Fic : The Plan
Finally got around to posting this - and got a sudden urge to go camping!
Title : The Plan
Author : Andatariel
Rating : NC-17
Pairing : OB/VM
Warning : Smut, fluff
Disclaimer : This is (unfortunately) a work of fiction, none of this really happened. Don’t know them, don’t own them, no profit involved - just for fun!
Feedback : Yes, please!
Summary : Viggo reluctantly takes Orlando camping. Orlando has a plan….
Beta : Big hugs & thanks to PuterPatty for her help, patience, and sense of humour!
Posted : May 2004
Archive : Viggorously, Characters in Bloom, Lj. Others please ask- I’ll most likely say yes.
Viggo
Whatever possessed me to bring Orlando on this camping trip? It seemed like a good idea at the time, but now that we’ve arrived he seems totally out of his element, and I wonder why he agreed to come along in the first place. I also wonder why I ever opened my mouth to ask him, as I’m going to battle keeping my hands off him for two nights. Sure, he’s hugged me and kissed my cheek on numerous occasions, but I’m sure he has no idea of the effect he has on me. He’s always ‘one of the boys’, off clubbing and surfing with the Hobbits, and I’m quite sure he has no interest in any man, particularly a fairly eccentric (or so Henry keeps telling me), older man like me. So why did he agree? Was he worried about losing face in front of Dom and Elijah when I challenged him to a camping weekend while we were chatting about my trips into the woods? Although, with all the supplies and baggage he’s brought, it’s going to be more like home-from-home than a camping trip. Trust the prissy elf to bring all his creature comforts!
Orlando
Wow! I finally managed it! Vig and I are going on a camping trip this weekend. Getting him all to myself, away from any possible interruptions! Part One of ‘The Plan’ is in place, thanks to some careful coaching of ‘Lij and the rest of the Hobbits. Hope this place is very remote or it’s not going to work….
Viggo
So we’ve finally arrived in the forest (New Zealand locals give good directions) and I’ve picked out a good spot in a clearing near the stream. Orlando is muttering under his breath about how far he’s had to carry his bags, and I’m sure I hear “Human scum” and “Filthy Ranger” interspersed in there somewhere.
Orlando
We made it - I didn’t realize we were going so far. I was starting to wonder if I should have brought my passport! Anyway, now it’s time to play ‘poor Orli carrying all the heavy bags; let the big, strong, manly Ranger take care of him.’
Fuck, he’s letting me carry them all by myself. Human scum. Scratch Part Two of ‘The Plan’. Did he have to pick a spot so far from where he parked the truck? And why did I pack so much crap? Oh yes, I remember, it’s all part of ‘The Plan’. Better be worth it!
Viggo
I stretch and inhale deeply. I love to get away from civilization (although Orlando seems to have brought a good deal of it with him) and breathe fresh, clean air. I start to pitch my tent. It’s really too big for me, but I like space - okay, even a Ranger needs a little comfort now and again! My tent has simple, snap-together poles and is soon up and firmly staked to the ground. I look around to see Orlando still struggling to get his tent out of its bag.
“Need some help, elf boy?” I chuckle.
He blushes. “Yes, please.”
Between us we soon get his tent erected (steady, Vig. Bad choice of words there.), and I give him some good-natured teasing about being a ‘city boy’ in spite of his wild streak. His tent is much smaller than mine, and quite flimsy. I know it gets cold here at night and I hope he’s going to be warm enough. I firmly drag my mind away from visions of keeping him warm and start to collect wood for the fire while he stows his bags in his tent. I wonder if there will be enough room in there for him as well….
Orlando
Okay, ‘poor little helpless Orli can’t even put up a tent’ got a good laugh and some help. At least that’s something - Part Three on track.
Viggo
Wood gathered, I build a fire, put a pot of water on to boil for tea, and tell him I’m going to look for more wood for later.
I’ve only been gone five minutes when I hear an almighty crash, a yelp, and several loud curses. I run back to camp to find the whole clearing wreathed in steam. When it clears enough for me to see, Orlando is struggling to escape from the folds of his tent, the fire is out, and the water that was for tea is soaking into the ground. I extricate him, trying not to laugh too much, and ask what happened.
“I tripped over one of the guy ropes and fell onto the tent. I was trying to get up, but I kicked the water over and….” He surveys the scene with a woebegone expression. “I’m really sorry, Vig,” he mutters, blushing deeply.
By this time I am roaring with laughter, with tears rolling down my cheeks. The look on his face is priceless. Okay, maybe carrying a sword around as much as I do has increased my testosterone level, but he’s so out of his element and it’s really bringing out my competitive streak. “So much for your elven grace and agility,” I chortle when I can get the words out. “Let’s look at your tent.”
The tent is beyond repair, and there is no way he can sleep in it. The waterproof fabric is shredded in several places, and two of the supporting poles are snapped. “You’ll have to bunk in my tent, but leave all your bags in what remains of your tent,” I tell him. “There won’t be room for it all in mine.” Then it hits me. I’m going to be sharing a tent with him tonight. I silently pray to whatever gods are listening to take pity on me and help me control myself. I sincerely hope they’re listening.
Orlando
It takes some patience to wait until he’s far enough away before I kick the pot over the fire, pouring some water out before I do so to make sure the flames are extinguished. I then dramatically (thank the gods for Guildhall) yell and throw myself across my tent, making sure I break the pre-weakened poles, tangling myself in the ropes and ripping the fabric as much as possible on the way.
