Unrest (1/2)
Author: amarielah
Title: Unrest
Fandoms: Digimon
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Ken/Daisuke/Miyako
Wordcount: 5,348
Warnings: Graphic depictions of sexual acts, yaoi, het.
Summary: Dreams sometimes reveal our deepest desires, and Ken Ichijouji is no exception.
Note: This takes place in a timeline where the Digital World was sealed at the end of 02, and all the partner Digimon with it. I normally want to include them, but this time I just felt like focusing on the humans.
_____
Miyako gasps, arching into Daisuke's hand as it moves beneath her panties. A hand-- usually so clumsy--that is making her writhe and squirm in delight.
"That's it," says the Kaiser, shrouded in the shadows. "Make her beg."
Daisuke, ever stubborn, kisses her. But it's clear from her moans that yes, she is begging. She wants it, and Daisuke isn't giving it to her.
" I want to hear her say it."
Obedience is what is due to him, and Daisuke understands this. He pulls back, leaving Miyako's mouth free to speak.
"Stop being an idiot and fuck me already," she says. And then Daisuke catches one of her nipples in his mouth, which causes her to shiver. "Please, Daisuke. I want you--" She gasps again. "--I want you inside of me. Now."
"She's demanding, isn't she?" says the Kaiser, darkly amused. "But I must agree; it's time for you to give in. You've wanted this for so long, haven't you?"
This time, it's Daisuke who moans, and kisses Miyako with a fierce sort of tenderness. When he breaks it, he answers, "Yeah."
"Yes...?"
"Yes, master."
"Very good. Now, why don't you take off her panties?"
Daisuke does so hurriedly, and then takes off his boxers. "You're sure about this, right?" he asks Miyako, even as he's rubbing himself against the warm wetness of her arousal. The Kaiser can see that it's taking every bit of Daisuke's limited restraint not to sink into her, and it makes him chuckle softly.
"Yes, for the last time. So quit stalling." Miyako reaches down to pull him into her, eyes half-lidded and fevered. She's beautiful like this. Radiant, in fact, and the Kaiser spares a moment just to look at her--at the way she bites her lip when Daisuke finally enters her, finally begins to move.
"You're mine," he tells them, watching as they writhe together on the floor, panting. "Both of you are mine, and always will be."
Miyako wraps her long legs around Daisuke as his thrusts become more forceful. "We're yours," she says. "God...Daisuke, say it. Tell him." She closes her eyes in bliss.
"We're--oh fuck--" His thrusts are becoming more erratic now. "We're yours. We'll always be yours."
The Kaiser smirks. "I'm glad that you understand," he says. "I give you permission to come."
Daisuke shivers and surges forward, kissing Miyako desperately. Helpless moans emanate from the backs of their throats as they cling to each other, the kiss becoming gentler as the shivering subsides. They stay like that for a time, Miyako using her fingertips to trace patterns up and down Daisuke's sweat-slicked back.
When Daisuke finally pulls out and rolls onto his back, he looks as if he's ready to fall asleep. But before he has the chance, Miyako pulls in close and kisses him tenderly on the cheek, her lips lingering there almost reverently. She then sits up and smoothes his damp hair away from his face, kissing his forehead. "I love you," she says, and looks into the shadows where she knows the Kaiser is hiding. "Both of you."
She's smiling like she means it.
"We'll always be yours."
________
Ken's eyes snapped open with a start.
Oh, he thought, suddenly realizing where he was. That was just a dream.
His mouth felt like sandpaper, there was a lump in his throat, and when he lifted up the covers, he found that the wet patch in his boxers was not just his imagination. The blood rushed to his cheeks instantaneously, and something like shame twisted in his stomach.
Most of his dreams were forgotten shortly after he woke up, even the ones that sometimes caused these sorts of incidents. But not this time. Oh no--this time, the dream was almost as vivid as a memory, and little details kept imposing themselves on his still sleep-addled brain.
It doesn't mean anything, he told himself, even as the not-quite-memories stirred reluctant arousal into the shame, creating an uncomfortable mixture of emotion. It's just your neurons firing at random; It doesn't mean anything.
He pushed himself upright and threw back the covers completely, climbing down the ladder that connected his bed with the floor below. The clock on the wall told him that it was only three o'clock in the morning, which meant that both of his parents were still fast asleep. He was thankful for that, since he could scarcely imagine how embarrassing it would be for one of his parents to walk in and see him in a pair of soiled underwear.
With this in mind, he locked his door--something that he'd rarely done since his 'disappearance' all those years ago--and changed into a new pair as quickly as he could, even deciding to put on a pair of pajama pants. It had gotten chilly enough during the course of the night that a little extra cloth wouldn't be overwhelming.
There was a half-empty glass of water on his desk from the night before, and he gulped it down. It wasn't enough, but he wasn't willing to go to the kitchen and risk waking his parents. So he climbed back up to bed and cocooned himself in the covers, willing himself to go back to sleep. To forget about the stupid dream.
But sleep did not come.
Without really wanting to, he began to analyze the dream, perhaps hoping that deconstructing it would lessen its impact. He thought about the sheer impossibility that something like that would have ever happened, even if he had been older. How Miyako would have sooner spat in his face than given him any kind of affection, let alone love.
In the dream, he had wanted them, but had been too afraid to step out of the shadows. Because, if they saw him for what he was, they would have stopped being...
His.
He allowed himself a bitter smile. Beyond the fact that neither of his friends were possessions to be owned--this was, he told himself, the important part--the idea that they would ever share this perverse lust of his was a complete joke. He'd felt it for at least two years, but had never dared to act on it. If nothing else, he was very good at hiding things.
But, if he was honest with himself, he had started to think of them as his. And he knew it wasn't fair, that it was a throwback to a time when he'd been too afraid to acknowledge any feelings of attachment for what they really were.
I'm nothing but a selfish child, he thought, and wished that Wormmon was with him. Wormmon had always known what to say when Ken had a particularly emotional dream.
But...it had still just been a dream, right? Just because it had a little bit of truth to it didn't mean that he was going to start trying to seduce his best friends. After all, just the thought of actually going through with it was enough to make him blush all the way to his ears.
He got out of bed again, realizing that sleep was impossible. He needed to do something that would distract him, something that didn't have so many uncertainties.
It was a good thing that he had a lot of math homework.
_____
If somebody were to ask Ken why he had chosen to go to Kaibara High, he would have responded that it had been what he was looking for at the time.
This was a lie.
The real reason why he had chosen that particular school had to do with one thing only: Inoue Miyako went there. It wasn't a bad school by any stretch of the imagination, but it certainly wasn't as prestigious as some. His parents had briefly tried to convince him to choose somewhere else, but he had been politely adamant.
He had spent most of his childhood friendless, and he refused to allow this to continue during his high school years.
