003 ♍ Kanaya: Read new favorite book

[amagicalwitch]

The Library Here Has A Wide Collection Of Seemingly Appealing Titles

Comments

[dashboardlite]

...dude. [He snorts.] Those aren't vampires. Those are douchebags.

[amagicalwitch]

Theyre Vampires
It Says It
Many Times

[dashboardlite]

Lady, I hunt vampires. Vampires have a shit-ton of teeth, they're mean as Hell, and they sure as fuck don't sparkle in the sunlight.

[amagicalwitch]

Why

[dashboardlite]

...why don't they sparkle, or why do I hunt 'em?

[amagicalwitch]

The Latter
Sparkling Is Superfluous To This Conversation Now

[dashboardlite]

I hunt the blood-sucking bastards 'cause they kill people. S'my job.

[amagicalwitch]

Hypothetically Speaking If I was A Rainbow Drinker
Regardless Of My Sparkling Or Lack Of Sparkling
Would You Attempt To Kill Me

[dashboardlite]

Well, for one thing, you can't drink rainbows. And I wouldn't attempt to kill you.

[He scrutinizes her for a moment.]

...do you have horns?

[amagicalwitch]

Excuse Me I Meant Vampire
Troll Vampires Are Called Rainbow Drinkers
The Hemospectrum Is Much Bigger Than Just Red
But I Wouldnt Expect A Human To Understand That

Just Like I Wouldnt Expect A Human To Understand That Horns Are Standard For Trolls

[dashboardlite]

...you're a troll?

[He deadpans, raising an eyebrow. Seriously? Aren't trolls from like...Scandinavia, or something? And fugly as Hell?

Dean is not entirely familiar with the internet and all its intricacies, so some of this may be completely lost on him.]

Okay, wait. So all you grey people with horns are trolls? They're different where I'm from.

[amagicalwitch]

That Sounds About Right

[dashboardlite]

...and what's your name again?

[amagicalwitch]

Kanaya Maryam

[dashboardlite]

Nice t'meet ya. [She didn't ask, but he'll tell you anyway.] Name's Dean.

[amagicalwitch]

I See
Dean Who Hunts Vampires For No Apparent Reason
Are You Just A Facetious Human