It's been so long since I've written anything meaningful--It's been so long since I've found any kind of meaning in my life ( Read more... )

"I am a sick man.... I am a spiteful man. I am an unattractive man. I believe my liver is diseased. However, I know nothing at all about my disease, and do not know for certain what ails me"

-opening lines from Notes from Underground by Fyodor Dostoevsky

Incase you were wondering..

I drive to work every day screaming the lyrics to some random cd--usually incorrectly.

starshapedatoms: im hungry
russ eX core: such is the life of a vegetarian

intoxication does funny things, like make people honest and (best of all) expressive of their feelings.

you'd never say "i want to kiss you," while sober, but while drunk, you somehow reason that it's ok--allowing yourself to say and express things you normally would have left-- unsaid, undone.

there's a certain je ne sais quoi to intoxicated ( Read more... )

all i can think about is how bad i want a cigarette.
but i'm hanging in strong.

it's officially been 15 minutes since my last cig.

hopelessly,
russ

It seems that when I sleep a lot, reality fades, giving way to fantasy. I'm not sure if fantasy is the appropriate word, though. I see people and I'm surprised-- "I thought you were dead!" I look for the homework I never actually did. And probably worst of all, I haplessly look for that love to embrace me again ( Read more... )

who do you take yourself to be--
do you feel others perceive you that way?

are you clever enough to mislead people about
who you are?

that is, to build a facade on a personal basis, by person.

do you ever hide your true feelings?
if so, why?

who do you take yourself to be to me?
do you wish i took you another way?

the 5th conflict (stage) in psychosocial development in the model by erik erikson is identity vs. role confusion.

description of model:
"At this stage, adolescents are in search of an identity that will lead them to adulthood. Adolescents make a strong effort to answer the question "Who am I?" Erikson notes the healthy resolution of earlier ( Read more... )

J7711: well...OH...ill vent on you
russ eX core: go for it.
J7711: my sister woke me up with her slamming agaisnt the wall with some..guy in her room. she stayed out extra late tonight cause my moms at my other sisters college and my sister thinks its great. she woke me up by having sex so im playing glassjaw in my room..i hope she walks in here ( Read more... )