And Inoue Miyako was precisely who he was thinking about as he walked through the crowds of milling students in the school's courtyard. More to the point, he was thinking of strategies to avoid her. It wasn't that he didn't want to see her--rather, he was afraid of what might happen. Miyako could be incredibly stubborn if she thought that Ken was acting strangely.
Unfortunately, he was not to have any luck in that pursuit.
"Morning, Ken-kun!" called Miyako, running up to walk beside him. "How are you?"
Ken felt his stomach drop to his feet, and he didn't allow himself look at her. "I'm well," he lied. "And how are you?"
"I'm alright, I guess. I had trouble sleeping last night. I kept getting these really weird nightmares. You know, the ones that feel real until you wake up?"
"I'm sorry to hear that."
He felt a hand come to rest on his shoulder, and his heart began to beat faster. Without really thinking about it, he jerked away. "Geez, Ken-kun. Is something wrong?"
He took a deep breath, trying to get his heart rate under control. "I'm really fine," he insisted.
"Do you honestly believe that I'm stupid enough to buy that? Don't think I haven't noticed that you haven't even looked at me once."
Reluctantly, Ken looked at her. "I also had trouble sleeping last night," he admitted. "And I'm...nervous, for some reason. I didn't want to trouble you." As he had feared, images from the dream began to surface at the sight of her face. And he found himself wondering helplessly if her lips would flush if he kissed them for long enough, as they had in the dream.
Miyako shook her head in exasperation. "Honestly, Ken-kun, you trouble me a lot more when you try to hide these things from me." She smiled. "Looks like we get to be wired together, huh?"
"...Yeah," he said, looking away again. He felt like he was losing control--like he couldn't trust himself not to do something stupid. "We should probably get to class, Miyako-san." He didn't give her the chance to reply before he walked away as quickly as he could.
He was looking forward to the monotonous familiarity of his lessons.
______
He successfully avoided her for the rest of the school day by going to the library at lunch, and using a different route to get to the subway. There would have to be an apology made the next day, of course, and he would have to make up some fake but plausible explanation. Hopefully she'd forgive him, even though he knew she would probably be upset for quite a while. He'd have to live with it, since her ire was infinitely better than her disgust.
When he arrived at his apartment, however, he found himself in a situation that was not nearly as simple to avoid.
"Your friend Motomiya-kun came over to visit," said his mother when he walked into the kitchen. "He's waiting in your room."
For a moment, Ken found himself unable to speak. But then he swallowed and said, "...I see. Thank you for telling me." He seriously contemplated walking straight out the door again. But that wasn't an option, as it would undoubtedly make his mother worry.
He palms began to sweat as he walked to his bedroom, locking the door automatically. Sure enough, Daisuke was there, lounging in his desk chair with a Weekly Shounen Jump in hand.
"Oh hey," he said, looking up from the magazine. "Miyako texted me about how you were actin' weird, so I decided to come over."
Trust Daisuke to get straight to the point. "I'm just not feeling well," said Ken, walking over to the ladder by his bed. Frustratingly, Daisuke took this as an invitation to follow suit, and climbed onto the mattress before Ken even had a chance to do it himself.
"We both know that's complete crap, so come up here and spill."
Daisuke had long ago decided that Ken's bed was their official heart-to-heart location, and Ken had never been overly pleased about this. But he had never dreaded it before. Now, however...
He climbed the ladder with shaking hands, and sat down cross-legged next to Daisuke. Ken could feel the other boy's eyes on him, and it made his skin tingle.
He wished that he wanted it to stop.
"So, what's up?"
"I just had a strange dream," said Ken.
"Oh yeah? What kind of dream?" asked Daisuke, shifting close. It took all of Ken's willpower not to move away in response.
"Does it really matter?" snapped Ken, without really meaning to. He had meant it to sound neutral, but it came out sounding angry. He took another deep breath.
"Woah," responded Daisuke. "Whatever this is--it's really bothering you, huh?" He put an arm around Ken's shoulder, who stiffened almost immediately. "Why don't you just tell me? You'll probably feel better once you do."
"I can't, Daisuke." He felt his eyes burn. "I just need to be alone."
There was a long pause, as if Daisuke was gathering his thoughts. And then, "Dude...do you even realize that you have a boner?"
Ken's eyes went wide, and blood rushed hotly to his face. His head snapped to look his friend.
Daisuke didn't look disgusted, though--just thoughtful. "So it was a sex dream, huh?"
Ken drew his legs self-consciously to his chest. "...Yeah," he said, looking down at the covers.
"I'm just gonna take a wild guess here: you don't ever jerk off, do you?"
He was right, of course, and it only added on a new layer to Ken's mounting humiliation. "I fail to see why that has anything to do with this."
Daisuke sighed. "Lie down, okay?"
Tentatively, Ken looked over to his friend once more. There was a determined look on Daisuke's face. "Why?"
Daisuke reached out and put a hand on one of Ken's knees, and the touch sent little shocks skittering up his spine, causing him to bite his lip. "Dude...I wanna help you. If I leave, you're just gonna ignore all this until it goes away, and then you're gonna end up acting weird tomorrow too." Daisuke picked up the pillow and handed it to Ken. "It's not like it means you're gay. You can still think about girls."
Finally, Ken understood what Daisuke was talking about. "You can't possibly mean..." he gripped the pillow very tightly.
Daisuke smiled. "It's not that big of a deal, Ken. I mean, I do it to myself all the time--it can't be that hard to do it to you too, right?"
Ken felt his eyes narrow, even as his stomach was doing flip-flops. "Don't be an idiot, Daisuke." He hated feeling this way, hated being angry with Daisuke. But, even if Daisuke didn't realize it, he was toying with Ken's feelings. And Ken just wasn't in the right place to take that in stride.
Daisuke was frowning now. "If you really don't want me to, then fine. But..."
"But what?" asked Ken, tersely.
"But...could you at least tell me why?"
And it was then that Ken found himself in one of the oddest situations he'd ever faced in his entire life. His friend wanted to...touch him...in a very intimate way, and, apparently, the only way to reject him without hurting his feelings was to tell him the truth. Which would be worse.
It wasn't like he didn't want Daisuke to touch him, because he did. But it wouldn't be a friendly gesture to him, and knowing that's what it meant to Daisuke would be something very difficult to live with.
Still...the very thought of Daisuke touching him like that was enough to send a spike of arousal through him, so strong that it was clouding his judgment. And the words left him before he had time to reconsider.
"Have you ever thought about kissing Miyako-san?"
Daisuke blinked in surprise. "Huh?"
Ken felt his blush deepen. "Never mind."
"No, it's alright. Um..." Daisuke rubbed the back of his neck. "I've actually done more than think about it."
A thrill of excitement made Ken's embarrassment lessen somewhat. "What do mean?" he asked.
