeing Jack and..him together. It was terrifying, and it made Alex want to throw up. He wasn't ready, as much as he thought he was. Seeing Jack with someone else definitely felt like a slap in the face, and he had no fucking clue how much it would hurt.
Eventually, Zack and Alex were seated in a booth on one end of the building, Jack and Rian not too far from them. The pit that had formed in Alex's stomach grew every time Jack touched the other boy's hand, or leaned in to press his lips to the other boy's lips, or anytime he did anything affectionate. Zack could tell something was wrong with Alex, but there was only so much Jack talk he could take in one day.
"Alex. Order your food, or we're leaving." Zack commanded, looking down at the colorful, laminated sheets of paper down in front of him. His eyes skimmed for a few seconds, before looking up to Alex. "Do I have to do it for you?"
"You might as well," Alex sighed, sitting back on his side of the booth. His fingers ran along the edge of the table, eyes following back to Jack's face. For a moment, Alex wondered what the two were talking about. Did they talk about the same things he and Jack used to talk about? Did they do the same things they used to do? God, he missed him. This was worse then the day they actually broke up.
"Alex, look." Zack set down his menu, causing Alex's attention to turn back to him. "Go talk to him. Make him explain things. Do something, but please, for the love of God, stop moping and sulking around because of the kid. You deserve better, alright?" Zack's eyes locked onto Alex's before he finally broke his gaze when the waitress came back with their drinks.
"Order for me, I have to use the bathroom." Alex slid himself out of the booth, walking straight past Jack and into the bathroom doors. If this was going to go the way Alex had hoped, Jack would walk in behind him, confess everything, and maybe, Alex would feel a bit better. But that's only if Jack had actually stopped sucking face for three minutes.
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Jack felt the cool breeze brush against his scruffy cheek, causing his lips to tear apart from Rian's. His eyes followed the body that brushed past his arm, taking note of the caramel colored hair. Sighing to himself, Jack pushed his lips to Rian's one last time, before slipping out of his side of the booth.
"Where ya going?" Rian asked, resting his elbows along the edge of the table. "The waitress is gonna be here any minute," the older boy pointed out, looking around Jack to see her stopped at Alex and Zack's table.
"Bathroom. If I'm not back in two minutes, order me waffels with vanilla icecream, kay?" Jack smiled slightly, and slipped away to the bathroom doors after recieving a nod from Rian. This was it. Jack was going to finally talk to Alex, and hell, he was nervous. He knew what he wanted to say, he just didn't know how, or what he should say first. Walking through the swinging door, Jack stopped in his tracks when he saw the older boy resting up against the wall. "Uh, h-hey, Alex." Jack tried to smile as he released the door and finally stepped into the bathroom all the way.
"Hi."
"How've you been?" Small talk, that's always a good way to start a conversation, right?
"Great." Or not. God, was Alex really going to be this difficult? I mean, I know Jack broke his heart, but was he really going to play the one word game?
"That's good.. Look, Alex?" Jack turned to face the older boy, leaning his shoulder against the cold tile wall. "Alex, I'm really sorry."
"I'm sure." Alex stepped away, walking up to the sinks. Turning the faucet on, he ran his hands underneath the cold water, in hopes of calming his nerves.
"Alex listen to me, please. Hell, you don't even have to do that. Just at least let me explain." Jack pleaded, walking up slowly to where the brunette was standing.
"Explain what, exactly? How you left me, with no reason or explanation or anything? Or how you end up seeing someone else only a month after the break up? That's kind of low, Jack. Even for you. I figured it would have at least taken you two or three, but a month? Come on, Jack. Do you really think that's fair to me? Do you? Do you think it's fair that I sat around and waited for you to call me, or text me, or at least acknowledge my existence, and got nothing in return? Do you? I mean...God Jack, I don't know what I did wrong. Please, just fucking tell me so I don't have to keep sulking and having pity parties for myself." Alex finally turned to face Jack at this point, his voice thick of hurtfulness and disgust, or that's how Jack took it anyway.
"Alex it wasn't you I promise-"
"Oh the whole 'it's not you, it's me' speech. Really? Is that how you're gonna play it?"
"Will you listen to me? God you're so fucking stubborn, Alex. You want me to explain, don't you?" Jack waited for a reply, only getting a hesitant head nod from the older boy. "Alex, you didn't do anything wrong. You were perfect, alright? It WAS me. I-I wasn't giving you what you wanted, or needed. You know someone else can give you something much better then what I can, Alex." The lanky boy cleared his throat, running a hand over his scratchy, barely there beard.
"How do you know what I wanted, or needed? Don't yo-" Alex started, only to be cut off by Jack.
