Yes, another long chapter >.> they don't seem to be getting any shorter...
Jake was studiously not watching as the healers stripped Grace, her human body as well as her avatar, and covered her with a few strategically placed vines for decency (something about her skin needing to be in touch directly with the roots of the tree) so he just happened to be facing in the right direction to catch sight of Trudy's Sampson as she set down near the link-mod. He strode quickly over to see if she needed any help, remembering that Norm had said something about her having gone out to Hometree to bring back Tom and some other folks, and figuring that an extra set of hands would not go amiss getting her offloaded of her precious cargo.
"Good to see you made it out in one piece," he said, extending a hand to help Tom down as soon as Trudy powered down the rotors.
"Good to see you made it here in one piece," Tom raised an eyebrow, "Trudy said something about you convincing the Omatikaya to let you back into their good books, but she wouldn't tell me what you did, said it was your story to tell."
"It is," Jake nodded, "but not right now. There's...more important things." He went back over to help the very shaky Na'vi women down out of the Sampson. "I managed to convince Mo'at to help Grace, and that's what we're about to do. Your timing is impeccable, really.
"What do you mean?" Tom asked as he helped Ninat out and squeezed her hand before they both turned back to lift the litters with the Na'vi men out carefully one at a time and carry them to a flat space where they could be set down without worrying about their occupants being uncomfortable.
"The ceremony is just about to begin," Norm, already in his avatar again, explained, coming up to them, "I didn't exactly get the full story, but it involves her avatar and I think...well we'll just have to see," he shook his head, "it all sounds a bit incredible to me, but then, I suppose one has to suspend disbelief sometimes, and this is one of those times. Everyone's gathering - well, everyone who's well enough, that is - and the healers say Grace is ready."
"I'll stay here and keep an eye on these folks," Trudy offered quickly, and Jake couldn't help noticing how quickly Norm's hand reached out to her, resting on her shoulder and pulling her against him.
"You don't have to stay here," he said, "I'm sure you'd be allowed to come with us; I could go ask quickly."
She shook her head. "It's all good," she said, "I know you could probably talk Mo'at into letting me be there, but there's probably a bunch of Na'vi who don't think I would belong, and I'm not gonna jeopardize what could be Grace's only chance just so I can stick my nose in where it doesn't belong." She turned then and hugged Norm as best she could while he was in his avatar, and without even thinking about it, he lifted her up into his arms to give her a more proper hug before setting her down again. "I'll be fine here, me at Tseo'ong can chat and work on our foreign languages."
"Tseo'ong? Is he around? I've kindof been keeping an eye out for him but I hadn't found him. Actually I was a little worried he might be..."
"He was," Trudy nodded, "but we just brought him back."
Jake felt a tap on his shoulder then, and turned to see one of the healers.
"It is time, Toruk Makto," she said respectfully, "Tsahìk Mo'at has prepared all that must be prepared, and the People are ready."
He nodded without a word, and followed her, Norm and Tom not far behind him.
"Is there anything I can do to help?" Tom asked.
"You may lend your support, as all gathered here do," the healer said.
"I will show you what to do," Neytiri reassured him as they reached the preparation area where Grace and her avatar were waiting for them.
Jake glanced over at his mate, catching her eyes and letting her see the confusing wave of emotions that threatened to overwhelm him. He could see just as much worry, love and concern in her own gaze, and it made him feel at least a tiny bit better about things.
Not long after that, Jake found himself walking among the seated, chanting Omatikaya, Grace's tiny, frail-seeming human body resting in his arms. She had been heavily medicated for most of the day, but the healers had given her something to counter the sleepiness the meds were giving her, and she was just finally beginning to stir. He forced a smile onto his face as he looked down at her.
"Look where we are, Grace," he said softly as her eyes opened.
"Ah," she whispered breathily, her voice still slurring a little, "I need to take some samples..."
He remembered what she had once said, when explaining about the Tree of Souls to him after Neytiri had taken him flying over it one day, that she would "die to get samples" from the tree. He really, really hoped that those words weren't going to be interpreted literally. Still though, it wasn't a good thing that she'd said that. Even the most agnostic of Marines, after all, knew the power of Murphy, and that you just don't tempt fate by saying things that could be held against you later on at the worst possible moment. Still, he didn't want her to know he was concerned in any way, so he flashed her a little grin and stepped up onto the platform made by the roots of the tree, over to where Norm was already arranging the limbs of her avatar as Mo'at directed him.
Tom followed just a little behind Neytiri, who was a little behind Jake and Grace, and when they stepped up onto the roots of the tree, Neytiri gestured to him to take his place next to her.
