[Step and Go] ひとりの夜なら凍えてしまうだろう
Title: ひとりの夜なら凍えてしまうだろう (If a night comes that I’m alone, I wonder if I’ll freeze.)
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Nino/Touma, Juntoshi (side pairing: Sakuraiba)
Genre: Romance, Angst
Disclaimer: I guess Johnny’s technically owns Arashi, huh? Still not me.
Summary: Nino is feeling heartbroken after Ohno, his best friend, and Jun, the man he loves, begin to date, and simply wants some company in his misery.
A/N the first: This is actually part of an epilogue to my story Step and Go (which can be found here). I wrote the epilogue as a series of stand alones, so hopefully, even if you haven’t read the story beforehand, you can still enjoy this part if it interests you. There will be three related stories in the same universe included in this epilogue.
+++
Nino’s relationship with Touma was based on something rather depressing: unrequited love.
Nino recognized the look in Touma's eyes immediately when they had met the night the group had gotten smashed together. He was past feeling familiar with the emotion himself, after all. Touma hid it fairly well, though, and after he had finished a few beers the tinge of anxiety had almost disappeared from his eyes. But by then, Nino already knew.
Ikuta Touma was undeniably head over heels in love with Ohno.
He was hiding it as admiration, and it was possible that the star himself didn’t even realize what had happened to him, but Nino could tell. It was just one of those things he’d always been good at, reading other people. Ohno was the only one he’d ever met that had given him a run for his money, but even after all the drama that had occurred with Jun, Nino had figured things out eventually.
It was true that Nino found Touma fairly attractive, especially his cute smile and high energy, but it had taken every ounce of self control to suppress his disappointment over the loss of Jun. Ohno… Ohno was the only reason that he’d given up on the other idol, if it had been anyone else Nino would have fought them to the death.
At first he hadn’t even tried. After Jun had been complaining about Sho and Aiba’s relationship, Nino figured that there was no convincing him otherwise (as headstrong as Jun was), and that he should focus on returning the synergy to their group. That had been the original plan of his “prank” on Jun, just get him to loosen up and realize how much of an ass he was being (Sho, now he could handle that sort of criticism from someone and just tell them to back off, it was Aiba that Nino was worried about- he always had to please everyone all the time, especially a close friend, and worried himself sick when he couldn’t). After that the group would go back to normal, right?
Nino hadn’t anticipated several situations that arose from his innocent joke. Although he had always figured that Ohno had had some sort of crush on Jun, he assumed Leader would never say anything about it aloud and the two of them would continue to have a common ground based on those emotions. Through some strange circumstance, though, Ohno had confessed to Jun. Nino had sensed the new problem immediately and had assumed the reasons behind it, but even then he couldn’t believe it.
What he couldn’t believe even more was the fact that Jun liked Ohno back. After he had been spouting all of those homosexual criticisms about not having kids and a family. Yeah, Nino always knew that Jun had pretty much worshiped the ground Ohno walked on since their Hawaii debut, but he always figured that was just admiration, a leftover piece of Jun’s adolescence, not actually love.
When Nino found out, he knew he had no choice but to accept the couple. He was happy for them, really he was. If only there was some way to cut out his heart and extract the lingering attachments and wishes for Jun to only look at him, and throw them away. If only he could leave that part of himself behind and just be happy for Ohno like he so desperately wanted to be.
Afterwards, Nino easily put on a front that showed Leader (the only one who would be able to detect his real feelings and probably the only one that would care anyway) that he was fine, he was moving on, Jun hadn’t really meant that much to him. It had worked, either that or Ohno had been too distracted with Jun to really notice. Either way, it didn’t matter.
And that was another thing! It was bad enough he had to share Satoshi with fishing, now he had to share him with Matsujun as well. Even though the ex-comedy duo was still basically attached at the hip around the studio, Nino couldn’t help but think that his friend’s thoughts and attention were somewhere else half the time. It was particularly irritating.
But he was happy for them, he really was.
+++
The first night they had sex started out with an email.
Nino had taken Touma back to his place after their drunken date (he wasn’t going to lie, he was actually looking for a quick fuck to get his mind off of Jun and Ohno, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to take advantage of Touma in such a way, he already felt pathetic enough as it was). Touma had thanked him the following morning as Nino gave him some medicine for his hang over, and the two of them had played video games together for almost three hours before Touma realized the time and rushed away.
The gamer had wanted to bring up the topic of Touma’s crush on Ohno at that point, but the drama star had looked so innocent and naïve. Nino couldn’t help but think he didn’t want to be the one to bring the actor to terms with reality; he still looked so hopeful and full of energy.
Before he had gone, Nino had discreetly given him his number, making some vague promise about the two of them getting together to play video games later.
He had to admit, even though he hadn’t gotten laid, Nino felt just a little better about his situation with Juntoshi, knowing he wasn’t quite alone in his isolation. Even though Touma’s emotions were miles away from his own, he couldn’t help but feel some camaraderie with the other actor knowing they were in the same boat.
Well.
A few days later Nino had received a distraught email via cell phone.
I didn’t know who else to talk to.
Did you know Jun and Ohno are dating?
-Touma
At first his heart had jumped, knowing that Touma had joined him in his melancholy (as masochistic as that was) and then he immediately saw his opportunity for being a “comfort” to Touma.
Yeah. Do you want someone to talk to?
He almost felt guilty sending the suggestive email. Almost.
Touma had come over to his apartment again and the two of them sat on Nino’s couch while the movie star complained about how he hadn’t seen this coming and didn’t he have a reason to be surprised?
Nino nodded and mumbled a few replies when necessary, patting the younger star lightly on the back occasionally, and finally asked “You’re in love with Ohno, aren’t you?”
No, no, of course not that’s not what this is he had insisted in return, but after Nino confessed to Touma that he was in love with Jun, a tense silence fell over them. Touma looked down at his hands, his face etched with grief, and Nino left his hand lightly on Touma’s back, not drawing his eyes from the star’s face.
And then they had fucked.
Touma had been the one to initiate it (well, that might be debatable since Nino had started giving him his best ‘fuck me now’ eyes halfway through the conversation). He had leaned forward slowly and Nino hadn’t pulled away when their lips met. Touma tentatively pressed their mouths together before pulling away, only to do it again more aggressively a moment later. Nino, who had planned out each moment a step in advance, slowly began leaning back, pulling Touma on top of him on the couch. As time passed the younger star became more desperate and Nino allowed him to do whatever he wanted the harder the better.
After Nino had cried out softly as he reached his orgasm, their clothes partially discarded on the floor in front of the couch, and Touma had come back down to himself, the younger star apologized softly. Nino smiled, although the action was tinged with bitterness and melancholy, and assured him it was perfectly fine. They were both just getting their frustrations out.
+++
The next time was several weeks later. Touma sent another cell phone email, asking to come over without offering an explanation, and Nino immediately agreed. Actually, he was glad for a distraction, since he had been playing Final Fantasy on his Playstation for over 5 hours already that day.
After Nino had let him in and offered him a beer, Touma began to lightly complain about his long day at work and how he wished he had more time for himself. Nino could already see through his front, though. He had come for sex, which made the gamer even more excited at the unexpected arrival.
Just because he wasn’t getting love didn’t mean he couldn’t get laid, right? He tried not to think about how depressing that sounded and instead concentrated on the beer taste of Touma’s tongue in his mouth.
The two of them had made it to Nino’s bed this time, with almost no transition between their light talk and the suddenness of their bodies pressing against each other. The first time had been treading on new territory and trying to figure out is this really okay, I don’t even love this person, are they thinking of someone else? Now they both knew why they were there and that sex didn’t necessarily entail romantic feelings or even a relationship. It was just sex.
Harder, fuck me harder Nino said this time, between pants and grabbing tightly onto his partner’s neck, and Touma did.
By the time they were done, Nino thought his voice had gone hoarse from screaming and moaning so loudly. Touma was a Sex God. He didn’t think he could even move after having such a hard orgasm.
The gamer lay exhausted on the bed and watched Touma slowly begin reclaiming his discarded clothing.
“You can stay the night, you know.” It was already midnight by then.
Touma turned to him with a vaguely surprised look on his face.
“That’s okay. I have work tomorrow, anyway.” He turned his back to Nino and began struggling to get his briefs on.
Nino tried to get up the motivation to leave the bed as Touma made his way for the door, but in the end he couldn’t.
+++
A few days later, Nino could be found rapping his knuckles heavily on Jun’s apartment door.
It was strange. Being here, knowing that Ohno was waiting for him on the other side of the door, knowing that his two friends were going to be all lovely dovey, that he was voluntarily entering their most intimate environment did not intimidate Nino in the least. If nothing else, he felt like he needed to mix the aura up a little to keep the couple on their toes.
Although he had spared most of the details of his escapades with Touma, Nino had been keeping Ohno up to date under the pretense that they were ‘dating’. Although he hadn’t confirmed this with Touma yet, Nino somehow felt if the star was confronted with the question he would smile nervously and rub the back of his head, but go along with it. There was some unsaid bond between them now, some understanding of each other’s feelings that had brought them closer together. It almost felt like they were trying to help each other, although Nino could see their efforts had only made him hurt worse. Not only could he not have Jun, but apparently he couldn’t fully have Touma either.
Matsujun was the one to open the door, with a curious look on his face, and he raised his eyebrow upon meeting Nino’s eyes. Nino forced a smile, which he thought looked fairly genuine, and cleared his throat, pushing forward his most normal and cheery voice.
“Oh-chan’s here?”
Something clicked in Jun’s eyes and he backed away from the door, allowing Nino inside. As the gamer entered the house he noticed Jun turn and shoot a questioning (although amused) look to Ohno, who was lounging on the couch with his monthly fishing magazine.
Nino chucked and guessed “He didn’t tell you I was coming over?” as he slipped off his shoes. Jun turned back to his boyfriend with a light hearted affectionate look and mumbled a negative answer. Nino thought he might puke.
As sexy as Jun was, Nino wasn’t sure how Ohno put up with his mushy lovey kissy-ness. Well, actually he did, but Nino preferred the more subtle route himself.
The magician stepped across the room and past Jun with an air of authority. He plopped down next to Ohno on the couch, then immediately threw his feet up next to him and took his usual relaxing position with his head on Ohno’s lap.
Leader raised his magazine to accommodate Nino, then lowered it back down, never tearing his eyes away from it. Jun watched the scene as he walked into the open kitchen, where he pulled some tea out of the fridge, looking somewhere between envious and amused. That made Nino feel a little better.
He held back a mischievous smile that was threatening to break through his lips and waited for the right timing. Jun had poured himself a cup of brown tea and was bringing the glass to his lips.
“Me and Touma had sex.”
The tea shot out of Jun’s mouth and over the counter despite his efforts to cover his lips. He coughed a few times and Satoshi turned his head slightly to first look at Nino, then at Jun in the kitchen, a small smile now gracing his own lips.
Amusement was apparent in Nino’s eyes and he shared a muffled laugh with his best friend.
After only a few seconds of silence, Ohno replied comically, “Oh really? That’s great! You two are more serious than I thought!”
Nino knew that Leader would play along, if for no other reason than to see Jun squirm. “Well, not really, he’s just an animal, you know…” Nino started in a conversational tone, looking away from Satoshi to his fingers, trying to act nonchalant.
Before he could continue, Jun interrupted them from the kitchen. “Erm, I think I’ll go to the grocery store.” His voice was nervous and Nino could tell that, although it was all in good humor, Jun really didn’t want to be here for this conversation. Just as Nino had predicted.
Jun threw a paper towel, which he had used to clean up the tea with, into the garage before popping into his bedroom and then back out the front door as fast as his feet could carry him. When the door closed behind him, Nino and Ohno broke out into giggles simultaneously.
They didn’t need to exchange a that was great or did you see his face? It was all unsaid, as it had been for the last 8 or 9 years.
