School Year Reflections
Well, school's been over for about five days now. I figure it's time to work on my annual end of the year reflections.
I must say this year was how I predicted it to be only on a slightly smaller degree. It wasn't as bad as eighth grade but it certainly was close. It went by too fast for it be like eighth grade. I'm almost possitive if it went by any slower it would have been a repeating of then.
It went by very fast. Too fast. It was too fast to even enjoy. It seems like just a week ago I was sitting at band camp in the BK listening to Styx with Boots. That was one of happier moments of this school year, but it doesn't seem like it was almost a year ago.
Life needs to slow down for me. As life goes on they say time moves faster. I don't want it to move this fast. I barely had any time to enjoy it. This school year I'm not counting events by time but by events this year. Everything is blended together to seem like a week.
First event I'm judging life by is Matt and Homecoming. A week before Homecoming Matt and I totally stopped talking until about a month after Elisha and I went down. Homecoming... just there in this time line.
Second event I'm judging my life by is Disney and Josh. They happened within a week or two so they get their own spot on the time line. Disney was kick ass and Josh was my first experience with boys period.
Third event happens about four weeks down the road from Josh. We'll label that as Kristina pulls an Alex. Stabbing me in the back, betraying my trust, and stealing a boy. Oh, and I never found any of this out until I walk in on Josh and Kris holding hands. The first time I'd seen my best friend in a few weeks. Great, eh?
Fourth event on the line of time is what I like to to call Crash and Burn. Now, for most of the year I'd seen this coming. I knew it would have to come eventually. This was unavoidable and even now it still upsets me to think about. This is me and Elisha's fall out. I use this event most often when thinking of my school year. I say things to myself like "Was that before me and Elisha died?" or "Was Elisha still in my life when that happened?" It's a very sad event to look back on... very sad. I still cry about it every now and then.
Fifth event is really two mixed into one again. We'll just label this one Parker. It's the most recent and most happy out of my timeline. Now, let's see what happens around this one, shall we? I meet Parker, obivously, on March 11th. Somewhere between April 12th and May 12th I end my year long, unhealthy, creepy obsession with Boots. And on April 12th me and Parker start dating.
Looking back on the last few months of school I think of Parker and Elisha. Looking back on the-summer-to-be I will hopefully only think of Parker and happy things. No offense to Elisha but it hurts too much to look back a lot on your event.
All in all, this school year was a thinly sugar coated eighth grade. I grew a lot, I learned a lot, and I'm a better person. I'm still a push over, I still trust people way too easy, but I don't ignore as many things, I'm stronger, and I've definiatly changed for the better.
I hope for this summer and next school year it will be better than my freshman year. I think a pattern is going on in my life. One bad, one good, one bad, one good. Well, I'm on one good so lets hope Junior year will be the best! =)
I must say this year was how I predicted it to be only on a slightly smaller degree. It wasn't as bad as eighth grade but it certainly was close. It went by too fast for it be like eighth grade. I'm almost possitive if it went by any slower it would have been a repeating of then.
It went by very fast. Too fast. It was too fast to even enjoy. It seems like just a week ago I was sitting at band camp in the BK listening to Styx with Boots. That was one of happier moments of this school year, but it doesn't seem like it was almost a year ago.
Life needs to slow down for me. As life goes on they say time moves faster. I don't want it to move this fast. I barely had any time to enjoy it. This school year I'm not counting events by time but by events this year. Everything is blended together to seem like a week.
First event I'm judging life by is Matt and Homecoming. A week before Homecoming Matt and I totally stopped talking until about a month after Elisha and I went down. Homecoming... just there in this time line.
Second event I'm judging my life by is Disney and Josh. They happened within a week or two so they get their own spot on the time line. Disney was kick ass and Josh was my first experience with boys period.
Third event happens about four weeks down the road from Josh. We'll label that as Kristina pulls an Alex. Stabbing me in the back, betraying my trust, and stealing a boy. Oh, and I never found any of this out until I walk in on Josh and Kris holding hands. The first time I'd seen my best friend in a few weeks. Great, eh?
Fourth event on the line of time is what I like to to call Crash and Burn. Now, for most of the year I'd seen this coming. I knew it would have to come eventually. This was unavoidable and even now it still upsets me to think about. This is me and Elisha's fall out. I use this event most often when thinking of my school year. I say things to myself like "Was that before me and Elisha died?" or "Was Elisha still in my life when that happened?" It's a very sad event to look back on... very sad. I still cry about it every now and then.
Fifth event is really two mixed into one again. We'll just label this one Parker. It's the most recent and most happy out of my timeline. Now, let's see what happens around this one, shall we? I meet Parker, obivously, on March 11th. Somewhere between April 12th and May 12th I end my year long, unhealthy, creepy obsession with Boots. And on April 12th me and Parker start dating.
Looking back on the last few months of school I think of Parker and Elisha. Looking back on the-summer-to-be I will hopefully only think of Parker and happy things. No offense to Elisha but it hurts too much to look back a lot on your event.
All in all, this school year was a thinly sugar coated eighth grade. I grew a lot, I learned a lot, and I'm a better person. I'm still a push over, I still trust people way too easy, but I don't ignore as many things, I'm stronger, and I've definiatly changed for the better.
I hope for this summer and next school year it will be better than my freshman year. I think a pattern is going on in my life. One bad, one good, one bad, one good. Well, I'm on one good so lets hope Junior year will be the best! =)