"Alex, please. I'm not finished. You deserve better then what I gave you, Alex. You do, you and I both know it. I wasn't good enough for you, and that's why I left. I couldn't stick around knowing that you could be much, much happier with someone who wasn't me. I wasn't doing you justice, Alex." Alright, so maybe half of that was true. He didn't plan on mentioning the cheating yet, because well, i just wasn't the right time. Jack wanted to tell Alex, but he was scared, honestly.
"I-I have to go." Alex sighed, pushing past the younger boy.
Jack sighed, leaning back against the cold tile wall again. Hey, he tried, right? Alex could least give him some credit. It was really fucking hard to talk to the older boy, especially now. Jack knew it wasn't going to be easy, and he didn't expect it to be, either. But he did want things to one day go back to normal, if there ever was a normal between the two. They practically jumped into the relationship, so there wasn't much of a friendship to begin with. And it really hurt Jack knowing he wouldn't be able to at least have that with Lex.
Jack hadn't heard the bathroom door open again, mostly because he was so wrapped up in his own thoughts. He did though, hear a sigh that came from across the room. Looking up, Jack saw Rian, hand running over his barely there hair. "Hey, the foods ready." The older boy looked worried, and Jack had understood his reasons. Sighing, Jack walked over to Rian, pushing him back against the wall lightly. "What are you doing?"
Jack didn't answer, instead pushed his lips to Rians, wrapping his arms around the boy's torso. "I love you, Rian."
"I-I love you too." Rian smiled, kissing the younger boy once more before slipping his fingers between Jack's. "Now lets go eat, you need some meat on your bones."
That was the first time either one of them mentioned the word 'love' to each other, and it felt weird to Jack. Weird, but...right. He did love Rian, he must have if he did what he did with him behind Alex's back. But still, saying I love you was a big step in the relationship, and Jack, well Jack didn't know if he was ready for that just yet.
Author's Note:So, I don't know. I was trying to make this a not so awkward meeting between Jack and Alex, but i don't think i did. I don't know. Comments are always welcome. Oh, and if anyone here is in the UK right now, please stay safe<3
Author: graciepoox0
Pairing:Jack/Rian, Jalex
Rating:Overall NC-17
Summary:You are an example of better things to come, so I'll wait on some other escape.
Disclaimer:I don't own anything, title belongs to You Me At Six.
Notes: at the end
Tumblr
Masterpost
Alex's heart dropped into his stomach when he saw Jack, and as much as he wanted to say that he was ready for this day, he really fucking wasn't. If he wasn't a wreck earlier, he sure was now. Should he say hi? Should he say anything? God, why was this happening, why did this happen TODAY of all days.
"Alex," Zack called from the opposite side of the car, eyes practially staring into Jack's. They locked eyes with each other for a few moments, before Zack rested his hand on Alex's shoulder. "Come on buddy," Zack's hand gripped around the older boy's bicep, pulling him away from the scene.
It was terrifying, seeing Jack and..him together. It was terrifying, and it made Alex want to throw up. He wasn't ready, as much as he thought he was. Seeing Jack with someone else definitely felt like a slap in the face, and he had no fucking clue how much it would hurt.
Eventually, Zack and Alex were seated in a booth on one end of the building, Jack and Rian not too far from them. The pit that had formed in Alex's stomach grew every time Jack touched the other boy's hand, or leaned in to press his lips to the other boy's lips, or anytime he did anything affectionate. Zack could tell something was wrong with Alex, but there was only so much Jack talk he could take in one day.
"Alex. Order your food, or we're leaving." Zack commanded, looking down at the colorful, laminated sheets of paper down in front of him. His eyes skimmed for a few seconds, before looking up to Alex. "Do I have to do it for you?"
"You might as well," Alex sighed, sitting back on his side of the booth. His fingers ran along the edge of the table, eyes following back to Jack's face. For a moment, Alex wondered what the two were talking about. Did they talk about the same things he and Jack used to talk about? Did they do the same things they used to do? God, he missed him. This was worse then the day they actually broke up.
"Alex, look." Zack set down his menu, causing Alex's attention to turn back to him. "Go talk to him. Make him explain things. Do something, but please, for the love of God, stop moping and sulking around because of the kid. You deserve better, alright?" Zack's eyes locked onto Alex's before he finally broke his gaze when the waitress came back with their drinks.
"Order for me, I have to use the bathroom." Alex slid himself out of the booth, walking straight past Jack and into the bathroom doors. If this was going to go the way Alex had hoped, Jack would walk in behind him, confess everything, and maybe, Alex would feel a bit better. But that's only if Jack had actually stopped sucking face for three minutes.
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Jack felt the cool breeze brush against his scruffy cheek, causing his lips to tear apart from Rian's. His eyes followed the body that brushed past his arm, taking note of the caramel colored hair. Sighing to himself, Jack pushed his lips to Rian's one last time, before slipping out of his side of the booth.
