a white and crumbling princess

[apsaraqueen]

     i have no friggin' clue where this came from. but i'm kind of freaked out by wherever that place is. written for sm_monthly.

Title: A White and Crumbling Princess
 Theme: Nineteen
Genre: Dark/Drama
Version: AU/Manga-ish
Rating: PG-13

Comments

[cbrandtwright]

There are no words. Seriously, the juxtaposition of the whole piece leaves me speechless. So, I'll leave it at that.

[apsaraqueen]

thank you so much! the end kind of left me speechless too, because believe it or not, this started as fluff.

...

really.

[sea_thoughts]

So I'm not quite sure what is going on here but it's beautiful and terrible at the same time, a fitting tribute to the classical world.

[apsaraqueen]

thank you! this is my au-ish version of silmil, and i like to draw a fair bit of inspiration from aspects of the shitennou's respective kingdoms in their characters...hence zoi the pre-celtic king. lol. here, of course, he's already been turned by beryl, and mercury doesn't realize it until it's too late :(

[sea_thoughts]

Ah, right. I got a little confused, I thought it was Kunzite and Venus at first but then it didn't seem like a conversation they would have and then you mentioned Zoisite and Mercury at the end.

[ext_455456]

awesome! love how Zoicite used Mercury as a sacrifice to remain in power...he must hv alot of women died that way, she's definitely not the first or last. its sad how she didnt even get to finish her sentence..and how he killed her like a most experienced soldier..i guess ami kept her hair short later on to remind herself to be cautious to men? i think you've got a whole SilMil saga there! cant wait for more of Kun/Mina!

[apsaraqueen]

no, she's definitely not the first nor will she be the last. in my freaky silmil, zoi's older sister was sacrificed so that the gods his parents worshiped would ostensibly bring their only son good fortune and make him king of his territory. ugh, creepy. but he didn't know what was going on since he was just a kid, and it's haunted him since. now that beryl's got him, he has no regrets doing the same thing to gain power if he can.

and yeah, i wanted to slyly work in a reason why her hair might be shorter than everyone else's ;) thanks for your lovely comment!

[ellorgast]

Whoa. This started out as the usual "meeting on Earth for sexytimes" story and turned into something entirely different. I admit I was also slightly confused, and had to reread the last several paragraphs a few times to understand what was going on (I'm guessing the "druid princess" is the statue?). But still, what a haunting scenario! Zoisite as executioner? Sacrificing to the gods? Holy shit. And the braiding as part of the ritual! She had no idea until it was too late!

[apsaraqueen]

yes, yes she is. i'm thinking of changing that line, maybe to "lost stone princess" or something like that. i know that it's terribly confusing, and to be honest, i'm not sure how to fix that without taking away the building sense of "wtf is going on here?" if you have any suggestions, i would love to hear them, because i seriously struggled with that while writing it, and eventually just gave up/flailed around/posted without thought for consequences :O thanks for commenting!

[ellorgast]

I think if you just dropped a few more hints earlier on, it might flow better. I found that I spent too much time trying to figure out who the characters were to appreciate the situation.

It's still super-awesome, though! As always, I love your rich details and totally original ideas.

[apsaraqueen]

i think i'll do that. there's actually no point in hiding who the characters are here, anyway...when i start writing it's all "he" and "she" because it flows faster...and i find myself adding in names last. definitely failed to do that this time. thanks spirit!! :D

[decadent_east]

You don't know me at all. I'm a long time lurker at other writers' livejournals, and I just found this last night. I couldn't comment last night because I had to think about my tl;dr reply. Sorry for the rabid fangirling and length. ^_^;;

First, I have to say that I've loved A/Z with the passionate burning of a thousand suns for over a decade. This was... I'm not sure that I really have the words to describe it.

So many times I've read a story and am only able to come away with the sense that only an image or sentence or feeling was right. Here though! The building sense of warning. The stillness in the scene that drew the tension almost unbearably tight. The elegant and horrible inevitability that I couldn't even hope to avert. The terrible beauty of their last encounter. I can't remember the last time an A/Z story has pleased me so much with its entirety - particularly for the SilMil. The concept is fresh and exciting. I've never seen a Zoisite quite like this tragic druid king, and I quite fell in love with him

[apsaraqueen]

wow, i am just blown away by the generosity of your review! thank you! i am very shy of treading into a/z territory, but i'm trying very hard to put a new spin on silmil. still don't have the energy for a real epic, so little ficlets like this will have to suffice!

found this more satisfying than most smut

i'm not judging ;D

The details like his always busy fingers and his appreciation for her nakedness just killed me. I had the sense that she was so used to him touching her and doing things like braiding her hair that his actions never pinged as odd. In fact, the entire scenario seemed unremarkable for them except for the conversation.yes! i hoped the conversation would seem incongruous with their actions. sort of idle curiosity on the part of a senshi who's never shed blood, compared to endymion's youngest general who practically kills for a job. i always see zoi as the most diabolical of the shitennou, deeeeep down, and so he's an excellent interrogator/executioner in my nutty silmil. i can also see ami being surprisingly