Vig comes charging to the rescue, and I’m surprised he is not rolling on the floor, he is laughing so much. Hope all this is worth the sacrifice of what remains of my dignity.
Viggo
Within a relatively short space of time a new fire is lit, a pot of fresh water is merrily bubbling, and I have rearranged my tent to make space for Orlando - not too close to my own sleeping space.
We sit and drink herbal tea, chatting softly and enjoying the peace of our surroundings. I sketch for a while as he dozes in the sunlight and then lay down my sketchbook and charcoal to start dinner as it’s starting to get dark. I can feel a slight tension in the air as we finish eating and prepare for bed.
Orlando
Okay, we’ve had a very pleasant afternoon and I even got some sleep - need to build up my strength for what I have in mind for tonight. Time for Part Four of ‘The Plan’ - drag Vig off into the trees and have my wicked way with him. Hope this ‘helpless city boy’ scheme works, or he’s going to spend the next year thinking I’m even prissier than Legolas!
Viggo
“Errrm, Vig, where’s the bathroom?”
I roar with laughter again. “There’s a clump of trees over there that looks suitable for the purpose,” I tell him. “And there’s the stream over there.”
“You have to be kidding me!” he gasps. “I thought at least there’d be an ablution block!”
“I told you we were roughing it this weekend, city boy. Are you telling me you can’t cope without hot and cold running water?”
He straightens his shoulders. “I’ll be just fine,” he grits through his teeth. He rummages in his bags and comes out with a flashlight that looks only slightly smaller than the Oscar night spotlights.
“Not much chance of anything sneaking up on you in the dark with that,” I tease him. “You’ll light up the entire forest.”
Just like he lights up my entire life, I think wistfully as he disappears behind the trees. I give myself a mental shake. ‘You’re far too old and world-weary for a twenty three year old human dynamo,’ I tell myself. ‘Now behave!’
A loud screech is followed by Orlando running across the clearing and throwing himself at me. Oh yes, try and behave yourself, Mortensen, when you suddenly have your arms full of the gorgeous young creature who has haunted your every dream and waking moment for months.
“What the hell happened?” I ask him.
“There’s… there’s something out there, behind the trees. It scared me half to death!” he babbles.
I reluctantly disentangle myself from his arms, which are firmly wrapped around me, and take the torch from him to go see what has caused this commotion. I look around for a while on the ground, and suddenly it hits me. I look up and there it is, sitting on a branch, blinking in the torchlight. I grin and call, “Orlando, come here!”
He tiptoes across the clearing and tentatively peers around the tree. I shine the flashlight upwards and show him the owl sitting in the tree. “It’s quite safe now.” I don’t need the light to know he’s blushing deeply - again. Definitely a city boy!
Orlando
I’ve now launched myself into his arms and still nothing! There’s no way I can make a move when all he’s doing is laughing at me. This is going to take some drastic action. I’m sure all those wistful looks and ‘innocent’ touches are not for nothing, and I’ve peeked at his sketchbook when he thinks I’m not looking. There is no way he’s not interested, so what is his problem? Do I have to dance naked around the campfire to get his attention? Okay, I’ll leave that one for an absolutely last resort, especially as he’s already put the fire out!
Viggo
I decide it’s time to turn in for the night, as I don’t think either of us can handle any more excitement. Orlando grabs the torch and starts to dig in his bags again. “What are you looking for now?” I ask exasperatedly.
“My sleeping bag and mattress,” he casually answers over his shoulder.
“Mattress? Mattress?” I can’t believe my ears. I know he brought loads of luggage but I’m pretty sure he can’t be serious!
“Yeah,” he mumbles. Damn, I’ve embarrassed him again, but this is too much fun. “It’s one of those inflatable ones.”
Before long he gives a crow of triumph and pulls out an inflatable mattress. I’m just about to point out to him that there is no way that thing will fit in my tent with both of us in there, when he lets out a moan and pouts. Oh, how I wish he was doing that for me! ‘Stop it, Viggo!’ my inner voice tells me sternly.
He holds up the mattress, showing me where one of the broken tent poles has poked a hole squarely in the middle of it. “Oh well,” he sighs. “I suppose sleeping on the floor won’t kill me.”
“Come on, bedtime.” I tell him. Enough for one night, I think to myself.
Orlando
Okay, so now I’ve made an arse of myself with the pre-punctured mattress, and I’m still no closer! He still hasn’t swept me into his arms to comfort me. What’s a guy gotta do? At least I got myself an invite into his tent, at the expense of making a total fool of myself.
Viggo
I meander around the camp pretending to tidy up for a while, allowing him time to get into his sleeping bag. The prospect of both of us trying to get undressed in the tent at the same time is more than my imagination can handle - and I have a pretty vivid imagination. So I stay outside for ten minutes, before my inner voice can start lecturing me again.
Eventually the cold gets to me and I enter the tent. He’s already snuggled up in his sleeping bag, head on a pillow, and breathing deeply and evenly. I strip to t-shirt and boxers. My inner voice convinces me that he’s not really watching me from under his lashes, it’s just a trick of the torchlight. I slide into my generous, down-filled double sleeping bag, and reach over to turn off the torch.
Orlando
Fuck, he’s such a gentleman that he stayed outside the tent until I couldn’t stall any longer and had to get into my sleeping bag. Still, the next part of ‘The Plan’ (I’ve lost count by now, but still have a few ideas in reserve) might get us both grappling around in very close proximity - ideal circumstances for me to pounce!
