Awww...

[anthrokeight]

An email from an internet friend:

"I keep forgetting you're not gay.  I say this with love."

Comments

[f4f3]

If it becomes a majority position, you might have to ask yourself some hard questions.

[anthrokeight]

Yeeeah, no, I don't really think it takes much question asking to figure out what it means that people think I am gay when I don't particularly want to do teh sechks with other ladies. I think Kinsey would tell me I am 2, maybe.

This was a gay internet friend's comment, and was sweet. But usually it's young people or people who are puzzled/indignant that I don't appear to fit a handy category. Or they are well meaning diverse adults who don't make broad assumptions about people.

Also, I can think of three close female friends who are straight or mostly straight to whom this happens regularly, which suggests it's A Social Phenomenon Thing. Unless you're trying to tell me that I have repressed gaydar?

Before you tell me I doth protest too much, I am on board with a sex-educator friend of mine who says that when you have spent as much time single as we have, you have plenty of time to figure out what you really like/want. Which is why this is all so interesting, really.

[f4f3]

I am not trying to tell you anything - perish the thought. I was identified as gay at school by quite a few fellow pupils, and even some friends. The signs were clear - my glottal stop was marginal, I wore glasses, I read books, and, most dammingly, I liked spending time with women.

And I think you're as aware as I was that this says some really interesting things about the people who have that perception, and very little to do with you.