Just My Bill
Just My Bill
Original Air Date: 10-29-1982
is there anything that says porn more than a tapered gearshift?
I don't think I can say it enough: KITT is hot
The episode opens at a construction site, where a tall building is being erected. Devon is up near the top, with a woman, who is inspecting the building. This woman is Maggie Flynn, a state Senator.
this gentleman of color seems to be the foreman, in what I think is the first non-stereotyped role for a black man
Maggie is happy with what she sees, and she and Devon head down to the ground in the construction elevator. Devon wants to have a conversation with her, somewhere quiet, but Maggie has a packed schedule and tells him to either talk now or write a memo.
On the ground, Maggie bonds with the construction workers, who clearly love her. She is asked about a new power bill, and she explains that it is bad news for the citizens of the state, as it will destroy the environment and enrich private power companies at the expense of the people. The workers are all heartened that she is trying to stop the bill.
Devon is concerned for Maggie's safety and wants to assign her some "protection;" apparently she's been getting threats, her office was burglarized, and her phone has been bugged. While a pallet of what looks like bags of concrete swings ominously overhead on a crane, Maggie blows off Devon's concerns, leastwise until the pallet comes down almost on her head.
because it will be completely impossible to discover who was working the crane 10 seconds ago
Back at the Foundation semi, Bonnie is doing some adjustments to KITT.
an enviable position
Michael comes in and they exchange a little semi-friendly small talk. KITT affectionately compliments Bonnie, and she reveals that her father wanted her to be a surgeon. Devon comes in to inquire as to KITT's readiness and to hand out their next assignment. Michael protests; he has a date tonight! Devon announces that he has canceled Michael's date, and asks what Michael knows about Maggie Flynn.
It turns out that Michael knows a lot about her, including that she has the "best voting record in the state legislature." Best voting record by whose standards? Lots of organizations provide report cards for politicians and they never agree on which one is the best. Or does this mean simply that she has missed the fewest votes? That seems like kind of an odd factoid to memorize for a guy who lived in Nevada until a couple of months ago.
Regardless, Devon wants Michael to be Maggie's "constant companion" until further notice, possibly because Maggie is on the Foundation's Board of Trustees, but more probably because she is buddies with Devon. Devon then escapes after telling Michael to direct any further questions to KITT. The only question on Michael's mind is who gave Devon his girlfriend's phone number. KITT pleads the 5th.
this is his revenge for that alpha circuit incident
Michael and KITT head to the capitol to meet up with Maggie. They pull into the parking garage, but can't find any open non-reserved spots.
this threat is a lot more meaningful to KITT than to Michael
Michael's solution is to just pull into one of the reserved spots and let KITT fend for himself. It doesn't take long for a security guard to notice KITT, but while he calls his buddy to send a tow truck, KITT quietly moves himself to another spot.
Meanwhile, Michael searches through the statehouse for Maggie's office, revealing what he thinks is appropriate attire for a visit to the legislature.
did he really just throw on a light-colored blazer over his jeans and gaping-open shirt?
He finds Maggie's office and introduces himself to her administrative assistant, whose name is Jane Adams.
male administrative assistants don't exist
Maggie isn't in but is due back soon. As Michael goes to shut the office door, he spots Maggie and another Senator in the hallway. They are arguing.
he calls her "Maggie." she calls him "Forbes."
Maggie accuses the other Senator of pushing the anti-environmental power bill because the company that stands to profit from it is the chief source of his campaign contributions. She vows to continue fighting his bill and then stalks over to her office, where Michael introduces himself. Maggie is not impressed by Devon's assignment of a bodyguard but she is nice enough about it. Jane informs Maggie that she has a TV interview at KTSM in twenty minutes, and Maggie asks Michael to drive her.
The security guard finds KITT, again parked illegally, and tries again to call in a tow. KITT proceeds to relocate himself while the stunned guard peers in the windows.
now he's not even attempting to be subtle
Maggie and Michael arrive in the parking garage and of course KITT is nowhere to be seen. Michael tries to get Maggie to wait while he finds the car, but Maggie doesn't want to do that so Michael tries to call for KITT very quietly while Maggie is looking away.
because she won't hear him if she's not facing him
Maggie does notice the exchange and Michael just grins at her, feigning innocence.
