[One-shot] Breaking The (Writer's) Block (Metafandom)
Title: Breaking The (Writer's) Block
Fandoms: Mostly Prince of Tennis. Mentions of Hikaru no Go, Full Metal Alchemist and Nodame Cantabile.
Characters: The author. PoT: Tezuka, Fuji, Eiji, Saeki, Oshitari.
Others including mentions: HnG: Hikaru, Akira, Isumi, Yang Hai, Sai, Waya. FMA: Ed, Roy. Nodame: Chiaki, Nodame, Stressemann; PoT: Sengoku, Sanada, Kabaji, Mizuki, Kirihara.
Genre/Rating: Humor / Gen
Wordcount: Circa 1330 words.
Warnings: Fuji's innuendo, go, hot chocolate, oblique mention of Sanada, oblique mention of the Playground, tennis, conductor's batons, wasabi, PoT OVA, "kitten", alchemy, Bleach fansubs.
Summary: A fanfiction writer takes a break from writing and runs into the muses in her head. My attempt at busting writer's block with humor. Beta-ed by they-who-shall-remain-nameless (out of shame, I'm sure).
The writer stretched her legs, rubbed her eyes, and sighed loudly. The computer screen continued to shine merrily, the text window on it containing two lines of text. The two lines had been typed an hour ago. They had been deleted, and typed back again. They had been restructured, and other words had been added and removed. They had even been joined together as one sentence for about two minutes and three seconds.
So far, though, they had not been joined by any other lines.
The writer stretched, coughed lightly, and then took off her glasses. She leaned backwards, hands over her eyes, and stayed that way awhile. Then she stood, and stretched, and left to make some hot chocolate in the kitchen.
Fuji, one of her more annoying muses, was standing there beside her electric kettle. He smiled at her, and she felt a rise of irritation. "How goes the writing?" he said.
"Shut up," she muttered, walking straight past him towards the kettle.
Fuji's gentle laugh sounded behind her. "How scary," he said gently.
Damn him, she thought. He wasn't the least bit intimidated.
"Fuji," Tezuka, another muse, spoke up. The writer turned her head to see Tezuka facing Fuji with a stern look. Fuji returned it, an utterly unrepentant sparkle in his eyes.
"Now now, Tezuka. She needs to loosen up." The innuendo made the writer twitch.
"Your way does not help matters any."
"Oh? How is yours helping, Tezuka?"
"Hoi," Eiji said. The other muses made way for the new arrival. "Fuji, you should be nice to her. She's writing fics for you, and people like those fics, nya."
"She isn't even writing about our fandom right now, Eiji. She's writing about go."
"So? I let Oishi do other things, Fuji, and you let Tezuka. Why shouldn't the writer?"
The writer reached up, taking the tin of hot chocolate down from the cupboard, her back to the muses. "Apples and oranges, Eiji, but thank you. Aren't you in the fic too?"
"Heh," Eiji said, and the writer could visualize the grin she presumed was on Eiji's face. A drawer was opened, and a spoon retrieved. "I'm only there because of Fuji, nya."
"Aa."
The writer shook her head as she spooned hot chocolate into a cup. "Tezuka, you really need to stop being so taciturn. The OVA shows you as much less of a clam, you know."
"I say what needs to be said and nothing more."
The writer turned, frowning at the three muses. "Writing any fic that has character interaction becomes even harder with you if there is any dialogue involved. You do realize this means you only get the Halcyon Days fics, and lots of time with Sengoku."
Tezuka seemed to shrug even without moving. "I enjoy his company."
Fuji nudged Eiji. "Not as much as you enjoy Sanada's."
"I am sure you would too."
The writer scrutinized Tezuka's face, but there did not seem to be any change besides the slight twitch of an eyebrow. "Boys, boys," she said as Fuji opened his mouth. "Stop it. I don't need you quarelling in my head. It's difficult enough with the go games going on. I mean, really. Look at them."
Four heads turned to where Hikaru and Akira were playing go while Waya and Sai looked on. Isumi and Yang Hai sat further away, their own heads bent over another goban.
"Ha! Now I've got you, Touya!" Hikaru said, laying down a stone and then grinning at Akira over the game.
"Perhaps ... " Akira said, and then he laid down another stone. Sai smiled, Waya started to snicker, and Akira continued, " ... not."