Viggo
As I close my eyes, there’s a muffled muttering and groaning coming from the other side of the tent, as well as a rustling noise and a lot of shuffling around. Surely he’s not…? I have to know.
“Orlando, what’s going on?” I whisper.
“There’s a bloody great big rock under my butt,” he grumbles. “And I can’t get comfortable.”
Sighing, I slide out of my sleeping bag and turn on the torch. “Roll over, taking your sleeping bag with you,” I instruct him. I reach down and remove the offending pebble, which must be all of one centimeter in diameter. “Okay, now roll back. Is that better?”
“Mmmmm, thanks Vig. Goodnight,” he mutters, and soon the tent is filled with the sound of his slow, even breathing. I, on the other hand, have very little chance of getting to sleep with the object of my desires sleeping so trustingly within arms’ reach of me. So close and yet so far, as the saying goes. I’m not going to be able to stand another night of this torture so I start to think of ways to cut our weekend short tomorrow.
Orlando
Damn, damn, damn. He made me stay in my sleeping bag and just roll over, instead of letting me get out so I could pretend to stumble and grab him. At least the noises I was making got his attention - I’m pretty sure he thought I was wanking! Time for drastic action.
Viggo
I’m just starting to doze, when there’s a yell and an explosive “Oh fuck!” from the tent’s other occupant, who is frantically wriggling around in his sleeping bag.
“Orlando, what’s going on now?” I shout in frustration. I was so close to actually getting some sleep, and if he’s rolled over onto another pebble I’m going to make him eat it, adorable as he may be.
“My water bottle has leaked inside my sleeping bag and it’s freezing!” he yelps
I take a deep breath.
“What the hell were you doing with your water bottle in your sleeping bag? Are you nuts?” I demand as I snap on the flashlight. I can’t help but chuckle at the sorry sight in front of me, and then catch my breath as my eyes open fully and I take in the glorious view. He’s standing in a white t-shirt and red boxers, holding his dripping sleeping bag and looking so miserable that I just want to hold him tightly. That’s when I notice that the water has made the t-shirt and boxers cling to his every contour, and the t-shirt is transparent, showing off his hard, tight nipples. Before I can start drooling, I realise he’s shivering with the cold.
Reluctantly, I fold back the top of my sleeping bag. “You’d better get those off and get in here before you freeze,” I rasp, swallowing hard. I snap off the flashlight and roll over so my back is to him, glad it’s a large sleeping bag. Can’t have him noticing we could pitch another tent on the erection that is straining the front of my boxers.
“Th… th… thanks, Vig, you’re the best,” he chatters through blue lips, and I tense as I feel him snuggling into the warmth next to me. “I get thirsty during the night and thought if I kept my water bottle close, I wouldn’t wake you up fumbling for it in the dark,” he whispers, sliding his arms around me.
Orlando
Shit, it’s about bloody time! I’m naked in his sleeping bag, albeit blue with cold - that water was fucking freezing, and I had to make sure my t-shirt and boxers were soaked so he could have a good look at me. Okay, and so he’d tell me to take them off…. Oh, man, he’s so warm, and he smells so good, and his body’s so …. Now, this arm goes here, and this one here, and ….
Viggo
Hang on a minute here. Is he sliding his arms around me? I don’t remember that being part of the deal. And them being under my t-shirt was never mentioned, I’m sure. And did I actually hear him breathe “At last….”?
“Mmmmmmm,” he snuffles into my neck, snuggling closer. “You’re so warm.”
I swallow again and try to maintain my composure, although it’s becoming increasingly difficult as his fingers are gently meandering through my chest hairs and his lips are on my neck. Is this my wildest dream, or my worst nightmare? “Orlando…,” I manage to gulp. “Don’t….”
Orlando
Oh, this is where I’ve wanted to be for sooo long. Wait a minute, he’s stiffening up (hopefully all over!). Can’t stop now….
Viggo
“Sssshhhhhhhhhhhh,” he whispers, nibbling my ear as one hand continues to wander over my chest, slowly circling my nipples in turn, while the other drifts down my stomach to slide under the waistband of my boxers and grasp my throbbing cock. He slides the boxers down my hips until I can kick them off. I can feel his obvious arousal pressing and sliding against the crease of my ass. I can’t breathe, but I manage to expel the last of the air in my lungs in a low groan.
He leans partway up on one elbow, and as I turn my head he captures my mouth with his, tongue sliding against my lips and begging for entrance, which is willingly granted. I feel my inner voice, which has been screaming at me to stop this now, disappear into the distance. I surrender to desire and turn in his arms to press myself firmly against him while he strips my t-shirt off over my head.
I can feel that he is as aroused as I am and we kiss for a while, his hand still firmly but slowly stroking my cock. I can’t help but return the favour, and soon we are both sighing and moaning into our kisses, bodies writhing against each other as the slow dance turns into a blaze of urgent passion.
Orlando
Man, can Vig kiss! I had no idea he would be this good! I stroke him, my hand sliding in the precum that is oozing from the tip of his impressive erection, and he’s doing the same to me. Oh, this is going to be so good - I have to have him.… NOW! Thank God I remembered to bring the lube I had stashed in my sleeping bag over here with me.