It was Daisuke's turn to blush. "Well...we were hanging out one night, and Miyako had broken into her mother's liquor cabinet. And, uh...we got a little...frisky, if you know what I mean." He hit himself in the forehead. "But she made me promise not to tell anyone. Man, she's gonna kill me if she ever finds out. You won't tell her, right?"
For the first time that afternoon, it was Ken who was moving closer. His imagination was supplying him with some very explicit imagery--much of which were informed by the dream. His mouth was starting to go very dry, but he just couldn't bring himself to care.
"I won't, but only on one condition." This is bad. I shouldn't be doing this. Oh god, this isn't right.
"You're in one of those moods, huh? So what's the condition?"
His previous embarrassment and shame seemed like an echo now, a dull protest in the back of his mind. Yes, he knew that this wasn't right. Yes, he knew that this was probably stupid. But he didn't care. He wanted to know. "Tell me more."
"Really?" asked Daisuke, face breaking surprisingly into grin. "Alright, but don't go freaking out on me." His forehead scrunched in thought. "We didn't actually, you know, do it, but, well..." He began to fiddle idly with Ken's blanket, which had become crumpled due to their moving around on it. "We got into an argument--I can't remember what about. All I know is that we ended up sorta...wrestling...and then we just started kissing."
"Is that all you did?" asked Ken, his pulse thudding loudly in his ears.
"Well...after we'd been kissing for a while, Miyako started...um...rubbing me through my shorts, and then she took my hand and...and..." Daisuke trailed off, laughing nervously. "Geez--this is harder than I thought it would be."
"And what, Daisuke?"
"And...she made me touch her under her skirt. Actually, she made me touch her...under her panties."
Ken took a shaky breath. "Is that offer still on?"
Daisuke seemed to snap out of a reverie. "Huh? What offer?"
"To help me with my...problem."
"Oh that? Sure. Just lie down and take off your pants." Daisuke chuckled. "Or, you know, the other way around. That would probably be easier."
Ken found that his hands were surprisingly steady as he removed the specified item of clothing. Setting down the pillow that Daisuke had handed him before, he lay down on his back.
"I always figured you were a briefs kinda guy," said Daisuke. Ken could feel his hand--calloused and surprisingly cool--resting on his upper thigh. The hand moved soon enough, and Daisuke began to rub him through his underwear. "Dude, you're seriously hard. That must have been a pretty amazing dream."
Ken closed his eyes and breathed through his nose. He felt his underwear being tugged down, and Daisuke said, "Hey, lift your hips up."
He did so, and the underwear were pulled down to his thighs, leaving him completely exposed. Softly, almost hesitantly, Daisuke used his fingertips to trace up and down the underside. The little prickles of sensation were tortuous.
"You're not stupid, Daisuke," Ken found himself saying, opening his eyes to stare at the ceiling. "You have to know that this isn't the kind of thing that friends do to each other."
Daisuke encircled him with whole hand, and began to pump lightly. "Yeah," he said breathlessly. "I know. But...I wanted to."
Ken let his head lull to the side as the sensation in his lower belly began to build. "Stop," he said softly.
Daisuke pulled his hand away. "Shit...Ken, I'm sorry." And when Ken pushed himself onto his elbows, he could see that Daisuke had that forlorn look on his face--the one that made him look like a puppy caught out in the rain. It made his chest ache with affection.
He maneuvered himself so that he could shift closer to Daisuke, and said, "Don't apologize." He put his hands on Daisuke's shoulders. "Lie down, Daisuke."
"Huh? But I thought that you wanted me to stop."
It was wrong, he knew, but Ken felt...powerful. Daisuke wanted this, and he understood what it meant. And Ken found himself willing to do things that he'd never thought possible. "Lie down," he said again, his tone more commanding.
Finally, Daisuke did so.
Ken felt a smirk twist his lips, and he leaned forward so that his mouth was right by Daisuke's ear. He knew that he should have felt embarrassed, half naked and aroused, with his mother probably still in the kitchen preparing dinner. But he didn't.
And it had nothing to with the fact that he'd locked the door.
"We have to be as quiet as possible," he whispered into Daisuke's ear, trailing a hand to rest on his stomach. "But I want you to answer a few questions. Is that alright?"
Daisuke's adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed. "Y-yeah. That's fine."
Ken let his hand slip under Daisuke's shirt, and was greeted with the enticing texture of warm, smooth skin. Daisuke's muscles twitched beneath the gentle caress of Ken's fingers.
"Miyako-san...when you touched her underneath her panties...was she wet?"
Daisuke let out a harsh breath. "Yeah. And...and really warm."
"Mmm," said Ken, kissing Daisuke's neck. "Did you make her come for you?" He threaded his free hand through Daisuke's messy hair, and used the other to move lower still, down to the bulge in Daisuke's shorts. He didn't know if this was what he was supposed to do--but it felt good to touch Daisuke like this. And Daisuke wasn't asking him to stop.
"I don't think so," said Daisuke. "I didn't really know what I was doing, and I was a bit..." Ken began to massage him through his shorts. "...Distracted."
"I read somewhere that there's a way that you can make a girl come," said Ken, massaging him more firmly. "There's a little nub above her opening, and, if you rub it for long enough--" Ken shoved his hand past the elastic waistband of Daisuke's shorts and boxers, and began to stroke Daisuke's bare erection. He didn't know the right technique, having never actually done it to himself, but he could hear that Daisuke was starting to pant. "--You can make her come for you."
Daisuke gave a quiet groan. "You're not being fair," he said.
Ken's smirk widened. "And why is that?"
"I want to touch you too, damn it."
Ken ran his thumb over the tip of Daisuke's cock, feeling the wetness that had gathered there sliding against his skin. "Only after you've answered one more question."
Daisuke bucked upwards into Ken's hand. "S-stop being a jerk."
Ken chuckled and kissed Daisuke's cheek. Did Daisuke even realize just how adorable he was? "Last question," he said. "Do you want to be inside of her?"
"W-what?" asked Daisuke, bucking into Ken's hand again. "Whad'ya mean?"
Ken began to pump, like Daisuke had done to him earlier. "Do you want to fuck her, Daisuke? Be honest, or I won't let you touch me again."
Daisuke bit his bottom lip, then said, "Yeah, okay?" Then, he let out a delicious noise from the back of his throat. "I want to."
"You want to what, Daisuke?" Ken needed to hear it.
Daisuke shuddered, and Ken felt his cock pulse in his hand. "I want to fuck her," he whispered.
Suddenly, Ken pulled his hand out from Daisuke's shorts, and reached up to cup his cheek. "Why?" he asked.
"Huh?" Daisuke blinked, as if processing the question. "Well, she's pretty, and fun to be around, and...she can be a jerk sometimes, but I like her. A lot."
"Do you mean it?" whispered Ken, smirk falling away. His eyes were burning again.
