050 I heart Markie
A tale of how the memory of Mark Owen has haunted me my whole life.
„ The story begins almost 20 years ago when life was rubbish. There was no Internet, everyone wore shell suits and had bad hair and Bryan Adams had spent 4 months at number 1. ”
... But soon enough all the girls wanted to have their hair pulled by nobody but Mark Owen.
☑ The early 90s
Take That mania
1993-ish
I assume the year my father finally invested in cable television. Pray came along and in that video, despite Jason having no pants, there's really only one bloke getting all the attention. Everybody had their own favourite Mark's moment from Pray. Like...
... this one did it for some. But mine was a bit different. 1:30, turning round, wind playing with his hair, looking away, all broody and thoughtful. And still kinda shirtless.
1994-ish
We didn't get Smash Hits in here, but we did have Bravo. Me & sis used to spend every penny on it. Which was like 5PLN, our monthly allowance. What we did was, we ripped out the posters of hot guys or whole groups from the middle of the magazines and collected them. Best childhood game ever: at the age of 8 or 9 me & sis putting two posters at a time next to each other and playing "who's hotter". Mark always won.
In the final round he was usually just competing with himself.
1995 & 1996
Eventful years. Robbie left.
*Who cares, he's always been the least attractive one in the band, and the one causing all the trouble, the bad boy, seriously why is he ever so popular?* He wasn't, Mark was, but that piece of info kinda got lost on me then.
Everybody wanted to know just how the boys were gonna go on without him. Ultimately they didn't, not for long at least. Take That split up. I frowned. *Rob, you bastard, it's all your fault.*
Somebody came out saying he was gay, and it wasn't just Robbie Williams, who was like, saying that all the time. Oh God, please, not the one I liked!
That's when it first dawned on me that the pretty ones are always gay. Well, isn't that something to learn when you're 10? Except that Mark really wasn't, and it was all just a huge scam. But I did read about it in Bravo!
Funny enough, in 2003, after splitting up with his then girlfriend, Chloe Bailey, Mark mentioned sth about being gay again → Mark Owen is considering a gay future, after a series of love disasters with girls.
So here's Mark with a girl who almost made him gay. And guess what, she's also the one who, 3 years after their break-up, claimed he was a sex god. You know, the usual testimony stuff, 'up to six times a day in a series of 10-hour sex marathons', 'for some guys It Only Takes A Minute , but we'd be there for hours', etc → Take That star is amazing lover. Good to know.
1998
Anastasia, animated film.
By that time we even got HBO. It was all so disturbingly familiar. Somewhere in Imperial Russia, in deep winter, an old castle with broken furniture, lots of snow everywhere, and a working class lad in a big coat and a hat wandering around looking for a girl.
Wait, wasn't it a movie? Couldn't remember the title, but was sure as hell it was a great one (Dirty Dancing kinda great, which around that time I also discovered wasn't actually a film about people dancing in a church), and one with a really hot male lead (yep, that would be Markie). Because yeah, it was Babe, The Movie. All 4:51 of it.
Babe, a song with a plot.
1998
World Cup
Always knew that Owen footballer guy's name sounded familiar. Remember Michael Owen?
" Michael Owen first played for the senior England team in 1998, becoming England's youngest player and youngest goalscorer at the time. His performance at the 1998 World Cup brought him to national and international prominence. "
Well, as a youth Mark Anthony Patrick Owen wanted to become a professional footballer too. He played for Chadderton FC and had trials at Manchester United, Huddersfield Town and Rochdale football clubs.
" I wanted to be a footballer. That was mine kinda dream. I used to train like mad every night. I'd be out there wanting to be Diego Maradona. "
However, around the age of 14 or 15, after he got a bit of an injury, he decided the life of a professional sportsman seemed 'too much like hard work'. He's still a pretty big football fan though. He supports Liverpool (despite being from Manchester), which is good.
☑ The high school years
Boys
So wait, there's a reason why all my life I've been attracted to short blond lads with washed out blue eyes? Their names usually beginning with M?
To be fair, lots of good things start with the letter M. Like Marla. Magda. Mark. Manchester. Mr Mark Darcy.
Still, when Magda (and she was the girl who re-awakened my passion for Take That) asked me years later who was my favourite guy in the band, after me going, 'What were their names again?', I knew out of that bunch I could only have been in love with a Mark.
I also recall having said that I would never EVER date a guy who wasn't info football.
☑ 2nd year of uni
I once fancied a guy because he wore the exact same sweater as Mark in Back For Good. Of course I didn't realize that at the time, I just really liked the sweater. I even ended up having it on me one night. What can I say, it was a good sweater.
Mark Owen Co. Professional polishing work for your car.
And then, after tormenting me like that my whole life he goes off, marries a girl and fathers two children (not exactly in that order). How very rude of him!