A comfortable silence overtook them before Kazu brought the subject that had been resting heavily on his mind.
“I just can’t help but feel that sex is sex. You know? What if he doesn’t actually like me?”
Although this concern was quite accurate in Nino’s mind, he knew that Ohno probably didn’t realize the fact that it was happening on both sides. Not only was Nino worried about Touma treating him as a substitute for Ohno, but he was worried about himself doing the same to Touma with Jun. Although that was how it had started out, Nino was realizing the error of his ways and thought that maybe, just maybe, he should try to make things work with Touma. If it was still possible.
Ohno put down his magazine, realizing that Kazu actually wanted to have a serious conversation with him, and then rubbed his chin lightly. Nino allowed him a few moments to think things through.
“Well, I think that he wouldn’t have sex with you if he didn’t really like you. At least a little.”
Blunt as always, Oh-chan.
“I don’t know… I don’t think he wants to be in a relationship with me.” Nino’s hands had unconsciously began plucking at the t-shirt he was wearing, removed nonexistent dust. “Actually, I don’t really want to be that serious either, but… I mean, how do you know if you’re being used?” Or using someone else?
Ohno looked thoughtful again, this time glancing up at the ceiling.
“Hmm. Well. I don’t think Touma-kun is that sort of person. I think he’s very genuine.” Nino sighed and wondered if he should just come out and tell Ohno more of the facts in order to get some more satisfactory answers. Not only was he hiding that fact that maybe he was the one using Touma, but also that Touma continued to be deeply and madly in love with Leader.
He sighed instead.
After another brief pause Ohno began to gently play with Nino’s hair and suggested “Maybe you should just ask him?”
Nino scoffed and looked away from Ohno. That would be the honest straightforward thing to do, yes. But Nino didn’t feel he was particularly either of those things.
“I guess so…”
Actually, the Arashi star had no intention of asking Touma about it. It would bring to the surface too many things that had been poisoning his soul in the last year, and Nino didn’t think he could deal with that yet. But, of course, he realized the longer he waited the darker his heart became. In fact, Ohno might be the only thing keeping him from locking himself in his apartment and playing Fire Emblem for 48 hours straight.
The conversation died, Ohno apparently having no other prophetic words to add to the subject, and so Nino forced a smile and asked another question that had been on his mind for a while.
“So how’s Jun in bed?”
Nino could tell Ohno was a little surprised at the question, but Kazu knew his friend wouldn’t with hold any details from him. Even if he did, the game had devised an extra-special-tickle-Ohno-until-he-reveals-everything method that was sure to succeed.
“He’s… surprisingly sweet.”
“Surprising? Are you kidding me, that guy has ‘sap bucket’ written all over him!” Nino felt jealousy rise within him, but it quelled immediately when he looked back to Ohno’s face. His neutral expression had sunk into something similar to one an affectionate puppy wore. It was for that reason that Nino was willing to go through the heartache of knowing every detail of the thing he couldn’t have. “Do you have sex a lot? How often?”
Ohno turned away, trying to cover up his shy expression (but Nino already saw it, too bad Oh-chan). “I don’t know, like every other day?”
Nino pursed his lips, trying to decide whether that was a good number or not. “I guess you’re both fairly busy, huh? Did you move in here yet?”
The older man’s gaze slowly returned to Nino’s. His eyes said something like ‘we are both busy but we’re making the most of it.’ Communicating with Satoshi was easy. Half of the understanding between them seemed to be nonverbal and for as long as Nino could remember it had been fairly accurate, too.
“I’ve left a few things here. He gave me a toothbrush, so…” Nino couldn’t hold back his smile. Yep, all Ohno needed to function on a day to day basis was his toothbrush and something related to fishing or art. In Ninomiya’s opinion, Ohno was a fairly easy person to please and accommodate, especially for being an idol.
“You’ve been staying, then? I guess you have to if you want to get any.” The gamer showed another gleaming smile, although it was somewhat forced. “He makes you orgasm, right?
Leader blinked a few times before he answered. “Of course.” There was an awkward silence for a second before Satoshi continued with the obvious embarrassing question. “There are some people that don’t?” Nino laughed at the dumbfounded look on Ohno’s face and decided he’d leave the ‘unhealthy relationship’ talk for another day when he wasn’t feeling quite so miserable.
The two of them fell into silence again, Nino eyeing Jun’s Super Nintendo out of the corner of his eye. He turned back to Ohno, surprised that he hadn’t picked up his magazine after the lapse in conversation.
“So, Touma’s an animal, huh?” There was an interested twinkle in his eye. Nino felt a surge of shyness, which he immediately pushed back, since he considered himself a confident sort of person, and besides he was the one that had brought up the topic, anyway.
“Uh, yeah.” Nino averted his eyes before he continued. “He made me cum so hard I almost passed out.”
Ohno replied with a sound that was part scoff and part laugh. “Seriously?”
Nino nodded with a small smile on his lips. Actually, he didn’t really want to talk about him and Touma anymore. He was getting anxious about the whole situation instead of becoming relieved like he had hoped. Nino knew that he was doing the wrong thing by encouraging Touma to keep coming back to him, but… he couldn’t help it. It was too comforting to know that someone with the same feelings was with him.
He felt Ohno’s hand slowly start to move through his hair again and Nino sighed happily. Satoshi certainly knew when to let things drop (either that or he was just too lazy to think of something else to say). Although he hadn’t gotten any answers or advice that was particularly helpful, it was probably worthwhile to talk about some of his problems with his best friend.
A smile still plastered on his face, Nino turned to the oversized media center in front of them and suggested they play a little Mario before Jun came back and kicked him out.
+++
This was the worst.
Absolutely the worst.
The night before, after they had had sex, Touma had mumbled something about the two of them meeting Jun and Ohno for lunch the next day.
Nino had had to ask “Excuse me?”
But, here they were. For some Godforsaken reason Jun had decided the four of them needed to start hanging out more. Nino couldn’t help but think it was one of two things: either Ohno and Jun had shared some pillow talk (Nino knew that Ohno wouldn’t betray him like that, but he wasn’t about to underestimate Jun and his ability to get what he wanted) or Jun was simply getting revenge for the tea incident.
This… was not good. Nino didn’t think he could stand to watch Touma around Ohno and he didn’t want to show himself to his partner in this position either. This would only get worse and fragment their relationship even more than it already was.
But Touma wasn’t the sort of person to turn down a friend, especially when he had absolutely no reason to. And Nino couldn’t tell him no after looking into those dark puppy dog eyes.
He still hadn’t stayed over the night before, though.
Jun and Ohno would arrive together, of course. Since Nino and Touma were masquerading as a couple (Nino was surprised that he hadn’t even had to talk with the younger actor about that) the two of them met up a few minutes before hand and planned to arrive together. It was almost like they needed each other’s support in order to make it through the afternoon.
As Nino and Touma approached the designated meeting spot, a park near their studio that was almost completely hidden between the skyscrapers that were so common in Tokyo, Nino abruptly stopped as soon as he saw his two band mates.
They were seated on a bench across from a sign that announced the name of the park, far earlier than they needed to be, of course. Although Nino could tell they were trying to be discreet, their hands were intertwined, half hidden behind them, and they were chatting idly, stupid grins on both of their faces.
Nino felt his heart drop. This was not going to turn out well. He couldn’t move forward any farther.
The gamer watched as Jun released Ohno’s hand and reached up to touch Leader’s hair almost unconsciously, both of them lost in their conversation and looking at each other. Satoshi’s expression didn’t seem to change, but Nino could tell by the subtle lift of his mouth and the crinkling of his eyes that he was in bliss right now.
Nino gulped and finally averted his eyes. God, he couldn’t do this. He was going to turn around and-
Before he could move Nino felt Touma grab his hand.
After swallowing his nervousness, the idol slowly looked back at the couple on the park bench. As he turned (he felt Touma give his hand a firm squeeze) Jun’s eyes suddenly met his, and the star smiled over at the two of them holding hands. Nino forced a shy smile and allowed Touma to pull him over to the waiting couple, thankful for the strength of the other star.
Sneaking a look at his date, Nino thought maybe I can make it through this after all.
+++
The two of them had made it through lunch without incident (actually it had almost been pleasant) and Nino thought that Touma deserved a reward.
Touma, unfortunately, had to return to work afterwards, but the two of them had been on the same wavelength: Touma had come back over again that evening, despite the fact that they had had sex only the night before.
But something felt different tonight. As soon as the other star was inside the door, Nino was there, pressing their lips together.
Touma gave him a pleased smile (Oh God, he was so adorable) and placed his hand lightly on Nino’s waist. The gamer offered him something to drink, distractedly pulling at the jacket his partner was wearing as they stood in the doorway. Touma rejected the offer and instead pulled the shorter man back to him for another kiss.
They were naked and tumbling into Nino’s bed a few moments later. The singer wrapped his bare legs around Touma’s hips as the actor pressed him against the bed, their mouths open in a sloppy kiss.
Nino allowed the other idol a few more seconds of dominance before he gently pushed Touma off of him. “Wait,” his voice was low and heavy with passion, “you lay down right here.” He directed Touma to the spot next to him, and Nino pushed himself up and over so he could straddle him. He touched the actor’s chest lightly, just as impressed with his toned muscles as he had been the first time they’d had sex. Touma’s hands had found their way to the outside of Nino’s thighs and they were rubbing up to his waist and then back down his legs impatiently.
“Nino,” he was still calling him Nino after all of this. “Nino, what’re you-“ The gamer touched Touma’s lips lightly with his forefinger, giving him a sultry look that said ‘shut the hell up’.
Nino leaned back and collected a bottle of lube from a pillow, where the idol has stored it earlier for ease of use. With a smirk he poured some lightly onto Touma’s chest (the younger man was watching every moment Nino was making, still trying to figure out exactly why he had been made to wait) and slowly began spreading it around by making circles with his fingers. Touma’s hands had come to rest on Nino’s hips, where they were gripping with moderate strength, as if the actor needed something to hold onto as an anchor. The younger man’s mouth was slightly parted, his tongue darting out every few seconds to wet his lips, his eyes still glued to Nino’s skinny body and was apparently trying to anticipate his next movement.
Still not offering an explanation, Nino lifted a hand, which was covered in the oil he had been spreading across Touma’s chest, and subtly moved it behind him. As Touma watched, Nino lifted his hips up and forward, inserting his own finger in his ass in order to prepare for the mind-blowing sex he would be having soon enough. Although the position was a little off and Nino knew he wasn’t doing as an effective of a job as Touma usually did, he could already see what effect his display was having on his partner. The hands at his hips were gripping harder, massaging his skin unconsciously.
Nino let out a soft mew, more in anticipation of what was to come rather than particularly pleasing himself, and Touma’s eyes grew a little brighter, a little wilder. He leaned up and forward, but Nino pressed him down with his other hand.
“Not yet.” He started gently massaging the oil into the younger idol’s chest again, the other hand still working as his back. He began thrusting his hips forward a little for effect.
After he felt he had done enough, Nino removed his hand and slid back towards the edge of the bed, resting on top of Touma’s shins, and forcing the younger idol to release his tender hips. He leaned down, attention fully on Touma’s erection, and grasped it firmly in his oily hands. He gave it a few pumps, watching his lover's reaction through his eyelashes, and then took it his mouth.
Upon the contact, Touma’s head leaned back, then immediately forward again; Nino could tell he was forcing his eyes open in order to watch him and the gamer wasn’t surprised. This was the first time he’d given oral to the other idol, despite the many times they’d had sex. Touma had done him before, but Nino wasn’t the sort of person to give something so valuable (and leverage-able) away on the first date.
He ran his tongue over the head in circles, using one of his hands to pump up and down like he had before. Touma was moaning now and several obscene phrases had left his mouth. His hand came to rest on the back of Nino’s head, tangling in the hair that Ohno so often played with, and pushed Nino down his cock further. The Arashi member only tolerated it because he was rewarding Touma for being so sweet and supportive that afternoon.
