(Untitled)

[arabalchemist]

As most of the people who will actually read this journal know, the last three month or so have been... hectic and confusing for me, mostly thanks to the women involved in my life. I fell for a girl that I met through the Pride and Allies Club at my local community college, and became so enmeshed in her life that when she, a lesbian, admitted

Comments

[florastar]

I wouldn't be as sure as you are with your list, especially concerning me. Everyone has their bad luck things...

I almost considered not dating again after when Ryan broke up with me... he crashed his car (still doesn't have one), got attacked by a horse (twice), dated someone who left him (leaving him crushed)... I felt like I bring bad luck. Keep your head up, hun. It'll be okay.

[florastar]

My honest advice to you, and this is meant in all good faith, I'm not trying to diminish your feelings or be pretentious here, is to give up on the past and move on with your life. At this point in time, it's only giving you pain to consider these past failed relationships. These people are across the country now, and I'm sorry to inform you, probably never going to look twice at you, in terms of dating, because of that. I've known a person in my life who became obsessed with their past, and as far as I know, it brought them only misery. When I moved on from it to try and make a decent life for myself without being weighed down by it, it brought me one of the happiest times I've had in my life thus far. In my opinion, it's foolish to be so focused on the past to the point of obsession or self-violence. That hurts nothing and no one but you, and it's not worth it

[wrenbow]

Well I was wondering when you'd get to me. =p

Just for security's sake, could you take most of my last name out of your post? I'm not sure I like the idea of anyone being able to look me up straight from an LJ post, no matter who's posting.

I can only echo the person above me and say that, since you're halfway across the country, moving on is the best thing to do. There are always going to be people you feel attracted to, people over which you ask yourself "What if?", but that kind of thinking doesn't get anyone anywhere. The only way I can relax and enjoy myself with the people I've asked that question about, is to let go of the possibility, push it far away, and forget that I sometimes feel inadequate for being alone. Truth is I'm too much of a person sometimes for the guys I'd like to date. Likewise, you are complete in and of yourself, not because of anyone you've fallen in love with.

*hugs* Good luck man. :)

[arabalchemist]

Yeah. I think this was a case of learning and venting through putting where you're at down on paper. I refrained from saying this in the original piece, but I think it might have conveyed what I was trying to communicate in the piece: "you ladies were crazy for letting me get away." At the point that I'm at right now, I've had a lot of people in the GLBTQ community criticize me as a straight white man because I haven't had to deal with the same social pressures and/or struggle that they have. I sorta meant this, in association with the PTSD piece I wrote, as a big "Fuck you, here are MY past struggles bitches, and I'm stronger for them. You don't have a monopoly on having things to deal with in life."

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[anonymous]

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