"Yeah," said Daisuke, averting his eyes. "I mean it."
"...And how do you feel about me?"
Daisuke bit his bottom lip without responding. But Ken waited patiently. When the words finally came, Ken felt like his heart was going to give out.
"I really like you too."
Was it really possible to be this happy? Did he even deserve to be this happy?
"Please look at me," said Ken, a little desperately.
Daisuke didn't. "But...it's wrong, isn't it? I know I sometimes don't get things, but I know that--when you feel this way--it's only supposed to be about one person. Like how I used to feel about Hikari-chan."
Ken trailed his fingers down Daisuke's flushed cheek and gently gripped his chin. "Look at me, Daisuke."
Tentatively, Daisuke's eyes focused on Ken.
"Maybe it is wrong," said Ken, trying to sound more confident than he actually was. "But...I feel the same way. I love you, and I love Miyako-san, and..." Ken felt wetness on his cheeks. "I want both of you so badly. I thought that it was impossible."
Daisuke smiled apologetically. "Now that I think about it, this actually explains a lot. I probably should have done this sooner." It was Daisuke's turn to reach out, and he wiped Ken's cheek with the pad of his thumb. "Come on, Ken--don't cry. It'll be weird, but we'll talk to Miyako tomorrow. And...if she's not interested, we'll still have each other, right?"
"...Right," said Ken.
"So, can we get back to what we were doing? I can't brainstorm if I've got blue balls."
Ken's tears were starting to subside, and he sighed in fake exasperation. "Do you really have to be so crude about everything, Daisuke?"
"That's real funny, coming from you. You were the one talking about fucking, remember?"
Ken's smirk returned. "And talk is cheap," he said, pushing Daisuke down. This time, he kissed him--a simple press of lips. But Daisuke would have none of that, and he managed to reverse their positions so that he was on top. Had he wanted to, Ken could have prevented this easily--but he had never really minded being in this position with Daisuke.
"That was your first kiss, wasn't it?" asked Daisuke, expression serious, which caught Ken off guard.
"Um...yes," he said, flushing. It was strange how a kiss could be more embarrassing than everything else they'd already done. But...it was different, somehow. Special.
"So," said Daisuke, leaning down until their lips were just barely touching, "Let's make your second kiss a real one." He closed the distance and ran his tongue over Ken's lips, and Ken opened his mouth instinctively. It was strange at first, hot and wet and slippery, and Ken heard a little voice in the back of his head saying this is how diseases are spread. But after a moment or two, he realized that he didn't care. He liked it. No--he loved it. And Daisuke's whole body was pressed against him with an intimacy that Ken had never before experienced in his life. He buried his hands in Daisuke's hair, doing his best not to let out a moan.
Daisuke began to shift his hips against Ken's exposed lower half, creating a delicious friction between them. His pace wasn't hurried, and the pleasure began to build at a slow, tortuous pace. Ken took it all in: the harsh fabric of Daisuke's shorts against his erection, the inviting warmth of Daisuke's skin, the slick caress of Daisuke's tongue. And then he imagined Miyako--cheeks flushed and eyes warm with affection--watching them. He imagined her working herself open with slick, clumsy fingers, and biting her bottom lip in an attempt to stifle her moans.
"Oh fuck," whispered Daisuke harshly, breaking away from the kiss. His thrusts were becoming desperate. "God, Ken--I'm gonna come."
Ken yanked Daisuke down to resume the kiss, which became a sloppy, unfocused mess of lips and tongues. And then Ken's whole body was on fire, shivering with an almost unbearable pleasure. He didn't make a sound, but Daisuke's name echoed like a mantra in his head. Unconsciously, he began to run his fingers through Daisuke's hair, the kiss calming down to a slow, affectionate caress.
Daisuke rolled off of him with a contented sigh. "That was awesome," he said, with a goofy smile on his face.
"...Yeah," said Ken, rolling onto his side so that he was facing away from the other young man. He suddenly felt very naked.
"You didn't like it?" asked Daisuke, and Ken felt even worse at the wounded tone of his voice.
Ken sat up abruptly and searched around the bed for his discarded pants. "I liked it," he said.
"So then why are you acting so weird?"
He stopped his search for a beat, and debated whether or not to tell Daisuke the truth. He had already revealed so much in such a short stretch of time, perhaps it would be better to actually be honest upfront for once.
After all, there was a first time for everything.
"I shouldn't have spoken to you that way," he said softly. His pants were crumpled up in the far corner of his bed, along with his underwear, and he pulled them on as quickly as he could, given the limited maneuvering space.
"What? You mean the dirty talk? That was hot."
With his pants finally on, Ken felt somewhat more calm, but the shame was still there, twisting in his gut like some kind of parasite. "Don't pretend like it didn't remind you of anything," he said, doing his best not to let his agitation show in his voice.
"So what if it did?" Ken could hear his bed squeak as Daisuke moved closer to him.
"How can you say that?" Ken's hands were clenching into fists, even though he was doing his best to stop it. Daisuke didn't know about the content of the dream, and Ken had no intention of telling him, but that didn't really change anything. "I thought that I wasn't like that anymore." He closed his eyes tightly in an effort to stop any tears from forming. "What if I end up hurting you?"
There were just too many conflicting emotions whirling around in his head.
Daisuke draped an arm around Ken's shoulders. "If it happens, it happens. But you're my best friend and I like you a lot, so...whatever. I guess we'll both have to risk it." He pulled him in closer. "Anyway, I've known you for a long time, and you've never managed to hurt me. Not even when you were trying to. So don't sweat it, okay?"
Ken should have been annoyed at the rather dismissive tone of Daisuke's voice, but he found it soothing.
"By the way, I'm gonna need to borrow some pants before we can work out what to do about Miyako. Mine are all crusty and gross."
Ken couldn't help but chuckle. "I can't believe that we're actually going to go through with this."
"Yeah," agreed Daisuke. "It's pretty weird." He let go of Ken and descended to his closet, rifling through Ken's neatly-hung pants.
"Try not to crease anything, please," said Ken, before he could stop himself.
"I won't," replied Daisuke. He opened the top drawer and found a pair of neatly-folded sweatpants, which he quickly shuffled on. Then, he was back on the bed.
"So, you gonna tell me about this dream of yours or not?"
Ken started. "I--I thought we were going to think up a strategy."
"Yeah. But it's obvious that the dream is part of what's bothering you. So fess up."
He swallowed. "Tomorrow," he said. "I'll tell you tomorrow."
Daisuke looked at him skeptically. "You promise?"
He was backed into a corner, he knew. So, with much reluctance, he said, "I promise."
Daisuke's grinned. "Alright! Let's figure out how to make Miyako ours."
Ours. How could such a simple word make his heart skip a beat? A slow smile spread across Ken's face. "Yeah," he said, leaning in and kissing Daisuke on the lips. "Let's get started."
