MOAR FIC DUMP
everyone, remember that ipod meme? I’m a cheater and any other notes are included in the content itself. it’s not very good, don’t expect too much from it.
No Pain No Gain; DBSK
kyuhyun, ryeowook.
Kyuhyun winced at the phantom ache of pain shooting through his limbs. He couldn’t take his pain medication on an empty stomach after all. He wasn’t stupid - he wouldn’t accidentally overdose on his meds and end up back in the hospital.
(“You’re eating again, right?” Ryeowook asked lightly, body language emulating much darker thoughts and emotions. “The manager totally wasn’t serious about that weight remark. You’re disappearing, if anything. You don’t need to lose ‘seven to twelve pounds’. You’ll be a skeleton by then. Besides, what about your medication?”)
Well, that would have to wait until he met his fans’, and management’s, expectations. He
Talkin’ To Me; Amerie
eeteuk, kangin, kangteuk, eeteuk&kanginarewhoresforeachother!AU.
Jungsu let the taller man press him against the wall and steal his breath - and kisses - away.
“Do I - ” He had to pause as the other nipped at his throat, “Even know you?”
There was a deep chuckle. “By the way you’ve been staring at me from across the room all night, I assume you would like to?”
Jungsu snorted. “That was a horribly cheesy line, but I’ll pretend it wasn’t for your sake. Besides, you were staring right back at me, I can’t help you took the bait. Come to this club often?”
He laughed. “No, I don’t. I’m Youngwoon, by the way.”
Jungsu hummed and ran his hands over Youngwoon’s front, smirking at the sound of gasping surprise as his fingers traced over a burning groin. “Nice to meet you. I’m Jungsu.”
Is It A Crime; Sade
sungmin, kangin, eunhyuk, sungmin/pepero.
Sungmin paused and analyzed the sight before him; Eunhyuk and Kangin clutching a box of Pepero, of his Pepero, his hidden stash of Pepero, between them looking guiltily at him. Hm. How…convenient. Now he wouldn’t have to go and hunt down the culprit later.
“I,” He told them, mouth drawing into a frown, “Will have to be kicking your asses now. Good for you.”
Eunhyuk squeaked as Kangin i
2 The Sky; Robin Thicke
heechul, kibum, siwon, kichul, sibum, psychobitchheechul!AU.
Heechul sighed as he loaded the gun and took it off of safety;
He had kissed Kibum happily that day, curling up with the other on the couch, sun and satisfaction warming him down to his toes.
“I’m warning you, Kibum, you ever betray me, I’ll kill you and whatever little hussy you’ve taken down with you.”
Kibum had laughed, eyes glittering, not taking him seriously.
Lacing up his red Converses, Heechul checked the slip of paper he had written to himself - address, nearby neighborhood in walking distance, name, Choi Siwon, disarming code for the house alarm, 1003, house key, hardly necessary for someone who always slept with his bedroom window open on warm nights - and left a kiss on Kibum’s hastily cooling lips, le
Song of pocchong~Shizuku no U; KOKIA
donghae, yunho, yunhae, villagepeoples!AU.
Donghae seemed mightily confused. “…You…do know I’m the village’s new priest, right? I’ve been in town for, like, four days. Remember? I ate at your restaurant the other night.”
Yunho nodded and thrust his gift, a small ring, into Donghae’s hands. “I know, and you’re also the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen in my whole entire life. Will you marry me?”
Donghae had half a mind to refuse - he was supposed to dedicate his life to gaining spiritual wisdom and staying chaste and all that jazz - but then figured that Yunho made the best pork buns ever at his restaurant and that was reason enough to say yes.
“Well okay then.”
Been Around the World; R. Kelly feat. Ja Rule
henry, hankyung.
Henry grimaced at the plastic bag - its contents were of questionable origin and more than likely something he didn’t really want to receive in an innocent looking white package from the postal service - and thought about never opening his mail again.
“It’ll get better.” Hangeng told him with a weak smile, snapping on some rubber gloves from the sink and picking up the clear bag to
My Life, My Love, My All; Kirk Franklin
siwon, hankyung, failed shihan.
Siwon pushed him away. “No.” He whined, “Hyung, it’s wrong.”
Hankyung stared at him, eyes steely and quickly becoming unreadable. “…Siwon…I just confessed to you, practically am giving my heart to you - ”
Siwon looked away from the Chinese boy. “But homosexuality isn’t natural and - ”
Hankyung stood at that and glared,
Forgot About Dre; …er? from Hidden Beach Recordings, I think
yehsung, ryeowook, sungmin, henry, yehwook, orchestra!AU.
“Want to go out for dinner, see a movie, then head back to your place to do…things?” Yehsung accented his statement with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle. “Fun things?”
Ryeowook looked up from his task of tuning his viola. “Jongwoon, the orchestra has a performance tomorrow. We should be getting some sleep instead of any of that.”
Yehsung pouted. Ryeowook shook his head. Yehsung whined in the back of his throat. Ryeowook crossed his arms and looked away. Yehsung growled warningly. Ryeowook took no heed.
So Yehsung began to act. “Hey Sungmin,” he called across the practice room, “Why don’t you get your sax put away and invite your little friend from the strings section to come with us to dinner?”
Sungmin positively beamed at the idea, not seeing how Ryeowook paled and started waving his hands frantically, “Okay!” And strolled away to do just that.
Ryeowook groaned and hid his face in his hands. “…Jongwoon…”
Yehsung gave him a friendly pat on the back. “Well whatshisname - ”
“It’s Henry.” Ryeowook corrected. “His name is Henry and he is very nice.”
Yehsung shrugged. “Yeah, him, he sits next to you in the pit, right cradle robber? So this is good for…inter-orchestra friendship and trust building. I’ll even invite Siwon along so I’ll have a fellow percussionist to bond with and to even it all out. Except for the whole ‘there’ll be five people hanging out instead of four or, even better yet, two’ thing, but, you know, whatever -”
“You,” Ryeowook grumbled, “Are so full of it.”
