Gender Bender Chapter 9
Ichigo sat beside the small bed, listening to machines beep, looking like the worst kind of death, with circles under his eyes so deep he looked nearly skeletal. But stress and a full night without sleep can do that to you.
They'd managed to stabilize Renji's condition, leaving her to her slumber while Urahara worked feverishly to cure her. Ichigo waited by her side, talking aimlessly about anything that came to mind, just so that she could hear his voice. Urahara had told him that she was lost, that talking to her might help her find her way back, and Ichigo was desperate for that to be true. He wanted Renji back, the old Renji, the old stupid, loud, i'll-punch-you-in-the-face-for-no-good-reason Renji. He missed him, more than he cared to admit. He wanted this whole ordeal to be over...
Urahara came in, sighing as he went to check the machines for what seemed to be the thousandth time, and his expression was grim as he observed the results.
"What's wrong?" Ichigo asked, looking exhausted and hollow.
"There's no improvement... Renji's struggling..."
Ichigo frowned, even deeper than usual. "What can I do? There's gotta be something."
Urahara looked thoughtful. "There might be something..."
-//-
Now Ichigo was laying on another small cot, looking across at Renji's pale face with an apprehensive expression. "You're sure this'll work?" he asked, looking dubious.
"Renji needs strong reiatsu to feed the part that is still a shinigami. Yours is perfect for the job since the two of you have similar reiatsu already."
"We do?"
"Yes, the two of you actually sync in battle almost seamlessly. It's remarkable to watch."
Ichigo hadn't known that before, it was just another thing to think about. When and if this "procedure" worked.
"I have an anesthetic here for you, Kurosaki-kun. Remember, when your reiatsu meshes, your minds might come together as well. It'll be disorienting, but do what you can." Ichigo nodded and Urahara pierced a small needle into his shoulder.
"Count back from ten."
"Ten, nine, eight, seve..."
-//-
It was cold, that was the first thing Ichigo noticed. When he raised his head he felt like his skin was numb from it. All around him there were plants, but the plants were frosted over, decaying in the cold, dying. The ground under him seemed unstable, fragile, Like, if he stepped wrong, it would crumble beneath him.
The fabric of Renji's soul....
He struggled to his feet, blinking and looking around. He was wearing his shinigami robes now, looking down at himself, feeling Zangetsu's weight on his back. He started walking, not really caring what direction he was going in. There wasn't an east or west here.
He caught a flash of red out of the corner of his eye, turning quickly. When he looked again he could see the tiniest hint of that red a short distance away, so he followed.
He came to some sort of clearing, with a frozen over pond and dry, brown grass where it was no doubt supposed to be green.
Renji waited there, but it was a side of Renji that Ichigo hadn't even realized how much he'd longed to see. It was Renji, male Renji, the real Renji, laying back on the grass with his eyes closed and his skin pale, looking almost at fragile as the world around him and at the same time like he was holding this entire world together.
"Renji!" He couldn't help the smile on his face, even though he knew that it wasn't exactly a happy reunion.
Renji opened his eyes, blinking and sitting up, turning to look at Ichigo, looking confused as he looked over at the other man.
"Renji!" Ichigo called again, rushing towards him, knocking the redhead back onto the ground as he wrapped his arms around him and crushed their lips together. "It's you. Really you!"
"Ichigo?" Renji pulled away, a little dizzy, looking up at Ichigo, just as confused by the sudden kiss as he was by the boy's presence. "What are you doin' here? How are you here?"
Ichigo face was flushed, though it was more from excitement at seeing Renji than any sort of embarrassment.
"Urahara is using my reiatsu to help you. I don't know how it works. But that's how I'm here I guess."
Renji sat up a bit again, watching the boy in his lap with eyes that were almost disbelieving.
"You sure you're not just a hallucination? It's been lonely here... With Zabimaru gone..."
His eyes were so dark and sad, Ichigo felt every protective instinct inside him welling up and demanding that he do something. He started by getting off of Renji's lap and standing, reaching out a hand. "I'm really here, Renji. I promise. Let's go look for Zabimaru, alright? You're probably just to thick to notice him when you were looking before."