Nino took as much of the cock into his mouth as he could, and began making a growling noise in the back of his throat. Touma had done that to him and it had been amazing.
“Stop, Nino. St-stop.” Nino let the thing of his mouth with a pop and gave Touma his best innocent look. The younger idol’s cheeks were flushed and he was panting with his mouth half open, and although it looked like he was on the verge of an orgasm, Nino knew too well that Touma had more consideration for his partner than that. They would cum together.
The younger idol tried to push himself up again, but Nino once more pushed him back down. It was a reward, after all.
The gamer slid back up and positioned himself on top of Touma’s hips again, the anticipation of having the other man inside of him almost making his hands shake.
Lifting up the erection with one of his hands, the other one steadying himself on Touma’s stomach, Nino slowly moved it between his legs and placed it at his entrance. He tried to take it in slowly, but for God’s sake he wanted it right now. Using his weight as leverage, Nino engulfed Touma’s cock in seconds, eventually resting his ass cheeks against the younger man’s hips. As he pushed down (far faster than he should have, it stung a little bit), Touma let out a rather loud cry, which sounded like he had been caught off guard, and his hands were once again at Nino’s hips, gasping so hard it was starting to hurt.
“Oh God, oh God, fuck fuck fuck…” In the end, Touma’s hip had thrust up to meet Nino, the curses flying out of his mouth in moans. The gamer needed a second to adjust, as apparently did Touma, since Nino was sure he had felt the younger man cum a little bit inside him already.
He took a deep breath, trying to relax, before using his thigh muscles to lift himself up a few inches, and then press back down. One of Touma’s eyes was crinkled shut, but Nino could tell his partner was ready to go for a while, probably because he had let a little out a few seconds before.
Finally getting used to the feeling (it was the first time he’d ever rode Touma, up until now it had been pretty basic missionary style), Nino began bouncing himself up and down, trying to find that spot in there that Touma seemed to have no problem locating most of the time. He leaned back a little, using his knees to balance instead of his hand, confident that Touma’s grip on his hips and his position on the bed would be enough to hold him up.
Oh, that was it, right there. Nino let out a shaky moan as Touma’s cock found his prostate. The gamer let his own efforts wane as Touma began thrusting up into him, concentrating on just keeping himself up as his head fell back of its own accord and his eyes drifted shut.
It wasn’t like usual. Nino felt like he was being teased, not fucked into the headboard of the bed. Although the little pulses of heat were still crossing his face, they weren’t as intense as they had been and Nino needed more.
His head fell forward again and he unconsciously stared at Touma, whose face was etched in concentration as he looked at Nino’s hips.
“Touma…” Nino’s voice was low and soft and he wasn’t sure if his partner had heard him.
With the next thrust, Touma stopped completely inside of him, then met Nino’s gaze. Without asking, he used his hands to flip Nino over onto the bed, the gamer automatically wrapping his legs around Touma’s hips again, and anchored himself above Nino’s head with his hands pressing into the sheets.
Using all his weight, he began to thrust inside of him again.
Right away, Nino let out a loud moan. He was hitting exactly the right spot; this time a flash of heat crossed his face instead of just a pulse.
“Ah, ah, ah!” Nino let out a sound with every thrust Touma made. “Harder, please harder.”
Nino grabbed onto the metal headboard of his bed as Touma’s thrusts sped up and the entire frame began to shake.
Fuck, fuck. Every time. Every time it was the right spot the one that made Nino forget to breath, the one that stopped all brain functions.
Nino couldn’t keep his eyes open any more as his vision turned white. He hadn’t even touched his own cock, son of a-
He came hard, his back arching high off the bed, while he screamed out Touma’s name. He forced his eyes open, just a silver, to catch Touma’s pleasured face as he came too, which made the after waves of his orgasm that much more intense.
Touma fell on top of him a few seconds later, breathing heavily. The two of them lay on the bed together while Nino tried to get his brain working again, even just enough to figure out what time of night it was.
The first thought to mind was I hope Touma enjoyed his reward and the second one was that lube is stickier than I thought it was.
Blinking down at the younger man several times, trying to clear his vision, Nino rubbed his hand through his own hair. Tonight had felt like real relationship sex, not I’m-using-you-to-get-to-somebody-else sex. It had felt good. It had felt twice as good as the pity sex they’d been having up until now.
He couldn’t help but smile.
Touma looked up at him, a content grin spreading across his face too, and he raised an eyebrow in a teasing question.
Needless to say, that night, he stayed.
+++
Nino grinned to himself, stuffing his gamboy quickly into the shoulder bag he was using today. It had been about a week since the night that something had changed between him and Touma, and ever since then the gamer had been on cloud nine. They had been out on a date (well, they hadn’t said it was a date, but Nino thought there was no mistaking it) and Touma stayed over again the next time they had sex.
Today they had made arrangements to hang out at Nino’s apartment. Touma had agreed to help Nino beat Super Smash Brothers on two player story mode, and although Nino wasn’t sure whether it he was just being humored or Touma actually enjoyed video games that much, they were going to play either way.
Because of a mismatch of schedules, Touma was going to come to the Arashi Studio and pick him up, and Nino assumed they’d probably grab some food on the way home. He was actually really excited, the first 100% genuine time since before he’d decided to play that prank on Jun. They would play some video games, maybe have some sex, maybe snuggle a little bit. There were butterflies in Nino’s stomach and warmth in his chest.
He was trying to hurry (he was sure Touma had come in a few minutes ago) since he’d been the last one out of the studio and then had to collect his things. Ohno, who never carried anything with him, had left almost ten minutes ago, and Jun, who was the only other member who had to pull together his stuff too, had made it out the door a few minutes before. Nino suddenly realized he hadn’t even noticed the time he’d had alone with the other idol.
Finally slinging the bag over his shoulder, Nino rushed out of the dressing room and into the filming studio, where Touma had said he would be waiting. He had probably been early enough to catch the end of the show, which made Nino even giddier than he already was. It was bliss, knowing that someone was waiting for him to get off work so they could go home together.
Slowing down and taking a few deep breaths to calm his panting, the gamer slowly slid open the door to the mostly-empty studio. Immediately he noticed Touma, who was sitting in the front row of the audience stands, and then Ohno, who was seated to his right. They were chatting lightly, Touma explaining something with his hands and Ohno smiling and nodding in response. They seemed to be caught up in the conversation, as they hadn’t even noticed Nino enter the room.
The gamer turned, trying to find Matsujun. Where was he? He needed to pull his boyfriend away from-
Jun was standing a few feet away from where Nino had stopped, right inside the door way. The younger star was glaring at the two seated together across from him with his arms crossed. Although Nino would admit that he was feeling annoyed and maybe a little pissed, Jun looked absolutely irate.
But he wasn’t moving or saying anything. He looked about as immobile as Nino felt.
Nino turned back to the couple, his eyebrows creasing down and a frown spreading across his lips as Touma chuckled loudly at something Ohno said to him.
Damn it. What could he do besides wait here for Touma to look at him? The more time that passed, the more pissed off and discouraged the gamer started to feel.
Fine. Fine. Nino didn’t care. He’d go home and play games without the person he was allegedly dating, the one that was supposed to be looking at him, not flirting with his band mate and best friend right in front of his Goddamned face.
A list of obscenities came to Nino’s mind as he let the anger take over. He bit his lip, trying not to let it show too much. Not that anyone was looking at him.
As he was taking a deep breath, trying to quell his emotions and be rational about this situation, Nino noticed Aiba slowly start walking across the room. Had he been here this whole time? The gamer turned his head slightly and noticed Sho-chan sitting in one of the chairs to his right, where Aiba had just come from. He was looking at him with curiosity (and possibly pity?) in his eyes. The rapper offered him a nervous smile, and then turned away, back to where Aiba was standing.
Even as the klutz approached the couple, they didn’t turn to look at him until the last possible moment. Touma was chatting lightly, looking at Ohno with another carefree innocent smile, and he only paused when Aiba was standing directly in front of them with his hand on his hips.
Aiba looked down at him with an annoyed expression and raised an eyebrow.
“You know it’s rude to flirt with someone else while your boyfriend is watching.” He looked back and forth between Touma and Ohno, obviously addressing them both.
Simultaneously, the two of them turned their heads to look towards the door, where Nino and Jun were almost standing right next to each other. Ohno blinked at Jun few times, his expression returning to neutrality, but Touma’s face immediately shifted into an oh shit face.
Nino mentally thanked Aiba for doing what he, and apparently Jun, couldn’t, and then promptly turned and walked back out the studio door.
+++
It was about twenty minutes after Nino got home that a knock came to his apartment door.
Knowing it was probably Touma, Nino seethed on the couch for about a minute before he couldn’t stop himself from standing and approaching the entrance.
He opened the door with a frown on his face, ready to tell Touma to get the hell out. If he wanted to pursue Ohno again, that was fucking fine with him. They could go their separate ways and stop causing each other anxiety and heart ache.
The words died on his lips at the nervous and sad look on the younger star’s face. Without a word, Nino sighed and allowed the person he was still ‘dating’ into his apartment.
Afterwards, he didn’t look at him again (if he did, Nino knew he would cave in an instant). Although the whole episode didn’t seem like it was that big of a deal, Nino couldn’t help but think past the simple fact that Touma had been enjoying Ohno’s company.
All sorts of insecurities came to Nino’s mind after witnessing the casual chattering between the two friends. Did Touma actually like him, like he’d been starting to think? Maybe the younger actor was still using him to get close to Ohno, or even as a replacement for him. What if it had only been Nino that had sensed the change in their relationship and Touma still thought they were just fucking for fun?
Nino plopped down on the couch and stared out the floor length widow against the wall, watching Touma slowly approach him with his peripheral vision. The younger actor stopped a few feet behind him, rubbing the back of his head, and Nino refused to turn and look at him.
Touma audibly swallowed and whispered his name. Nino looked down at his small hands and tried to decide if he would drag this out any longer or just confront Touma about it.
When the gamer didn’t respond, the younger actor slowly walked past him and sat next to him on the couch, trying to decide if Nino was going to stop him, by the look on his face. Nino glanced up quickly, but immediately returned his gaze to his hands collected in his lap.
“S-sorry…” Touma finally offered, resting his hand lightly on the back of the couch and leaning closer to Nino. It was obvious he knew why Nino was upset; after all, their entire relationship up until a few days ago had been based on their unrequited love for the other Arashi members.
Nino had already given Jun to Ohno, he didn’t think he could let Touma go, too. He finally looked up and met the puppy dog eyes.
“It’s-“ he tried to start, but nothing came out. He’d thought to say something like It’s not a big deal, but it was a big deal and he wouldn’t let it drop without working it out. Even if that meant letting Touma go.
“Nino,” Touma started after the gamer had stopped. “Ohno-“ he swallowed nervously after letting out the name, “Ohno is a friend,” he started, gently touching the gamer’s knee.
Nino broke in, trying to hold back the depression that was welling up in his chest. “I know, I know, you guys are still-“ his voiced almost cracked as he started talking and he was ashamed to think that he sounded like he would start sobbing any second. Thankfully, Touma began talking again before he could continue and further embarrass himself.
“Ohno is a friend.” He moved his hand to touch Nino’s cheek. “You’re the one I’m dating.”
Nino swallowed and tried to digest the underlying meaning of those words.
Touma leaned forward and Nino couldn’t tear his eyes away from his lover’s. He was genuinely serious; he had meant every word that he’d said. The weight in Nino’s chest was slowly disappearing, being replaced with relief, and the gamer tried to force himself to understand. He couldn’t prevent Ohno and Touma from talking and being friends. It was inevitable, especially with Nino in the middle of them. He’d just have to make sure he was with them all the time, listening in on their conversations, and making sure Touma’s affections didn’t drift away from him.