What I Need; Ray J
sungmin, shindong, attempted shinmin.
“I love you.” Sungmin had said, voice dreamy yet steadfast, perfect, just the way he had practiced in front of the bathroom mirror thirty plus times. His charm could not be denied or rejected or ignored and -
“That’s nice.” Shindong replied absentmindedly, distracted and rummaging through his duffel bag, “Where the heck is my mp3?”
Sungmin blinked. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. Shindong was supposed to look up, startled, then blush madly and stutter out a reciprocation of feelings before letting Sungmin kiss him and showing that, yes, despite the fans thoughts of him, he was indeed a grown man and did indeed have balls. (and sure, maybe in the process of making sure that that was established in his daydream, he had neglected to give Shindong his proper balls and perhaps also his proper personality, but that was not the point.) “…Did you hear me? I said I love you.”
Shindong nodded, “Okay. Love you too. You know that, Min. And have you seen my mp3, by any chance?”
Sungmin rolled his eyes. So plan ‘Confessing Eternal Love To Donghee and Receiving a Positive Actual Response Redux Number Four’ was very much not successful.
When the hell was Shindong going to realize he was actually very much serious?
HERE’S WHERE I START CHEATING HORRIBLY AND ADMITTING TO IT. I SKIPPED WRITING A DRABBLE FOR A SONG EVEN THOUGH I LISTENED TO IT:
This Love; G-Dragon solo
((BECAUSE I JUST COULDN’T. OH BIG BANG.))
AND I KEPT GOING WITH THIS ONE EVEN THOUGH TERRA IS LIKE 1 MINUTE AND 30 SECONDS LONG:
Terra; Ichiko Hasimoto/RahXephon Soundtrack ll
all suju minus eeteuk/mentions of eeteuk in name only?, futuristicspaceshipcrew/outlawstarknockoffMAYBE!AU.
BUT UM, YOU’LL HAVE TO WAIT PROBABLY 300 YEARS TO SEE WHAT ALL THIS HAS SPAWNED, IT’S LONG AND GOING TO BE FOR WOWOWPARADISE AND OH GOD, I SHOULD BE SHOT.
“If you press that button -- ” Kyuhyun warned, but then stopped as Heechul attacked him from behind and strangled him to death.
Oh wait, Heechul was just hugging him. Kibum made a mental note to make the proper amends on his status report due back to Eeteuk…well, right now, actually.
Donghae, who was crawling under everyone’s seat and all over the bridge’s floor (because he had dropped his fake identification card sometime between yesternight and lunch time two hours ago and had no clue where it was and if he didn’t have it bodily on him when they attempted to pass through the checkpoint for docking, Eeteuk would throw a hissy fit with plenty of ‘you are technically illegal when you are aboard our ship and I really would rather not losing the most entertaining and unique bioengine we’ve ever gotten our hands on. you know. illegally.’ flying about.) jumped up and slammed his hand down on the button. “Boom! Now I’ve just blown up the Earth, you see. Many Alien colonies are rejoicing, right Sungmin?”
“Sure, Hae.” Sungmin droned flatly, more preoccupied with flipping through a manual on the new defense system that Shindong had failed to tell anyone he had upgraded onto the ship last week until an hour ago.
Kibum rolled his eyes. “No, Hae, you missed. The Earth destroying button is there.” He pointed helpfully. Donghae’s mouth formed an ‘o’ before he grinned and slammed his hand down on that button.
Eunhyuk dragged him away from the control board, shooting a disapproving look at Kibum. “Don’t encourage him,” he hissed, “Hae, come on, you really need to start hooking up into the system, we’re about to navigate through a major asteroid belt, for god’s sake, the ship needs to be online and in full power.”
“Don’t wanna!” Donghae chirped happily even as Eunhyuk guided him to the engine room below deck.
“We don’t actually have an Earth destroying button, by the way.” Sungmin said, carefully eyeing Hangeng over an in-depth diagram of the left wing’s new gatling gun, who was looking extremely shocked and frantic. “And I wouldn’t rejoice if Earth was destroyed, promise.”
(Heechul’s traitorous declaration of, “I sure as hell would.” went unacknowledged because no one really wanted to touch on that. Ever. Not with Heechul.)
“Why,” Yehsung suddenly whined, draping himself over Ryeowook and reaching for a bandaid out of the younger’s pocket, “Did Eeteuk make Kyuhyun the commander for this mission? He’s the youngest.”
(Except for Sungmin. “I’m so glad you are not the political leader of your planet, the council was right for choosing your sister over you; it was best for the monarchy, after all.” Sungmin chimed, intentionally going for a hit that hurt because he was obviously still sore over how Heechul had been allowed to choose the model of guns for the side panels when he was the one who knew more about those kinds of things than anyone. “Though, I wouldn’t have even considered you eligible for throne in the first place, that in and of itself is amazing. You should be flattered the council thinks so highly of you.”)
Shindong shrugged, “It’s because he doesn’t act like he’s on drugs over half the time. Usually. On good days. And can pilot the ship much better than anyone else. …And you shut up, you’re just the maid around here, remember?”
“Unwillingly so, yes.” Yehsung sighed out, resting his cheek against the lapels of Ryeowook’s jacket. Ryeowook ran a hand through Yehsung’s somewhat puffy hair apologetically.
(Heechul gritted his teeth and glared at Sungmin. “If we ever run into any officials of your kind, I’m ratting you out for going AWOL in the midst of a planetary civil war and then you can gleam over my role in politics from the torture room they’ll probably hold you in for the rest of your life. So fuck you.”)
“If you think you are above that sort of behavior, Shindong hyung, then I have to tell you that you’re really not much better than any of them, usually.” Ryeowook pointed out. Shindong, in response, just grabbed him and gave him an intense noogie.
(Sungmin smiled far too sweetly and Heechul smirked far too sharply and they both began to slowly approach each other and Hangeng, the only one paying them any mind, grabbed Heechul from behind and set him down in chair before looking warily at Sungmin and shaking his head. “I’m pulling age rank now.” He said, pointing to Sungmin’s previously occupied seat, “Please sit down and do not break anyone’s neck, please.”)