"Where ya going?" Rian asked, resting his elbows along the edge of the table. "The waitress is gonna be here any minute," the older boy pointed out, looking around Jack to see her stopped at Alex and Zack's table.
"Bathroom. If I'm not back in two minutes, order me waffels with vanilla icecream, kay?" Jack smiled slightly, and slipped away to the bathroom doors after recieving a nod from Rian. This was it. Jack was going to finally talk to Alex, and hell, he was nervous. He knew what he wanted to say, he just didn't know how, or what he should say first. Walking through the swinging door, Jack stopped in his tracks when he saw the older boy resting up against the wall. "Uh, h-hey, Alex." Jack tried to smile as he released the door and finally stepped into the bathroom all the way.
"Hi."
"How've you been?" Small talk, that's always a good way to start a conversation, right?
"Great." Or not. God, was Alex really going to be this difficult? I mean, I know Jack broke his heart, but was he really going to play the one word game?
"That's good.. Look, Alex?" Jack turned to face the older boy, leaning his shoulder against the cold tile wall. "Alex, I'm really sorry."
"I'm sure." Alex stepped away, walking up to the sinks. Turning the faucet on, he ran his hands underneath the cold water, in hopes of calming his nerves.
"Alex listen to me, please. Hell, you don't even have to do that. Just at least let me explain." Jack pleaded, walking up slowly to where the brunette was standing.
"Explain what, exactly? How you left me, with no reason or explanation or anything? Or how you end up seeing someone else only a month after the break up? That's kind of low, Jack. Even for you. I figured it would have at least taken you two or three, but a month? Come on, Jack. Do you really think that's fair to me? Do you? Do you think it's fair that I sat around and waited for you to call me, or text me, or at least acknowledge my existence, and got nothing in return? Do you? I mean...God Jack, I don't know what I did wrong. Please, just fucking tell me so I don't have to keep sulking and having pity parties for myself." Alex finally turned to face Jack at this point, his voice thick of hurtfulness and disgust, or that's how Jack took it anyway.
"Alex it wasn't you I promise-"
"Oh the whole 'it's not you, it's me' speech. Really? Is that how you're gonna play it?"
"Will you listen to me? God you're so fucking stubborn, Alex. You want me to explain, don't you?" Jack waited for a reply, only getting a hesitant head nod from the older boy. "Alex, you didn't do anything wrong. You were perfect, alright? It WAS me. I-I wasn't giving you what you wanted, or needed. You know someone else can give you something much better then what I can, Alex." The lanky boy cleared his throat, running a hand over his scratchy, barely there beard.
"How do you know what I wanted, or needed? Don't yo-" Alex started, only to be cut off by Jack.
"Alex, please. I'm not finished. You deserve better then what I gave you, Alex. You do, you and I both know it. I wasn't good enough for you, and that's why I left. I couldn't stick around knowing that you could be much, much happier with someone who wasn't me. I wasn't doing you justice, Alex." Alright, so maybe half of that was true. He didn't plan on mentioning the cheating yet, because well, i just wasn't the right time. Jack wanted to tell Alex, but he was scared, honestly.
"I-I have to go." Alex sighed, pushing past the younger boy.
Jack sighed, leaning back against the cold tile wall again. Hey, he tried, right? Alex could least give him some credit. It was really fucking hard to talk to the older boy, especially now. Jack knew it wasn't going to be easy, and he didn't expect it to be, either. But he did want things to one day go back to normal, if there ever was a normal between the two. They practically jumped into the relationship, so there wasn't much of a friendship to begin with. And it really hurt Jack knowing he wouldn't be able to at least have that with Lex.
Jack hadn't heard the bathroom door open again, mostly because he was so wrapped up in his own thoughts. He did though, hear a sigh that came from across the room. Looking up, Jack saw Rian, hand running over his barely there hair. "Hey, the foods ready." The older boy looked worried, and Jack had understood his reasons. Sighing, Jack walked over to Rian, pushing him back against the wall lightly. "What are you doing?"
Jack didn't answer, instead pushed his lips to Rians, wrapping his arms around the boy's torso. "I love you, Rian."
"I-I love you too." Rian smiled, kissing the younger boy once more before slipping his fingers between Jack's. "Now lets go eat, you need some meat on your bones."
That was the first time either one of them mentioned the word 'love' to each other, and it felt weird to Jack. Weird, but...right. He did love Rian, he must have if he did what he did with him behind Alex's back. But still, saying I love you was a big step in the relationship, and Jack, well Jack didn't know if he was ready for that just yet.
Author's Note:So, I don't know. I was trying to make this a not so awkward meeting between Jack and Alex, but i don't think i did. I don't know. Comments are always welcome. Oh, and if anyone here is in the UK right now, please stay safe<3