After hovering for a second with their faces a few centimeters apart, Touma finished filling the distance and pressed his lips against Nino’s. It was a cliché kiss, but Nino didn’t mind. Predictable didn’t necessarily mean bad.
When Nino didn’t push him away, Touma wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled their bodies closer together. He deepened the kiss, forcing his tongue past Nino’s lips, and ran it over the pearly teeth. Nino felt his shirt being slowly lifted up from behind, and he gently pushed Touma away, breaking the contact between the couple.
“Wait. Just, wait.” Nino blinked a few times and took a deep breath. “Before we do anything else, I just need to,” he paused, trying to collect the words he wanted to use, “I need to tell you that I really like you, you know, not like oh, we’re dating but like, if this continues I’m never going to let you even look at another man, or woman. I mean, this is a commitment, you know, and I just want you to know what you’re getting yourself into, you’re eventually going to have to take responsibility, you know.” Nino knew he was rambling, his words eventually running together, but he couldn’t stop himself. What he had really wanted to say was I think I love you, but, of course, it hadn’t come out that easily.
Touma’s face broke out in a grin. “I take full responsibility,” he responded cheerfully, nodding his head for emphasis.
Nino’s brow furrowed at the response, initially unsure of what that was supposed to mean. Well, if the gamer had meant to say ‘I love you’ he could only assume that response was ‘I love you, too’.
Nino tried to hold back a smile that threatened to burst through his mouth (he was supposed to be pissed off and upset after all). With a neutral expression he replied “Alright” and gave Touma his own nod. The younger idol jumped forward and refastened their lips together, catching Nino slightly off guard, and wrapped his arms tightly around Nino’s midsection.
After getting a hold of the situation, the gamer allowed the smile through as Touma kissed him, and rested his hands lightly on his boyfriend’s back. He had been lying earlier; this was bliss.
Only a few seconds later, Nino pushed him off again and suggested they head into the bedroom. Touma responded with another smile and nod, pulling Nino off the couch by the hand. Before they had made it all the way to Nino’s bed, the younger idol had pulled the older one back into his arms, initiating the kiss yet again. He ran his tongue over Nino’s lips for only a second, before breaking away to take Nino’s shirt off.
They undressed each other, as was customary now, and then began kissing again, one of Nino’s hands resting on Touma’s cheek and the other on his shoulder. Touma tilted his head to one side, thrusting his tongue farther into the gamer’s mouth, and greedily running his hands anywhere they would reach.
Nino was feeling special tonight, but he wasn’t sure if wanting to make it last would beat out wanting to have sex right now. Touma’s hand was grabbing his ass and pushing their hips painfully close together, and Nino could already feel the desperation he experienced whenever he had sex with Touma come on full force.
Pulling away, Touma’s arms resting on his lower back, Nino looked up at him with his best (and often practiced) fuck me look.
“Touma, I want you inside of me right now.” The younger star’s eyes began to sparkle and his fingers pressed sharply into Nino’s back before he swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down quickly.
“Lay down on the bed,” he directed, turning away from Nino and retrieving the lube. Nino immediately complied, although he usually didn’t like to be bossed around (if it would get him some sex with Touma faster, he didn’t care), and plopped back onto the bed. He raised his knees up, presenting Touma with a clear view of his posterior, and watched the younger idol hastily spread some lube on his own erection.
Touma licked his lips before pressing one of his slick fingers into Nino, who was relaxed enough that it immediately slid all the way up to his knuckle. Yeah, that felt so much better than his own fingers. Nino raised his hips off the bed a little as his lover added another finger, and re-dispersed his weight onto his elbows. Touma’s long fingers were deeper in him than his own stubby digits would go, and over time the younger idol had figured out that bending them forward just slightly would hit Nino’s prostate occasionally, and doing so would make Nino start writhing and arching his back, like he was doing now.
Nino let out an impatient pant and threw an irritated look at his lover, who hadn’t torn his gaze away from Nino’s ass yet. The gamer’s hip buckled up as Touma ran his finger across his prostate one more time, before he basically yelled “For God’s sake, Touma, fuck me.”
The younger idol let out a low chuckle, finally glancing up at Nino's face, but withdrew his fingers and gave his own erection a few more pumps before directing it to the place his fingers had been playing with a moment before.
He pushed in slowly, agonizingly slowly, grabbing tightly onto Nino’s hips as he did so. Nino sucked in some air quickly between his teeth, the feeling of being stretched only adding to his heightened senses. It was true, make up sex was definitely amazing; it added a whole new aspect to the experience.
When he was in all the way, Touma paused, one of his eyes twitching in pleasure, and waited a few seconds to get a hold of himself. Nino took a few more deep breaths, then tried to think of some way to express his impatience to his lover.
Touma, who was breathing fairly heavily himself and still hadn’t moved his hips yet, suddenly reached forward and grabbed one of Nino’s hands. He shifted their weight a little so that he could bring the intertwined hands towards his mouth, eventually kissing the back of Nino’s knuckles lightly.
“What’re you doing?” Nino was not amused, he wanted to start some fucking-
Touma’s tongue darted out as he spread Nino’s hand open, licking the valley between the gamer’s fore and middle finger, and Nino lost his train of thought.
“What’re you doing?” he asked again, this time more desperate and almost scared. “Don’t put that-“
Too late, Touma had already taken his middle finger into his mouth and was erotically sucking on the digit. The only other thing that Nino was feeling besides that mouth was his ass throbbing around Touma’s cock.
He shamelessly moaned as Touma released the finger and licked his way to the next one, repeating the same process over on the next digit.
Oh God, why was he doing this? Nino’s fingers were stubby, unattractive, dirty. He hated it when people looked at them, and he wouldn’t let anyone but Leader explicitly touch or exam them.
But even worse, the most irritating thing that Nino had ever discovered, was that his fingers brought him pleasure. In God’s name, of all places why did it have to be his hands?
And the only other person alive who knew that was-
“This is what you were talking about?” Nino’s voice was shaky and he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the scene Touma was making devouring his fingers.
Touma didn’t respond, just continued his trail of licks and kisses as Nino twitched on the bed underneath him. His expression said Nino’s guess was right on the dot, though.
“Oh...G-God, stop…” Nino’s eyes squeezed shut and he pressed his head to the side, trying to quell the waves of passion that were coursing through him by that small movements. He was going to kill Leader, he would lock him up in the studio with no fishing and no Jun for the next year…
Touma began mumbling against his knuckles. It took Nino a second to make the words out through the daze in his head.
“I wonder why your fingers look so dirty, only to me?”
“Oh my God, are you reciting Gimmick Game lyr-“
Suddenly, the same time that Touma took Nino’s ring finger into his mouth, he withdrew his hips and thrust into Nino with perfect aim, firmly hitting his prostate.
The gamer let out a breathless gasp and his back arched completely off the mattress. His eyes almost rolled into the back of his head, and all Nino could see were white spots dancing around the ceiling.
Touma thrust into him again, twirling his tongue around the end of Nino’s fingers and it was all the idol could do to keep breathing.
The younger star sped up his movements, somehow managing to keep his hips on target and still run his tongue down the inside of Nino’s palm (the gamer’s arm was actually dead weight by this point). Nino was alternating between moaning, cursing, and screaming Touma’s name, unsure which he was doing at any particular moment. After five or six thrusts, Nino’s back still arched completely off the bed, he pushed his head into the blankets underneath him, his vocals suddenly stopping on his open lips.
His body had been taken over by pleasure. He wasn’t even sure what his name was at this point, just that he was going to burst and that he was going to die and that he was fine with that.
The white spots finally spread wide enough to blind him and Nino stopped breathing.
A few seconds later, pleasure still coursing through him full force, Nino’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and he lost consciousness.
+++
What appeared to be only a few minutes afterwards, Nino blinked his eyes open, unable to move his body otherwise. He was in the same position they’d been having sex in, only now his arms were spread out to either side and his legs were hanging off the bed. He vaguely heard Touma shuffling around the room outside of his field of vision, but Nino wasn’t conscious enough to even lift his head up.
“God, are you okay?” Touma leaned over him with a wet towel in hand. Nino tried to lift his legs; he could barely move them, but it was enough to tell that Touma had come inside him. That’s all he wanted to know, since there was a vague worry at the back of his mind that his passing out had cost Touma his orgasm.
Nino forced a lopsided smile at him. “Y-yeah…” His voice sounded hoarse, even to himself.
Touma’s palm swept the wet hair from his forehead and rested there for a second, checking his temperature.
“It’s your fault.”
Touma couldn’t hold back a triumphant smile, although he had apparently tried to do so. His hand gently moved from Nino’s forehead to his cheek, and he was giving the gamer the sweetest sappiest look that he ever had. Nino thought through his daze maybe I can live with sweet and sappy after all.
After a moment, Touma still leaning over him, Nino gave him a devious look.
“So please. Don’t touch me with those dirty fingers.” Touma looked taken aback for a second before realization crossed his face.
His expression turned thoughtful for a moment before he continued “Why do the colors of the town look so vibrant? Is that because I'm becoming dirty too?” He smiled down at Nino again, still looking sappy.
“Is it?” Nino finished off the verse, returning Touma’s warm expression. “Since when have you listened to my music?”
Touma chuckled. “I’ve always listened to Arashi’s music.”
“That’s not Arashi’s music. That’s my solo,” Nino pointed out. Touma finally plopped on the bed next to Nino, resting on his side and still naked from their bout of sex, and the gamer finally got up the energy to turn his head in order to continue looking at his lover.
“Uh, well… I mean… We are dating…”
Nino raised an eyebrow at Touma’s embarrassed expression. Although he found the look absolutely adorable, he wasn’t going to show it quite yet. He wanted to hear why Touma knew the lyrics to his solo.
The younger idol continued speaking nervously after the stern look and silent response from Nino. “Well, uh, I was just curious, so one day I did a video search of your name…” Touma turned away from him, facing the ceiling, and rubbed his hand through his hair nervously. Nino felt butterflies start to flutter in his stomach. “The first thing to come up was a fanvideo of that song at one of your concerts.” He paused again, but Nino still didn’t interject (even though he was tempted to lecture Touma about how much Johnny hated illegal recordings despite the publicity and the fan tracking they caused). “When I watched you dancing and heard the lyrics you were singing…” Touma trailed off again, this time swallowing as if the video had had some real impact on him. “God, you’re so sexy,” he finally admitted after a moment of silence, turning back to Nino.
The younger idol leaned across the bed and gently pressed their lips together again, Nino still unable to really move from his spot.
“You want to go again? Because you’re going to have to give me a minute.”
Touma grinned sheepishly and shook his head.
“No, but can we snuggle? I’m tired,” he admitted, resting his hand lightly on Nino’s side, on top of his ribcage.
Nino blinked at him a few times, and then replied. “Fine. But you’ll have to move me.”
+++
A/N: Hee hee, how did you like it?
I feel like I took a lot of risks in this chapter. The style was a little different (a little more choppy) than Step and Go, although I think it worked fairly well. I also tried for some angst, which I don't think I'll ever be able to write properly. I was only going to write one full sex scene, since it would've been three times longer otherwise, but you can thank yarukizero for the last part. I asked for some suggestions on the ending and she suggested moar sex. ^.^ Speaking of that part, there were three things there I wasn't sure about: Nino's fetish (omg, the first fetish sex scene I've written har har), inserting the lyrics to Gimmick Game (I don't care much for songfics, but those lyrics just fit the whole angst too well), and Nino passing out (I had to do some research on that, since I don't know anyone let alone a man who's passed out from sex). I really hope it was good instead of overdone. >.>;
By the way, I really like to write Nino, the more I see him the more he grows on me, which is weird since I haven't liked him much since I first got into the fandom. ^.^; He's like the only member of Arashi that is sarcastic, really. Even when Jun is upset I think he's pretty straightforward...although that may just be a Japanese thing...ANYWAY, I'm a pretty big video game nerd, too, I'm sure you picked that up in the subtle game references. >.>;
So, I hope you enjoyed this. There's two more sections coming! ^.^
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Nino/Touma, Juntoshi (side pairing: Sakuraiba)
Genre: Romance, Angst
Disclaimer: I guess Johnny’s technically owns Arashi, huh? Still not me.