Viggo
Gasping, he tears his lips from mine. “Vig, I need you so badly,” he pants in my ear. “Need you inside me. NOW!” He stretches behind him with one arm, and suddenly I feel my fingers being coated in cool liquid. Before I can wonder where the lube came from, he’s grabbed my hand and is dragging it down his body, blatantly thrusting his hips and grinding his pulsing cock against my hip while he slicks lube over my aching need. I slide one finger slowly into him, giving him a moment to adjust.
“Don’t wait,” he rasps, voice roughened by the urgency of his need. “I’m ready.”
In spite of his assurance, I take a few moments more to prepare him, slowly stretching him. As I stroke over his prostate, he arches off the floor and babbles incoherently. I continue stroking and stretching him, leaning down to drown in his kisses again and again.
Orlando
Exquisite torture. He’s taking his time to open me - I’m beyond caring, beyond rational thought. If he doesn’t fuck me now, I’m gonna….
Viggo
“Now, Vig. Please, now,” he gasps, wrenching his mouth from mine, and I wrap his legs around my waist, positioning myself at his entrance. Holding my breath, I push slowly against him and slide into the clenching velvet heat. He stiffens for a second before relaxing and tightening his legs around me, pulling me in deeper. “Oooooooh, so good,” he moans as I pull him up into another kiss. His tongue thrusts into my mouth and I take that as a signal to mirror his movements with my cock. I surrender to sensation, the softness of his lips, the slickness of his tongue, the intense heat of his body gripping mine. I start to thrust harder and faster, sliding one hand under his buttocks to lift him, changing the angle so I brush over his prostate with every movement.
He is writhing and moaning beneath me, and I am groaning and gasping with every drive of my hips as he pushes back into my every thrust. I reach down to stroke his dripping cock, and he starts to unravel beneath me.
“God, yes, Vig…. Fuck…. Close, so close,” he moans, and I am right there with him. I give one final thrust, driving into his shuddering body, roaring his name in the depths of my release as he screams my name, pulsing and coating my hand and his stomach with his pearly essence. I collapse on top of him, trying to breathe and feeling his body rippling around me, milking the last of my orgasm from me.
Orlando
That has to have been the most awesome, incredible, amazing orgasm I’ve ever had. Worth everything I’ve been through today, and then some! I have to hang on to this man! He’s the most generous man, the most beautiful soul, and the best lover anyone could wish for. This can’t just be a one-night stand. I think I could seriously fall in love with him. Did I just say the ‘l’ word??? Well, Orli, would it be so bad? With him? I need to know how he feels, but I know for sure he has reservations. Don’t let him start thinking now - don’t spoil the moment.
Viggo
“Orlando, I….”
He puts the fingers of one hand to my lips as he uses the other to clean us gently with his wet t-shirt and whispers, “Tomorrow. Sleep now.” I slide out of him and roll us onto our sides, still entwined, and we fall asleep in each other’s arms.
Orlando
Hmmm … he’s still asleep. Do I wake him up for a morning shag, or do I get up? So cozy and warm…. No, Orli, behave! This is not how ‘The Plan’ goes! Get up, tidy the camp, and make him breakfast. Time to come clean - hope he understands, and that last night meant as much to him as it did to me. I raid the goodies I have hidden in my tent and start breakfast.
Viggo
I open my eyes to the sounds of birds singing. I’m alone in the tent, so I fumble around in the bottom of the sleeping bag with my feet until I find my boxers, slide them on again and, taking a deep breath, step outside the door of the tent. I can smell coffee on the fresh morning air.
“Good morning, sunshine!” Orlando bounds to his feet from where he is crouching over the fire, which he has obviously lit, and strides across the grass to sweep me into his arms and devour me with a kiss. “Coffee’s ready and breakfast is not far behind.”
I look around the immaculate campsite in confusion. The coffeepot is on the fire, while a delicious smell of eggs comes from the pan on the Primus stove. Hang on, I didn’t bring a primus stove!
“What the hell is going on here?” I ask. “Yesterday you couldn’t move without falling over your own feet and today you are making breakfast on… where the hell did that Primus come from?”
Orlando
Okay, here goes with the explanations…. Hope the deities that helped me last night are still on my side. Hope he understands!
Viggo
He grins at me, blushing a little.
“I had to find a way to make a move on you, so I thought if I played the helpless city boy you’d take pity on me,” he admits.
I look at him sternly. “So the tent, the falling, the water, the whole thing was a plot to get into my sleeping bag?” I’m awestruck at the depth of his plan.
“Well, I knew you’d never make a move of your own accord, and I was tired of you ignoring all the hints I gave you, so I decided to take matters into my own hands. It wasn’t too hard once I primed the Hobbits to bring camping into one of our conversations.” He grins again, mischievously. “I hope you’re not angry with me.”
“Only because I woke up alone this morning,” I grin back, pulling him into another hug and planting a kiss on those luscious and oh-so-kissable lips. “I quite fancied the idea of a morning romp in the fresh air.”
Orlando
Ohhh, there was at least one god smiling on me!!! “Hold on, I’ll turn off the eggs.”
Viggo
I know there are still issues to resolve and obstacles to overcome, but in the morning sunlight, with Orlando in my arms and his smiling face pressed to mine, those obstacles suddenly don’t seem so big after all.
Orlando
YEEEHAAAA! IT WORKED! I’ve got him - and he’s all mine! I know we have things to discuss and realities to face, but for right here, right now, and as long as I can hold on, he’s mine. And no matter what, I don’t intend to let go.