A maroon sedan driven by a sinister-looking man suddenly lunges toward Maggie and Michael, but KITT jumps out in front of it and the man zooms away. Michael and Maggie hop into KITT and they go on a merry car chase.
During the chase, Maggie inquires as to what it is that Michael keeps calling his car. When Michael says, "It's called KITT," she is momentarily confused and asks, "It's a kit car?" Michael has to clarify that it's not a kit car, it's called KITT.
once again, demoted to an "it"
Michael is somewhat hampered in the chase by his desire to not kill any bystanders, but despite this they almost catch the sedan. It is only the intervention of a convenient semi and the end of the act that allows the sedan to escape.
foiled
With the sedan gone and the second act opening, Michael and Maggie continue on their way. Michael pulls up a video replay and asks KITT to run the sedan's plates. KITT is way ahead of him, but the response from the DMV computers has been delayed. Maggie is delighted to discover that the car talks, but the conversation soon turns.
Michael suggests taking Maggie back to the capitol for her own safety. Maggie insists on doing the interview, refusing to be cowed. Michael has another motive: he can't really do a proper investigation while serving as Maggie's bodyguard/chauffeur.
At the studio, while Maggie is doing the interview, Michael calls Devon and expresses this problem. Devon has an idea about that, and assures Michael that he'll handle it.
Downtown, Forbes and another man are watching Maggie's surprisingly candid and straight-talking interview on the subject of the power bill.
the pinstripes are how you know he is evil
They are Very Concerned, because if Maggie can roust enough public opposition to the bill, the undecided legislators may break for her and the bill may be defeated. The other man (Dixon) says he will deal with Maggie, and Forbes needs to get back to the statehouse and "start twisting some arms" to get the bill through. If the bill is defeated, Dixon promises to support a challenger in Forbes' next election, one who can get things done.
the face of mainstream politics
Maggie and Michael come out of the studio, and Maggie is concerned that she may have appeared to be too pushy. Michael reassures her that she was totally pushy and that it's fine, calling her a "very gutsy lady." They get into KITT and Michael explains about KITT's surveillance mode, and while they drive back to the capitol Maggie recollects that Devon actually told her about the Foundation's supercar, she just had never seen it and had no idea it was so sophisticated. Michael tells her not to flatter KITT, because he might try to show off. KITT objects that he lacks the emotional capacity to respond to flattery, and then he and Maggie have a brief mutual-admiration moment.
They return to the capitol, where Devon is waiting for them. He informs Maggie that a crisis has developed at a conference on democracy that she helped to put together: the discussion group moderator had to cancel and now there is nobody to do it unless Maggie agrees to go to the retreat to do it herself. Maggie sees right through the scheme but she's too invested in the conference to see it fail. Besides which, the vote on the power bill is not until next week. She and Devon scoot off.
They are witnessed as their car leaves the parking garage, and followed.
Hanging around in Maggie's office for no known reason, Michael consults with KITT over the comlink. The report on the sedan's plates just came back, and it was a rental car. Michael is disappointed and rules this a dead end, but KITT is two steps ahead of him and has already pulled the credit card used to rent the car and traced it, discovering that it belonged to one Brian Owendorf.
the smarter team member
Later in the car, Jane tells Michael that it is impossible that Brian was responsible, as he is one of Maggie's oldest and most loyal supporters, and he's an environmental activist. Michael thinks that it is possible that Brian staged the attempt on Maggie's life as a false-flag operation. Jane is skeptical of this line of reasoning.
Jane also asks about Michael's tricked-out dashboard. Michael tells her it's a "little computer gadget" that cuts down on his speeding tickets.
They arrive at the office of "Friends of Mother Earth" and Michael tells Jane to stay in the car. Jane doesn't want to stay in the car alone, so Michael tells her that KITT will keep her company. It's only then that KITT speaks up, miffed at having been referred to as a "little computer gadget." Michael sorta-kinda apologizes and leaves to go in the building, and KITT attempts to make small talk. Jane went to Stanford, according to KITT's information, and some of his components were developed there. He asks if she knows anyone in the engineering department. Jane is not inclined to chat with him.
not at all comfortable with the talking car
Inside the Friends of Mother Earth office, Michael tries to bullshit the receptionist by telling her that he and Brian are old friends and he just dropped by to say hello. She is not buying it.
his cute smile does not deactivate her brain
She tells him to have a seat and goes into Brian's office to announce that some stranger is here claiming to be a buddy. Brian sneaks a peek out the door.
this is exactly what an old friend would do
Needless to say, Brian does not recognize Michael and finds this behavior alarming. He tells the receptionist to stall Michael, and when she goes out to offer Michael something to drink Brian runs out the back. He is not quiet about this; Michael hears the door opening and goes to chase Brian out the back door and through the alley. He calls for KITT to help him box Brian in.
