[when the feed comes on, it is sudden and scratchy, lying at an angle on the floor. it's obviously been knocked over]
--My goodness! This just can't be? Where am I?! Oh dear! Why, this is certainly not Ponyville at all!
[little white legs run across the screen to the right, accompanied by trotting noises]
And this can't be my room! [then to the
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Oh man, oh man, I... No way... It's gotta be... And you can even talk... oh man... [He takes a deep breath.] H-Heeey, Widow-maker, is that you, ol' buddy, ol' pal?! It's your bestest best partner, Pecos Bill, I mean- I'm not really him but I'm doing his job so- aw dude, this is just freaking awesome! You sound lost! No worries, okay?! I'll come find you even if I gotta look everywhere in this crazy place!
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What? Who's that? Who's there?!
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Why... you're not a pony at all!
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Of course I am! Are you really a human?
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Mm. I am. You've never talked to a human before?
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Calm down and take a deep breath.
You're on an island called Arcanarum, and there should be a letter somewhere in your room from the rulers of this place that explains why you've been brought here.
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A... a letter?
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[she picks up the note in her mouth and then goes back to lie on the floor to read it, in front of the screen] Let's see... It says I'm here to... replace a young daughter...?
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oh god.]
What...! What are you supposed to be?!
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I, sir, am a pony. Or, to be more precise, a unicorn.
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[ he says this in an attempted deep voice, like an announcer ]
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