Title: Unrest
Fandoms: Digimon
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Ken/Daisuke/Miyako
Wordcount: 5,348
Warnings: Graphic depictions of sexual acts, yaoi, het.
Summary: Dreams sometimes reveal our deepest desires, and Ken Ichijouji is no exception.
Note: This takes place in a timeline where the Digital World was sealed at the end of 02, and all the partner Digimon with it. I normally want to include them, but this time I just felt like focusing on the humans.
_____
Miyako gasps, arching into Daisuke's hand as it moves beneath her panties. A hand-- usually so clumsy--that is making her writhe and squirm in delight.
"That's it," says the Kaiser, shrouded in the shadows. "Make her beg."
Daisuke, ever stubborn, kisses her. But it's clear from her moans that yes, she is begging. She wants it, and Daisuke isn't giving it to her.
" I want to hear her say it."
Obedience is what is due to him, and Daisuke understands this. He pulls back, leaving Miyako's mouth free to speak.
"Stop being an idiot and fuck me already," she says. And then Daisuke catches one of her nipples in his mouth, which causes her to shiver. "Please, Daisuke. I want you--" She gasps again. "--I want you inside of me. Now."
"She's demanding, isn't she?" says the Kaiser, darkly amused. "But I must agree; it's time for you to give in. You've wanted this for so long, haven't you?"
This time, it's Daisuke who moans, and kisses Miyako with a fierce sort of tenderness. When he breaks it, he answers, "Yeah."
"Yes...?"
"Yes, master."
"Very good. Now, why don't you take off her panties?"
Daisuke does so hurriedly, and then takes off his boxers. "You're sure about this, right?" he asks Miyako, even as he's rubbing himself against the warm wetness of her arousal. The Kaiser can see that it's taking every bit of Daisuke's limited restraint not to sink into her, and it makes him chuckle softly.
"Yes, for the last time. So quit stalling." Miyako reaches down to pull him into her, eyes half-lidded and fevered. She's beautiful like this. Radiant, in fact, and the Kaiser spares a moment just to look at her--at the way she bites her lip when Daisuke finally enters her, finally begins to move.
"You're mine," he tells them, watching as they writhe together on the floor, panting. "Both of you are mine, and always will be."
Miyako wraps her long legs around Daisuke as his thrusts become more forceful. "We're yours," she says. "God...Daisuke, say it. Tell him." She closes her eyes in bliss.
"We're--oh fuck--" His thrusts are becoming more erratic now. "We're yours. We'll always be yours."
The Kaiser smirks. "I'm glad that you understand," he says. "I give you permission to come."
Daisuke shivers and surges forward, kissing Miyako desperately. Helpless moans emanate from the backs of their throats as they cling to each other, the kiss becoming gentler as the shivering subsides. They stay like that for a time, Miyako using her fingertips to trace patterns up and down Daisuke's sweat-slicked back.
When Daisuke finally pulls out and rolls onto his back, he looks as if he's ready to fall asleep. But before he has the chance, Miyako pulls in close and kisses him tenderly on the cheek, her lips lingering there almost reverently. She then sits up and smoothes his damp hair away from his face, kissing his forehead. "I love you," she says, and looks into the shadows where she knows the Kaiser is hiding. "Both of you."
She's smiling like she means it.
"We'll always be yours."
________
Ken's eyes snapped open with a start.
Oh, he thought, suddenly realizing where he was. That was just a dream.
His mouth felt like sandpaper, there was a lump in his throat, and when he lifted up the covers, he found that the wet patch in his boxers was not just his imagination. The blood rushed to his cheeks instantaneously, and something like shame twisted in his stomach.
Most of his dreams were forgotten shortly after he woke up, even the ones that sometimes caused these sorts of incidents. But not this time. Oh no--this time, the dream was almost as vivid as a memory, and little details kept imposing themselves on his still sleep-addled brain.
It doesn't mean anything, he told himself, even as the not-quite-memories stirred reluctant arousal into the shame, creating an uncomfortable mixture of emotion. It's just your neurons firing at random; It doesn't mean anything.
He pushed himself upright and threw back the covers completely, climbing down the ladder that connected his bed with the floor below. The clock on the wall told him that it was only three o'clock in the morning, which meant that both of his parents were still fast asleep. He was thankful for that, since he could scarcely imagine how embarrassing it would be for one of his parents to walk in and see him in a pair of soiled underwear.
With this in mind, he locked his door--something that he'd rarely done since his 'disappearance' all those years ago--and changed into a new pair as quickly as he could, even deciding to put on a pair of pajama pants. It had gotten chilly enough during the course of the night that a little extra cloth wouldn't be overwhelming.
There was a half-empty glass of water on his desk from the night before, and he gulped it down. It wasn't enough, but he wasn't willing to go to the kitchen and risk waking his parents. So he climbed back up to bed and cocooned himself in the covers, willing himself to go back to sleep. To forget about the stupid dream.
But sleep did not come.
Without really wanting to, he began to analyze the dream, perhaps hoping that deconstructing it would lessen its impact. He thought about the sheer impossibility that something like that would have ever happened, even if he had been older. How Miyako would have sooner spat in his face than given him any kind of affection, let alone love.
In the dream, he had wanted them, but had been too afraid to step out of the shadows. Because, if they saw him for what he was, they would have stopped being...
His.
He allowed himself a bitter smile. Beyond the fact that neither of his friends were possessions to be owned--this was, he told himself, the important part--the idea that they would ever share this perverse lust of his was a complete joke. He'd felt it for at least two years, but had never dared to act on it. If nothing else, he was very good at hiding things.
But, if he was honest with himself, he had started to think of them as his. And he knew it wasn't fair, that it was a throwback to a time when he'd been too afraid to acknowledge any feelings of attachment for what they really were.
I'm nothing but a selfish child, he thought, and wished that Wormmon was with him. Wormmon had always known what to say when Ken had a particularly emotional dream.
But...it had still just been a dream, right? Just because it had a little bit of truth to it didn't mean that he was going to start trying to seduce his best friends. After all, just the thought of actually going through with it was enough to make him blush all the way to his ears.
He got out of bed again, realizing that sleep was impossible. He needed to do something that would distract him, something that didn't have so many uncertainties.
It was a good thing that he had a lot of math homework.
_____
If somebody were to ask Ken why he had chosen to go to Kaibara High, he would have responded that it had been what he was looking for at the time.
This was a lie.
The real reason why he had chosen that particular school had to do with one thing only: Inoue Miyako went there. It wasn't a bad school by any stretch of the imagination, but it certainly wasn't as prestigious as some. His parents had briefly tried to convince him to choose somewhere else, but he had been politely adamant.
He had spent most of his childhood friendless, and he refused to allow this to continue during his high school years.