“I propose a mutiny!” Kangin declared from his seat on the upper bridge.
“That’s pretty much pointless,” Siwon informed him, patting him comfortingly on the arm, “Eeteuk made you second-in-command while he was away, remember?”
Kangin was silent for a moment. “…Oh yeah.”
Kibum accidentally hit the send button on his status report without changing the little bit about Heechul attacking Kyuhyun from behind.
…Oh well, it was close enough.
AND HERE’S #11 THAT ISN’T REALLY WORTH READING? IT’S PRETTY BAD, ACTUALLY:
Break of Dawn; Michael Jackson
hyukjae, junsu, maybebroken!hyuksu?
“I think.” Hyukjae said, “I think I will go now.”
Junsu stared at him, knowing that that meant more than just - just -
“No. Hyukjae. Don’t.” He reached out, fingers groping for the warmth of reassurance. After all, if he held on unyieldingly to light escaping he could capture it in his hands (and ignore the rays escaping from the cracks in between his fingers).
“You have to be on a flight to Japan tomorrow.” Hyukjae said simply. “So have fun, okay? I’ll. Just. Go.”
***
I slaved through a couple of hyukhae fics trying to write kendra’s stuff, so here, watch my struggling through high school AUs and angst fic alike.
island;
Hyukjae meets Donghae for the first time ever in middle school, with Junsu by his side and through Sungmin hyung through Donghee hyung; it’s a really overly complicated process, truth be told. The simplified story, however, is this: two weeks into the school year, Sungmin smiles at him and says, “You know that guy that I’m hanging out with lately?”
Hyukjae pauses in his efforts to copy Sungmin’s geometry homework and racks his brain until a little light bulb goes off, “Oh, the fat one?”
Sungmin glares. “I’d appreciate if you didn’t call him fat, he’s really not. He dances, even. Anyway, yeah, he’s got this crazy friend that I think you should totally meet.” And then he gets to meet this crazy friend and history is made.
Hyukjae thinks of Donghae as an island, as weird as that sounds, because he’s like a strange unit of a human being all on his own surrounded in contrast by normalcy, like islands are strange units of land surrounded by water.
“No man is an island, entire of itself,” Donghae corrects him easily after hearing this theory, squinting horribly at the passage for English class their group is supposed to be translating and analyzing, “Joh…Jooon-oh Doh-neh?”
Hyukjae leans over and contemplates the foreign name. “No way, you suck at English. It’s, like, Jun…Dun, or something.”
“It’s John Donne,” Kibum says, rolling his eyes, “And you both suck at English.”
almost;
Hyukjae would never admit this, but he likes how Donghae looks. A lot.
He also likes it when Donghae eats, all sloppy and not caring if the food makes it to his mouth or falls off the spoon before then. And likes it when Donghae drags him to the pool in the summer on the hottest days when even splashing in water doesn’t break the heat and flounces around in his crazy colored tattered swim trunks that he’s had for too many years. Also likes it when Donghae splits an orange with him while they sit on the porch and, without a second thought, licks the remaining sticky citrus juice from Hyukjae’s fingers when they’re through.
When Youngwoon narrows his eyes at them and asks suspiciously if they’re gay and dating, Hyukjae almost says yes in an automatic response. Almost. He catches himself just in time and stares helplessly at Donghae - who laughs and tells Youngwoon to shut up before he has to ask the same question about him and Jungsu hyung -and wonders, well, what are they?
Hyukjae feels that, if he were dating someone, he’d be connected at the hip with them and do everything with them and they’d be like Donghae to him.
(He’s never dated anyone before, so he doesn’t really know, but still…)
crime;
It’s kind of a crime, Hyukjae’s sure, of the way he thinks of Donghae when he watches porn and jacks off. Or when he just jacks off in general.
He’ll think of Donghae, all naked and spread eagled on his bed, touching himself and moaning, head thrown back so his neck is showing, long and pale and - okay, so Hyukjae has this illicit fetish thing for Donghae’s neck - and it’s all sorts and shades of wrong, Donghae’s his best friend (don’t get him wrong, Junsu is his super best best friend, there’s a difference, they’re completely separate categories but that’s fine) and you don’t have really hot wet dreams about your best friend and then secretly wish for them to come true.
sunshine;
Hyukjae gets his hair dyed because he’s bored and because Jongwoon tells him that he’d look good with it. Donghae doesn’t seem to know how to handle the bright bright sunshine yellow of his hair.
“First Sungmin with the pink and now this…” He keeps muttering to himself.
Hyukjae feels a little insulted; the blonde is growing on him. “Does it look horrible or something? I know Sungmin’s pink is kind of crazy, am I really on the same level of comparison with him?”
Donghae bites his lip and looks conflicted. “No it’s more…like, the opposite of that. My morals are being thrown out of wack and I don’t know if I like it.”
Hyukjae barely has time to puzzle over what that means exactly before Donghae bounces in his seat and leans over the desk, asking, “Hey, have you started on the science research paper yet? I don’t even have a topic yet…” and Hyukjae forgets all about it.
hat;
Donghae’s birthday is coming up soon, in, like, two months and it’s the last one before graduation because they’re seniors now and this time next year they’re supposed to be going to college and, and, well, shit. Hyukjae kind of doesn’t know what he’s going to do because he’s applied to colleges but doesn’t know if any of them are going to accept him (they have to, at least a few have to, his mother keeps assuring him while Junsu makes faces behind her back and mouths, ‘No they don’t~’ and Hyukjae vows to tell his mother on him because Junsu sucks.) and, more importantly, what is he going to do without all these people he’s known for all, or at least most, of his life?
He can’t say he’s not freaking out about the thoughts, and, like, who’s going to fill in the empty spaces, big and small, that people like Heechul (big) and Ryeowook (small) and Donghae (bigger than big, crazy huge and massive) will leave behind?
