Shame and Money.

[antithestasia]

"There is no shame in asking for help." This is is the mantra of every well-wisher, every good friend, every concerned party. They assure you that it takes a great and wise man to acknowledge his own fallibility and reach out for assistance. These people are kind, caring, and oblivious to the overwhelming, crushing shame of actually asking for

Comments

[thelastmehina]

Be grateful you have such friends. I don't know of anyone I'm not related to by blood whom I could ask for that large an amount and be sure of receiving it.

And most of life's lessons are only going to be learned the hard way.

Lastly, there is nothing to be ashamed of something done out of love - both the asking and the giving.

[antithestasia]

I did not expect to get it. I asked because they were the only people in my life that I was close to for whom such a sum would not be a strain. I considered asking a good friend that I knew would say yes, but it would strain her. If something happens and I am unable to repay these people, I will be very distraught, but they will not even notice. If I failed to pay back the other friend, she would not be able to cover an important expense.

[michaelocalypse]

A true friend sees that the 'unimportant means to an end' is also a source of pain and suffering to countless people. I've borrowed more than that from people closer to me, and yes, it was awful, but I grew and learned more from that experience than any other when it comes to personal finance.

You've never had a class on this, because we don't effing make them, but long story short, meet your friend's eyes, and you will see that they don't judge you based on your ignorance of things that nobody bothered to teach us all.

<3

[antithestasia]

It shames me that I made my problem their problem. While I think they will forgive me for it, it still... well, brings me shame.

[dgchessman2]

You know... I went (and am still) in a terribly difficult situation. Something that I've been handling fairly well, but has been hard regardless.

But there came a day when I couldn't forge my own path on things anymore. I just... couldn't. I had to ask my family for help.

And you know what? They were mostly mad that it took me so damn long...

[antithestasia]

My family would be exasperated, I think. They do not have faith in my maturity, and any failing on my part serves as justification for this.

[dgchessman2]

Ugh. I'm sorry to hear that...

*slides you over a cookie by way of apology*

I mean... I don't know you terribly well, but you'd be somebody I'd be happy to consider family.

[antithestasia]

Cookie nom nom nom.

[antithestasia]

Lady Henry, I was looking at your avatar, trying to figure out who you were, and then I saw your name at the bottom, and just thought to myself, "of course." Thank you, dear.

[d34dm34t]

Never date anybody in Long Beach without playing strip poker with them at least twice. You can never tell what they're really packing downstairs, and sometimes a few of them will change, on a whim.

Also, you may not view it as such yet, but you're basically offering "the gift of giving." Does it not bring you joy, when you're in a position to help somebody who truly appreciates it, and choose to do so? What makes you think they would feel any differently? Sharing a sense of intertwined purpose can be fulfilling in ways one might not ever expect otherwise.

Now, knowing there may be no way to reciprocate, on the other hand... that can be a harrowing experience; but I doubt that is the case, here.

[antithestasia]

I offer "the gift of giving" when I mention to my friends that I need new D&D dice. This is a bit extreme.

[d34dm34t]

That's only asking a small favor. This is asking for HELP. And now, you know the difference. All you have to do, to remain honorable, is be willing to do the same yourself whenever you're in a position to.

Civilization didn't happen on accident, you know. ;)

[antithestasia]

Haha, I like that bit about civilization. Well put.