Further away, the older boys were not as distinctly audible. "... that stone lives, then I can proceed here, and here," Isumi said as Yang Hai consulted a kifu.
"Ha, try it, Isumi, I know exactly what I'd do."
The writer shook her head with a sigh, and turned to refill the electric kettle. Behind her, the three tennis muses continued to talk. Eiji tilted his head a little and watched the HnG muses, then looked back at the writer. "They're quiet and behaving themselves, nya. What's wrong with that?"
"She thinks about the outcome of every game, Eiji, and then she analyzes important moves and how they would affect each of them. Much like she did with your tennis match."
"Hoi," Eiji said, and he shrugged. "It's just fun, nya. So what if she writes silly short pieces no one else reads? Her friends do, and that's enough, isn't it?"
"Something that is worth doing is worth doing well."
"So serious, Tezuka. I shall remember to repeat that line to Tanya-san's Sanada muse when I next see him."
The writer could feel the shift and intensity of Tezuka's displeasure. "You will not."
"A-ha," Eiji said. The writer set the kettle down and flipped the power switch, setting it to boil. She turned around in time to see Fuji and Eiji, grinning at a visibly annoyed Tezuka. "You just feel uncomfortable because she's writing another Tezuke piece, hehe. Do you really want to be called 'kitten' that badly?"
Fuji chuckled as Tezuka turned and walked away to watch the Isumi-Yang Hai go discussion. The older boys welcomed him, and then continued to discuss the game. "I think you hurt his feelings, Eiji."
"Play nice, boys," the writer warned, and she cast another glance over at the go games. "At least they're behaving themselves."
As if to prove her wrong, a shout rang out. "You ASSHOLE!" There was a flash of blue light, and the sound of transmutation reached their ears. Another shout. "Full Metal, undo my hands at once!"
The writer rubbed her temples, and closed her eyes. "Please tell me that wasn't Ed shouting at Roy."
"That wasn't Ed shouting at Roy," Fuji said.
"Don't lie, Fuji, it isn't nice," Eiji said.
The writer decided she didn't want to know. She turned back, facing the kitchen counter, resolutely ignoring everything else. That lasted five seconds.
"Oh, baby!" The German-accented and horribly pronounced words made her cringe.
"Stressemann-san looks like he's having fun," the writer heard Fuji say. "Chiaki-san and Nodame-chan don't, though. My, I didn't know you could do that with a baton."
The writer paled, and her hand shook before she set down the tin and took a deep breath. I don't want to know. I don't need to know, she told herself.
"Saeki-san," Eiji greeted as two more presences made themselves known. The writer felt movement beside her.
"Would you like some help with that?"
The Kansai accent was unmistakable. She turned, and Oshitari smiled down at her. "Such a gentleman," the writer said, and she gave Oshitari a smile. "Thank you, but I don't need the help."
"Just ask if you do," Oshitari said, and he smiled back before returning his attention to his fellow muses.
"What were you doing with Oshitari?" Fuji asked Saeki.
"Do you really want to know?" Saeki said.
"Would I ask if I didn't?"
"Gentlemen do not kiss and tell," Oshitari said, smoothly.
Saeki spluttered. "We were NOT doing anything of the sort."
"Of course not," Fuji said. The writer turned to see Fuji giving Saeki a smile that spoke volumes of what Fuji thought of THAT denial.
Just then, the kettle whistled and then shut off. Relieved, the writer poured the hot water into her cup and stirred, enjoying the smell of hot chocolate. The hot cup warmed her hands.
"Wasabi would wake you up," Fuji's voice said helpfully from behind her.
The writer didn't even bother to defend the cup. "If you put wasabi in my hot chocolate, Fuji Shuusuke, I will personally see to it that Kabaji, Mizuki, and Kirihara are given free reign to do anything they want to you. In the Playground, perhaps."
Saeki and Eiji laughed, and Oshitari looked amused as Fuji blinked and retracted his hand. Fuji recovered very quickly, though. "Maa, it might be fun."
The writer raised an eyebrow, and then shook her head. "That's it. I'm going to watch Bleach fansubs."
"Have fun!" Eiji said, and grinned, pouncing on Fuji. As the writer closed her door, she could hear Eiji's voice, still. "Nya, Fuji, let's have a match with Saeki and Oshitari."