*** (different attempt!)
Hyukjae leaves a packaged muffin - banana nut, Donghae said he loved those, but he’s been saying a lot of things he doesn’t mean lately - on the dresser, side by side with fork and water bottle, and creeps out the hospital room with Donghae asleep in bed. Hyukjae hopes he gets up today.
“How is he?” Heechul asks, eyes locked on the tile floor and counting the cracks. He’s yet to have gone to visit Donghae and Donghae is upset by that - I thought we were good friends, good enough for him to come and, his eyes say when he insists that it’s okay, that it’s Heechul and he knows how Heechul is. Hyukjae sits down in the adjacent chair, heavy and weary and tired, and doesn’t know how to be, how to act or speak or approach or feel, towards his hyung. There’s so much that hasn’t been done (and won’t, never will be).
“Hyung.” Hyukjae says, voice hoarse, and he holds his fists in his lap and clenches them till the knuckles are straining white. “Hyung, you need to go visit him. Soon.”
Heechul let’s out a short bark of laughter - it sounds of defeat and amusement and denial, an odd mixture. “He’s,” he protests, “He’s fine, I’m busy, I’ll get around to it soon, don’t rush me - ”
“You’re not so busy that you can’t be here talking to me.” Hyukjae says coolly, “Don’t bullshit me. It’ll take two minutes and Donghae will feel so much better.”
Heechul looks at him, eyes narrowed in hurt and fury (and this is probably the closest he’ll ever get to showing Hyukjae tears) and bites off his next words; “No he won’t.”
(It takes Hyukjae a while to realize that Heechul means that Donghae will still get worse and that Heechul is battling with the personal demons that tell him that he can’t make Donghae any better no matter how much he loves him and how does it feel to be worthless when it really matters?)
-
Donghae is awake today, really awake today, and that’s perfect because Jungsu and Youngwoon hyung have dropped by and Hyukjae would have hated for them to worry.
“How’s the business going?” He asks them cheerfully when they walk in, “Wanna go for a walk?”
There’s lots of hesitance and stalling and wanting to question the nurses about it, but Hyukjae lets a smile break out on his face for once - it’s a rare thing nowadays - and insists they just go because Donghae is getting annoyed and he’s been more impulsive and antsy then ever. He has every right to be, though.
***
this is really old. :o
“Siwon - !”
Said boy escorted Heechul forcefully and silently out the door, holding both of Heechul’s wrists together in front of him in one hand and keeping a firm grip on Heechul’s hip with the other - Dad was right, Siwon thought desperately, martial arts were useful in everyday life.
“I’m sorry ma’am!” Siwon called behind them, walking faster and bumping Heechul continuously forward, who was now trapped between Siwon’s arms and pressed back onto his chest. Who knew a casual night outing could turn out so wrong so fast?
Heechul struggled in the hold, blowing misplaced bangs out his face agitatedly. “Siwon, what the hell - ”
“Hyung, please,” Siwon pleaded pitifully, “Just be quiet and walk away.”
Heechul made an affronted noise that could have been his voice getting caught in his throat in rage. Or, as Siwon liked to hope it was, it could have also been some gas.
“No!” Heechul screamed at the top of his lungs. “I will not be treated like this!”
Well then, Siwon concluded wearily, it had definitely not been gas.
-
“I think you owe me an apology.”
Siwon looked up from his script to see an obviously unhappy Heechul. Siwon inwardly sighed - he didn’t have time for this, really; he had a whole script to memorize for a shooting the next morning. Early next morning, at that. He’d already spent most of his evening with Heechul and having the little incident at the restaurant, so he really needed the rest of his time to prep for tomorrow’s activities. Really.
“I don’t think I do.” He said, very easily and very simply, out loud and why had he thought that would work on Heechul and solve the problem? (For that would have been far too easy.)
Heechul blinked, slowly crossed his arms, and then flipped his hair with a furious toss of his head. Uh-oh, Siwon thought as he began to brace himself for what Heechul was planning on pulling out next.
“And why not?” Heechul asked in a pleasantly light and breezy voice, (the calm before the storm Siwon couldn’t help but think) “You carted me out like…like…like I’m not me. And have you checked the Internet? There’re pictures all over the place already and rumors going around and - ” He was starting to speed up and slide up the pitch scale, voice reaching new octaves by the second. Something had to be done or Siwon was done for.
“Heechul.” Siwon interrupted, putting his script down and giving the older a look that, he hoped, was disapproving and effective, (Heechul looked for the most part unfazed, so perhaps it wasn’t all that effective, but it was Heechul) “You called our waitress a fat cow for no apparent reason when she brought us our drinks. I think you owe her an apology.”
Heechul’s hand shot out and roughly grabbed a throw pillow off the couch as he glared at the younger boy. Siwon swallowed thickly and hoped Heechul wouldn’t leap at his throat.
“I do not.” He hissed out, ripping the pillow in half. “She kept looking at you funny, so it’s her fault for not realizing that - oh, never mind. You don’t get it either, you idiot.”
Siwon, sensing Heechul’s building frustration (for no apparent reason, really), uncrossed his legs (in case he’d have to run soon) and shot the now ripped pillow a fearful glance. Eeteuk was going to be a little less than pleased about that. “Hyung,” He said seriously, “You have some serious anger management issues. And what? What don’t I get?”
Heechul threw the pillow down and viciously kicked it across the floor. “Never the fuck mind! If you want to know, figure the damn thing out yourself!”
Siwon blinked, terribly confused as Heechul spun on his heels and stomped off. “…What?”
-
“Heechul likes you, that’s what that’s all about.” Donghae informed him later with a bored sort of voice, hanging over the edge of his bed upside down while flipping through a magazine, “Really Siwon, you are all sorts of blind about these kinds of things, you know?”
Siwon frowned, not quite getting it. “What? What? What do you mean he ‘likes me’?”
Donghae hummed understandingly. “I know. He’s so violent and crazy about certain things, like about how he’s sure there’s no God and I know you’re sure there is, but I’m sure you’ll both work that out somehow. Hopefully without you ending up dead in the process, you have my best wishes about that and all, but.” He shrugged, “You know.”