Ends
Title : The Plan
Author : Andatariel
Rating : NC-17
Pairing : OB/VM
Warning : Smut, fluff
Disclaimer : This is (unfortunately) a work of fiction, none of this really happened. Don’t know them, don’t own them, no profit involved - just for fun!
Feedback : Yes, please!
Summary : Viggo reluctantly takes Orlando camping. Orlando has a plan….
Beta : Big hugs & thanks to PuterPatty for her help, patience, and sense of humour!
Posted : May 2004
Archive : Viggorously, Characters in Bloom, Lj. Others please ask- I’ll most likely say yes.
Viggo
Whatever possessed me to bring Orlando on this camping trip? It seemed like a good idea at the time, but now that we’ve arrived he seems totally out of his element, and I wonder why he agreed to come along in the first place. I also wonder why I ever opened my mouth to ask him, as I’m going to battle keeping my hands off him for two nights. Sure, he’s hugged me and kissed my cheek on numerous occasions, but I’m sure he has no idea of the effect he has on me. He’s always ‘one of the boys’, off clubbing and surfing with the Hobbits, and I’m quite sure he has no interest in any man, particularly a fairly eccentric (or so Henry keeps telling me), older man like me. So why did he agree? Was he worried about losing face in front of Dom and Elijah when I challenged him to a camping weekend while we were chatting about my trips into the woods? Although, with all the supplies and baggage he’s brought, it’s going to be more like home-from-home than a camping trip. Trust the prissy elf to bring all his creature comforts!
Orlando
Wow! I finally managed it! Vig and I are going on a camping trip this weekend. Getting him all to myself, away from any possible interruptions! Part One of ‘The Plan’ is in place, thanks to some careful coaching of ‘Lij and the rest of the Hobbits. Hope this place is very remote or it’s not going to work….
Viggo
So we’ve finally arrived in the forest (New Zealand locals give good directions) and I’ve picked out a good spot in a clearing near the stream. Orlando is muttering under his breath about how far he’s had to carry his bags, and I’m sure I hear “Human scum” and “Filthy Ranger” interspersed in there somewhere.
Orlando
We made it - I didn’t realize we were going so far. I was starting to wonder if I should have brought my passport! Anyway, now it’s time to play ‘poor Orli carrying all the heavy bags; let the big, strong, manly Ranger take care of him.’
Fuck, he’s letting me carry them all by myself. Human scum. Scratch Part Two of ‘The Plan’. Did he have to pick a spot so far from where he parked the truck? And why did I pack so much crap? Oh yes, I remember, it’s all part of ‘The Plan’. Better be worth it!
Viggo
I stretch and inhale deeply. I love to get away from civilization (although Orlando seems to have brought a good deal of it with him) and breathe fresh, clean air. I start to pitch my tent. It’s really too big for me, but I like space - okay, even a Ranger needs a little comfort now and again! My tent has simple, snap-together poles and is soon up and firmly staked to the ground. I look around to see Orlando still struggling to get his tent out of its bag.
“Need some help, elf boy?” I chuckle.
He blushes. “Yes, please.”
Between us we soon get his tent erected (steady, Vig. Bad choice of words there.), and I give him some good-natured teasing about being a ‘city boy’ in spite of his wild streak. His tent is much smaller than mine, and quite flimsy. I know it gets cold here at night and I hope he’s going to be warm enough. I firmly drag my mind away from visions of keeping him warm and start to collect wood for the fire while he stows his bags in his tent. I wonder if there will be enough room in there for him as well….
Orlando
Okay, ‘poor little helpless Orli can’t even put up a tent’ got a good laugh and some help. At least that’s something - Part Three on track.
Viggo
Wood gathered, I build a fire, put a pot of water on to boil for tea, and tell him I’m going to look for more wood for later.
I’ve only been gone five minutes when I hear an almighty crash, a yelp, and several loud curses. I run back to camp to find the whole clearing wreathed in steam. When it clears enough for me to see, Orlando is struggling to escape from the folds of his tent, the fire is out, and the water that was for tea is soaking into the ground. I extricate him, trying not to laugh too much, and ask what happened.
“I tripped over one of the guy ropes and fell onto the tent. I was trying to get up, but I kicked the water over and….” He surveys the scene with a woebegone expression. “I’m really sorry, Vig,” he mutters, blushing deeply.
By this time I am roaring with laughter, with tears rolling down my cheeks. The look on his face is priceless. Okay, maybe carrying a sword around as much as I do has increased my testosterone level, but he’s so out of his element and it’s really bringing out my competitive streak. “So much for your elven grace and agility,” I chortle when I can get the words out. “Let’s look at your tent.”
The tent is beyond repair, and there is no way he can sleep in it. The waterproof fabric is shredded in several places, and two of the supporting poles are snapped. “You’ll have to bunk in my tent, but leave all your bags in what remains of your tent,” I tell him. “There won’t be room for it all in mine.” Then it hits me. I’m going to be sharing a tent with him tonight. I silently pray to whatever gods are listening to take pity on me and help me control myself. I sincerely hope they’re listening.
Orlando
It takes some patience to wait until he’s far enough away before I kick the pot over the fire, pouring some water out before I do so to make sure the flames are extinguished. I then dramatically (thank the gods for Guildhall) yell and throw myself across my tent, making sure I break the pre-weakened poles, tangling myself in the ropes and ripping the fabric as much as possible on the way.
