Book Review - The X-Rated Bible: An Irreverent Survey of Sex in the Scriptures
Title: The X-Rated Bible: An Irreverent Survey of Sex in the Scriptures
Author: Ben Edward Akerley
Number of Pages: 245
Genre: religion, humour
Book Number: 42
Review: I haven't been writing up reviews to post this year, but I'd like to get back to doing that. Maybe not for every book I read, but for some of the more memorable ones, and this book certainly falls into the category of memorable.
For instance, do you know the origin of the words "testify" and "testament"?? I certainly didn't until reading this book (and then Googling around to make sure it was accurate). It comes from the "penis-shake".
[...] the man swearing an oath would grasp the penis or the testicles or both of the other male as part of the affirmation. [...] In English, both our words "testify" and "testament" are linguistically related to this quaint custom of swearing an oath.
I'm willing to bet that most of you just learned something new right now.
Keeping in line with the testicle theme...
In discussing the role of eunuchs in the Bible, Akerley introduces a bit of information on some of the customs/practices of early church followers who have taken certain passages of the Bible to heart.
This account was written by Lucian of Samosata.
I shall narrate what they do. Any young man who has resolved on this action [self-castration], strips off his clothes and with a loud shout bursts into the midst of the crowd and picks up a sword from a number of swords which I suppose have been kept ready for many years for this purpose. He takes it and castrates himself, and runs wild through the city bearing in his hands what he has cut off. He casts it into any house at will, and from this house he receives women's rainment and ornament.
I don't know about you guys, but if some guy throws his severed junk into my house, I'm not thinking I'm going to be sending back jewelry. But, that might just be me. Also, I'm rather curious about how one is able to do such a thing to ones body and still run through the streets looking for an open window. I'd be on the ground crying like a baby, personally.
And, to end on a lighter, but no less irreverent note, I found this really funny for no reason in particular.
We now turn to Jesus' mother Mary, the Immaculate Conception, and the Virgin Birth.
The best reduction I have ever encountered of this preposterous ecclesiastical fairy tale sums it all up very neatly. The Virgin Mary gave birth to the little babe Jesus, the innocent lamb of God destined to be slain for the sins of all humankind. Consequently, Christian theology at its simplest and most fundamental level boils down to this very basic formula: Mary had a little lamb!
There you have it, folks. It doesn't get more basic than that.
Author: Ben Edward Akerley
Number of Pages: 245
Genre: religion, humour
Book Number: 42
Review: I haven't been writing up reviews to post this year, but I'd like to get back to doing that. Maybe not for every book I read, but for some of the more memorable ones, and this book certainly falls into the category of memorable.
For instance, do you know the origin of the words "testify" and "testament"?? I certainly didn't until reading this book (and then Googling around to make sure it was accurate). It comes from the "penis-shake".
[...] the man swearing an oath would grasp the penis or the testicles or both of the other male as part of the affirmation. [...] In English, both our words "testify" and "testament" are linguistically related to this quaint custom of swearing an oath.
I'm willing to bet that most of you just learned something new right now.
Keeping in line with the testicle theme...
In discussing the role of eunuchs in the Bible, Akerley introduces a bit of information on some of the customs/practices of early church followers who have taken certain passages of the Bible to heart.
This account was written by Lucian of Samosata.
I shall narrate what they do. Any young man who has resolved on this action [self-castration], strips off his clothes and with a loud shout bursts into the midst of the crowd and picks up a sword from a number of swords which I suppose have been kept ready for many years for this purpose. He takes it and castrates himself, and runs wild through the city bearing in his hands what he has cut off. He casts it into any house at will, and from this house he receives women's rainment and ornament.
I don't know about you guys, but if some guy throws his severed junk into my house, I'm not thinking I'm going to be sending back jewelry. But, that might just be me. Also, I'm rather curious about how one is able to do such a thing to ones body and still run through the streets looking for an open window. I'd be on the ground crying like a baby, personally.
And, to end on a lighter, but no less irreverent note, I found this really funny for no reason in particular.
We now turn to Jesus' mother Mary, the Immaculate Conception, and the Virgin Birth.
The best reduction I have ever encountered of this preposterous ecclesiastical fairy tale sums it all up very neatly. The Virgin Mary gave birth to the little babe Jesus, the innocent lamb of God destined to be slain for the sins of all humankind. Consequently, Christian theology at its simplest and most fundamental level boils down to this very basic formula: Mary had a little lamb!
There you have it, folks. It doesn't get more basic than that.