„ The story begins almost 20 years ago when life was rubbish. There was no Internet, everyone wore shell suits and had bad hair and Bryan Adams had spent 4 months at number 1. ”
... But soon enough all the girls wanted to have their hair pulled by nobody but Mark Owen.
☑ The early 90s
Take That mania
1993-ish
I assume the year my father finally invested in cable television. Pray came along and in that video, despite Jason having no pants, there's really only one bloke getting all the attention. Everybody had their own favourite Mark's moment from Pray. Like...
... this one did it for some. But mine was a bit different. 1:30, turning round, wind playing with his hair, looking away, all broody and thoughtful. And still kinda shirtless.
1994-ish
We didn't get Smash Hits in here, but we did have Bravo. Me & sis used to spend every penny on it. Which was like 5PLN, our monthly allowance. What we did was, we ripped out the posters of hot guys or whole groups from the middle of the magazines and collected them. Best childhood game ever: at the age of 8 or 9 me & sis putting two posters at a time next to each other and playing "who's hotter". Mark always won.
In the final round he was usually just competing with himself.
1995 & 1996
Eventful years. Robbie left.
*Who cares, he's always been the least attractive one in the band, and the one causing all the trouble, the bad boy, seriously why is he ever so popular?* He wasn't, Mark was, but that piece of info kinda got lost on me then.
Everybody wanted to know just how the boys were gonna go on without him. Ultimately they didn't, not for long at least. Take That split up. I frowned. *Rob, you bastard, it's all your fault.*
Somebody came out saying he was gay, and it wasn't just Robbie Williams, who was like, saying that all the time. Oh God, please, not the one I liked!
That's when it first dawned on me that the pretty ones are always gay. Well, isn't that something to learn when you're 10? Except that Mark really wasn't, and it was all just a huge scam. But I did read about it in Bravo!
Funny enough, in 2003, after splitting up with his then girlfriend, Chloe Bailey, Mark mentioned sth about being gay again → Mark Owen is considering a gay future, after a series of love disasters with girls.
So here's Mark with a girl who almost made him gay. And guess what, she's also the one who, 3 years after their break-up, claimed he was a sex god. You know, the usual testimony stuff, 'up to six times a day in a series of 10-hour sex marathons', 'for some guys It Only Takes A Minute , but we'd be there for hours', etc → Take That star is amazing lover. Good to know.
1998
Anastasia, animated film.
By that time we even got HBO. It was all so disturbingly familiar. Somewhere in Imperial Russia, in deep winter, an old castle with broken furniture, lots of snow everywhere, and a working class lad in a big coat and a hat wandering around looking for a girl.
Wait, wasn't it a movie? Couldn't remember the title, but was sure as hell it was a great one (Dirty Dancing kinda great, which around that time I also discovered wasn't actually a film about people dancing in a church), and one with a really hot male lead (yep, that would be Markie). Because yeah, it was Babe, The Movie. All 4:51 of it.
Babe, a song with a plot.
1998
World Cup
Always knew that Owen footballer guy's name sounded familiar. Remember Michael Owen?
" Michael Owen first played for the senior England team in 1998, becoming England's youngest player and youngest goalscorer at the time. His performance at the 1998 World Cup brought him to national and international prominence. "
Well, as a youth Mark Anthony Patrick Owen wanted to become a professional footballer too. He played for Chadderton FC and had trials at Manchester United, Huddersfield Town and Rochdale football clubs.
" I wanted to be a footballer. That was mine kinda dream. I used to train like mad every night. I'd be out there wanting to be Diego Maradona. "
However, around the age of 14 or 15, after he got a bit of an injury, he decided the life of a professional sportsman seemed 'too much like hard work'. He's still a pretty big football fan though. He supports Liverpool (despite being from Manchester), which is good.
☑ The high school years
Boys
So wait, there's a reason why all my life I've been attracted to short blond lads with washed out blue eyes? Their names usually beginning with M?
To be fair, lots of good things start with the letter M. Like Marla. Magda. Mark. Manchester. Mr Mark Darcy.
Still, when Magda (and she was the girl who re-awakened my passion for Take That) asked me years later who was my favourite guy in the band, after me going, 'What were their names again?', I knew out of that bunch I could only have been in love with a Mark.
I also recall having said that I would never EVER date a guy who wasn't info football.
☑ 2nd year of uni
I once fancied a guy because he wore the exact same sweater as Mark in Back For Good. Of course I didn't realize that at the time, I just really liked the sweater. I even ended up having it on me one night. What can I say, it was a good sweater.
Mark Owen Co. Professional polishing work for your car.
And then, after tormenting me like that my whole life he goes off, marries a girl and fathers two children (not exactly in that order). How very rude of him!