Renji just shook his head, not rising up to the insult, just looking up at Ichigo with an uncharacteristically solemn expression. "It's no use. I've already looked. When I first got here I was freaked out, runnin' around everywhere, I didn't even realize that I was back to normal..." He slowly got to his feet, turning away from Ichigo so that he faced the frozen pond. "When I did notice, I realized that this is the last part of me that's still... me..." He sighed. "An' this part of me is dyin'..."
"Don't say shit like that! You're not dying!"
"Ain't I? Look around, Ichigo! This place is fallin' apart! I'm fallin' apart." He scoffed. "What d'you care anyway? You like that other me better anyway!"
"That's not true!" Ichigo yelled, getting up into Renji's face with glaring eyes. "I liked you! I always did! You just never noticed until all of this happened!" He poked a finger into Renji's chest, looking stern and pissed. "You talked about how I 'looked' at you? I've always looked at you like that! Who doesn't? You walk into the room and everyone's eyes are on you, it doesn't matter what you're doing! So what was I supposed to do, huh? What do you do when you want something that everyone else wants too?! Don't go feeding me some bullshit about how I like you better this way or that way, all I ever wanted was you, plain and simple. And I am not going to fucking lose you just because you're too much of an ass to fight for your own life! Now come on! We're looking for Zabimaru!"
He grabbed Renji's hand, pulling him along, ignoring the redheads stammering, his stunned expression. They had to get through this, they would get through this. They had to keep Renji fighting until Urahara finished whatever it was he was going to do.
Renji stared at Ichigo's back as they walked, feeling hope piercing into him through the fog of pain and the mask that he'd put up as soon as he'd started this vain struggle to hold himself together. Ichigo was determined to save him. And if there was one thing Ichigo knew how to do, it was save people from the brink of death...
"Alright. Let's find Zabimaru." Renji agreed, holding Ichigo's hand tightly and walking beside him. "Together."
-//-
Urahara stood over the sleeping forms of the two shinigami, smiling a little as he looked at their linked hands between the beds. He took a syringe, moving to the IV drip currently connected to Renji's arm. He injected a red-ish pulsing liquid into the IV, stepping back with a nod.
"The rest is up to you two. Good luck."
-//-
So I suppose the next chapter will probably be the last one. It's a little hard to believe. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this.
They'd managed to stabilize Renji's condition, leaving her to her slumber while Urahara worked feverishly to cure her. Ichigo waited by her side, talking aimlessly about anything that came to mind, just so that she could hear his voice. Urahara had told him that she was lost, that talking to her might help her find her way back, and Ichigo was desperate for that to be true. He wanted Renji back, the old Renji, the old stupid, loud, i'll-punch-you-in-the-face-for-no-good-reason Renji. He missed him, more than he cared to admit. He wanted this whole ordeal to be over...
Urahara came in, sighing as he went to check the machines for what seemed to be the thousandth time, and his expression was grim as he observed the results.
"What's wrong?" Ichigo asked, looking exhausted and hollow.
"There's no improvement... Renji's struggling..."
Ichigo frowned, even deeper than usual. "What can I do? There's gotta be something."
Urahara looked thoughtful. "There might be something..."
-//-
Now Ichigo was laying on another small cot, looking across at Renji's pale face with an apprehensive expression. "You're sure this'll work?" he asked, looking dubious.
"Renji needs strong reiatsu to feed the part that is still a shinigami. Yours is perfect for the job since the two of you have similar reiatsu already."
"We do?"
"Yes, the two of you actually sync in battle almost seamlessly. It's remarkable to watch."
Ichigo hadn't known that before, it was just another thing to think about. When and if this "procedure" worked.
"I have an anesthetic here for you, Kurosaki-kun. Remember, when your reiatsu meshes, your minds might come together as well. It'll be disorienting, but do what you can." Ichigo nodded and Urahara pierced a small needle into his shoulder.
"Count back from ten."
"Ten, nine, eight, seve..."
-//-
It was cold, that was the first thing Ichigo noticed. When he raised his head he felt like his skin was numb from it. All around him there were plants, but the plants were frosted over, decaying in the cold, dying. The ground under him seemed unstable, fragile, Like, if he stepped wrong, it would crumble beneath him.
The fabric of Renji's soul....