Vig comes charging to the rescue, and I’m surprised he is not rolling on the floor, he is laughing so much. Hope all this is worth the sacrifice of what remains of my dignity.
Viggo
Within a relatively short space of time a new fire is lit, a pot of fresh water is merrily bubbling, and I have rearranged my tent to make space for Orlando - not too close to my own sleeping space.
We sit and drink herbal tea, chatting softly and enjoying the peace of our surroundings. I sketch for a while as he dozes in the sunlight and then lay down my sketchbook and charcoal to start dinner as it’s starting to get dark. I can feel a slight tension in the air as we finish eating and prepare for bed.
Orlando
Okay, we’ve had a very pleasant afternoon and I even got some sleep - need to build up my strength for what I have in mind for tonight. Time for Part Four of ‘The Plan’ - drag Vig off into the trees and have my wicked way with him. Hope this ‘helpless city boy’ scheme works, or he’s going to spend the next year thinking I’m even prissier than Legolas!
Viggo
“Errrm, Vig, where’s the bathroom?”
I roar with laughter again. “There’s a clump of trees over there that looks suitable for the purpose,” I tell him. “And there’s the stream over there.”
“You have to be kidding me!” he gasps. “I thought at least there’d be an ablution block!”
“I told you we were roughing it this weekend, city boy. Are you telling me you can’t cope without hot and cold running water?”
He straightens his shoulders. “I’ll be just fine,” he grits through his teeth. He rummages in his bags and comes out with a flashlight that looks only slightly smaller than the Oscar night spotlights.
“Not much chance of anything sneaking up on you in the dark with that,” I tease him. “You’ll light up the entire forest.”
Just like he lights up my entire life, I think wistfully as he disappears behind the trees. I give myself a mental shake. ‘You’re far too old and world-weary for a twenty three year old human dynamo,’ I tell myself. ‘Now behave!’
A loud screech is followed by Orlando running across the clearing and throwing himself at me. Oh yes, try and behave yourself, Mortensen, when you suddenly have your arms full of the gorgeous young creature who has haunted your every dream and waking moment for months.
“What the hell happened?” I ask him.
“There’s… there’s something out there, behind the trees. It scared me half to death!” he babbles.
I reluctantly disentangle myself from his arms, which are firmly wrapped around me, and take the torch from him to go see what has caused this commotion. I look around for a while on the ground, and suddenly it hits me. I look up and there it is, sitting on a branch, blinking in the torchlight. I grin and call, “Orlando, come here!”
He tiptoes across the clearing and tentatively peers around the tree. I shine the flashlight upwards and show him the owl sitting in the tree. “It’s quite safe now.” I don’t need the light to know he’s blushing deeply - again. Definitely a city boy!
Orlando
I’ve now launched myself into his arms and still nothing! There’s no way I can make a move when all he’s doing is laughing at me. This is going to take some drastic action. I’m sure all those wistful looks and ‘innocent’ touches are not for nothing, and I’ve peeked at his sketchbook when he thinks I’m not looking. There is no way he’s not interested, so what is his problem? Do I have to dance naked around the campfire to get his attention? Okay, I’ll leave that one for an absolutely last resort, especially as he’s already put the fire out!
Viggo
I decide it’s time to turn in for the night, as I don’t think either of us can handle any more excitement. Orlando grabs the torch and starts to dig in his bags again. “What are you looking for now?” I ask exasperatedly.
“My sleeping bag and mattress,” he casually answers over his shoulder.
“Mattress? Mattress?” I can’t believe my ears. I know he brought loads of luggage but I’m pretty sure he can’t be serious!
“Yeah,” he mumbles. Damn, I’ve embarrassed him again, but this is too much fun. “It’s one of those inflatable ones.”
Before long he gives a crow of triumph and pulls out an inflatable mattress. I’m just about to point out to him that there is no way that thing will fit in my tent with both of us in there, when he lets out a moan and pouts. Oh, how I wish he was doing that for me! ‘Stop it, Viggo!’ my inner voice tells me sternly.
He holds up the mattress, showing me where one of the broken tent poles has poked a hole squarely in the middle of it. “Oh well,” he sighs. “I suppose sleeping on the floor won’t kill me.”
“Come on, bedtime.” I tell him. Enough for one night, I think to myself.
Orlando
Okay, so now I’ve made an arse of myself with the pre-punctured mattress, and I’m still no closer! He still hasn’t swept me into his arms to comfort me. What’s a guy gotta do? At least I got myself an invite into his tent, at the expense of making a total fool of myself.
Viggo
I meander around the camp pretending to tidy up for a while, allowing him time to get into his sleeping bag. The prospect of both of us trying to get undressed in the tent at the same time is more than my imagination can handle - and I have a pretty vivid imagination. So I stay outside for ten minutes, before my inner voice can start lecturing me again.
Eventually the cold gets to me and I enter the tent. He’s already snuggled up in his sleeping bag, head on a pillow, and breathing deeply and evenly. I strip to t-shirt and boxers. My inner voice convinces me that he’s not really watching me from under his lashes, it’s just a trick of the torchlight. I slide into my generous, down-filled double sleeping bag, and reach over to turn off the torch.
Orlando
Fuck, he’s such a gentleman that he stayed outside the tent until I couldn’t stall any longer and had to get into my sleeping bag. Still, the next part of ‘The Plan’ (I’ve lost count by now, but still have a few ideas in reserve) might get us both grappling around in very close proximity - ideal circumstances for me to pounce!
