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[amethyst_asp]

Oh lamentable life, why do you cling to me. I feel as though me and my tiny boy are all alone on an island. Perhaps my husband is there, he is sometimes. Unfortunately he can't handle my depression. It's not exactly support if it makes me feel worse. I don't blame him, I understand it's hard to be cheerful if your spouse is sad. It causes me to

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[embryonicdreams]

I am a firm believer that everything has it's time & place to blossom, and also its place to disintegrate and becoming something new. I have been often alone and without friendship. Those where the times when I was tested the most. You have to keep transforming and promise yourself to grow closer to things that inspire you. Once you have a fire big enough within no goodbye can alter this

[amethyst_asp]

It's such a curse to feel everyone else when most of them can't feel us. Don't you love that word lament? So ancient and bible-y yet not weird sounding in conversation ;) Dramatic though, getting a little better with writing I suppose ha ha

[amethyst_asp]

OH I forgot, since we're 'cutting the shit' ;) If I hadn't started at this school I might not have ever started anything. I figured my life would just be over since I had a kid (lol I'm so dramatic) But it seemed feasible, and it inspired me. So, I do know that things work toward the goal even if you act stupidly ;D Hell maybe even because of it. In the back of my head I am convinced my impulsiveness and risk taking nature will someday work better than I could hope, as silly as it seems when I feel depressed. But it still hurts awfully bad a lot. The bad stuff seem to be easier to believe.

Thank you for not letting me convince myself I was all alone :) I am not sure I do know it yet, but, I'm scared to. I hope though at least