Felling Bleh

[aramuswulf]

Don't know why, but I'm feeling kinda lost and all alone right now. I want it to pass, and I am damn happy I have my room set up at the castle, but I feel empty inside right now, without direction

Comments

[buhfly]

You're feeling that way because you're still upset. You have a right to feel that way, as horrible as it is. *cuddle*

What's the castle? I can't remember.

[aramuswulf]

The Castle is the gamer house/bachelor pad in Scottsdale that many people have lived in over the years. Its a nice place, and one I am glad to be calling home again.

[the_leaking_pen]

how the hell did you move in by the way? you did just win me a twenty dollar bet by doing so (damn if i can remember with who) that i never expected to win, we all figured craig would stonewall you moiving back in.

[mistressdesade]

Just concentrateon being the best "you" that you can be. You have tons of friends tht love you too. There's the bostonian slutboy thing if you want a diversion, also we are going to have a cash game at our house on Saturday if you want to come

[ladynisa]

Now, not to sound completely mean, but, let me make sure I'm understanding this situation correctly. Because I know how things can get exaggerated sometimes when playing the gamer telephone game

[aramuswulf]

I feel the need to explain myself further to you, not because I'm doing anything wrong, but because you have siezed on something that recently happened in my life thru my own actions and ripped me apart nicely for it. While my situation does have something to do with those choices, thats not really what I was talking about.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you can't make me eat crow for the decision I made. I welcome the criticism and know at least some of it is deserved. I have been known to be unflinching when it comes to the humble pie. When you get a chance give me a call and I will explain the rest to you.

[xmm_nisa]

Phones are out right now, because of lack of a paycheck due to an old address. :( But email me! For if things are not as they seem, then I would liek to have a better understanding. You are my friend, and I of course care about you. :) Though would also expect the same from others to tell when to just buckle down and suck it up when I've done something to myself. Email me! I check it fanatically. ladynisa@gmail.com

[aramuswulf]

Whats this xmm thing? Didn't know you had another jopurnal. I'd email you about it but its kinda something that can't really be explained by writing down. Its gonna come out the same way I think. Suffice to say my mood doesn't have everything to do with my recent decisions. I did make a decision about life and the bed that I made i am lying in comfortably. This mood is stemming from somewhere else I think.

Like I said I'll explain when I can. You still have my #?

[iansgeisha]

The counselor in me wants to say so much, but the best thing i can say to you is this.. Breath and let the feelings pass thru you. Don't try to fight them, and don't try to hold onto them. Just expierence them as they come up.

I am back from Kansas, if you would like to get together to chat.. We can meet somewhere in the middle for coffee or something..

[aramuswulf]

So gonna do that. My phone gets better reception now so I'll try to call sometime tonite, but tonite is poker so I'll see what time I get done.

[q_bomb79]

You are feeling lonely, understandable. You just ended your long time relationship. You have jumped into the bar scene again....in my experience, the bar scene is generally a lonely place. Sure people go there to have a good time, drink, meet people ect.....but they are not there to find lasting relationships. If they are then they really need to rethink the approach.

When I got older, I avoided the bar scenes like the plague. I occasionally went to dance clubs with friends, but for the most part I avoided the bars like the plague because the people I met there were not the quality type of people I wanted to associate myself with. The "friendships" and "relationships" that came out of there were empty and non-existant because it was just people looking for a good time with no strings attached.

Only specific types of people can be sastified with this type of existance. You appear to not be one of them.

[the_leaking_pen]

just people looking for a good time with no strings attached.

:coughcoughmostofthedeviantscoughcough:

and shes right. you were NEVER satisfied with that kind of life, even when you lied and told yourself you were.