When Jane is startled by KITT starting himself up and pulling away from the curb, KITT helpfully draws her a picture.
KITT gives himself a sleek and sexy avatar, and the humans get blocky stick figures
oh, KITT, you don't have to flatter yourself, nobody is hotter than you
KITT cuts Brian off at the end of the alley and herds him back toward Michael, finally trapping him against a wall. Jane gets out, clearly embarrassed at the way Michael and KITT just ran down her friend, and they have a misunderstanding-clearing conversation. Brian took off, not because he's guilty, but because his organization has been getting threatening phone calls and break-ins and he thought Michael was part of that. His files were destroyed and, crucially to our plot, his credit cards were stolen. Oops!
I used to wear glasses this big, too. :~(
That evening, far away in the countryside in a swank retreat, a lot of foreigners, mainly people of color, are mingling with the white Americans and hoping to get ideas on how to implement democracy in their non-American, non-white home countries.
two women talk democracy
Maggie is surprised by the appearance of the man who was supposed to be the discussion moderator; turns out that the story that he couldn't make it to the conference was a dirty lie by Devon. Maggie is not amused.
Outside the retreat a dude who works for Dixon (Luger) is reporting that everything is under control. Dixon tells him to ensure that Maggie doesn't leave the retreat and to use whatever means necessary. The act ends.
The final act opens the next morning, as Jane comes out onto her back patio to discover that Michael has made her toast and coffee.
he even fetched the paper
She thinks this is very thoughtful of him, and that it's not creepy in the slightest that he apparently broke into her house while she was sleeping, and used her kitchen and the good china she only takes out at Christmas and Easter. The only way this makes any sense is if he slept there the night before, but there was no indication in the last scene that she was planning on inviting him to stay or thought of him positively in the slightest.
Jane has definitely softened on Michael overnight, though, because they engage in friendly small talk and Jane praises Maggie highly to Michael. Their chat is interrupted by the phone, however, and Jane answers it to learn that Forbes pushed the power bill through committee the night before and it is coming to the Senate floor that afternoon. That's ... highly implausible, but this is a show about a talking car that drives itself so let's go with it.
Michael determines to go up to the retreat to fetch Maggie, and tries to call ahead to let Maggie know he's coming. However, he can't get through.
the phone company is not giving this guy a Christmas bonus this year
Luger and some buddies are at work at the perimeter of the retreat. Having cut the phones lines, they reposition themselves to create a roadblock out of their vehicles.
Inside the building, Maggie is giving a vague and milquetoast speech about justice and freedom to an audience of four persons in the most hilariously archetypal Third World regional costumes you could want.
this just makes me lol and lol and lol
Devon is observing; a dude walks in and whispers some info to him but he allows Maggie to finish her lolriffic speech.
Michael and Jane are en route with KITT. Michael is deeply concerned and relates something he learned in the Special Forces - when you cut off someone's communication you cut them off from help.
Maggie confronts Devon about the fact that the phones are dead, and Devon must break it to her that they are, in his words, "under siege." Devon also knows about the roadblock. He feels massively guilty about tricking Maggie into coming to the conference in the first place, but Maggie isn't interested in pointing fingers, she just wants a way out.
KITT blows past the first stage of the roadblock, which is a pickup truck positioned by the side of the road. The men inside wave for Michael to stop, but of course he doesn't. Brilliant tactic, guys. The second stage of the roadblock is up the road a ways.
sure, this'll stop KITT
Jane worries when KITT reports the existence of the roadblock, but Michael does not. He thinks that they'll just have to go over the roadblock.
we laugh in the face of flimsy roadblocks
While Jane screams Michael's name in an orgasm of terror, KITT sails over the blocking cars.
something looks seriously wrong with KITT's front end here
Luger and his friends shoot at the retreating car, but KITT is still bulletproof. The gunfire does alert Maggie that something is up, however, and moments later KITT cruises up to the retreat. Jane gets out and quickly briefs Maggie on the vote situation, and then hustles her into the car. Michael and KITT zoom away with Maggie, going through a fence on the way out for no good reason.