As soon as Jake and Neytiri had settled Grace down as comfortably as they could manage, Mo'at knelt close to both her forms, examining them, for what purpose Tom couldn't be sure. He felt Ninat's hand slip into his, and he squeezed it, her support making him feel slightly better, although the only thing that would make him feel completely better right now would be to see Grace well.
"The Great Mother may choose to save all that she is in this body," Mo'at gestured at Grace's avatar, and Tom felt his heart sink. Or was that Jake's reaction? Sometimes Tom couldn't be sure anymore, the twin bond having become so much stronger since their arrival on Pandora.
Jake was the one who asked the question they both wanted answered. "Is that possible?"
"She...must pass through the eye of Eywa and return," Mo'at explained, "but, Jhakesuuly... She is very weak."
Tom's eyes were drawn to Grace again, and he noticed (how could he have missed it earlier?) that the ground below them was sending up tendrils of bioluminescent...rootlets? That was the only way he could describe them. They seemed almost to be burrowing into Grace's skin, and that of her avatar, but it didn't appear to be causing her any kind of pain, which was something, anyway.
"Hang on, Grace," Jake encouraged, sitting next to her and placing a soft, almost tentative hand on her shoulder, "we'll fix you up."
Tom knelt next to his brother, placing his own hand over her knee. "We're right here with you," he said, "and we're not going to let you go without a fight."
To Grace, lying curled up on the ground, the edges of her brain still fuzzy from the morphine and whatever else they'd given her for the pain, the scene was like something out of a dream...or a nightmare...no, she finally decided, it was more like that really weird trip she'd had from Demerol after her second miscarriage, the light seeming to brighten and fade, brighten and fade in time with her heartbeat, the low chanting of the hundreds of Na'vi echoing through her bones and making her feel as light as a feather, and everything seemed to be surrounded by halos of light...although that might just have been the tree overhead. It was truly magnificent from so close, like a massive weeping willow, and Grace smiled slightly as she remembered (how long ago had it been since she last remembered) the tree she'd fallen asleep under when she was a little girl, when she got separated (ran away) from her parents in the park, in the days when there still was a park, and small green spaces within the city. The willow tree's fronds brushing over her in the slight breeze had felt almost like a blanket, or some sort of warm embrace of the earth, and for just a little while everything had been right in her world...
"Hear us please, Great Mother," she heard Mo'at call out, and she joined her voice to theirs, in her mind.
'If you are real,' she...well, I guess you'd have to say she prayed, 'if you are real then show me! Prove your existence to me!'
"Take this spirit into you and breath her back to us," Mo'at implored, and Grace was surprised to realize she could feel a warm tingling all over her body, as if she'd just come out of the icy cold and into a hot tub, almost hot enough to be painful, but not enough to burn. "Let her walk among us as one of the People!"
Yes, Grace thought, it would be nice to become one of the Na'vi...but she'd always known that path wasn't - couldn't be - for her.
"And why should it not be?" she heard a very soft, warm voice ask, and she couldn't tell if it was someone sitting nearby or if it was all inside her head. "Why should you not be given the opportunity offered to all who love this world as much as you do."
'Who...are you?' she asked in her head, testing to see if she would get an answer.
"Who do you think I am, Child?" was the amused response, "If you had ever truly learned to use your tswin and listen before this, you might have heard me in time for this not to be the necessary outcome."
'Are you...Eywa?' she asked, with a sense of wonder matched only by the wonder she had always felt as she finally began to understand the incredible beauty of how a plant worked, the intricate details that all functioned together to create something so individual and precisely suited to exactly what it needed to be and do.
"Who else would I be, Child," the voice laughed, "now, you have a decision to make. Will you push your weary spirit into your other body and make it indeed your true body, or will you let me make your destiny for you?"
'And if I don't push...will I die?' The question had to be asked, and Grace knew, realistically, that dying was exactly what she was in the process of right now. She was enough of a scientist and a realist not to lie to herself about that.
"You may, or you may not..." Eywa said, and there was an echo of amusement to her voice, "They very much hope that you will be well, but you must choose your path, not allow them to choose it for you. Not even your children."
'Children? Oh, you mean...'
"I mean your children. They will be sad if you are gone, as all children must mourn their parents eventually, but you should not cause yourself more pain simply to assuage theirs. The choice is yours."
'Then I will let you decide my fate,' Grace said finally, 'and if that means I will live, then I will devote everything I have to fighting to keep the People safe, and if that means I will die, then I suppose I will at least be a martyr for the cause. I don't like the thought of them being sad, though. Especially...'
"You should reassure your children," Eywa told her, "before I take you into myself and bring you to your destiny."
