It's a long, hard battle you're fighting angelo, just be sure to not give up. The time I've spent with you and your girls I've seen you do an amazing job at being supportive of Alli and her decisions, and I'm proud of you for not saying any of the concerns you've had in front of the girls. I know how hard it get's for you sometimes. I feel it too. I've watched your heart shatter when Aurora or Athena say "Mom said I can't do this/bring this/ have this here because it's 'dad's place'." or "Mom won't let me bring that here" or "Mom said to make sure Athena brings back this pair of shoes because they're hers". Mine breaks oo. I want to SCREAM at the top of my lungs how unfair that behaviour is, how adults shouldn't be making a child even think "hmmm, I better not wear that/bring that because mom will make me put it back/change my clothes." SHITTY THING TO DO TO A CHILD. PERIOD
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You are my pillar of love and hope in a sea of insanity. You are an amazing mother. I love you beyond words, thoughts, expressions. thank you for loving them so very much.
In a way I am not surprised to hear this issue come up. It was/is an issue for us and for my other friends who share custody of their children. And it is ridiculous (almost humorous
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We have gleaned an innumerable amount of insight from what you've said in the past and current. I'm really grateful that you reach out to us this way. Amazingly so. Thank you so much.
I found myself using the Dad's house Dad's rules idea in the last few weeks and I directly attribute that to previous conversations with you. It's a good way of helping them understand that it works a different way here than there and such.
I will have to consider your solution to the problem since it does hinge on logic. For now I'm just buying more clothes and letting Aurora wear what she wants becuase that's my ideal for her.
But yeah, it sucks and is something that if you hadn't experienced you would think was laughable - how could a parent do something like that to their own kid? It's ludicrous, right?
Not that I know anything about parenting, but from a purely neutral standpoint, the "mommy's rules/daddy's rules" thing might be very important to set up now as a precedent
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When it comes to kids, if they really want to do something they're going to do it anyway. If you stand in their way they'll push harder just to spite you.
I'd rather the determination for making a decision to come from more than simply desire and/or rebellion.
They're gonna break the rules whatever they are unless they agree with the rules and understand why they exist. Sometimes they gotta break a rule to understand the value and rules ought to be a communication between the parent and the child. Their guidelines, like, here's what I expect from you and why.
When a child is old enough to challenge a rule on its merit alone it's probably time for discussion.
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I found myself using the Dad's house Dad's rules idea in the last few weeks and I directly attribute that to previous conversations with you. It's a good way of helping them understand that it works a different way here than there and such.
I will have to consider your solution to the problem since it does hinge on logic. For now I'm just buying more clothes and letting Aurora wear what she wants becuase that's my ideal for her.
But yeah, it sucks and is something that if you hadn't experienced you would think was laughable - how could a parent do something like that to their own kid? It's ludicrous, right?
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I'd rather the determination for making a decision to come from more than simply desire and/or rebellion.
They're gonna break the rules whatever they are unless they agree with the rules and understand why they exist. Sometimes they gotta break a rule to understand the value and rules ought to be a communication between the parent and the child. Their guidelines, like, here's what I expect from you and why.
When a child is old enough to challenge a rule on its merit alone it's probably time for discussion.
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