Summary: Nino is feeling heartbroken after Ohno, his best friend, and Jun, the man he loves, begin to date, and simply wants some company in his misery.
A/N the first: This is actually part of an epilogue to my story Step and Go (which can be found here). I wrote the epilogue as a series of stand alones, so hopefully, even if you haven’t read the story beforehand, you can still enjoy this part if it interests you. There will be three related stories in the same universe included in this epilogue.
+++
Nino’s relationship with Touma was based on something rather depressing: unrequited love.
Nino recognized the look in Touma's eyes immediately when they had met the night the group had gotten smashed together. He was past feeling familiar with the emotion himself, after all. Touma hid it fairly well, though, and after he had finished a few beers the tinge of anxiety had almost disappeared from his eyes. But by then, Nino already knew.
Ikuta Touma was undeniably head over heels in love with Ohno.
He was hiding it as admiration, and it was possible that the star himself didn’t even realize what had happened to him, but Nino could tell. It was just one of those things he’d always been good at, reading other people. Ohno was the only one he’d ever met that had given him a run for his money, but even after all the drama that had occurred with Jun, Nino had figured things out eventually.
It was true that Nino found Touma fairly attractive, especially his cute smile and high energy, but it had taken every ounce of self control to suppress his disappointment over the loss of Jun. Ohno… Ohno was the only reason that he’d given up on the other idol, if it had been anyone else Nino would have fought them to the death.
At first he hadn’t even tried. After Jun had been complaining about Sho and Aiba’s relationship, Nino figured that there was no convincing him otherwise (as headstrong as Jun was), and that he should focus on returning the synergy to their group. That had been the original plan of his “prank” on Jun, just get him to loosen up and realize how much of an ass he was being (Sho, now he could handle that sort of criticism from someone and just tell them to back off, it was Aiba that Nino was worried about- he always had to please everyone all the time, especially a close friend, and worried himself sick when he couldn’t). After that the group would go back to normal, right?
Nino hadn’t anticipated several situations that arose from his innocent joke. Although he had always figured that Ohno had had some sort of crush on Jun, he assumed Leader would never say anything about it aloud and the two of them would continue to have a common ground based on those emotions. Through some strange circumstance, though, Ohno had confessed to Jun. Nino had sensed the new problem immediately and had assumed the reasons behind it, but even then he couldn’t believe it.
What he couldn’t believe even more was the fact that Jun liked Ohno back. After he had been spouting all of those homosexual criticisms about not having kids and a family. Yeah, Nino always knew that Jun had pretty much worshiped the ground Ohno walked on since their Hawaii debut, but he always figured that was just admiration, a leftover piece of Jun’s adolescence, not actually love.
When Nino found out, he knew he had no choice but to accept the couple. He was happy for them, really he was. If only there was some way to cut out his heart and extract the lingering attachments and wishes for Jun to only look at him, and throw them away. If only he could leave that part of himself behind and just be happy for Ohno like he so desperately wanted to be.
Afterwards, Nino easily put on a front that showed Leader (the only one who would be able to detect his real feelings and probably the only one that would care anyway) that he was fine, he was moving on, Jun hadn’t really meant that much to him. It had worked, either that or Ohno had been too distracted with Jun to really notice. Either way, it didn’t matter.
And that was another thing! It was bad enough he had to share Satoshi with fishing, now he had to share him with Matsujun as well. Even though the ex-comedy duo was still basically attached at the hip around the studio, Nino couldn’t help but think that his friend’s thoughts and attention were somewhere else half the time. It was particularly irritating.
But he was happy for them, he really was.
+++
The first night they had sex started out with an email.
Nino had taken Touma back to his place after their drunken date (he wasn’t going to lie, he was actually looking for a quick fuck to get his mind off of Jun and Ohno, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to take advantage of Touma in such a way, he already felt pathetic enough as it was). Touma had thanked him the following morning as Nino gave him some medicine for his hang over, and the two of them had played video games together for almost three hours before Touma realized the time and rushed away.
The gamer had wanted to bring up the topic of Touma’s crush on Ohno at that point, but the drama star had looked so innocent and naïve. Nino couldn’t help but think he didn’t want to be the one to bring the actor to terms with reality; he still looked so hopeful and full of energy.
Before he had gone, Nino had discreetly given him his number, making some vague promise about the two of them getting together to play video games later.
He had to admit, even though he hadn’t gotten laid, Nino felt just a little better about his situation with Juntoshi, knowing he wasn’t quite alone in his isolation. Even though Touma’s emotions were miles away from his own, he couldn’t help but feel some camaraderie with the other actor knowing they were in the same boat.
Well.
A few days later Nino had received a distraught email via cell phone.
I didn’t know who else to talk to.
Did you know Jun and Ohno are dating?
-Touma
At first his heart had jumped, knowing that Touma had joined him in his melancholy (as masochistic as that was) and then he immediately saw his opportunity for being a “comfort” to Touma.
Yeah. Do you want someone to talk to?
He almost felt guilty sending the suggestive email. Almost.
Touma had come over to his apartment again and the two of them sat on Nino’s couch while the movie star complained about how he hadn’t seen this coming and didn’t he have a reason to be surprised?
Nino nodded and mumbled a few replies when necessary, patting the younger star lightly on the back occasionally, and finally asked “You’re in love with Ohno, aren’t you?”
No, no, of course not that’s not what this is he had insisted in return, but after Nino confessed to Touma that he was in love with Jun, a tense silence fell over them. Touma looked down at his hands, his face etched with grief, and Nino left his hand lightly on Touma’s back, not drawing his eyes from the star’s face.
And then they had fucked.
Touma had been the one to initiate it (well, that might be debatable since Nino had started giving him his best ‘fuck me now’ eyes halfway through the conversation). He had leaned forward slowly and Nino hadn’t pulled away when their lips met. Touma tentatively pressed their mouths together before pulling away, only to do it again more aggressively a moment later. Nino, who had planned out each moment a step in advance, slowly began leaning back, pulling Touma on top of him on the couch. As time passed the younger star became more desperate and Nino allowed him to do whatever he wanted the harder the better.
After Nino had cried out softly as he reached his orgasm, their clothes partially discarded on the floor in front of the couch, and Touma had come back down to himself, the younger star apologized softly. Nino smiled, although the action was tinged with bitterness and melancholy, and assured him it was perfectly fine. They were both just getting their frustrations out.
+++
The next time was several weeks later. Touma sent another cell phone email, asking to come over without offering an explanation, and Nino immediately agreed. Actually, he was glad for a distraction, since he had been playing Final Fantasy on his Playstation for over 5 hours already that day.
After Nino had let him in and offered him a beer, Touma began to lightly complain about his long day at work and how he wished he had more time for himself. Nino could already see through his front, though. He had come for sex, which made the gamer even more excited at the unexpected arrival.
Just because he wasn’t getting love didn’t mean he couldn’t get laid, right? He tried not to think about how depressing that sounded and instead concentrated on the beer taste of Touma’s tongue in his mouth.
The two of them had made it to Nino’s bed this time, with almost no transition between their light talk and the suddenness of their bodies pressing against each other. The first time had been treading on new territory and trying to figure out is this really okay, I don’t even love this person, are they thinking of someone else? Now they both knew why they were there and that sex didn’t necessarily entail romantic feelings or even a relationship. It was just sex.
Harder, fuck me harder Nino said this time, between pants and grabbing tightly onto his partner’s neck, and Touma did.
By the time they were done, Nino thought his voice had gone hoarse from screaming and moaning so loudly. Touma was a Sex God. He didn’t think he could even move after having such a hard orgasm.
The gamer lay exhausted on the bed and watched Touma slowly begin reclaiming his discarded clothing.
“You can stay the night, you know.” It was already midnight by then.
Touma turned to him with a vaguely surprised look on his face.
“That’s okay. I have work tomorrow, anyway.” He turned his back to Nino and began struggling to get his briefs on.
Nino tried to get up the motivation to leave the bed as Touma made his way for the door, but in the end he couldn’t.
+++
A few days later, Nino could be found rapping his knuckles heavily on Jun’s apartment door.
It was strange. Being here, knowing that Ohno was waiting for him on the other side of the door, knowing that his two friends were going to be all lovely dovey, that he was voluntarily entering their most intimate environment did not intimidate Nino in the least. If nothing else, he felt like he needed to mix the aura up a little to keep the couple on their toes.
Although he had spared most of the details of his escapades with Touma, Nino had been keeping Ohno up to date under the pretense that they were ‘dating’. Although he hadn’t confirmed this with Touma yet, Nino somehow felt if the star was confronted with the question he would smile nervously and rub the back of his head, but go along with it. There was some unsaid bond between them now, some understanding of each other’s feelings that had brought them closer together. It almost felt like they were trying to help each other, although Nino could see their efforts had only made him hurt worse. Not only could he not have Jun, but apparently he couldn’t fully have Touma either.
Matsujun was the one to open the door, with a curious look on his face, and he raised his eyebrow upon meeting Nino’s eyes. Nino forced a smile, which he thought looked fairly genuine, and cleared his throat, pushing forward his most normal and cheery voice.
“Oh-chan’s here?”
Something clicked in Jun’s eyes and he backed away from the door, allowing Nino inside. As the gamer entered the house he noticed Jun turn and shoot a questioning (although amused) look to Ohno, who was lounging on the couch with his monthly fishing magazine.
Nino chucked and guessed “He didn’t tell you I was coming over?” as he slipped off his shoes. Jun turned back to his boyfriend with a light hearted affectionate look and mumbled a negative answer. Nino thought he might puke.
As sexy as Jun was, Nino wasn’t sure how Ohno put up with his mushy lovey kissy-ness. Well, actually he did, but Nino preferred the more subtle route himself.
The magician stepped across the room and past Jun with an air of authority. He plopped down next to Ohno on the couch, then immediately threw his feet up next to him and took his usual relaxing position with his head on Ohno’s lap.
Leader raised his magazine to accommodate Nino, then lowered it back down, never tearing his eyes away from it. Jun watched the scene as he walked into the open kitchen, where he pulled some tea out of the fridge, looking somewhere between envious and amused. That made Nino feel a little better.
He held back a mischievous smile that was threatening to break through his lips and waited for the right timing. Jun had poured himself a cup of brown tea and was bringing the glass to his lips.
“Me and Touma had sex.”
The tea shot out of Jun’s mouth and over the counter despite his efforts to cover his lips. He coughed a few times and Satoshi turned his head slightly to first look at Nino, then at Jun in the kitchen, a small smile now gracing his own lips.
Amusement was apparent in Nino’s eyes and he shared a muffled laugh with his best friend.
After only a few seconds of silence, Ohno replied comically, “Oh really? That’s great! You two are more serious than I thought!”
Nino knew that Leader would play along, if for no other reason than to see Jun squirm. “Well, not really, he’s just an animal, you know…” Nino started in a conversational tone, looking away from Satoshi to his fingers, trying to act nonchalant.
Before he could continue, Jun interrupted them from the kitchen. “Erm, I think I’ll go to the grocery store.” His voice was nervous and Nino could tell that, although it was all in good humor, Jun really didn’t want to be here for this conversation. Just as Nino had predicted.
Jun threw a paper towel, which he had used to clean up the tea with, into the garage before popping into his bedroom and then back out the front door as fast as his feet could carry him. When the door closed behind him, Nino and Ohno broke out into giggles simultaneously.
They didn’t need to exchange a that was great or did you see his face? It was all unsaid, as it had been for the last 8 or 9 years.
A comfortable silence overtook them before Kazu brought the subject that had been resting heavily on his mind.