Luger and his buddies have rearranged the roadblock, to make it somewhat longer and less easy to jump. Michael and KITT evade this by simply leaving the road and going around it.
PWNED!
Flabbergasted by this amazing, outside-the-box thinking, Luger and his men get into their cars and give chase. It doesn't take long for KITT to leave them in the dust. Luger calls Dixon.
LOLWTF
Dixon promises to send assistance and tells Luger to at least try to stay on KITT's tail. Luger leaves the road in an attempt to take a short cut.
Meanwhile, KITT has put Michael through to the state police, to whom Michael reports that the foreign dignitaries at the Foundation retreat are under terrorist attack. This call mobilizes the National Guard. Absolutely nothing comes of this.
Luger manages to catch up with KITT and almost cuts them off, but KITT tells Michael to use the rocket boosters so that this doesn't happen. Then KITT locates a dangerous bit of landscape up ahead and directs Michael around it. With the help of KITT's smokescreen feature, Luger soon runs afoul of this ... bush, or something, and flips his car.
However, a helicopter has located them, and it's armed.
Dixon must be running the Shinra ElectricPower Company, for serious
KITT soon notices the chopper and flees across country. He's not sure if he can take a direct hit but he's less concerned about that than about the bridge up ahead, which is vulnerable to the rockets and is too wide to be jumped.
chopper/KITT otp?
The guys in the chopper decide that, since they can't seem to hit KITT with a rocket, Plan B is to try to knock KITT over by bumping him. Because a car that is 45% wider than it is tall is totally going to tip over with ease. And also the laws of physics are different today than they are normally.
After a few desultory bumps, Michael gets it into his head to put KITT on Auto and climb out the roof and onto the chopper's skid.
KITT is wondering how Michael got off the leash
While Maggie gapes in amazement, the chopper climbs with Michael clinging to the skid, and presently it flies over a pond. Michael grabs the guy with the rocket launcher and tosses him into the pond, then does likewise with the pilot. He flies the chopper back to a still-moving KITT and hops down into the car through the still-open roof, while the chopper flies away unmanned to explode behind a hill.
Maggie is thrilled by all the antics; it's very exciting!
Back at the statehouse, Forbes is preparing to go to session when Dixon walks into his office. He has somehow heard that the helicopter gambit failed and that Maggie is on her way. Dixon sends Forbes to the get the vote underway.
Michael, KITT and Maggie enter the city and Maggie notes that session has already started.
On the Senate floor, Forbes is attempting to convince the ... Speaker ... of the Senate ... omg ... that Maggie has withdrawn her opposition to the bill and that voting should move forward immediately. He claims that Maggie is going to skip the vote to save face.
this gentleman of color is the ... Speaker ... of the Senate ... BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHA okay, I like that this is very stereotype-breaking but omg the Speaker of the Senate
KITT drops Michael and Maggie off right at the capitol steps and tells Maggie to "give 'em hell!" before driving off to ... I dunno, find himself a parking place I guess. One that isn't reserved, hopefully.
sex on wheels
Michael and Maggie hustle to session.
legislature floors do not look like this. at all.
Maggie requests to speak on the bill just before the vote is taken. Forbes looks appalled. Dixon tries to sneak out, but Devon is coming up the capitol steps with some cops and Luger, while Michael is coming out the doors behind him. He is trapped and arrested.
the giant gold K is the Belt Buckle of Justice
The epilogue finds Michael and Jane driving in KITT, with Devon crammed in the back seat, and they are chatting with Maggie who is on the phone. They are headed to a victory celebration, one that Maggie cannot attend on account of being in Palm Beach.
Michael's coat and tie are both corduroy this time. what happened to the velveteen? is that only for funerals?
Their self-congratulatory chat is interrupted when Maggie mentions democracy and KITT must insert his definition of it, one that is singularly bad, I might add. He then invites Maggie to discuss various forms of government with him. Michael tells him to stfu.