Viggo
As I close my eyes, there’s a muffled muttering and groaning coming from the other side of the tent, as well as a rustling noise and a lot of shuffling around. Surely he’s not…? I have to know.
“Orlando, what’s going on?” I whisper.
“There’s a bloody great big rock under my butt,” he grumbles. “And I can’t get comfortable.”
Sighing, I slide out of my sleeping bag and turn on the torch. “Roll over, taking your sleeping bag with you,” I instruct him. I reach down and remove the offending pebble, which must be all of one centimeter in diameter. “Okay, now roll back. Is that better?”
“Mmmmm, thanks Vig. Goodnight,” he mutters, and soon the tent is filled with the sound of his slow, even breathing. I, on the other hand, have very little chance of getting to sleep with the object of my desires sleeping so trustingly within arms’ reach of me. So close and yet so far, as the saying goes. I’m not going to be able to stand another night of this torture so I start to think of ways to cut our weekend short tomorrow.
Orlando
Damn, damn, damn. He made me stay in my sleeping bag and just roll over, instead of letting me get out so I could pretend to stumble and grab him. At least the noises I was making got his attention - I’m pretty sure he thought I was wanking! Time for drastic action.
Viggo
I’m just starting to doze, when there’s a yell and an explosive “Oh fuck!” from the tent’s other occupant, who is frantically wriggling around in his sleeping bag.
“Orlando, what’s going on now?” I shout in frustration. I was so close to actually getting some sleep, and if he’s rolled over onto another pebble I’m going to make him eat it, adorable as he may be.
“My water bottle has leaked inside my sleeping bag and it’s freezing!” he yelps
I take a deep breath.
“What the hell were you doing with your water bottle in your sleeping bag? Are you nuts?” I demand as I snap on the flashlight. I can’t help but chuckle at the sorry sight in front of me, and then catch my breath as my eyes open fully and I take in the glorious view. He’s standing in a white t-shirt and red boxers, holding his dripping sleeping bag and looking so miserable that I just want to hold him tightly. That’s when I notice that the water has made the t-shirt and boxers cling to his every contour, and the t-shirt is transparent, showing off his hard, tight nipples. Before I can start drooling, I realise he’s shivering with the cold.
Reluctantly, I fold back the top of my sleeping bag. “You’d better get those off and get in here before you freeze,” I rasp, swallowing hard. I snap off the flashlight and roll over so my back is to him, glad it’s a large sleeping bag. Can’t have him noticing we could pitch another tent on the erection that is straining the front of my boxers.
“Th… th… thanks, Vig, you’re the best,” he chatters through blue lips, and I tense as I feel him snuggling into the warmth next to me. “I get thirsty during the night and thought if I kept my water bottle close, I wouldn’t wake you up fumbling for it in the dark,” he whispers, sliding his arms around me.
Orlando
Shit, it’s about bloody time! I’m naked in his sleeping bag, albeit blue with cold - that water was fucking freezing, and I had to make sure my t-shirt and boxers were soaked so he could have a good look at me. Okay, and so he’d tell me to take them off…. Oh, man, he’s so warm, and he smells so good, and his body’s so …. Now, this arm goes here, and this one here, and ….
Viggo
Hang on a minute here. Is he sliding his arms around me? I don’t remember that being part of the deal. And them being under my t-shirt was never mentioned, I’m sure. And did I actually hear him breathe “At last….”?
“Mmmmmmm,” he snuffles into my neck, snuggling closer. “You’re so warm.”
I swallow again and try to maintain my composure, although it’s becoming increasingly difficult as his fingers are gently meandering through my chest hairs and his lips are on my neck. Is this my wildest dream, or my worst nightmare? “Orlando…,” I manage to gulp. “Don’t….”
Orlando
Oh, this is where I’ve wanted to be for sooo long. Wait a minute, he’s stiffening up (hopefully all over!). Can’t stop now….
Viggo
“Sssshhhhhhhhhhhh,” he whispers, nibbling my ear as one hand continues to wander over my chest, slowly circling my nipples in turn, while the other drifts down my stomach to slide under the waistband of my boxers and grasp my throbbing cock. He slides the boxers down my hips until I can kick them off. I can feel his obvious arousal pressing and sliding against the crease of my ass. I can’t breathe, but I manage to expel the last of the air in my lungs in a low groan.
He leans partway up on one elbow, and as I turn my head he captures my mouth with his, tongue sliding against my lips and begging for entrance, which is willingly granted. I feel my inner voice, which has been screaming at me to stop this now, disappear into the distance. I surrender to desire and turn in his arms to press myself firmly against him while he strips my t-shirt off over my head.
I can feel that he is as aroused as I am and we kiss for a while, his hand still firmly but slowly stroking my cock. I can’t help but return the favour, and soon we are both sighing and moaning into our kisses, bodies writhing against each other as the slow dance turns into a blaze of urgent passion.
Orlando
Man, can Vig kiss! I had no idea he would be this good! I stroke him, my hand sliding in the precum that is oozing from the tip of his impressive erection, and he’s doing the same to me. Oh, this is going to be so good - I have to have him.… NOW! Thank God I remembered to bring the lube I had stashed in my sleeping bag over here with me.
