(no subject)

[amaranth_fading]

Okay... so I could tell by this morning that this was NOT going to be a day worth remembering. I was right. It started off with Katie saying hi to me. Usually nothing wrong with someone saying hi, right? Wrong. It was the only word she said to me all day. All fucking day. What happened to my best friend? What happened to us? And then.. Leah came and sat beside me, accross from Katie. If looks could kill, Leah would be dead. In order to get away from all that shit, I went to bathroom, dragging Leah along with me. We ran into Kasey, and walked around the school. Until we got baqck to the caffetira. You know what killed me. When I was gone, Katie seemed toi be laughing and having a jolly old time! So is it me? Cause even when I'm around all by myself, I seem to be this huge nusience. Then... I got in a little fight with Alexis, which I think is fixed.. but I have no idea about anything having to due with my friends anymore, so I could be totally wrong. Then everything was fine until lunch. I went to the caffeteria. KT was eating outside.. and I said hi to Katie. She didn't say anything. WHAT THE BLOODY HELL? That pissed me off. Then Alexis came and sat down, and Victoria asked her if she had escaped from jail or something, cause she was wearing black and white striped socks and my shirt. Alexis just looked at her, and gave her this glare. Like... why are you talking to me? Fuck. That pissed me off even more.
After lunch, it was okay.. nothing abnormal from everyother after lunch this year. XP. I didn't walk with Katie and Alexis home. Mainly cause of dance. But it also woulda been kinda awkward.
I felt like I was holding back tears all day. I dont even know why. It just.. feels wierd.
I could have slashed my wrist 20 times today if it weren't for books, and looking forwards to dance.
Love always,
emily<3