---
Please comment if you read this! <3
Fandoms: Mostly Prince of Tennis. Mentions of Hikaru no Go, Full Metal Alchemist and Nodame Cantabile.
Characters: The author. PoT: Tezuka, Fuji, Eiji, Saeki, Oshitari.
Others including mentions: HnG: Hikaru, Akira, Isumi, Yang Hai, Sai, Waya. FMA: Ed, Roy. Nodame: Chiaki, Nodame, Stressemann; PoT: Sengoku, Sanada, Kabaji, Mizuki, Kirihara.
Genre/Rating: Humor / Gen
Wordcount: Circa 1330 words.
Warnings: Fuji's innuendo, go, hot chocolate, oblique mention of Sanada, oblique mention of the Playground, tennis, conductor's batons, wasabi, PoT OVA, "kitten", alchemy, Bleach fansubs.
Summary: A fanfiction writer takes a break from writing and runs into the muses in her head. My attempt at busting writer's block with humor. Beta-ed by they-who-shall-remain-nameless (out of shame, I'm sure).
The writer stretched her legs, rubbed her eyes, and sighed loudly. The computer screen continued to shine merrily, the text window on it containing two lines of text. The two lines had been typed an hour ago. They had been deleted, and typed back again. They had been restructured, and other words had been added and removed. They had even been joined together as one sentence for about two minutes and three seconds.
So far, though, they had not been joined by any other lines.
The writer stretched, coughed lightly, and then took off her glasses. She leaned backwards, hands over her eyes, and stayed that way awhile. Then she stood, and stretched, and left to make some hot chocolate in the kitchen.
Fuji, one of her more annoying muses, was standing there beside her electric kettle. He smiled at her, and she felt a rise of irritation. "How goes the writing?" he said.
"Shut up," she muttered, walking straight past him towards the kettle.
Fuji's gentle laugh sounded behind her. "How scary," he said gently.
Damn him, she thought. He wasn't the least bit intimidated.
"Fuji," Tezuka, another muse, spoke up. The writer turned her head to see Tezuka facing Fuji with a stern look. Fuji returned it, an utterly unrepentant sparkle in his eyes.
"Now now, Tezuka. She needs to loosen up." The innuendo made the writer twitch.
"Your way does not help matters any."
"Oh? How is yours helping, Tezuka?"
"Hoi," Eiji said. The other muses made way for the new arrival. "Fuji, you should be nice to her. She's writing fics for you, and people like those fics, nya."
"She isn't even writing about our fandom right now, Eiji. She's writing about go."
"So? I let Oishi do other things, Fuji, and you let Tezuka. Why shouldn't the writer?"
The writer reached up, taking the tin of hot chocolate down from the cupboard, her back to the muses. "Apples and oranges, Eiji, but thank you. Aren't you in the fic too?"
"Heh," Eiji said, and the writer could visualize the grin she presumed was on Eiji's face. A drawer was opened, and a spoon retrieved. "I'm only there because of Fuji, nya."
"Aa."
The writer shook her head as she spooned hot chocolate into a cup. "Tezuka, you really need to stop being so taciturn. The OVA shows you as much less of a clam, you know."
"I say what needs to be said and nothing more."
The writer turned, frowning at the three muses. "Writing any fic that has character interaction becomes even harder with you if there is any dialogue involved. You do realize this means you only get the Halcyon Days fics, and lots of time with Sengoku."
Tezuka seemed to shrug even without moving. "I enjoy his company."
Fuji nudged Eiji. "Not as much as you enjoy Sanada's."
"I am sure you would too."
The writer scrutinized Tezuka's face, but there did not seem to be any change besides the slight twitch of an eyebrow. "Boys, boys," she said as Fuji opened his mouth. "Stop it. I don't need you quarelling in my head. It's difficult enough with the go games going on. I mean, really. Look at them."
Four heads turned to where Hikaru and Akira were playing go while Waya and Sai looked on. Isumi and Yang Hai sat further away, their own heads bent over another goban.
"Ha! Now I've got you, Touya!" Hikaru said, laying down a stone and then grinning at Akira over the game.
"Perhaps ... " Akira said, and then he laid down another stone. Sai smiled, Waya started to snicker, and Akira continued, " ... not."