And Inoue Miyako was precisely who he was thinking about as he walked through the crowds of milling students in the school's courtyard. More to the point, he was thinking of strategies to avoid her. It wasn't that he didn't want to see her--rather, he was afraid of what might happen. Miyako could be incredibly stubborn if she thought that Ken was acting strangely.
Unfortunately, he was not to have any luck in that pursuit.
"Morning, Ken-kun!" called Miyako, running up to walk beside him. "How are you?"
Ken felt his stomach drop to his feet, and he didn't allow himself look at her. "I'm well," he lied. "And how are you?"
"I'm alright, I guess. I had trouble sleeping last night. I kept getting these really weird nightmares. You know, the ones that feel real until you wake up?"
"I'm sorry to hear that."
He felt a hand come to rest on his shoulder, and his heart began to beat faster. Without really thinking about it, he jerked away. "Geez, Ken-kun. Is something wrong?"
He took a deep breath, trying to get his heart rate under control. "I'm really fine," he insisted.
"Do you honestly believe that I'm stupid enough to buy that? Don't think I haven't noticed that you haven't even looked at me once."
Reluctantly, Ken looked at her. "I also had trouble sleeping last night," he admitted. "And I'm...nervous, for some reason. I didn't want to trouble you." As he had feared, images from the dream began to surface at the sight of her face. And he found himself wondering helplessly if her lips would flush if he kissed them for long enough, as they had in the dream.
Miyako shook her head in exasperation. "Honestly, Ken-kun, you trouble me a lot more when you try to hide these things from me." She smiled. "Looks like we get to be wired together, huh?"
"...Yeah," he said, looking away again. He felt like he was losing control--like he couldn't trust himself not to do something stupid. "We should probably get to class, Miyako-san." He didn't give her the chance to reply before he walked away as quickly as he could.
He was looking forward to the monotonous familiarity of his lessons.
______
He successfully avoided her for the rest of the school day by going to the library at lunch, and using a different route to get to the subway. There would have to be an apology made the next day, of course, and he would have to make up some fake but plausible explanation. Hopefully she'd forgive him, even though he knew she would probably be upset for quite a while. He'd have to live with it, since her ire was infinitely better than her disgust.
When he arrived at his apartment, however, he found himself in a situation that was not nearly as simple to avoid.
"Your friend Motomiya-kun came over to visit," said his mother when he walked into the kitchen. "He's waiting in your room."
For a moment, Ken found himself unable to speak. But then he swallowed and said, "...I see. Thank you for telling me." He seriously contemplated walking straight out the door again. But that wasn't an option, as it would undoubtedly make his mother worry.
He palms began to sweat as he walked to his bedroom, locking the door automatically. Sure enough, Daisuke was there, lounging in his desk chair with a Weekly Shounen Jump in hand.
"Oh hey," he said, looking up from the magazine. "Miyako texted me about how you were actin' weird, so I decided to come over."
Trust Daisuke to get straight to the point. "I'm just not feeling well," said Ken, walking over to the ladder by his bed. Frustratingly, Daisuke took this as an invitation to follow suit, and climbed onto the mattress before Ken even had a chance to do it himself.
"We both know that's complete crap, so come up here and spill."
Daisuke had long ago decided that Ken's bed was their official heart-to-heart location, and Ken had never been overly pleased about this. But he had never dreaded it before. Now, however...
He climbed the ladder with shaking hands, and sat down cross-legged next to Daisuke. Ken could feel the other boy's eyes on him, and it made his skin tingle.
He wished that he wanted it to stop.
"So, what's up?"
"I just had a strange dream," said Ken.
"Oh yeah? What kind of dream?" asked Daisuke, shifting close. It took all of Ken's willpower not to move away in response.
"Does it really matter?" snapped Ken, without really meaning to. He had meant it to sound neutral, but it came out sounding angry. He took another deep breath.
"Woah," responded Daisuke. "Whatever this is--it's really bothering you, huh?" He put an arm around Ken's shoulder, who stiffened almost immediately. "Why don't you just tell me? You'll probably feel better once you do."
"I can't, Daisuke." He felt his eyes burn. "I just need to be alone."
There was a long pause, as if Daisuke was gathering his thoughts. And then, "Dude...do you even realize that you have a boner?"
Ken's eyes went wide, and blood rushed hotly to his face. His head snapped to look his friend.
Daisuke didn't look disgusted, though--just thoughtful. "So it was a sex dream, huh?"
Ken drew his legs self-consciously to his chest. "...Yeah," he said, looking down at the covers.
"I'm just gonna take a wild guess here: you don't ever jerk off, do you?"
He was right, of course, and it only added on a new layer to Ken's mounting humiliation. "I fail to see why that has anything to do with this."
Daisuke sighed. "Lie down, okay?"
Tentatively, Ken looked over to his friend once more. There was a determined look on Daisuke's face. "Why?"
Daisuke reached out and put a hand on one of Ken's knees, and the touch sent little shocks skittering up his spine, causing him to bite his lip. "Dude...I wanna help you. If I leave, you're just gonna ignore all this until it goes away, and then you're gonna end up acting weird tomorrow too." Daisuke picked up the pillow and handed it to Ken. "It's not like it means you're gay. You can still think about girls."
Finally, Ken understood what Daisuke was talking about. "You can't possibly mean..." he gripped the pillow very tightly.
Daisuke smiled. "It's not that big of a deal, Ken. I mean, I do it to myself all the time--it can't be that hard to do it to you too, right?"
Ken felt his eyes narrow, even as his stomach was doing flip-flops. "Don't be an idiot, Daisuke." He hated feeling this way, hated being angry with Daisuke. But, even if Daisuke didn't realize it, he was toying with Ken's feelings. And Ken just wasn't in the right place to take that in stride.
Daisuke was frowning now. "If you really don't want me to, then fine. But..."
"But what?" asked Ken, tersely.
"But...could you at least tell me why?"
And it was then that Ken found himself in one of the oddest situations he'd ever faced in his entire life. His friend wanted to...touch him...in a very intimate way, and, apparently, the only way to reject him without hurting his feelings was to tell him the truth. Which would be worse.
It wasn't like he didn't want Daisuke to touch him, because he did. But it wouldn't be a friendly gesture to him, and knowing that's what it meant to Daisuke would be something very difficult to live with.
Still...the very thought of Daisuke touching him like that was enough to send a spike of arousal through him, so strong that it was clouding his judgment. And the words left him before he had time to reconsider.
"Have you ever thought about kissing Miyako-san?"
Daisuke blinked in surprise. "Huh?"
Ken felt his blush deepen. "Never mind."
"No, it's alright. Um..." Daisuke rubbed the back of his neck. "I've actually done more than think about it."
A thrill of excitement made Ken's embarrassment lessen somewhat. "What do mean?" he asked.