“I just can’t help but feel that sex is sex. You know? What if he doesn’t actually like me?”
Although this concern was quite accurate in Nino’s mind, he knew that Ohno probably didn’t realize the fact that it was happening on both sides. Not only was Nino worried about Touma treating him as a substitute for Ohno, but he was worried about himself doing the same to Touma with Jun. Although that was how it had started out, Nino was realizing the error of his ways and thought that maybe, just maybe, he should try to make things work with Touma. If it was still possible.
Ohno put down his magazine, realizing that Kazu actually wanted to have a serious conversation with him, and then rubbed his chin lightly. Nino allowed him a few moments to think things through.
“Well, I think that he wouldn’t have sex with you if he didn’t really like you. At least a little.”
Blunt as always, Oh-chan.
“I don’t know… I don’t think he wants to be in a relationship with me.” Nino’s hands had unconsciously began plucking at the t-shirt he was wearing, removed nonexistent dust. “Actually, I don’t really want to be that serious either, but… I mean, how do you know if you’re being used?” Or using someone else?
Ohno looked thoughtful again, this time glancing up at the ceiling.
“Hmm. Well. I don’t think Touma-kun is that sort of person. I think he’s very genuine.” Nino sighed and wondered if he should just come out and tell Ohno more of the facts in order to get some more satisfactory answers. Not only was he hiding that fact that maybe he was the one using Touma, but also that Touma continued to be deeply and madly in love with Leader.
He sighed instead.
After another brief pause Ohno began to gently play with Nino’s hair and suggested “Maybe you should just ask him?”
Nino scoffed and looked away from Ohno. That would be the honest straightforward thing to do, yes. But Nino didn’t feel he was particularly either of those things.
“I guess so…”
Actually, the Arashi star had no intention of asking Touma about it. It would bring to the surface too many things that had been poisoning his soul in the last year, and Nino didn’t think he could deal with that yet. But, of course, he realized the longer he waited the darker his heart became. In fact, Ohno might be the only thing keeping him from locking himself in his apartment and playing Fire Emblem for 48 hours straight.
The conversation died, Ohno apparently having no other prophetic words to add to the subject, and so Nino forced a smile and asked another question that had been on his mind for a while.
“So how’s Jun in bed?”
Nino could tell Ohno was a little surprised at the question, but Kazu knew his friend wouldn’t with hold any details from him. Even if he did, the game had devised an extra-special-tickle-Ohno-until-he-reveals-everything method that was sure to succeed.
“He’s… surprisingly sweet.”
“Surprising? Are you kidding me, that guy has ‘sap bucket’ written all over him!” Nino felt jealousy rise within him, but it quelled immediately when he looked back to Ohno’s face. His neutral expression had sunk into something similar to one an affectionate puppy wore. It was for that reason that Nino was willing to go through the heartache of knowing every detail of the thing he couldn’t have. “Do you have sex a lot? How often?”
Ohno turned away, trying to cover up his shy expression (but Nino already saw it, too bad Oh-chan). “I don’t know, like every other day?”
Nino pursed his lips, trying to decide whether that was a good number or not. “I guess you’re both fairly busy, huh? Did you move in here yet?”
The older man’s gaze slowly returned to Nino’s. His eyes said something like ‘we are both busy but we’re making the most of it.’ Communicating with Satoshi was easy. Half of the understanding between them seemed to be nonverbal and for as long as Nino could remember it had been fairly accurate, too.
“I’ve left a few things here. He gave me a toothbrush, so…” Nino couldn’t hold back his smile. Yep, all Ohno needed to function on a day to day basis was his toothbrush and something related to fishing or art. In Ninomiya’s opinion, Ohno was a fairly easy person to please and accommodate, especially for being an idol.
“You’ve been staying, then? I guess you have to if you want to get any.” The gamer showed another gleaming smile, although it was somewhat forced. “He makes you orgasm, right?
Leader blinked a few times before he answered. “Of course.” There was an awkward silence for a second before Satoshi continued with the obvious embarrassing question. “There are some people that don’t?” Nino laughed at the dumbfounded look on Ohno’s face and decided he’d leave the ‘unhealthy relationship’ talk for another day when he wasn’t feeling quite so miserable.
The two of them fell into silence again, Nino eyeing Jun’s Super Nintendo out of the corner of his eye. He turned back to Ohno, surprised that he hadn’t picked up his magazine after the lapse in conversation.
“So, Touma’s an animal, huh?” There was an interested twinkle in his eye. Nino felt a surge of shyness, which he immediately pushed back, since he considered himself a confident sort of person, and besides he was the one that had brought up the topic, anyway.
“Uh, yeah.” Nino averted his eyes before he continued. “He made me cum so hard I almost passed out.”
Ohno replied with a sound that was part scoff and part laugh. “Seriously?”
Nino nodded with a small smile on his lips. Actually, he didn’t really want to talk about him and Touma anymore. He was getting anxious about the whole situation instead of becoming relieved like he had hoped. Nino knew that he was doing the wrong thing by encouraging Touma to keep coming back to him, but… he couldn’t help it. It was too comforting to know that someone with the same feelings was with him.
He felt Ohno’s hand slowly start to move through his hair again and Nino sighed happily. Satoshi certainly knew when to let things drop (either that or he was just too lazy to think of something else to say). Although he hadn’t gotten any answers or advice that was particularly helpful, it was probably worthwhile to talk about some of his problems with his best friend.
A smile still plastered on his face, Nino turned to the oversized media center in front of them and suggested they play a little Mario before Jun came back and kicked him out.
+++
This was the worst.
Absolutely the worst.
The night before, after they had had sex, Touma had mumbled something about the two of them meeting Jun and Ohno for lunch the next day.
Nino had had to ask “Excuse me?”
But, here they were. For some Godforsaken reason Jun had decided the four of them needed to start hanging out more. Nino couldn’t help but think it was one of two things: either Ohno and Jun had shared some pillow talk (Nino knew that Ohno wouldn’t betray him like that, but he wasn’t about to underestimate Jun and his ability to get what he wanted) or Jun was simply getting revenge for the tea incident.
This… was not good. Nino didn’t think he could stand to watch Touma around Ohno and he didn’t want to show himself to his partner in this position either. This would only get worse and fragment their relationship even more than it already was.
But Touma wasn’t the sort of person to turn down a friend, especially when he had absolutely no reason to. And Nino couldn’t tell him no after looking into those dark puppy dog eyes.
He still hadn’t stayed over the night before, though.
Jun and Ohno would arrive together, of course. Since Nino and Touma were masquerading as a couple (Nino was surprised that he hadn’t even had to talk with the younger actor about that) the two of them met up a few minutes before hand and planned to arrive together. It was almost like they needed each other’s support in order to make it through the afternoon.
As Nino and Touma approached the designated meeting spot, a park near their studio that was almost completely hidden between the skyscrapers that were so common in Tokyo, Nino abruptly stopped as soon as he saw his two band mates.
They were seated on a bench across from a sign that announced the name of the park, far earlier than they needed to be, of course. Although Nino could tell they were trying to be discreet, their hands were intertwined, half hidden behind them, and they were chatting idly, stupid grins on both of their faces.
Nino felt his heart drop. This was not going to turn out well. He couldn’t move forward any farther.
The gamer watched as Jun released Ohno’s hand and reached up to touch Leader’s hair almost unconsciously, both of them lost in their conversation and looking at each other. Satoshi’s expression didn’t seem to change, but Nino could tell by the subtle lift of his mouth and the crinkling of his eyes that he was in bliss right now.
Nino gulped and finally averted his eyes. God, he couldn’t do this. He was going to turn around and-
Before he could move Nino felt Touma grab his hand.
After swallowing his nervousness, the idol slowly looked back at the couple on the park bench. As he turned (he felt Touma give his hand a firm squeeze) Jun’s eyes suddenly met his, and the star smiled over at the two of them holding hands. Nino forced a shy smile and allowed Touma to pull him over to the waiting couple, thankful for the strength of the other star.
Sneaking a look at his date, Nino thought maybe I can make it through this after all.
+++
The two of them had made it through lunch without incident (actually it had almost been pleasant) and Nino thought that Touma deserved a reward.
Touma, unfortunately, had to return to work afterwards, but the two of them had been on the same wavelength: Touma had come back over again that evening, despite the fact that they had had sex only the night before.
But something felt different tonight. As soon as the other star was inside the door, Nino was there, pressing their lips together.
Touma gave him a pleased smile (Oh God, he was so adorable) and placed his hand lightly on Nino’s waist. The gamer offered him something to drink, distractedly pulling at the jacket his partner was wearing as they stood in the doorway. Touma rejected the offer and instead pulled the shorter man back to him for another kiss.
They were naked and tumbling into Nino’s bed a few moments later. The singer wrapped his bare legs around Touma’s hips as the actor pressed him against the bed, their mouths open in a sloppy kiss.
Nino allowed the other idol a few more seconds of dominance before he gently pushed Touma off of him. “Wait,” his voice was low and heavy with passion, “you lay down right here.” He directed Touma to the spot next to him, and Nino pushed himself up and over so he could straddle him. He touched the actor’s chest lightly, just as impressed with his toned muscles as he had been the first time they’d had sex. Touma’s hands had found their way to the outside of Nino’s thighs and they were rubbing up to his waist and then back down his legs impatiently.
“Nino,” he was still calling him Nino after all of this. “Nino, what’re you-“ The gamer touched Touma’s lips lightly with his forefinger, giving him a sultry look that said ‘shut the hell up’.
Nino leaned back and collected a bottle of lube from a pillow, where the idol has stored it earlier for ease of use. With a smirk he poured some lightly onto Touma’s chest (the younger man was watching every moment Nino was making, still trying to figure out exactly why he had been made to wait) and slowly began spreading it around by making circles with his fingers. Touma’s hands had come to rest on Nino’s hips, where they were gripping with moderate strength, as if the actor needed something to hold onto as an anchor. The younger man’s mouth was slightly parted, his tongue darting out every few seconds to wet his lips, his eyes still glued to Nino’s skinny body and was apparently trying to anticipate his next movement.
Still not offering an explanation, Nino lifted a hand, which was covered in the oil he had been spreading across Touma’s chest, and subtly moved it behind him. As Touma watched, Nino lifted his hips up and forward, inserting his own finger in his ass in order to prepare for the mind-blowing sex he would be having soon enough. Although the position was a little off and Nino knew he wasn’t doing as an effective of a job as Touma usually did, he could already see what effect his display was having on his partner. The hands at his hips were gripping harder, massaging his skin unconsciously.
Nino let out a soft mew, more in anticipation of what was to come rather than particularly pleasing himself, and Touma’s eyes grew a little brighter, a little wilder. He leaned up and forward, but Nino pressed him down with his other hand.
“Not yet.” He started gently massaging the oil into the younger idol’s chest again, the other hand still working as his back. He began thrusting his hips forward a little for effect.
After he felt he had done enough, Nino removed his hand and slid back towards the edge of the bed, resting on top of Touma’s shins, and forcing the younger idol to release his tender hips. He leaned down, attention fully on Touma’s erection, and grasped it firmly in his oily hands. He gave it a few pumps, watching his lover's reaction through his eyelashes, and then took it his mouth.
Upon the contact, Touma’s head leaned back, then immediately forward again; Nino could tell he was forcing his eyes open in order to watch him and the gamer wasn’t surprised. This was the first time he’d given oral to the other idol, despite the many times they’d had sex. Touma had done him before, but Nino wasn’t the sort of person to give something so valuable (and leverage-able) away on the first date.
He ran his tongue over the head in circles, using one of his hands to pump up and down like he had before. Touma was moaning now and several obscene phrases had left his mouth. His hand came to rest on the back of Nino’s head, tangling in the hair that Ohno so often played with, and pushed Nino down his cock further. The Arashi member only tolerated it because he was rewarding Touma for being so sweet and supportive that afternoon.
