Hmm...
So, I ran into Yuna as she was arriving. Nothing more to say about that, really.
Um...
No word on those two, either. We should probably get to Deling soon. If only...holy shit, Timber's boring. And, we're not getting anything accomplished. Other than...increasing annoyance... I just don't sit still well.
I'd really like to know why the Fayth sent Yuna here. This just...big...big...big...fucking sign over it all saying DANGER. Or, BAD SHIT. Well, I know that she said there was something dark coming up, but I wanna know what it is.
Like Tidus and I can't take care of it or something. I'm almost...personally offended.
And, that, "I don't care" tagline, really trying to keep it true. It's hard to do. She was a good friend at one point. Now...
It does bother me. I screwed them both over, both of the girls, that is. Yuna trusted me, and Aeris isn't coming back. I don't know how to move past it. At all. And, now we have to, I guess.
I just don't know what to make of it all. I know that it was Tidus' decision to end up with me, but...I feel like it's a fluke, like, if he was given a real decision, he would have ended up with her.
I wonder if she just pushed him away.
Part of me doesn't want to think about it. I love him, really, I've been happy with him, and I just want to be happy. Hmm...maybe I'm just not used to being in that state. I keep trying to tell myself not to mess things up, but, I don't know if that's just my own paranoia or not.
And, I don't want to screw things up. This up, that is. It's like, getting another chance to try to make something right. ...not like I can make things right with Aeris. I just want to prove...to myself, and to him, that I can take care of him. I think I need that.
I need to know that I'm not just worthless dead weight. That's what I felt like with Aeris.
I have too many issues.
Kid, I wish you'd start responding to my stuff again.
Um...
No word on those two, either. We should probably get to Deling soon. If only...holy shit, Timber's boring. And, we're not getting anything accomplished. Other than...increasing annoyance... I just don't sit still well.
I'd really like to know why the Fayth sent Yuna here. This just...big...big...big...fucking sign over it all saying DANGER. Or, BAD SHIT. Well, I know that she said there was something dark coming up, but I wanna know what it is.
Like Tidus and I can't take care of it or something. I'm almost...personally offended.
And, that, "I don't care" tagline, really trying to keep it true. It's hard to do. She was a good friend at one point. Now...
It does bother me. I screwed them both over, both of the girls, that is. Yuna trusted me, and Aeris isn't coming back. I don't know how to move past it. At all. And, now we have to, I guess.
I just don't know what to make of it all. I know that it was Tidus' decision to end up with me, but...I feel like it's a fluke, like, if he was given a real decision, he would have ended up with her.
I wonder if she just pushed him away.
Part of me doesn't want to think about it. I love him, really, I've been happy with him, and I just want to be happy. Hmm...maybe I'm just not used to being in that state. I keep trying to tell myself not to mess things up, but, I don't know if that's just my own paranoia or not.
And, I don't want to screw things up. This up, that is. It's like, getting another chance to try to make something right. ...not like I can make things right with Aeris. I just want to prove...to myself, and to him, that I can take care of him. I think I need that.
I need to know that I'm not just worthless dead weight. That's what I felt like with Aeris.
I have too many issues.
Kid, I wish you'd start responding to my stuff again.