[ o o c ]
O O C
[ PLAYER ] Hotaru
[ AIM ] sonarium
[ JOURNAL ] camerababy
[ EMAIL ] umbrella dot lodge at gmail
[ MUSE ] Himura Kenshin (15)
[ CANON ] Rurouni Kenshin
[ POINT ] Manga-verse: Volume 21, Chapter 179
[ PERSONALITY (with spoilers) ]
In the beginning, it was his own naive ideals that led Kenshin to fight in a war of backhanded politics and money-loving traitors. His training cemented his desire to protect the weak as well as his own loathing of those who abuse power. In leaving for Kyoto, he believed that he would be able to realize his dream and become a protector, if not a savior, of the people who could not defend themselves. He resigned himself to dirtying his own sword in order to bring justice and peace to the nation. However, this self-proclaimed duty to protect the weak has also erased his own sense of self worth.
He can be a very obstinate person, and he is often very blunt, even when speaking to those he respects. Many times it is only these few moments when his superiors truly remember the youth beneath the coldly efficient assassin. Children are also drawn to this stubborn, if kind, nature. Through these brief interactions he allows himself a reprieve from guilt and duty, if only long enough to remember what and who he is truly fighting for. The months he spent living with Tomoe in the countryside gave him an understanding and a longing for a life of peace that he had never been able to experience. Politics may direct his sword, but his true strength comes from his desire to protect and pave a path for those too weak to do so themselves.
Although children are comfortable in his presence, Kenshin's skill with the sword and bloodthirsty reputation keep any adult with an ounce of sense from wanting to get too close. Few are privy to both the youth as well as the murderer, but it is only with that handful that he is able to form distinguishable bonds. He comes off as a quiet, well-mannered man who keeps to himself. His shyness stems from his previous seclusion rather than a noble upbringing. Indeed, he is only too aware that he barely qualifies to be in the samurai caste, and the majority of the grudging acceptance is due to his mastery of the sword. This, in turn, feeds his growing doubt that he could ever be worthy of forgiveness for what he has done.
Now that he has resolved to fight on the front lines, he plans to take any chance he is given to save the people in front of him. He is aware that his skill far surpasses normal swordsmen, but if given the chance he wishes to avoid killing senselessly. There are also occasions where his notorious reputation came in handy - such as when defending a woman's honor or avoiding questions about the cross-shaped scar on his cheek. He does his best to hide in the shadows whenever possible, not wanting to be challenged or be recognized by the enemy. This is not always as practical as it sounds, considering he has bright red hair and a cross-shaped scar on his cheek. Ironically, more than he is recognized, he is often mistaken for a woman due to his delicate features and diminutive height.
Following Tomoe's death Kenshin had yet another reason to keep himself removed from those he had begun to care about. He firmly believes that he is unworthy of another's love or care and will back away from any solution that allows him to find happiness. He blames himself for his wife's suffering, and especially her death at his hands, on his inability to protect her. Kenshin continues to mourn his wife, even as he curses his own inability to exact revenge on her murderer. He believes his existence itself will cause pain to those around him, but he also knows he cannot hope to atone for what he has done with his death alone. To him, life - not death - is the more difficult… and the more painful path. Therefore, he will continue on his path, unwavering, until he forgives himself or is forgiven in heaven.
Since his first visit to Discedo, Kenshin has returned to the front lines of the revolution. The madness that had been sheathed by Tomoe's presence is beginning to crack through is mask once more. He does his best to suppress all of his emotions to become the heartless assassin he had previously been. Eventually, this will lead to him developing what many would call a multiple personality complex. Currently, the two personalities have not separated to this point, but since his return to the front lines, a thin crack has begun separating the two aspects of his personality: the man who wants to help without killing, and the assassin who will do anything to protect those before him and further his goals for peace.
If asked, he is still unable to refuse a plea for aid or a call for help. Kenshin's determination to wield his bloodstained sword so that the innocent will not dirty their hands has not, and will not waver. He will not rest in his search until he is able to find his answer, his atonement, and his final peace.