Nino took as much of the cock into his mouth as he could, and began making a growling noise in the back of his throat. Touma had done that to him and it had been amazing.
“Stop, Nino. St-stop.” Nino let the thing of his mouth with a pop and gave Touma his best innocent look. The younger idol’s cheeks were flushed and he was panting with his mouth half open, and although it looked like he was on the verge of an orgasm, Nino knew too well that Touma had more consideration for his partner than that. They would cum together.
The younger idol tried to push himself up again, but Nino once more pushed him back down. It was a reward, after all.
The gamer slid back up and positioned himself on top of Touma’s hips again, the anticipation of having the other man inside of him almost making his hands shake.
Lifting up the erection with one of his hands, the other one steadying himself on Touma’s stomach, Nino slowly moved it between his legs and placed it at his entrance. He tried to take it in slowly, but for God’s sake he wanted it right now. Using his weight as leverage, Nino engulfed Touma’s cock in seconds, eventually resting his ass cheeks against the younger man’s hips. As he pushed down (far faster than he should have, it stung a little bit), Touma let out a rather loud cry, which sounded like he had been caught off guard, and his hands were once again at Nino’s hips, gasping so hard it was starting to hurt.
“Oh God, oh God, fuck fuck fuck…” In the end, Touma’s hip had thrust up to meet Nino, the curses flying out of his mouth in moans. The gamer needed a second to adjust, as apparently did Touma, since Nino was sure he had felt the younger man cum a little bit inside him already.
He took a deep breath, trying to relax, before using his thigh muscles to lift himself up a few inches, and then press back down. One of Touma’s eyes was crinkled shut, but Nino could tell his partner was ready to go for a while, probably because he had let a little out a few seconds before.
Finally getting used to the feeling (it was the first time he’d ever rode Touma, up until now it had been pretty basic missionary style), Nino began bouncing himself up and down, trying to find that spot in there that Touma seemed to have no problem locating most of the time. He leaned back a little, using his knees to balance instead of his hand, confident that Touma’s grip on his hips and his position on the bed would be enough to hold him up.
Oh, that was it, right there. Nino let out a shaky moan as Touma’s cock found his prostate. The gamer let his own efforts wane as Touma began thrusting up into him, concentrating on just keeping himself up as his head fell back of its own accord and his eyes drifted shut.
It wasn’t like usual. Nino felt like he was being teased, not fucked into the headboard of the bed. Although the little pulses of heat were still crossing his face, they weren’t as intense as they had been and Nino needed more.
His head fell forward again and he unconsciously stared at Touma, whose face was etched in concentration as he looked at Nino’s hips.
“Touma…” Nino’s voice was low and soft and he wasn’t sure if his partner had heard him.
With the next thrust, Touma stopped completely inside of him, then met Nino’s gaze. Without asking, he used his hands to flip Nino over onto the bed, the gamer automatically wrapping his legs around Touma’s hips again, and anchored himself above Nino’s head with his hands pressing into the sheets.
Using all his weight, he began to thrust inside of him again.
Right away, Nino let out a loud moan. He was hitting exactly the right spot; this time a flash of heat crossed his face instead of just a pulse.
“Ah, ah, ah!” Nino let out a sound with every thrust Touma made. “Harder, please harder.”
Nino grabbed onto the metal headboard of his bed as Touma’s thrusts sped up and the entire frame began to shake.
Fuck, fuck. Every time. Every time it was the right spot the one that made Nino forget to breath, the one that stopped all brain functions.
Nino couldn’t keep his eyes open any more as his vision turned white. He hadn’t even touched his own cock, son of a-
He came hard, his back arching high off the bed, while he screamed out Touma’s name. He forced his eyes open, just a silver, to catch Touma’s pleasured face as he came too, which made the after waves of his orgasm that much more intense.
Touma fell on top of him a few seconds later, breathing heavily. The two of them lay on the bed together while Nino tried to get his brain working again, even just enough to figure out what time of night it was.
The first thought to mind was I hope Touma enjoyed his reward and the second one was that lube is stickier than I thought it was.
Blinking down at the younger man several times, trying to clear his vision, Nino rubbed his hand through his own hair. Tonight had felt like real relationship sex, not I’m-using-you-to-get-to-somebody-else sex. It had felt good. It had felt twice as good as the pity sex they’d been having up until now.
He couldn’t help but smile.
Touma looked up at him, a content grin spreading across his face too, and he raised an eyebrow in a teasing question.
Needless to say, that night, he stayed.
+++
Nino grinned to himself, stuffing his gamboy quickly into the shoulder bag he was using today. It had been about a week since the night that something had changed between him and Touma, and ever since then the gamer had been on cloud nine. They had been out on a date (well, they hadn’t said it was a date, but Nino thought there was no mistaking it) and Touma stayed over again the next time they had sex.
Today they had made arrangements to hang out at Nino’s apartment. Touma had agreed to help Nino beat Super Smash Brothers on two player story mode, and although Nino wasn’t sure whether it he was just being humored or Touma actually enjoyed video games that much, they were going to play either way.
Because of a mismatch of schedules, Touma was going to come to the Arashi Studio and pick him up, and Nino assumed they’d probably grab some food on the way home. He was actually really excited, the first 100% genuine time since before he’d decided to play that prank on Jun. They would play some video games, maybe have some sex, maybe snuggle a little bit. There were butterflies in Nino’s stomach and warmth in his chest.
He was trying to hurry (he was sure Touma had come in a few minutes ago) since he’d been the last one out of the studio and then had to collect his things. Ohno, who never carried anything with him, had left almost ten minutes ago, and Jun, who was the only other member who had to pull together his stuff too, had made it out the door a few minutes before. Nino suddenly realized he hadn’t even noticed the time he’d had alone with the other idol.
Finally slinging the bag over his shoulder, Nino rushed out of the dressing room and into the filming studio, where Touma had said he would be waiting. He had probably been early enough to catch the end of the show, which made Nino even giddier than he already was. It was bliss, knowing that someone was waiting for him to get off work so they could go home together.
Slowing down and taking a few deep breaths to calm his panting, the gamer slowly slid open the door to the mostly-empty studio. Immediately he noticed Touma, who was sitting in the front row of the audience stands, and then Ohno, who was seated to his right. They were chatting lightly, Touma explaining something with his hands and Ohno smiling and nodding in response. They seemed to be caught up in the conversation, as they hadn’t even noticed Nino enter the room.
The gamer turned, trying to find Matsujun. Where was he? He needed to pull his boyfriend away from-
Jun was standing a few feet away from where Nino had stopped, right inside the door way. The younger star was glaring at the two seated together across from him with his arms crossed. Although Nino would admit that he was feeling annoyed and maybe a little pissed, Jun looked absolutely irate.
But he wasn’t moving or saying anything. He looked about as immobile as Nino felt.
Nino turned back to the couple, his eyebrows creasing down and a frown spreading across his lips as Touma chuckled loudly at something Ohno said to him.
Damn it. What could he do besides wait here for Touma to look at him? The more time that passed, the more pissed off and discouraged the gamer started to feel.
Fine. Fine. Nino didn’t care. He’d go home and play games without the person he was allegedly dating, the one that was supposed to be looking at him, not flirting with his band mate and best friend right in front of his Goddamned face.
A list of obscenities came to Nino’s mind as he let the anger take over. He bit his lip, trying not to let it show too much. Not that anyone was looking at him.
As he was taking a deep breath, trying to quell his emotions and be rational about this situation, Nino noticed Aiba slowly start walking across the room. Had he been here this whole time? The gamer turned his head slightly and noticed Sho-chan sitting in one of the chairs to his right, where Aiba had just come from. He was looking at him with curiosity (and possibly pity?) in his eyes. The rapper offered him a nervous smile, and then turned away, back to where Aiba was standing.
Even as the klutz approached the couple, they didn’t turn to look at him until the last possible moment. Touma was chatting lightly, looking at Ohno with another carefree innocent smile, and he only paused when Aiba was standing directly in front of them with his hand on his hips.
Aiba looked down at him with an annoyed expression and raised an eyebrow.
“You know it’s rude to flirt with someone else while your boyfriend is watching.” He looked back and forth between Touma and Ohno, obviously addressing them both.
Simultaneously, the two of them turned their heads to look towards the door, where Nino and Jun were almost standing right next to each other. Ohno blinked at Jun few times, his expression returning to neutrality, but Touma’s face immediately shifted into an oh shit face.
Nino mentally thanked Aiba for doing what he, and apparently Jun, couldn’t, and then promptly turned and walked back out the studio door.
+++
It was about twenty minutes after Nino got home that a knock came to his apartment door.
Knowing it was probably Touma, Nino seethed on the couch for about a minute before he couldn’t stop himself from standing and approaching the entrance.
He opened the door with a frown on his face, ready to tell Touma to get the hell out. If he wanted to pursue Ohno again, that was fucking fine with him. They could go their separate ways and stop causing each other anxiety and heart ache.
The words died on his lips at the nervous and sad look on the younger star’s face. Without a word, Nino sighed and allowed the person he was still ‘dating’ into his apartment.
Afterwards, he didn’t look at him again (if he did, Nino knew he would cave in an instant). Although the whole episode didn’t seem like it was that big of a deal, Nino couldn’t help but think past the simple fact that Touma had been enjoying Ohno’s company.
All sorts of insecurities came to Nino’s mind after witnessing the casual chattering between the two friends. Did Touma actually like him, like he’d been starting to think? Maybe the younger actor was still using him to get close to Ohno, or even as a replacement for him. What if it had only been Nino that had sensed the change in their relationship and Touma still thought they were just fucking for fun?
Nino plopped down on the couch and stared out the floor length widow against the wall, watching Touma slowly approach him with his peripheral vision. The younger actor stopped a few feet behind him, rubbing the back of his head, and Nino refused to turn and look at him.
Touma audibly swallowed and whispered his name. Nino looked down at his small hands and tried to decide if he would drag this out any longer or just confront Touma about it.
When the gamer didn’t respond, the younger actor slowly walked past him and sat next to him on the couch, trying to decide if Nino was going to stop him, by the look on his face. Nino glanced up quickly, but immediately returned his gaze to his hands collected in his lap.
“S-sorry…” Touma finally offered, resting his hand lightly on the back of the couch and leaning closer to Nino. It was obvious he knew why Nino was upset; after all, their entire relationship up until a few days ago had been based on their unrequited love for the other Arashi members.
Nino had already given Jun to Ohno, he didn’t think he could let Touma go, too. He finally looked up and met the puppy dog eyes.
“It’s-“ he tried to start, but nothing came out. He’d thought to say something like It’s not a big deal, but it was a big deal and he wouldn’t let it drop without working it out. Even if that meant letting Touma go.
“Nino,” Touma started after the gamer had stopped. “Ohno-“ he swallowed nervously after letting out the name, “Ohno is a friend,” he started, gently touching the gamer’s knee.
Nino broke in, trying to hold back the depression that was welling up in his chest. “I know, I know, you guys are still-“ his voiced almost cracked as he started talking and he was ashamed to think that he sounded like he would start sobbing any second. Thankfully, Touma began talking again before he could continue and further embarrass himself.
“Ohno is a friend.” He moved his hand to touch Nino’s cheek. “You’re the one I’m dating.”
Nino swallowed and tried to digest the underlying meaning of those words.
Touma leaned forward and Nino couldn’t tear his eyes away from his lover’s. He was genuinely serious; he had meant every word that he’d said. The weight in Nino’s chest was slowly disappearing, being replaced with relief, and the gamer tried to force himself to understand. He couldn’t prevent Ohno and Touma from talking and being friends. It was inevitable, especially with Nino in the middle of them. He’d just have to make sure he was with them all the time, listening in on their conversations, and making sure Touma’s affections didn’t drift away from him.
After hovering for a second with their faces a few centimeters apart, Touma finished filling the distance and pressed his lips against Nino’s. It was a cliché kiss, but Nino didn’t mind. Predictable didn’t necessarily mean bad.
