I'll take, "things I can't admit on tumblr for $600, Alex."
blah blah blah, major Teen Wolf spoilers.
I'm so much more upset about the talk I'm seeing of a, "Teen Wolf exodus" than I am about Allison's actual death.
I mean. I'm upset about Allison dying. I'm upset about Allison not being a part of the show anymore. I'm upset about the blatant misogyny and racism evident in Jeff's habits regarding actors wanting to leave the show. I'm upset about how, given precedent, Allison's death is probably only going to be acknowledged for its effects on Chris and maybe Isaac (but probably just Chris) while Scott and Lydia and their reactions to Allison's death get completely ignored even though Lydia fucking felt it and tried to prevent it and even though Scott fucking held her in his arms while she died. I have mixed feelings on Allison's death scene itself.
I'm upset about everything the led up to Crystal feeling like the only thing that was good for her was to get the fuck out of this show with its toxic abusive jackass show-runner and its toxic childish pissant fandom who overwhelmingly think that shipping the fucking JUGGERNAUT SHIP, the ship that ate not just the Teen Wolf fandom BUT EVERY FUCKING OTHER FANDOM UNDER THE SUN EVER INCLUDING PACIFIC RIM AND ATTACK THE BLOCK, gives them a free pass to do whatever the fuck they want and cry about how the people shipping (cis white) dude slash ships used to be the marginalized weirdos in fandom like it's any fucking kind of relevant to anything anymore when (cis white) dude slash DOMINATES FUCKING EVERYTHING in fandom productions.
(insert angry hissing kitten noises at the jackass Sterek shippers who, sadly, may not be the majority but are definitely a powerful and vocal part of the Sterek shipping contingent and who are on a bonafide mission from God to ruin Teen Wolf and its fandom for the rest of us.)
But I'm even more upset about the talk of a ~Teen Wolf exodus~ to other shows because… I get it. I do. Jeff is a bullshit excuse for a show-runner in more ways than I can even begin to list right now. Everyone has their breaking points and some people I love are fed up enough to quit the show and that's totally their right and it's fair and I get where they're coming from. …but none of the other stuff they're talking about going and being a fandom for is really jumping out and grabbing me in the same monomaniacal way that Harry Potter and SPN and Teen Wolf grabbed me.
I like Elementary, Sleepy Hollow, Community, Pacific Rim, and Parks and Rec, and I have feels about all of them, but they kind of come and go, and I only rarely ever want to fic about only two of those things (Community and Pacific Rim). I always have Star Trek (TOS and DS9) to fall back on but finding someone else who fits what I need in a fellow Star Trek fan is next to impossible anymore and I don't have a lot of feels that I really want to fic about, which is a necessity for my fannish involvement. I'm debating whether or not to get over my intense aversion to Andy Fucking Samberg (he hasn't done anything to deserve it, I just irrationally hate him) and try out Brooklyn 99. Supposedly, I'm going to try out Pretty Little Liars for the queer ladies and Almost Human for Dorian and a sci-fi cop drama.
I'm really upset that Orphan Black doesn't actually appeal to me at all? Like, it has so many things that I should love, but at this point, I feel like it's been talked up way too much and shoved in my face way too much by fucking tumblr and made out to be the best thing to ever happen to feminist sci-fi in the history of forever and TATIANA FUCKING WOSSNAME OH MY GOD SHE'S A GODDESS!!!! and it's just going to be another case like Arrested Development where I shut up and watch the thing and just go, "this is what all the fucking fuss was about? are you fucking SERIOUS? where's all the good stuff, I was promised good stuff." and like… literally the only reasons I want to watch Orange is the New Black are Laverne Cox and Captain Janeway, but it's a moot point anyway because I'm too broke to afford Netflix.
and like… I just can't handle having to find a new main fandom right now. I only broke up with Supernatural not even a year ago yet, and that wound is still really fucking fresh because I did legit lose friends over it and it really meant a lot to me to have to give up on something that had been such a huge part of my life for three fucking years because I fucking could NOT even with the show or with its bullshit fandom anymore. I only really got settled into the Teen Wolf fandom in August, if we're being generous, and all of my fannish feels, most days? are Teen Wolf feels. and I hate the thought of losing more friends and people who are important to me over Allison's death and the ensuing ~Teen Wolf exodus~ and I hate feeling like a bad person or like I don't deserve to feel self-content as a fan just because I don't feel like I'm going to quit the show over Allison's death.
and I'm seriously about to cry over a fucking five page paper, which I should be able to write in my sleep except that I still have no idea how my field notes have fucking anything to do with the class readings at all or why my creeper Derek people watching at the mall is even remotely interesting to anyone since literally all I learned from it is, "malls are crowded and loud and people watching makes me feel like how I imagine Derek Hale feels all the time," and I just can't with any of this right now.