He struggled to his feet, blinking and looking around. He was wearing his shinigami robes now, looking down at himself, feeling Zangetsu's weight on his back. He started walking, not really caring what direction he was going in. There wasn't an east or west here.
He caught a flash of red out of the corner of his eye, turning quickly. When he looked again he could see the tiniest hint of that red a short distance away, so he followed.
He came to some sort of clearing, with a frozen over pond and dry, brown grass where it was no doubt supposed to be green.
Renji waited there, but it was a side of Renji that Ichigo hadn't even realized how much he'd longed to see. It was Renji, male Renji, the real Renji, laying back on the grass with his eyes closed and his skin pale, looking almost at fragile as the world around him and at the same time like he was holding this entire world together.
"Renji!" He couldn't help the smile on his face, even though he knew that it wasn't exactly a happy reunion.
Renji opened his eyes, blinking and sitting up, turning to look at Ichigo, looking confused as he looked over at the other man.
"Renji!" Ichigo called again, rushing towards him, knocking the redhead back onto the ground as he wrapped his arms around him and crushed their lips together. "It's you. Really you!"
"Ichigo?" Renji pulled away, a little dizzy, looking up at Ichigo, just as confused by the sudden kiss as he was by the boy's presence. "What are you doin' here? How are you here?"
Ichigo face was flushed, though it was more from excitement at seeing Renji than any sort of embarrassment.
"Urahara is using my reiatsu to help you. I don't know how it works. But that's how I'm here I guess."
Renji sat up a bit again, watching the boy in his lap with eyes that were almost disbelieving.
"You sure you're not just a hallucination? It's been lonely here... With Zabimaru gone..."
His eyes were so dark and sad, Ichigo felt every protective instinct inside him welling up and demanding that he do something. He started by getting off of Renji's lap and standing, reaching out a hand. "I'm really here, Renji. I promise. Let's go look for Zabimaru, alright? You're probably just to thick to notice him when you were looking before."
Renji just shook his head, not rising up to the insult, just looking up at Ichigo with an uncharacteristically solemn expression. "It's no use. I've already looked. When I first got here I was freaked out, runnin' around everywhere, I didn't even realize that I was back to normal..." He slowly got to his feet, turning away from Ichigo so that he faced the frozen pond. "When I did notice, I realized that this is the last part of me that's still... me..." He sighed. "An' this part of me is dyin'..."
"Don't say shit like that! You're not dying!"
"Ain't I? Look around, Ichigo! This place is fallin' apart! I'm fallin' apart." He scoffed. "What d'you care anyway? You like that other me better anyway!"
"That's not true!" Ichigo yelled, getting up into Renji's face with glaring eyes. "I liked you! I always did! You just never noticed until all of this happened!" He poked a finger into Renji's chest, looking stern and pissed. "You talked about how I 'looked' at you? I've always looked at you like that! Who doesn't? You walk into the room and everyone's eyes are on you, it doesn't matter what you're doing! So what was I supposed to do, huh? What do you do when you want something that everyone else wants too?! Don't go feeding me some bullshit about how I like you better this way or that way, all I ever wanted was you, plain and simple. And I am not going to fucking lose you just because you're too much of an ass to fight for your own life! Now come on! We're looking for Zabimaru!"
He grabbed Renji's hand, pulling him along, ignoring the redheads stammering, his stunned expression. They had to get through this, they would get through this. They had to keep Renji fighting until Urahara finished whatever it was he was going to do.
Renji stared at Ichigo's back as they walked, feeling hope piercing into him through the fog of pain and the mask that he'd put up as soon as he'd started this vain struggle to hold himself together. Ichigo was determined to save him. And if there was one thing Ichigo knew how to do, it was save people from the brink of death...
"Alright. Let's find Zabimaru." Renji agreed, holding Ichigo's hand tightly and walking beside him. "Together."
-//-
Urahara stood over the sleeping forms of the two shinigami, smiling a little as he looked at their linked hands between the beds. He took a syringe, moving to the IV drip currently connected to Renji's arm. He injected a red-ish pulsing liquid into the IV, stepping back with a nod.
"The rest is up to you two. Good luck."
-//-
So I suppose the next chapter will probably be the last one. It's a little hard to believe. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this.