Siwon squeaked.
-
It was three days later, Heechul refusing to talk to or even look at Siwon, that Siwon got a late night call from Kibum.
“You,” Kibum said, sounding truly annoyed, even over the phone, “Will get your act together and do something about Heechul tomorrow morning. He is pissing me off. He is pissing Hankyung off. And if Jay were here, he’d be pissing him off too.” And with that, Kibum hung up the phone.
Siwon, very much confused and very much almost still wholly asleep, squinted through his drooping eyelids at the phone. “…What?”
-
“Um. Hyung.”
Heechul ignored him and kept picking at the threads of his sweater. His fingernails were snagging and pulling up little yarn loops and destroying the aesthetics of it, which would probably make him angry (angrier, actually) later, despite it being his own fault.
Siwon took a deep breath, fidgeting uncomfortably and glancing around the room in search for any members willing to help him. Most of them had fled, and Kangin, the only one remaining, was just looking amused while waiting for the fireworks. Drat.
“Hyung.” Siwon tried again, not at all sure where he was going with his trailing statement, “I know you…think…you…urhm?”
Points for coherency - not.
Oddly enough, Heechul responded to this; he looked warily up at Siwon, lips pressed together in a firm little line. “Well? Are you finally going to apologize to me, then?”
Siwon bristled slightly. “No! I didn’t even do anything - you shouldn’t have called our waitress a fat cow!”
“She was staring at you!” Heechul shouted back.
“We’re famous, of course she was staring!” Siwon desperately realized that this situation was going in a fast descent towards fatal crash and explosion. “Hyung, I don’t understand you!”
Heechul glowered at Siwon, “I don’t care! And now my favorite red sweater is ruined because of you!”
Kangin, from the other side of the room, snickered loudly.
Siwon was, once again, utterly utterly confused.
---
((And then one day someone helped them out and wrote a note to Siwon and stuck it to his forehead while he was sleeping. It read:
Heechul wants to have hot hot sex with you, so you need to stop being a prude and stick out once and a while.
And p.s. you guys have been dating for the past ever, duh.
Siwon didn’t understand why afterwards Heechul let Sungmin get away with borrowing his personal items when Kim Heechul Specifically Did Not Share His Things With Anyone, Ever -- in capital letters of course, to emphasize the importance of this law. Heechul just patted him on the head, gave him a wet kiss with lots of tongue, and told him to shut up and look cute when he asked about it.))
***
originally I was going to scrap this because it’s horrid, but then I changed my mind because this blatant generic angst breaks my heart on the simple basis that it deals with junsu and junho and I rarely see that around here. so it’s horrible and weird; oh well.
when they receive the news, unexpected and a crackling line of shock and sparks of electricity over a cell phone, they all freeze and pale and gape at the phone.
later, junsu runs away.
yoochun is the one who goes to find him (changmin has shut himself in his room, yunho is trying to be dutiful and a good leader and get him to unlock the door and jaejoong is cooking a huge omelet for five for dinner, slicing red tomatoes and green peppers without a sound, pulling out chilled pre-diced onions and white eggs from the fridge.)
junsu doesn’t get at all far with no shoes or socks on. yoochun drags him back and prays that they won’t see any grainy pictures and speculating lengthy articles in the morning.
junsu must not want to go to the funeral changmin says quietly when yunho retrieves him from yet another runaway attempt (attempt number four in the past week.) no fucking duh, changmin jaejoong hisses. yoochun kisses the bottoms of junsu’s feet softly (ew yoochun, junsu would have said under normal circumstances) and his toes are battered and cold beneath yoochun’s lips. what are you trying to get away from and to? yoochun asks.
but it doesn’t matter; junsu hasn’t talked since they found out.
((‘okay, you are so stupid.’ junsu giggled out at junho’s joke.
‘yeah yeah,’ junho said, ‘hey, i gotta go, i’m taking the dog out for a walk and lately he likes to run by the han. so we have to head all the way down there…you owe me little brother, this is your dog, right?’
‘didn’t you say it was like monsoon weather outside in korea right now?’ junsu asked, ‘you moron why’d you wait until the weather was so bad to take him out? shouldn’t have put it off so late, i guess, serves you right.’
‘shut up. i’m going now, alright? behave youself and take care, you brat.’
and junsu had said ‘okay’ and never imagined that junho would slip into the swollen han and drown - ‘hyung knew how to swim,’ he’d claim frantically - and - ))
***
kendra proposed this fic universe overlapping thing that she thought was brilliant and I heartily agreed upon - not that I ever told her, I think. and I thought about incorporating it in my 100fic challenge. I still may. but here’s all I got before I confused myself with the timeline I tried to draw out.
Kibum isn’t making any sense. “So,” he says, waving his arms all around, the huge gestures being lost on Siwon’s part, “So, it’s different.”
Siwon just stares at him. “Um, and why aren’t you at your evening schedule then?”
Kibum splutters - which in and of itself is strange because Kibum doesn’t ever splutter, he just, just stares and draws his lips into a thin hard line when he’s too overwhelmed with emotion to talk straight - and looks at Siwon like he doesn’t know him. “I don’t have an evening schedule tonight. That’s, that’s precisely it.”
Siwon slowly starts to reach for his phone, already mentally reciting the numbers to Heechul’s or Eeteuk’s phone. “What is ‘it’, exactly? Are you getting enough sleep?”
Kibum stomps his foot childishly (at this, Siwon immediately whips out his phone and starts to frantically dial as subtly as he knows how) and runs frustrated hands through his hair. “I,” he shifts nervously and gives Siwon’s phone a cautious glance, “I think you’re the one who should, who’s - what are you doing?”
“Nothing,” Siwon smiles, turns and whispers into the phone, “Hyung, yeah so Kibum has gone crazy and I - Kibum, wait!”
He storms off, dark look in his eyes, and Siwon feels inclined to follow him but Heechul is speaking really fast in his ear about how if Kibum wants to go off and sulk on his own then he can go and do just that, fuck him (hyung, that’s not nice-!), so Kibum slams the door behind him as loud as he can and Siwon can hear him stomping down the stairs.