Further away, the older boys were not as distinctly audible. "... that stone lives, then I can proceed here, and here," Isumi said as Yang Hai consulted a kifu.
"Ha, try it, Isumi, I know exactly what I'd do."
The writer shook her head with a sigh, and turned to refill the electric kettle. Behind her, the three tennis muses continued to talk. Eiji tilted his head a little and watched the HnG muses, then looked back at the writer. "They're quiet and behaving themselves, nya. What's wrong with that?"
"She thinks about the outcome of every game, Eiji, and then she analyzes important moves and how they would affect each of them. Much like she did with your tennis match."
"Hoi," Eiji said, and he shrugged. "It's just fun, nya. So what if she writes silly short pieces no one else reads? Her friends do, and that's enough, isn't it?"
"Something that is worth doing is worth doing well."
"So serious, Tezuka. I shall remember to repeat that line to Tanya-san's Sanada muse when I next see him."
The writer could feel the shift and intensity of Tezuka's displeasure. "You will not."
"A-ha," Eiji said. The writer set the kettle down and flipped the power switch, setting it to boil. She turned around in time to see Fuji and Eiji, grinning at a visibly annoyed Tezuka. "You just feel uncomfortable because she's writing another Tezuke piece, hehe. Do you really want to be called 'kitten' that badly?"
Fuji chuckled as Tezuka turned and walked away to watch the Isumi-Yang Hai go discussion. The older boys welcomed him, and then continued to discuss the game. "I think you hurt his feelings, Eiji."
"Play nice, boys," the writer warned, and she cast another glance over at the go games. "At least they're behaving themselves."
As if to prove her wrong, a shout rang out. "You ASSHOLE!" There was a flash of blue light, and the sound of transmutation reached their ears. Another shout. "Full Metal, undo my hands at once!"
The writer rubbed her temples, and closed her eyes. "Please tell me that wasn't Ed shouting at Roy."
"That wasn't Ed shouting at Roy," Fuji said.
"Don't lie, Fuji, it isn't nice," Eiji said.
The writer decided she didn't want to know. She turned back, facing the kitchen counter, resolutely ignoring everything else. That lasted five seconds.
"Oh, baby!" The German-accented and horribly pronounced words made her cringe.
"Stressemann-san looks like he's having fun," the writer heard Fuji say. "Chiaki-san and Nodame-chan don't, though. My, I didn't know you could do that with a baton."
The writer paled, and her hand shook before she set down the tin and took a deep breath. I don't want to know. I don't need to know, she told herself.
"Saeki-san," Eiji greeted as two more presences made themselves known. The writer felt movement beside her.
"Would you like some help with that?"
The Kansai accent was unmistakable. She turned, and Oshitari smiled down at her. "Such a gentleman," the writer said, and she gave Oshitari a smile. "Thank you, but I don't need the help."
"Just ask if you do," Oshitari said, and he smiled back before returning his attention to his fellow muses.
"What were you doing with Oshitari?" Fuji asked Saeki.
"Do you really want to know?" Saeki said.
"Would I ask if I didn't?"
"Gentlemen do not kiss and tell," Oshitari said, smoothly.
Saeki spluttered. "We were NOT doing anything of the sort."
"Of course not," Fuji said. The writer turned to see Fuji giving Saeki a smile that spoke volumes of what Fuji thought of THAT denial.
Just then, the kettle whistled and then shut off. Relieved, the writer poured the hot water into her cup and stirred, enjoying the smell of hot chocolate. The hot cup warmed her hands.
"Wasabi would wake you up," Fuji's voice said helpfully from behind her.
The writer didn't even bother to defend the cup. "If you put wasabi in my hot chocolate, Fuji Shuusuke, I will personally see to it that Kabaji, Mizuki, and Kirihara are given free reign to do anything they want to you. In the Playground, perhaps."
Saeki and Eiji laughed, and Oshitari looked amused as Fuji blinked and retracted his hand. Fuji recovered very quickly, though. "Maa, it might be fun."
The writer raised an eyebrow, and then shook her head. "That's it. I'm going to watch Bleach fansubs."
"Have fun!" Eiji said, and grinned, pouncing on Fuji. As the writer closed her door, she could hear Eiji's voice, still. "Nya, Fuji, let's have a match with Saeki and Oshitari."
---
Please comment if you read this! <3