When Nino didn’t push him away, Touma wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled their bodies closer together. He deepened the kiss, forcing his tongue past Nino’s lips, and ran it over the pearly teeth. Nino felt his shirt being slowly lifted up from behind, and he gently pushed Touma away, breaking the contact between the couple.
“Wait. Just, wait.” Nino blinked a few times and took a deep breath. “Before we do anything else, I just need to,” he paused, trying to collect the words he wanted to use, “I need to tell you that I really like you, you know, not like oh, we’re dating but like, if this continues I’m never going to let you even look at another man, or woman. I mean, this is a commitment, you know, and I just want you to know what you’re getting yourself into, you’re eventually going to have to take responsibility, you know.” Nino knew he was rambling, his words eventually running together, but he couldn’t stop himself. What he had really wanted to say was I think I love you, but, of course, it hadn’t come out that easily.
Touma’s face broke out in a grin. “I take full responsibility,” he responded cheerfully, nodding his head for emphasis.
Nino’s brow furrowed at the response, initially unsure of what that was supposed to mean. Well, if the gamer had meant to say ‘I love you’ he could only assume that response was ‘I love you, too’.
Nino tried to hold back a smile that threatened to burst through his mouth (he was supposed to be pissed off and upset after all). With a neutral expression he replied “Alright” and gave Touma his own nod. The younger idol jumped forward and refastened their lips together, catching Nino slightly off guard, and wrapped his arms tightly around Nino’s midsection.
After getting a hold of the situation, the gamer allowed the smile through as Touma kissed him, and rested his hands lightly on his boyfriend’s back. He had been lying earlier; this was bliss.
Only a few seconds later, Nino pushed him off again and suggested they head into the bedroom. Touma responded with another smile and nod, pulling Nino off the couch by the hand. Before they had made it all the way to Nino’s bed, the younger idol had pulled the older one back into his arms, initiating the kiss yet again. He ran his tongue over Nino’s lips for only a second, before breaking away to take Nino’s shirt off.
They undressed each other, as was customary now, and then began kissing again, one of Nino’s hands resting on Touma’s cheek and the other on his shoulder. Touma tilted his head to one side, thrusting his tongue farther into the gamer’s mouth, and greedily running his hands anywhere they would reach.
Nino was feeling special tonight, but he wasn’t sure if wanting to make it last would beat out wanting to have sex right now. Touma’s hand was grabbing his ass and pushing their hips painfully close together, and Nino could already feel the desperation he experienced whenever he had sex with Touma come on full force.
Pulling away, Touma’s arms resting on his lower back, Nino looked up at him with his best (and often practiced) fuck me look.
“Touma, I want you inside of me right now.” The younger star’s eyes began to sparkle and his fingers pressed sharply into Nino’s back before he swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down quickly.
“Lay down on the bed,” he directed, turning away from Nino and retrieving the lube. Nino immediately complied, although he usually didn’t like to be bossed around (if it would get him some sex with Touma faster, he didn’t care), and plopped back onto the bed. He raised his knees up, presenting Touma with a clear view of his posterior, and watched the younger idol hastily spread some lube on his own erection.
Touma licked his lips before pressing one of his slick fingers into Nino, who was relaxed enough that it immediately slid all the way up to his knuckle. Yeah, that felt so much better than his own fingers. Nino raised his hips off the bed a little as his lover added another finger, and re-dispersed his weight onto his elbows. Touma’s long fingers were deeper in him than his own stubby digits would go, and over time the younger idol had figured out that bending them forward just slightly would hit Nino’s prostate occasionally, and doing so would make Nino start writhing and arching his back, like he was doing now.
Nino let out an impatient pant and threw an irritated look at his lover, who hadn’t torn his gaze away from Nino’s ass yet. The gamer’s hip buckled up as Touma ran his finger across his prostate one more time, before he basically yelled “For God’s sake, Touma, fuck me.”
The younger idol let out a low chuckle, finally glancing up at Nino's face, but withdrew his fingers and gave his own erection a few more pumps before directing it to the place his fingers had been playing with a moment before.
He pushed in slowly, agonizingly slowly, grabbing tightly onto Nino’s hips as he did so. Nino sucked in some air quickly between his teeth, the feeling of being stretched only adding to his heightened senses. It was true, make up sex was definitely amazing; it added a whole new aspect to the experience.
When he was in all the way, Touma paused, one of his eyes twitching in pleasure, and waited a few seconds to get a hold of himself. Nino took a few more deep breaths, then tried to think of some way to express his impatience to his lover.
Touma, who was breathing fairly heavily himself and still hadn’t moved his hips yet, suddenly reached forward and grabbed one of Nino’s hands. He shifted their weight a little so that he could bring the intertwined hands towards his mouth, eventually kissing the back of Nino’s knuckles lightly.
“What’re you doing?” Nino was not amused, he wanted to start some fucking-
Touma’s tongue darted out as he spread Nino’s hand open, licking the valley between the gamer’s fore and middle finger, and Nino lost his train of thought.
“What’re you doing?” he asked again, this time more desperate and almost scared. “Don’t put that-“
Too late, Touma had already taken his middle finger into his mouth and was erotically sucking on the digit. The only other thing that Nino was feeling besides that mouth was his ass throbbing around Touma’s cock.
He shamelessly moaned as Touma released the finger and licked his way to the next one, repeating the same process over on the next digit.
Oh God, why was he doing this? Nino’s fingers were stubby, unattractive, dirty. He hated it when people looked at them, and he wouldn’t let anyone but Leader explicitly touch or exam them.
But even worse, the most irritating thing that Nino had ever discovered, was that his fingers brought him pleasure. In God’s name, of all places why did it have to be his hands?
And the only other person alive who knew that was-
“This is what you were talking about?” Nino’s voice was shaky and he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the scene Touma was making devouring his fingers.
Touma didn’t respond, just continued his trail of licks and kisses as Nino twitched on the bed underneath him. His expression said Nino’s guess was right on the dot, though.
“Oh...G-God, stop…” Nino’s eyes squeezed shut and he pressed his head to the side, trying to quell the waves of passion that were coursing through him by that small movements. He was going to kill Leader, he would lock him up in the studio with no fishing and no Jun for the next year…
Touma began mumbling against his knuckles. It took Nino a second to make the words out through the daze in his head.
“I wonder why your fingers look so dirty, only to me?”
“Oh my God, are you reciting Gimmick Game lyr-“
Suddenly, the same time that Touma took Nino’s ring finger into his mouth, he withdrew his hips and thrust into Nino with perfect aim, firmly hitting his prostate.
The gamer let out a breathless gasp and his back arched completely off the mattress. His eyes almost rolled into the back of his head, and all Nino could see were white spots dancing around the ceiling.
Touma thrust into him again, twirling his tongue around the end of Nino’s fingers and it was all the idol could do to keep breathing.
The younger star sped up his movements, somehow managing to keep his hips on target and still run his tongue down the inside of Nino’s palm (the gamer’s arm was actually dead weight by this point). Nino was alternating between moaning, cursing, and screaming Touma’s name, unsure which he was doing at any particular moment. After five or six thrusts, Nino’s back still arched completely off the bed, he pushed his head into the blankets underneath him, his vocals suddenly stopping on his open lips.
His body had been taken over by pleasure. He wasn’t even sure what his name was at this point, just that he was going to burst and that he was going to die and that he was fine with that.
The white spots finally spread wide enough to blind him and Nino stopped breathing.
A few seconds later, pleasure still coursing through him full force, Nino’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and he lost consciousness.
+++
What appeared to be only a few minutes afterwards, Nino blinked his eyes open, unable to move his body otherwise. He was in the same position they’d been having sex in, only now his arms were spread out to either side and his legs were hanging off the bed. He vaguely heard Touma shuffling around the room outside of his field of vision, but Nino wasn’t conscious enough to even lift his head up.
“God, are you okay?” Touma leaned over him with a wet towel in hand. Nino tried to lift his legs; he could barely move them, but it was enough to tell that Touma had come inside him. That’s all he wanted to know, since there was a vague worry at the back of his mind that his passing out had cost Touma his orgasm.
Nino forced a lopsided smile at him. “Y-yeah…” His voice sounded hoarse, even to himself.
Touma’s palm swept the wet hair from his forehead and rested there for a second, checking his temperature.
“It’s your fault.”
Touma couldn’t hold back a triumphant smile, although he had apparently tried to do so. His hand gently moved from Nino’s forehead to his cheek, and he was giving the gamer the sweetest sappiest look that he ever had. Nino thought through his daze maybe I can live with sweet and sappy after all.
After a moment, Touma still leaning over him, Nino gave him a devious look.
“So please. Don’t touch me with those dirty fingers.” Touma looked taken aback for a second before realization crossed his face.
His expression turned thoughtful for a moment before he continued “Why do the colors of the town look so vibrant? Is that because I'm becoming dirty too?” He smiled down at Nino again, still looking sappy.
“Is it?” Nino finished off the verse, returning Touma’s warm expression. “Since when have you listened to my music?”
Touma chuckled. “I’ve always listened to Arashi’s music.”
“That’s not Arashi’s music. That’s my solo,” Nino pointed out. Touma finally plopped on the bed next to Nino, resting on his side and still naked from their bout of sex, and the gamer finally got up the energy to turn his head in order to continue looking at his lover.
“Uh, well… I mean… We are dating…”
Nino raised an eyebrow at Touma’s embarrassed expression. Although he found the look absolutely adorable, he wasn’t going to show it quite yet. He wanted to hear why Touma knew the lyrics to his solo.
The younger idol continued speaking nervously after the stern look and silent response from Nino. “Well, uh, I was just curious, so one day I did a video search of your name…” Touma turned away from him, facing the ceiling, and rubbed his hand through his hair nervously. Nino felt butterflies start to flutter in his stomach. “The first thing to come up was a fanvideo of that song at one of your concerts.” He paused again, but Nino still didn’t interject (even though he was tempted to lecture Touma about how much Johnny hated illegal recordings despite the publicity and the fan tracking they caused). “When I watched you dancing and heard the lyrics you were singing…” Touma trailed off again, this time swallowing as if the video had had some real impact on him. “God, you’re so sexy,” he finally admitted after a moment of silence, turning back to Nino.
The younger idol leaned across the bed and gently pressed their lips together again, Nino still unable to really move from his spot.
“You want to go again? Because you’re going to have to give me a minute.”
Touma grinned sheepishly and shook his head.
“No, but can we snuggle? I’m tired,” he admitted, resting his hand lightly on Nino’s side, on top of his ribcage.
Nino blinked at him a few times, and then replied. “Fine. But you’ll have to move me.”
+++
A/N: Hee hee, how did you like it?
I feel like I took a lot of risks in this chapter. The style was a little different (a little more choppy) than Step and Go, although I think it worked fairly well. I also tried for some angst, which I don't think I'll ever be able to write properly. I was only going to write one full sex scene, since it would've been three times longer otherwise, but you can thank yarukizero for the last part. I asked for some suggestions on the ending and she suggested moar sex. ^.^ Speaking of that part, there were three things there I wasn't sure about: Nino's fetish (omg, the first fetish sex scene I've written har har), inserting the lyrics to Gimmick Game (I don't care much for songfics, but those lyrics just fit the whole angst too well), and Nino passing out (I had to do some research on that, since I don't know anyone let alone a man who's passed out from sex). I really hope it was good instead of overdone. >.>;
By the way, I really like to write Nino, the more I see him the more he grows on me, which is weird since I haven't liked him much since I first got into the fandom. ^.^; He's like the only member of Arashi that is sarcastic, really. Even when Jun is upset I think he's pretty straightforward...although that may just be a Japanese thing...ANYWAY, I'm a pretty big video game nerd, too, I'm sure you picked that up in the subtle game references. >.>;
So, I hope you enjoyed this. There's two more sections coming! ^.^