-
“- and that’s why Kibum is nowhere to be found.” Siwon finishes up for the fifth time that evening. Hankyung snuggles into his side sleepily and mumbles something that is supposed to be reassuring but the meaning is mostly lost in the half awake slurring.
Eeteuk all but wails and Kangin gives him a comforting pat on the back, too distracted by the television to really offer anything else. “What are we going to do, he’s missing, he won’t answer his cell phone, I’m going to have to explain to management why he hasn’t gone to anything on his schedule - !”
“Hey,” Kibum says, yawning and walking through the door and down the hallway, like he hasn’t been missing for the past several hours, “Good night.”
“Good night.” Donghae calls back happily from his place on the floor next to Kyuhyun where the two of them are huddled around his PSP, “Yeah, so he doesn’t seem that weird to me.” Kyuhyun nods and, with his foot, jostles Ryeowook a bit with so he wakes up and moves off of Donghae and curls into him instead.
Eeteuk flails, accidentally smacking Kangin in the head. “OH MY GOD KIBUM COME HERE.”
There’s much foot dragging and nonplussed glaring on Kibum’s part as he turns around and comes back. “What?” he asks and even Siwon can see the bags under his eyes from across the room. “What in the world do you want?”
Eeteuk gapes for a few seconds (and Kangin has his arms crossed and is pouting because he is a big baby and is upset about being whacked in the head) before everything comes out in a jumbled up mess, “You - you, your phone, it’s been off and, and, where have you been, Siwon said, you, you’ve been acting strange since this afternoon, what - WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT?”
Kibum yawns, completely and totally unaffected. “I’ve been at a shoot. My phone was off. Can I go pass out in bed now?” He pauses and raises an eyebrow at the lot of them. “And anyway, why are all of you in our apartment anyway?”
Eeteuk tries very hard not to look guilty as all of them point to him in a silent explanation. “I, that is, it was a group meeting here because you were missing and you live here so we figured you’d turn up here first, but, only, Heechul went out drinking even though he lives here too and it wouldn’t have been that hard for him to stick around for a bit and then Sungmin went with him and Shindong went with him,” he starts to whine, “and then Yehsung is asleep somewhere and we couldn’t wake him up and Eunhyuk is holed up in his room making a long expensive call to Junsu and what, does my position as leader not mean anything to you all anymore?”
“Not really.” Kibum says, turning around to go to bed. Kyuhyun laughs and pays no mind to Eeteuk’s disapproving look.
“I thought you said he was acting strange?” Hankyung asks mostly into Siwon’s thigh, which he is currently using as a makeshift pillow. “He seems fine.”
“Yeah…” Siwon replies, frowning and confused.
***
so. I thought I’d try my hand at blohyuk. but instead of doing my original idea of blohyuk trying to sex it up at the suju dorm - and thus getting interrupted 10000+ times/embarrassed out of their minds - I decided to use a random epik high song as a prompt. it didn’t work out well. more vague!fic - why do I keep trying?
Hyukjae is all kinds of stupid, yes this is true, must be true, has to be true, good god, he’s stupid. He sighs and rests his head to the steering wheel and thinks, is this healthy for him?
The moon is out; the clouds from today’s storm earlier have completely dissipated. Hyukjae peeks in the rearview mirror, because he has just enough vanity left in all his weariness to check his hair, his skin, his expression. Same old, same old, but what was he expecting? He groans to himself and thinks of a wife and children that won’t be. Thinks of what he could and won’t have, should and doesn’t want.
Hyukjae still gets out the car and walks down that street, goes up Tablo’s driveway and knocks on his door.
“Hyuk.” Tablo grins, arms reaching out and taking what Hyukjae has to give (that doesn’t mean it’s okay), and mouth just right against his lips, the curve of his neck, a nipple, the soft skin of his stomach, and lower lower lower…
“I love you.” Tablo murmurs, all the pieces fitting perfectly and Hyukjae moans, thrusts down on him, thighs rubbing against Tablo’s sides, and this isn’t okay.
***
MARIE WANTED TO CELEBRATE OUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY IN JULY. yet here we are. anyway, it took me up until now to finish it and fix it the way I wanted it. I - after deciding to name the fic after that one alex song ‘feel like making sunshine’ and trying to figure out a plot from there - got my idea from the british movie ‘sunshine’ hence the backstory of the sun going out.
They live together, Youngwoon and Jungsu. They’ve know each other for four hundred something odd months, have been best friends for at least two and a half decades, and have been having sex and silently referring to themselves as an ‘us’ and ‘we’ for the past seventeen years.
“We’re getting old.” Jungsu says, brushing packed snow off the balcony railing.
Youngwoon groans and buries further under the covers, trying to hide from the cold; it’s a losing battle, as Jungsu has the back door flung wide open. “What do you mean we?” He grumbles, peeking tentatively over the edges of layers of blankets, “You’re older than me, hyung.”
Jungsu laughs and leans against the doorframe just enough so he can fling a hastily made snowball at Youngwoon curled up in their shared bed. He misses the only visible skin (Youngwoon’s face), but at least succeeds in hitting Youngwoon’s shoulder.
“That’s not fair,” he whines, flinging the blankets off and all but leaping off the bed to attack Jungsu, “See how bundled up you are? You can’t just let all that cold air in the room while I’m sleeping!”
Jungsu is still laughing by the time Youngwoon makes it across the room and grapples him, “Maybe you should sleep with a shirt on, then.” And he presses his face in the curve of Youngwoon’s neck, breathing warm air and brushing tiny lips over the skin as if to prove his point.
Youngwoon looks over Jungsu’s head - he’s always been a little taller than him and then in high school the difference became a whole lot more apparent when Jungsu stopped growing altogether and Youngwoon kept at it, limbs getting all gangly and awkward before he grew into them and built up some muscle - and his eyes sweep over the whiteness of the cityscape hidden under snow and ice. The sky is dark and gray with clouds and sun barely has enough power to peek through and Youngwoon has the fleeting thought of maybe today is the day? before he is distracted by Jungsu’s kisses up his throat.
