It's not all in my head.

[amiretta]

Lauriehun86 (11:01:55 PM): I feel like I come second to everyone.
Ari (11:03:02 PM): you let yourself feel that way and you get stepped on by alot of assholes
Ari (11:03:10 PM): its NOT as if its all in your head
Ari (11:03:24 PM): and yes...you come second to me

Comments

[crazychild]

that's not necessarily the right thing to say, ari, but honestly i don't think that you, laurie, are thinking about this the right way--i really don't think most people prioritize that way. you don't come "first" or "second" to somebody, you are simply either very important, important, or not important (i'm sure there are more gradations than that, and it's obviously far more complex, but the general gist of it, in my opinion, is closer to that than to the way you were describing things). there are people i love and there are people i don't love, and i guess between people that fit two of those different (and very ill defined) categories you can say that one comes "before" the other (those i love come "before" those i don't love, usually) but if you are someone i love, you are just simply someone i love. no firsts, seconds, or thirds. and you, laurie, definitely have many, many people that love you. so i think that you have little to be upset about except for ari's rather rude comment.

*love*,
deannabanana

[polished]

laurie honey,
first of all, i love you. you need to know that. you're one of the bestest people in the world.
second of all, ari is a god damn asshole. that was the stupidest thing that he could have said.
deanna is right though. its not about coming first, its about being loved. and you laurie are one of the most loved people ever.
by me and deanna obviously for starters. and a million other people too.

xoxo

[ftprotocol]

Since I have the feeling saying "You're first in my mind" won't actually change anything, I'll give you my view on the topic, since I, quite often, feel I come second, but this is what works for me: Socialize with other people one on one so they have no one else in the conversation to compare you with. It may not be what you are looking for, but it might work.

-greg F. (a.k.a. greg 2)