I'm so much more upset about the talk I'm seeing of a, "Teen Wolf exodus" than I am about Allison's actual death.
I mean. I'm upset about Allison dying. I'm upset about Allison not being a part of the show anymore. I'm upset about the blatant misogyny and racism evident in Jeff's habits regarding actors wanting to leave the show. I'm upset about how, given precedent, Allison's death is probably only going to be acknowledged for its effects on Chris and maybe Isaac (but probably just Chris) while Scott and Lydia and their reactions to Allison's death get completely ignored even though Lydia fucking felt it and tried to prevent it and even though Scott fucking held her in his arms while she died. I have mixed feelings on Allison's death scene itself.
I'm upset about everything the led up to Crystal feeling like the only thing that was good for her was to get the fuck out of this show with its toxic abusive jackass show-runner and its toxic childish pissant fandom who overwhelmingly think that shipping the fucking JUGGERNAUT SHIP, the ship that ate not just the Teen Wolf fandom BUT EVERY FUCKING OTHER FANDOM UNDER THE SUN EVER INCLUDING PACIFIC RIM AND ATTACK THE BLOCK, gives them a free pass to do whatever the fuck they want and cry about how the people shipping (cis white) dude slash ships used to be the marginalized weirdos in fandom like it's any fucking kind of relevant to anything anymore when (cis white) dude slash DOMINATES FUCKING EVERYTHING in fandom productions.
(insert angry hissing kitten noises at the jackass Sterek shippers who, sadly, may not be the majority but are definitely a powerful and vocal part of the Sterek shipping contingent and who are on a bonafide mission from God to ruin Teen Wolf and its fandom for the rest of us.)
But I'm even more upset about the talk of a ~Teen Wolf exodus~ to other shows because… I get it. I do. Jeff is a bullshit excuse for a show-runner in more ways than I can even begin to list right now. Everyone has their breaking points and some people I love are fed up enough to quit the show and that's totally their right and it's fair and I get where they're coming from. …but none of the other stuff they're talking about going and being a fandom for is really jumping out and grabbing me in the same monomaniacal way that Harry Potter and SPN and Teen Wolf grabbed me.
I like Elementary, Sleepy Hollow, Community, Pacific Rim, and Parks and Rec, and I have feels about all of them, but they kind of come and go, and I only rarely ever want to fic about only two of those things (Community and Pacific Rim). I always have Star Trek (TOS and DS9) to fall back on but finding someone else who fits what I need in a fellow Star Trek fan is next to impossible anymore and I don't have a lot of feels that I really want to fic about, which is a necessity for my fannish involvement. I'm debating whether or not to get over my intense aversion to Andy Fucking Samberg (he hasn't done anything to deserve it, I just irrationally hate him) and try out Brooklyn 99. Supposedly, I'm going to try out Pretty Little Liars for the queer ladies and Almost Human for Dorian and a sci-fi cop drama.
I'm really upset that Orphan Black doesn't actually appeal to me at all? Like, it has so many things that I should love, but at this point, I feel like it's been talked up way too much and shoved in my face way too much by fucking tumblr and made out to be the best thing to ever happen to feminist sci-fi in the history of forever and TATIANA FUCKING WOSSNAME OH MY GOD SHE'S A GODDESS!!!! and it's just going to be another case like Arrested Development where I shut up and watch the thing and just go, "this is what all the fucking fuss was about? are you fucking SERIOUS? where's all the good stuff, I was promised good stuff." and like… literally the only reasons I want to watch Orange is the New Black are Laverne Cox and Captain Janeway, but it's a moot point anyway because I'm too broke to afford Netflix.
and like… I just can't handle having to find a new main fandom right now. I only broke up with Supernatural not even a year ago yet, and that wound is still really fucking fresh because I did legit lose friends over it and it really meant a lot to me to have to give up on something that had been such a huge part of my life for three fucking years because I fucking could NOT even with the show or with its bullshit fandom anymore. I only really got settled into the Teen Wolf fandom in August, if we're being generous, and all of my fannish feels, most days? are Teen Wolf feels. and I hate the thought of losing more friends and people who are important to me over Allison's death and the ensuing ~Teen Wolf exodus~ and I hate feeling like a bad person or like I don't deserve to feel self-content as a fan just because I don't feel like I'm going to quit the show over Allison's death.
and I'm seriously about to cry over a fucking five page paper, which I should be able to write in my sleep except that I still have no idea how my field notes have fucking anything to do with the class readings at all or why my creeper Derek people watching at the mall is even remotely interesting to anyone since literally all I learned from it is, "malls are crowded and loud and people watching makes me feel like how I imagine Derek Hale feels all the time," and I just can't with any of this right now.