Viggo
Gasping, he tears his lips from mine. “Vig, I need you so badly,” he pants in my ear. “Need you inside me. NOW!” He stretches behind him with one arm, and suddenly I feel my fingers being coated in cool liquid. Before I can wonder where the lube came from, he’s grabbed my hand and is dragging it down his body, blatantly thrusting his hips and grinding his pulsing cock against my hip while he slicks lube over my aching need. I slide one finger slowly into him, giving him a moment to adjust.
“Don’t wait,” he rasps, voice roughened by the urgency of his need. “I’m ready.”
In spite of his assurance, I take a few moments more to prepare him, slowly stretching him. As I stroke over his prostate, he arches off the floor and babbles incoherently. I continue stroking and stretching him, leaning down to drown in his kisses again and again.
Orlando
Exquisite torture. He’s taking his time to open me - I’m beyond caring, beyond rational thought. If he doesn’t fuck me now, I’m gonna….
Viggo
“Now, Vig. Please, now,” he gasps, wrenching his mouth from mine, and I wrap his legs around my waist, positioning myself at his entrance. Holding my breath, I push slowly against him and slide into the clenching velvet heat. He stiffens for a second before relaxing and tightening his legs around me, pulling me in deeper. “Oooooooh, so good,” he moans as I pull him up into another kiss. His tongue thrusts into my mouth and I take that as a signal to mirror his movements with my cock. I surrender to sensation, the softness of his lips, the slickness of his tongue, the intense heat of his body gripping mine. I start to thrust harder and faster, sliding one hand under his buttocks to lift him, changing the angle so I brush over his prostate with every movement.
He is writhing and moaning beneath me, and I am groaning and gasping with every drive of my hips as he pushes back into my every thrust. I reach down to stroke his dripping cock, and he starts to unravel beneath me.
“God, yes, Vig…. Fuck…. Close, so close,” he moans, and I am right there with him. I give one final thrust, driving into his shuddering body, roaring his name in the depths of my release as he screams my name, pulsing and coating my hand and his stomach with his pearly essence. I collapse on top of him, trying to breathe and feeling his body rippling around me, milking the last of my orgasm from me.
Orlando
That has to have been the most awesome, incredible, amazing orgasm I’ve ever had. Worth everything I’ve been through today, and then some! I have to hang on to this man! He’s the most generous man, the most beautiful soul, and the best lover anyone could wish for. This can’t just be a one-night stand. I think I could seriously fall in love with him. Did I just say the ‘l’ word??? Well, Orli, would it be so bad? With him? I need to know how he feels, but I know for sure he has reservations. Don’t let him start thinking now - don’t spoil the moment.
Viggo
“Orlando, I….”
He puts the fingers of one hand to my lips as he uses the other to clean us gently with his wet t-shirt and whispers, “Tomorrow. Sleep now.” I slide out of him and roll us onto our sides, still entwined, and we fall asleep in each other’s arms.
Orlando
Hmmm … he’s still asleep. Do I wake him up for a morning shag, or do I get up? So cozy and warm…. No, Orli, behave! This is not how ‘The Plan’ goes! Get up, tidy the camp, and make him breakfast. Time to come clean - hope he understands, and that last night meant as much to him as it did to me. I raid the goodies I have hidden in my tent and start breakfast.
Viggo
I open my eyes to the sounds of birds singing. I’m alone in the tent, so I fumble around in the bottom of the sleeping bag with my feet until I find my boxers, slide them on again and, taking a deep breath, step outside the door of the tent. I can smell coffee on the fresh morning air.
“Good morning, sunshine!” Orlando bounds to his feet from where he is crouching over the fire, which he has obviously lit, and strides across the grass to sweep me into his arms and devour me with a kiss. “Coffee’s ready and breakfast is not far behind.”
I look around the immaculate campsite in confusion. The coffeepot is on the fire, while a delicious smell of eggs comes from the pan on the Primus stove. Hang on, I didn’t bring a primus stove!
“What the hell is going on here?” I ask. “Yesterday you couldn’t move without falling over your own feet and today you are making breakfast on… where the hell did that Primus come from?”
Orlando
Okay, here goes with the explanations…. Hope the deities that helped me last night are still on my side. Hope he understands!
Viggo
He grins at me, blushing a little.
“I had to find a way to make a move on you, so I thought if I played the helpless city boy you’d take pity on me,” he admits.
I look at him sternly. “So the tent, the falling, the water, the whole thing was a plot to get into my sleeping bag?” I’m awestruck at the depth of his plan.
“Well, I knew you’d never make a move of your own accord, and I was tired of you ignoring all the hints I gave you, so I decided to take matters into my own hands. It wasn’t too hard once I primed the Hobbits to bring camping into one of our conversations.” He grins again, mischievously. “I hope you’re not angry with me.”
“Only because I woke up alone this morning,” I grin back, pulling him into another hug and planting a kiss on those luscious and oh-so-kissable lips. “I quite fancied the idea of a morning romp in the fresh air.”
Orlando
Ohhh, there was at least one god smiling on me!!! “Hold on, I’ll turn off the eggs.”
Viggo
I know there are still issues to resolve and obstacles to overcome, but in the morning sunlight, with Orlando in my arms and his smiling face pressed to mine, those obstacles suddenly don’t seem so big after all.
Orlando
YEEEHAAAA! IT WORKED! I’ve got him - and he’s all mine! I know we have things to discuss and realities to face, but for right here, right now, and as long as I can hold on, he’s mine. And no matter what, I don’t intend to let go.
Ends