'You're right, I should,' Grace agreed. Forcing her tired, limp body to move, she rolled over a little and looked up at Jake and Tom, the two boys almost hovering over her, and Norm, off to the other side. They looked sad and worried, and that just wouldn't do.
"I'm with her, boys," she said, the wonder of what she had just discovered more than clear in her voice, "she's real!"
"Grace," she could hear Jake's worried voice calling her, echoing as if down a long tunnel, "Grace, what's happening?" and she wished she could make it better for him, but she'd done all she could do, and now her whole body - no, her whole being was focused on a faraway point, something like the very first time she had ever linked to her avatar. Even the glow of the tree overhead seemed to change into the multicoloured tunnel of light that led her to her other body every time she laid down in the link bed... She let her eyes closed and just...let go, not worrying about what might happen anymore, at least not worrying about what might happen to her. She was in Eywa's hands now, and somehow the thought didn't worry her at all.
"Come to me, ma 'ite," she heard Eywa's now-familiar voice and blinked her eyes open. She was standing in some sort of meadow, beneath a tall razorpalm tree, and in front of her was what looked to be a distinguished Na'vi woman perhaps a similar age to Mo'at. She could tell right away, though, that this was no mere woman. The aura of power that radiated off her was enough to choke if she had so decided, but instead, Grace could feel it wrapping around her like a comforting blanket.
"So, um...now what, Nawma Sa'nok?" she asked a little hesitantly, "I mean, am I dead, or is this some kind of...intermediary process while you test me to see if I'm worthy to be sent back into my avatar body for good?"
"Both," Eywa smiled, "and neither. You are worthy, you are more than worthy; that has never been the question at issue. The question is, what is best for you? Do you want to go back there? Are you meant to go back, or to stay here?"
"I...I don't know," Grace admitted, "I want to be there to support Jake and Tom and Norm and all the others, all my friends among the AVTR program, but at the same time I'm...tired," she admitted. "I've been tired for a while now, and the thought of just being able to rest is...very tempting."
"Come to me, ma 'ite," Eywa held out her open arms, "and let me find where the balance lies."
Grace walked into her embrace without any hesitation, closing her eyes and submitting herself to her fate. She had always been a fighter, ever since she was born, but there came a time when a smart fighter had to know it was time to submit and let the fight continue another day.
After an eternal moment, Eywa sighed and Grace opened her eyes.
"You will stay," Eywa said a little sadly, "here, where you can do far more good. Another will come to me soon, many more, in fact, and you will be needed here for them, to help restore the balance the people of your birth have disrupted."
"Ah," Grace nodded, feeling a faint melancholy at the thought of having to leave them all, but knowing it was for the best. Besides, she'd always been curious what happened after death; this would be a grand new adventure, as long as she made sure to think of it that way, anyway. And if there was something she could do to try to fix the mess the humans had made of Pandora, then all the better, really.
"Come with me, ma 'ite," Eywa smiled at her, "and I will show you the wonders of this world of mine, where souls live on, and everything you could ever possibly need can be supplied merely by thinking it into being."
"I'm coming," Grace nodded and followed, not meekly - she could never be accused of being meek - but more calmly than she had felt in life in a very long time. Thinking things into being, hmm? This would indeed be a very interesting adventure!
*sniffles* Poor Grace! Well, but more than that, poor everyone she's left behind. This scene was the one that really killed me. It was tempting to keep her alive, but sometimes it just can't be.
In any case, why not distract yourself with something a little lighter...
Vocab:
ayVitrayä Ramunong - the Well of Souls, the depression in which the Tree of Souls grows
Vitrautral - the Tree of Souls
pa'li / fa'li - direhorse
ikran - banshee
toruk - "last shadow", great leonopteryx
Toruk Makto - legendary hero, "he who rides last shadow"
uniltìrantokx - dreamwalker body, empty avatar
yerik - hexapede
tawtute / sawtute - sky person/people
nantang - viperwolf
atokirina' - seeds of the sacred tree
uniltìranyu - dreamwalker, avatar
palulukan - thanator (^_^)
skxawng - moron
tsmuke - sister
zize' - hellfire wasp
toktor - doctor (English loanword)
tswin - the organ with which the Na'vi and other animals on Pandora connect.
yawne - beloved
-tsyìp - little
Sa'nok - Mother
Sempul - Father
olo'eyktan - clan leader
mawey - calm
tawsìp - sky ship (English loanword)
yawnetu - beloved person, boyfriend/girlfriend
Oel ngatì kameie - "I See you"
Ke pxan - literally "not worthy", this is a reply to "thank you", implying that the one recieving the thanks feels they are "not worthy" of such honour
irayo - thank you
'ite - daughter
Nawma Sa'nok - "Great Mother" - a formal title of Eywa