(he’d be fine if today was the day, he keeps telling himself that, because he has everything he wants.)
Youngwoon is kissing Jungsu, his mouth small and wet, and Youngwoon’s fingers find their way to the back of his neck right where his hairline fades into smooth skin.
Then the doorbell rings and Jungsu pulls back with glittering eyes and a quiet smile and he slips out of Youngwoon’s grasp. “Close the balcony door if you’re so cold.” He teases, twirling out of their bedroom and to the front door.
Youngwoon rolls his eyes and does just that before the excited cry of “Hyung, you won’t believe this!” echoes from down the hall. Youngwoon knows the sound of Donghae’s voice when he’s excited and figures that Jungsu will need help.
When he gets there, Jungsu is pursing his lips in a worrisome way and Donghae is looking wide eyed and awed, clinging onto a mostly still asleep Kibum.
“What’s up?” He asks, absentmindedly wrapping his arm around Jungsu’s waist.
Kibum blinks, mostly unresponsive, before catching up a little bit and clearing his throat and running a hand through his hair. “From what I understand,” he says while half-heartedly sending a glare at Donghae, who ignores it, “Sungmin disclosed something previously classified that his research team has been working on to Hyukjae, who offhandedly told Donghae, who went to look it up and found a recently published English article early this morning. So he woke me up and made me read it to him.”
Youngwoon shrugs. He’d been expecting something bigger, something more revolutionary, “That’s it? What do I care?”
Jungsu leans on him. “Well, for starters, it’s about the sun.”
Youngwoon blinks, (and the first thoughts in his head are, Sungmin’s a small time physicist, what does he know about the sun, what do English articles have to do with the sun, and what?) “The sun?”
Kibum nods. “Yeah. NASA’s been collaborating with other space programs again and they’re going to continue the Icarus program.”
“The Icarus program,” Jungsu explains, glancing at Youngwoon out the corner of his eye, “You know, the ones that are supposed to re-ignite the sun.”
“Oh.”
Donghae props his chin on Kibum’s shoulder, “Yeah. Sungmin said his team was one of the many that were supposed to be constructing some super compact nuclear device that will fit on a spaceship and be able restart the sun. Hyukjae said that he said it was still gonna be huge.”
Youngwoon takes a moment to just think that over. Re-igniting the sun. What does that mean to him? It means life, of course, and living it, and warmth that no one in their life time really remembers or knows, and bright skies chasing away the steadily thickening dimness turning to darkness.
“This is kind of a big deal.” Jungsu says, summarizing both of their thoughts and emotions up in a wonderfully simple way.
-
They both are bundled up in coats and scarves and hats and three pairs of socks each as they sit in the park and watch little children play in the snow. This evening Jungsu’s eyes are greedy, envy plain across his features. (they both have kind of wanted children, but it’s always been a fleeting fancy and it’s not like they’re going to go out of their way to adopt. They aren’t stupid, they know that you can’t get a child on a silly whim and only take care of it when you feel like it. They remain childless because, really, they’re selfish and don’t want to take the time to raise something that’s so incessantly needy, they both suck enough from each other as is, sometimes to heartless extremes because they can’t help themselves.)
Jungsu breaks the silence. “What if they succeed this time? Wouldn’t that be something? The sun. We might actually have a bright sun.”
Youngwoon watches a little boy dump a pile of snow on a girl’s head. She shrieks and pushes him into a snow drift. There’s a pang in his heart as he thinks of how they’ve never known green grass and the occasional rare sunny days like his generation had been blessed to have the last of, thinks of how they might have to struggle in imminent darkness and die at a too young age. “I don’t know. I’m not going to get all excited, they might fail again.”
Jungsu pulls his hat over the tips of his ears and Youngwoon wants to kiss the rosy skin barely visible between the hat ears and Jungsu’s scarf. “Should we get kids?” he asks and sounds like he might really mean it, “Just, the fact alone that they are digging this nearly impossible mission back up after seven years means that we don’t have much time left no matter what the government is trying to say to placate us. And if they fail, shouldn’t we - ”
Youngwoon takes the other’s face into his hands and presses his own scarf clad nose to Jungsu’s. “No. Let’s not do stupid things out of desperation.” He doesn’t feel the need to explain. Jungsu will understand, he always understands.
(However, tonight, Jungsu just stares at him, looking lost and like he’s unable to read Youngwoon like a book for once.)
-
Jungsu has work and Youngwoon doesn’t feel like driving him.
“Take the train. Or bus.” He mutters into his pillow as Jungsu slips out of bed and turns off the alarm. Jungsu swats him on the butt and goes about digging through their closet for clothes. He’s waiting for the eventual resignation, but it never comes because Youngwoon had to stay after work late last night and really is too tired and he doesn’t care and maybe they are getting old and maybe they’re drifting apart a little.
“Fine,” Jungsu finally says, anger laced in his words as he slams the closet door closed, “I’ll just call Heechul and have him pick me up, then. Since you don’t care or anything, you jerk.”
Youngwoon knows that if there’s any chance of apologizing, it’s now. But; “Fine then. Good.”
There’s blessed silence as Jungsu noisily storms away to go shower and get in touch with Heechul and Youngwoon thinks that, finally, he’ll have one morning where he can get up when he feels like it.
Of course, this is just what Jungsu would like Youngwoon to think, for him to fall into a false sense of security. And just as he is settling back into the familiar lull of sleep, Jungsu is laying heavily on top of him in only a towel, skin still warm and damp from the shower spray.
“You’re a jerk.” He hisses, biting fiercely at the edges of his mouth. “You really are.”
Youngwoon doesn’t deny it, because he knows that he can be mean (but Jungsu can be meaner sometimes) and isn’t surprised when Jungsu rips the many layers of covers and sheets and blankets off and then it all just kind of dissolves into deliberate hurting and taking on both their parts. They do this. They just do and it’s, it’s just very them.