It was Daisuke's turn to blush. "Well...we were hanging out one night, and Miyako had broken into her mother's liquor cabinet. And, uh...we got a little...frisky, if you know what I mean." He hit himself in the forehead. "But she made me promise not to tell anyone. Man, she's gonna kill me if she ever finds out. You won't tell her, right?"
For the first time that afternoon, it was Ken who was moving closer. His imagination was supplying him with some very explicit imagery--much of which were informed by the dream. His mouth was starting to go very dry, but he just couldn't bring himself to care.
"I won't, but only on one condition." This is bad. I shouldn't be doing this. Oh god, this isn't right.
"You're in one of those moods, huh? So what's the condition?"
His previous embarrassment and shame seemed like an echo now, a dull protest in the back of his mind. Yes, he knew that this wasn't right. Yes, he knew that this was probably stupid. But he didn't care. He wanted to know. "Tell me more."
"Really?" asked Daisuke, face breaking surprisingly into grin. "Alright, but don't go freaking out on me." His forehead scrunched in thought. "We didn't actually, you know, do it, but, well..." He began to fiddle idly with Ken's blanket, which had become crumpled due to their moving around on it. "We got into an argument--I can't remember what about. All I know is that we ended up sorta...wrestling...and then we just started kissing."
"Is that all you did?" asked Ken, his pulse thudding loudly in his ears.
"Well...after we'd been kissing for a while, Miyako started...um...rubbing me through my shorts, and then she took my hand and...and..." Daisuke trailed off, laughing nervously. "Geez--this is harder than I thought it would be."
"And what, Daisuke?"
"And...she made me touch her under her skirt. Actually, she made me touch her...under her panties."
Ken took a shaky breath. "Is that offer still on?"
Daisuke seemed to snap out of a reverie. "Huh? What offer?"
"To help me with my...problem."
"Oh that? Sure. Just lie down and take off your pants." Daisuke chuckled. "Or, you know, the other way around. That would probably be easier."
Ken found that his hands were surprisingly steady as he removed the specified item of clothing. Setting down the pillow that Daisuke had handed him before, he lay down on his back.
"I always figured you were a briefs kinda guy," said Daisuke. Ken could feel his hand--calloused and surprisingly cool--resting on his upper thigh. The hand moved soon enough, and Daisuke began to rub him through his underwear. "Dude, you're seriously hard. That must have been a pretty amazing dream."
Ken closed his eyes and breathed through his nose. He felt his underwear being tugged down, and Daisuke said, "Hey, lift your hips up."
He did so, and the underwear were pulled down to his thighs, leaving him completely exposed. Softly, almost hesitantly, Daisuke used his fingertips to trace up and down the underside. The little prickles of sensation were tortuous.
"You're not stupid, Daisuke," Ken found himself saying, opening his eyes to stare at the ceiling. "You have to know that this isn't the kind of thing that friends do to each other."
Daisuke encircled him with whole hand, and began to pump lightly. "Yeah," he said breathlessly. "I know. But...I wanted to."
Ken let his head lull to the side as the sensation in his lower belly began to build. "Stop," he said softly.
Daisuke pulled his hand away. "Shit...Ken, I'm sorry." And when Ken pushed himself onto his elbows, he could see that Daisuke had that forlorn look on his face--the one that made him look like a puppy caught out in the rain. It made his chest ache with affection.
He maneuvered himself so that he could shift closer to Daisuke, and said, "Don't apologize." He put his hands on Daisuke's shoulders. "Lie down, Daisuke."
"Huh? But I thought that you wanted me to stop."
It was wrong, he knew, but Ken felt...powerful. Daisuke wanted this, and he understood what it meant. And Ken found himself willing to do things that he'd never thought possible. "Lie down," he said again, his tone more commanding.
Finally, Daisuke did so.
Ken felt a smirk twist his lips, and he leaned forward so that his mouth was right by Daisuke's ear. He knew that he should have felt embarrassed, half naked and aroused, with his mother probably still in the kitchen preparing dinner. But he didn't.
And it had nothing to with the fact that he'd locked the door.
"We have to be as quiet as possible," he whispered into Daisuke's ear, trailing a hand to rest on his stomach. "But I want you to answer a few questions. Is that alright?"
Daisuke's adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed. "Y-yeah. That's fine."
Ken let his hand slip under Daisuke's shirt, and was greeted with the enticing texture of warm, smooth skin. Daisuke's muscles twitched beneath the gentle caress of Ken's fingers.
"Miyako-san...when you touched her underneath her panties...was she wet?"
Daisuke let out a harsh breath. "Yeah. And...and really warm."
"Mmm," said Ken, kissing Daisuke's neck. "Did you make her come for you?" He threaded his free hand through Daisuke's messy hair, and used the other to move lower still, down to the bulge in Daisuke's shorts. He didn't know if this was what he was supposed to do--but it felt good to touch Daisuke like this. And Daisuke wasn't asking him to stop.
"I don't think so," said Daisuke. "I didn't really know what I was doing, and I was a bit..." Ken began to massage him through his shorts. "...Distracted."
"I read somewhere that there's a way that you can make a girl come," said Ken, massaging him more firmly. "There's a little nub above her opening, and, if you rub it for long enough--" Ken shoved his hand past the elastic waistband of Daisuke's shorts and boxers, and began to stroke Daisuke's bare erection. He didn't know the right technique, having never actually done it to himself, but he could hear that Daisuke was starting to pant. "--You can make her come for you."
Daisuke gave a quiet groan. "You're not being fair," he said.
Ken's smirk widened. "And why is that?"
"I want to touch you too, damn it."
Ken ran his thumb over the tip of Daisuke's cock, feeling the wetness that had gathered there sliding against his skin. "Only after you've answered one more question."
Daisuke bucked upwards into Ken's hand. "S-stop being a jerk."
Ken chuckled and kissed Daisuke's cheek. Did Daisuke even realize just how adorable he was? "Last question," he said. "Do you want to be inside of her?"
"W-what?" asked Daisuke, bucking into Ken's hand again. "Whad'ya mean?"
Ken began to pump, like Daisuke had done to him earlier. "Do you want to fuck her, Daisuke? Be honest, or I won't let you touch me again."
Daisuke bit his bottom lip, then said, "Yeah, okay?" Then, he let out a delicious noise from the back of his throat. "I want to."
"You want to what, Daisuke?" Ken needed to hear it.
Daisuke shuddered, and Ken felt his cock pulse in his hand. "I want to fuck her," he whispered.
Suddenly, Ken pulled his hand out from Daisuke's shorts, and reached up to cup his cheek. "Why?" he asked.
"Huh?" Daisuke blinked, as if processing the question. "Well, she's pretty, and fun to be around, and...she can be a jerk sometimes, but I like her. A lot."
"Do you mean it?" whispered Ken, smirk falling away. His eyes were burning again.
