I have a similar issue, my solution has been rather calculated I deal with percentages, if I say no to something 3 times in a row I'll force myself into the fourth weather it's any more or less convenient that the others would have been. clearly that system has flaws. I think the best you can be is honest as to why the "no" is necessary if people care about you and really care then they'll understand if they don't want to make allowances for life and the fact that you can't always be at their beck and call then you don't need them. much easier said than done I know. I think the major thing is learning to acept that someone saying "no" isn't a rejection of *you* but a rejection of a suggestion or a situation, it's hard not to take things personally but a lot of it is having faith in the people you keep in your life, knowing that rejections and miscommunication are a part of life and being confident in your ability to work through negative feelings and reactions and knowing the people who care about you care enough to stick around
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