I hate you, Youngwoon almost imagines Jungsu is saying with each thrust, but hopes he never hears those words from Jungsu, not Jungsu, and spreads his legs a little wider and groans because it’s been a really long time since Jungsu’s been in any sort of mood to fuck rather than be fucked.
Youngwoon tells Jungsu as much, and hisses when Jungsu gives him a stroke and plunges deeper while quietly reprimanding him for his vulgarity in a cold steely voice.
“Oh ew.” Heechul says when he gets there and Jungsu’s hair is dripping wet from the second shower and Youngwoon is lounging on the living room couch in just a robe. “Oh ew, right before I got here, really guys?”
Youngwoon eyes Heechul’s undeniably feminine mink coat and pink bag and glares. “Shut up, you’re such a woman.”
-
The day Icarus II dispatches for its journey, Jungsu is right by his side, clutching his hand tightly and watching the live broadcast in tense silence.
(there had been plans to have a get together of sorts with the whole group to watch the event, but no one had really felt up for it after Jongwoon had mentioned in a careless offhand sort of voice, “It’s live broadcast, what if it just explodes during take off? Like that one shuttle during the late 1900s did.”
“Completely dashed hopes and superstitions,” Kyuhyun had answered seriously, “And the papers would probably read ‘mass suicide sweeps across the world’ in the morning.”)
Luckily, despite Jongwoon’s pessimism, everything works out fine and the shuttle leaves orbit with no problem and Jungsu sighs and leans on Youngwoon in relief.
“I love you,” he murmurs suddenly, eyelashes tickling along Youngwoon’s collarbone as he places awkward kisses trying to reach skin hidden under a bulky sweatshirt.
Youngwoon’s hand lands on the small of his back - or at least where Youngwoon would approximate the small of Jungsu’s back to be - and he smiles, thinking, this is my best friend, this is my buddy, “Me too.”
-
“There are problems,” Sungmin tells all of them over cooling pancakes, “NASA is blaming a whole bunch of people, talking about how there’s been some technology failures, the crew isn’t keeping in contact with the home base as much as they’d like, if at all nowadays, and the percentage of failure is kind of increasing every day.”
“Thank you Sungmin,” Donghee mumbles into his cup of orange juice, “Because that’s a lovely way to start off our Sunday brunch.” Hyukjae grumbles incoherently in agreement, pouring a sugar packet into his coffee.
Sungmin shrugs and begins to repeatedly poke Ryeowook in the side as a silent way to ask for the syrup. “Hold your horses.” Ryeowook replies, reaching across the table and over Kyuhyun’s eggs to get the bottle.
Siwon fiddles with his tie, almost out of place at the table in his freshly pressed church slacks and dress coat, and stares blankly at his plate. “I guess we’ll.” He starts and doesn’t finish, because he just doesn’t know where to go from there.
Han Geng prods him lightly with the spatula, apron on and hair clips keeping his hair in place out of his eyes and Heechul keeps cracking jokes about how he looks like a domestic housewife. “Hurry up and eat,” he says, visibly annoyed by the damper in the mood, “The food I slaved over to cook will get cold if you wait too long.”
“It was cold as soon as you took it off the heat.” Heechul chimes in unnecessarily.
“Some of us, Rella, are trying to pretend that we aren’t all wearing coats over sweatshirts over long johns around the breakfast table and can see our breath indoors.” Youngwoon bites off, agitated.
At this, Jungsu mutters something under his breath so quietly that Youngwoon is pretty sure he’s the only one who catches any of it - and it sounds an awful lot like ‘I’m not ready to die yet’.
-
“It’s, it’s, it’s like it’s night all the time, oh god, perpetual darkness, the moon, I can just barely see the moon too, and - ” Jungsu is freaking out, out on the balcony again and staring up at the sky as if willing the sun to come back as it used to be, and Youngwoon would just really like for Jungsu to stop screeching and shut up and let him get some sleep.
“Youngwoon, it’s two in the afternoon.” Jungsu says, voice panic stricken, “You can’t really be trying to sleep.”
“Well yeah, it’s not like I can tell what time it is anymore.” Maybe he’s absurdly laid back about the world basically ending, but there’s not a whole lot he can do about it so why go through a nervous breakdown over it? That’s how he sees it, anyway.
The good part of his excessive apathy is that he has enough to spare and, in fact, Jungsu seems to calm down a little, floats his way over to the bed and curls up beside Youngwoon, sighing.
“This is so unfair,” he whispers into the pillow.
“Yeah, it is.” Youngwoon concurs, and it just isn’t his style to say straight out I love you, I’ll keep it up till we’re dead and gone, so he settles for the best he can do, “But at least you have me.”
-
They aren’t awake when it happens, so it’s not as if either of them will have dramatic stories to tell for posterity, stories of ‘and then there was a great flash of light, like the will of god, and the sun was brighter than it had even been, than I had ever seen it before’. (that’s what Siwon says it was like, and Jungsu believes him while Youngwoon just humors him.)
How it works out is they wake up to the phone ringing and the clock reads eleven in the morning and there’s light - light - filtering through the window.
“HYUNG HYUNG HYUNG.” Donghae yells through the phone and Jungsu is already outside in his pajamas, feet buried in snow, blinking up into the sunlight.
“We know.” Youngwoon tells Donghae, “We noticed.”
-
“We’re getting old.” Jungsu murmurs, for the most part distracted by the way Youngwoon’s thumb is probing and working its way through a ring of muscles.
Youngwoon doesn’t bother to disagree, “Yeah, we are. Thanks for sticking with me through all these years, partner.” It’s meant to be teasing, but he forgets about that and sighs at the kiss, all teeth and tongue, that Jungsu leaves burning on his neck.
Jungsu rides him, slow and steady, panting against Youngwoon’s skin and fingers scaling up and down his chest. Youngwoon grabs at Jungsu’s waist and rolls his hips, looking over Jungsu’s shoulder to watch the sun lazily rise from behind the horizon and into the sky.