They have to hang up with Maggie upon reaching the restaurant. After they get out, KITT declines valet parking and parks himself, to the valet's astonishment and everyone else's amusement.
This episode contains a good bit of notable gender commentary, but I need to say this first:
SENATES DO NOT HAVE SPEAKERS OKAY? Senates have Presidents. And legislative floors do not look like those lecture halls where people attend panel discussions. And Michael would never have been allowed on the floor, ever - there would be a gallery for spectators. And not every bill that makes it through committee will come up for a vote. And votes don't work like that, at all. And committees don't meet at night, except for reconciliation committees at the tail end of the term or in other similar emergencies. And legislators do not have arguments in the hallway like high schoolers. And for God's sake, you put on some decent clothes when you're visiting the legislature, Michael. Have some fucking respect.
Right, with that out of the way, let's talk gender regime.
This episode has quite a few women in it, actually. The major ones are, of course, Maggie and her assistant Jane, but we also have Bonnie and Brian's receptionist, and several female delegates are present at the democracy conference, not in speaking roles but serving as a background reminder that women exist and sometimes do things that are important. There are enough women to tell that something mysterious is at work here.
oh, that explains it
We're still operating within some gender constraints, however. Administrative assistants and receptionists are female. Jane is highly uncomfortable with KITT, at least at first ... during KITT's attempt to chat her up while Michael goes into the Friends of Mother Earth office, she looks like she'd rather be anywhere else. KITT does not intrigue her ... he repulses her.
Maggie is an especially interesting case, because she is a very active character and the driver of the plot, but she nevertheless must be reconciled to the feminine ideal. She is referred to as "gutsy" more than once, for instance. It's clearly intended as a compliment, but try for a moment to imagine a male character in the same role being described as "gutsy." Would you describe Michael Knight as gutsy, for instance?
The dialogue following the TV interview is particularly bizarre in this respect, because Maggie asks Michael for reassurance that she wasn't too pushy. While this is a valid concern for a woman in power, on account of the disadvantaging double-standard by which women in power are viewed, it was strange for Maggie as an individual to be worried about this. Nothing else about her character speaks to someone who cares about being seen as excessively pushy.
Her advocacy is inherently nurturing. She wants to protect the people and the environment. In case we were unclear on the take-away, we have Brian Owendorf, the environmentalist guy, as our somewhat mousy-looking example of how a man in this nurturing pursuit might appear. He's small and wears glasses, and he surrenders when run down by KITT. Maggie breeches the female gender regime by being active and strong; Brian breeches the male regime by being passive and weak. They sort of meet in the middle.
The most powerful way in which Maggie Flynn accommodates the feminine ideal is by evading it via the mechanism of being an older woman. Older women get a pass that younger women do not; women who are young or middle-aged have to adhere to certain constraints of passivity and self-effacement and beauty, or else face censure. As a character, Maggie cannot be bound by those constraints, but instead of defying them she instead escapes them through the age loophole. Rather than unsexing herself by being a woman in power, Maggie is instead unsexed first by her age (something outside her control) and is then free to be a woman in power also. The gender constraints, undefied, remain safely in place and are acknowledged via Jane's strict adherence to them.
Incidentally, there is a brief moment during the democracy conference in which Maggie is discussing democracy with a woman of color with no man in sight. This technically passes the Bechdel test. Good job? It's rather unsatisfactory, though, since it is only like 3 lines of dialogue before a man barges into the conversation.
It interested me that KITT said nothing to Jane until Michael positively introduced them. KITT's subordination runs deep. Even though he is hardly making an effort to remain on the qt when he's swapping parking spots under his own power right in front of security and declining valet service, he nevertheless won't introduce himself to strangers.
Despite that, KITT displays a good bit of personal initiative in this episode. He runs the sedan's plates before Michael tells him, and also takes the liberty of running the credit card used to rent it. He butts into a conversation that has nothing to do with him, because he's present and has something he thinks will contribute, just like any normal person might. When assigned to provide Jane with some companionship, he turns it into an opportunity to inquire about Stanford, where parts of him were developed. He is also an integral part of the car chase near the end of the third act; even though Michael is technically driving, KITT tells him what needs to be done and Michael does it.
And that's it for this episode.