"Yeah," said Daisuke, averting his eyes. "I mean it."
"...And how do you feel about me?"
Daisuke bit his bottom lip without responding. But Ken waited patiently. When the words finally came, Ken felt like his heart was going to give out.
"I really like you too."
Was it really possible to be this happy? Did he even deserve to be this happy?
"Please look at me," said Ken, a little desperately.
Daisuke didn't. "But...it's wrong, isn't it? I know I sometimes don't get things, but I know that--when you feel this way--it's only supposed to be about one person. Like how I used to feel about Hikari-chan."
Ken trailed his fingers down Daisuke's flushed cheek and gently gripped his chin. "Look at me, Daisuke."
Tentatively, Daisuke's eyes focused on Ken.
"Maybe it is wrong," said Ken, trying to sound more confident than he actually was. "But...I feel the same way. I love you, and I love Miyako-san, and..." Ken felt wetness on his cheeks. "I want both of you so badly. I thought that it was impossible."
Daisuke smiled apologetically. "Now that I think about it, this actually explains a lot. I probably should have done this sooner." It was Daisuke's turn to reach out, and he wiped Ken's cheek with the pad of his thumb. "Come on, Ken--don't cry. It'll be weird, but we'll talk to Miyako tomorrow. And...if she's not interested, we'll still have each other, right?"
"...Right," said Ken.
"So, can we get back to what we were doing? I can't brainstorm if I've got blue balls."
Ken's tears were starting to subside, and he sighed in fake exasperation. "Do you really have to be so crude about everything, Daisuke?"
"That's real funny, coming from you. You were the one talking about fucking, remember?"
Ken's smirk returned. "And talk is cheap," he said, pushing Daisuke down. This time, he kissed him--a simple press of lips. But Daisuke would have none of that, and he managed to reverse their positions so that he was on top. Had he wanted to, Ken could have prevented this easily--but he had never really minded being in this position with Daisuke.
"That was your first kiss, wasn't it?" asked Daisuke, expression serious, which caught Ken off guard.
"Um...yes," he said, flushing. It was strange how a kiss could be more embarrassing than everything else they'd already done. But...it was different, somehow. Special.
"So," said Daisuke, leaning down until their lips were just barely touching, "Let's make your second kiss a real one." He closed the distance and ran his tongue over Ken's lips, and Ken opened his mouth instinctively. It was strange at first, hot and wet and slippery, and Ken heard a little voice in the back of his head saying this is how diseases are spread. But after a moment or two, he realized that he didn't care. He liked it. No--he loved it. And Daisuke's whole body was pressed against him with an intimacy that Ken had never before experienced in his life. He buried his hands in Daisuke's hair, doing his best not to let out a moan.
Daisuke began to shift his hips against Ken's exposed lower half, creating a delicious friction between them. His pace wasn't hurried, and the pleasure began to build at a slow, tortuous pace. Ken took it all in: the harsh fabric of Daisuke's shorts against his erection, the inviting warmth of Daisuke's skin, the slick caress of Daisuke's tongue. And then he imagined Miyako--cheeks flushed and eyes warm with affection--watching them. He imagined her working herself open with slick, clumsy fingers, and biting her bottom lip in an attempt to stifle her moans.
"Oh fuck," whispered Daisuke harshly, breaking away from the kiss. His thrusts were becoming desperate. "God, Ken--I'm gonna come."
Ken yanked Daisuke down to resume the kiss, which became a sloppy, unfocused mess of lips and tongues. And then Ken's whole body was on fire, shivering with an almost unbearable pleasure. He didn't make a sound, but Daisuke's name echoed like a mantra in his head. Unconsciously, he began to run his fingers through Daisuke's hair, the kiss calming down to a slow, affectionate caress.
Daisuke rolled off of him with a contented sigh. "That was awesome," he said, with a goofy smile on his face.
"...Yeah," said Ken, rolling onto his side so that he was facing away from the other young man. He suddenly felt very naked.
"You didn't like it?" asked Daisuke, and Ken felt even worse at the wounded tone of his voice.
Ken sat up abruptly and searched around the bed for his discarded pants. "I liked it," he said.
"So then why are you acting so weird?"
He stopped his search for a beat, and debated whether or not to tell Daisuke the truth. He had already revealed so much in such a short stretch of time, perhaps it would be better to actually be honest upfront for once.
After all, there was a first time for everything.
"I shouldn't have spoken to you that way," he said softly. His pants were crumpled up in the far corner of his bed, along with his underwear, and he pulled them on as quickly as he could, given the limited maneuvering space.
"What? You mean the dirty talk? That was hot."
With his pants finally on, Ken felt somewhat more calm, but the shame was still there, twisting in his gut like some kind of parasite. "Don't pretend like it didn't remind you of anything," he said, doing his best not to let his agitation show in his voice.
"So what if it did?" Ken could hear his bed squeak as Daisuke moved closer to him.
"How can you say that?" Ken's hands were clenching into fists, even though he was doing his best to stop it. Daisuke didn't know about the content of the dream, and Ken had no intention of telling him, but that didn't really change anything. "I thought that I wasn't like that anymore." He closed his eyes tightly in an effort to stop any tears from forming. "What if I end up hurting you?"
There were just too many conflicting emotions whirling around in his head.
Daisuke draped an arm around Ken's shoulders. "If it happens, it happens. But you're my best friend and I like you a lot, so...whatever. I guess we'll both have to risk it." He pulled him in closer. "Anyway, I've known you for a long time, and you've never managed to hurt me. Not even when you were trying to. So don't sweat it, okay?"
Ken should have been annoyed at the rather dismissive tone of Daisuke's voice, but he found it soothing.
"By the way, I'm gonna need to borrow some pants before we can work out what to do about Miyako. Mine are all crusty and gross."
Ken couldn't help but chuckle. "I can't believe that we're actually going to go through with this."
"Yeah," agreed Daisuke. "It's pretty weird." He let go of Ken and descended to his closet, rifling through Ken's neatly-hung pants.
"Try not to crease anything, please," said Ken, before he could stop himself.
"I won't," replied Daisuke. He opened the top drawer and found a pair of neatly-folded sweatpants, which he quickly shuffled on. Then, he was back on the bed.
"So, you gonna tell me about this dream of yours or not?"
Ken started. "I--I thought we were going to think up a strategy."
"Yeah. But it's obvious that the dream is part of what's bothering you. So fess up."
He swallowed. "Tomorrow," he said. "I'll tell you tomorrow."
Daisuke looked at him skeptically. "You promise?"
He was backed into a corner, he knew. So, with much reluctance, he said, "I promise."
Daisuke's grinned. "Alright! Let's figure out how to make Miyako ours."
Ours. How could such a simple word make his heart skip a beat? A slow smile spread across Ken's face. "Yeah," he said, leaning in and kissing Daisuke on the lips. "Let's get started."