what s wrong with me

[angelhsent]

my goodness i am so suprised at myself writing in my journal 2 days in a row. I don't feel in the christmas spirit and was wondering if there is something wrong with me maybe it has to do with the loss of my mother i am not sure. I was always excitied around christmas time but this year it doesn't feel right

Comments

[adgam_ga]

I'm with you, girl! I know exactly how you feel. After the second & third miscarriages (Sept. '01 & last June) I'm so NOT feeling the holiday spirit at all. Stan and I have been trying so hard to get pregnant again and I'm completely stressed out that its not happening!!

And, oh, I'm so dreading this Christmas Eve when his family has their annual family get-togther... I was supposed to be 7 months pregnant this Christmas, and when I had found out that I was pregnant last time, I went around to everyone saying that I would be a little round Christmas ornament for Christmas... But noooo... I'm big & round, yes, but not because I'm pregnant -- but because I'm friggin fat! And to make matters worse, two of my husband's cousins just had baby girls. So when I go to the family party I have to be subjected to all the cooing and awwing over the new babies! It just totally totally sucks! You know what I mean?

Christmas? Bah Humbug, I say! I'm going to get good and shitfaced at the party!