Fic: Time To Go
First, an apology. To anyone waiting for the next chapter of The Police - it will be up within the next two days. I'm very sorry, but things have been a bit non-helpful to getting the chapter written, but it's on the way now.
However, something that is now finished is a new fic within the SMOKE & LIGHTNING 'verse. So please read, and check out the author's note at the end.
Title: Time To Go
Authors: bloody_adorable and eviltwin
Fandoms: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jensen Ackles / Jared Padalecki.
Rating: Adult.
Wordcount: 5,646
Summary: AU. Some years after the events of BORN TO BE WILD, Jensen has finished his medical training and he and Jared are about to start another new chapter in their lives. But first they have to say a few goodbyes.
Disclaimer: None of the following is true in any way, and no profit is made from this work of fiction.
TIME TO GO
Jensen wakes late on a Friday morning, knowing that the following day his life will change. For today, though, he has a few hours in which he doesn't have to think about it. Their stuff is all packed up, save a couple of sets of clothes which they need for tonight and for travelling tomorrow, and they're sleeping in the guest bedroom at his mom's place, since Jeff and Stevie's spare space is all spoken for. Maya is being looked after by Phin until tomorrow, so they don't have her to worry about. They have a few hours to themselves and then it'll be time to get ready for their party tonight - a party to say goodbye and good luck before they take their flight to LA at midday tomorrow. Jensen has just fully completed his medical training and he's moving on to a job in a hospital on the coast, taking a position in the pediatrics ward. Jared finished work at Mickey's a few nights ago and already has some bits of work lined up for when they get there, ready to save for his own business.
They have plenty to look forward to.
But Jensen can't help but feel slightly melancholy as he turns and presses his mouth into the back of Jared's neck, wanting him awake. Jared moans quietly and Jensen realizes then that he already is.
"Hey," he says, as Jared rolls over to face him.
"Hi," Jared answers. "You all right?"
"Just thinking. This is it, huh? Last day in Texas."
Jared nods, and for a brief moment he looks like Jensen feels. They talked about the move for a couple of weeks before Jensen made a decision, to make sure they were both okay with it. They both have people they're going to miss terribly, but it's a huge opportunity and it took Jeff taking them both aside and pointing that out to them to make their minds up. Doesn't mean they'll miss their families any less.
"Don't cry on me now, Jen," Jared warns, bringing his hands up either side of Jensen's face. "We still got a party to get through. And we'll come back plenty."
"I know." Jensen sighs. "I know, it still sucks though. It just seems to have come around so fast. What time is it?"
Jared looks over his shoulder at the clock on the nightstand. "Just gone noon. Your mom let us sleep in kind of late." Then he frowns. "Pretty quiet, isn't it?"
"I guess they're all over at Mickey's, getting ready for tonight." Jensen reaches under the covers, moves his hand over Jared's thigh. "Maybe we should take advantage of the privacy."
It's nearing three by the time they hear someone coming back in. A minute later there's a knock at the bedroom door and Jensen calls out 'yeah?' just before it's opened up and his mom peeks around the edge.
"Honey, are you two getting up soon?"
"Yeah, mom. Sorry, I was just really tired." He nudges Jared in the ribs, since the other man has fallen asleep again, and his mom smiles at them both when Jared snorts loudly and comes to. "We'll get showered in a minute or two and get ready."
"Okay. Your sister could use a hand getting some things over to the bar. And Christian called for you while we were out. Didn't you hear it?"
"Guess not. Did he leave a message?"
"Just asked if you could call him back. I'll leave you both to get ready. We just have a couple more runs to make over to Mickey's and then everything's done. Do you two want anything to eat?"
Jared, now mostly conscious, shakes his head. "We can grab something ourselves. No problem."
"Okay." Donna steps back into the hallway and pulls the door shut behind her, fortunately just in time to miss Jared ducking his head back under the covers and attacking Jensen's chest and stomach with nipping kisses.
"Did you even hear her?" Jensen asks, lifting the sheets so he can see him.
"Yeah. We have a few minutes."
Jensen shoves him off though, rolls away so he can't get him back and then he's off the bed and standing. Jared just leans back against the pillows, hands behind his head, and watches him with a dirty smile on his face.
"I'm going to go shower. Can you call Chris and see what he wanted?" Jensen grabs his cellphone off the dresser and tosses it towards the bed, where Jared catches it in his right hand.
"Sure. Don't be too long, okay?"
"Are we on a time limit?"
"No, but I know what you're like."
Jensen just pokes his tongue out, even though it's childish, and then grabs his clothes before heading for their en-suite. He takes a long shower, the water wonderfully hot, and washes his hair. He isn't surprised when the shower door opens and Jared steps in with him, wraps cool arms around his waist.
"I called Chris," he says, kissing the side of Jensen's neck.
"Is he still coming?"
"Yeah, he's still coming. Lynn blew up at him while he was on the phone and told him there was no way he was missing it. She can't make it though. Chris said Johnny's sick and someone needs to stay home with him."
"Damn. Did they want me to-"
"They know what's wrong with him, nothing you can help with. He's just got a 24 hour bug. He'll be okay."
Jensen nods, then groans and lets his head droop forwards when Jared sucks at the skin of his shoulder. He should stop him, remind him that they promised his mom that they were getting up and ready, but any thought of that goes out of him when Jared's fingers trace a long line down the center of his back and tease at the crease of his ass. He feels his cock start to swell as Jared continues, can't help himself. Jared jerks him off, rutting against him until the water starts to run a little cooler. Jensen comes in his hand, feels Jared join him moments later. They relax completely, Jensen leaning against the sweaty tiles to hold himself upright. But then the water runs too cold to ignore and they're both aware they've spent too long in here. They get out, towel off, and dress for the party.
It's nothing big, they didn't want that, so jeans and t-shirts are fine. Jared doesn't bother with underwear, although Jensen does. When they emerge from their room and head into the kitchen, they find Kenzie sat at the breakfast bar waiting for them with a bored expression.
"Oh, there you are at last," she says. "You two need to learn to leave each other alone sometimes, you know."
Jared just ruffles her hair as he passes by her on the way to the refrigerator. She huffs at him, straightens it again. "Sure aren't going to miss you," she mutters, rolling her eyes as Jensen smiles at her.
"Yeah, you are," Jared tells her, taking a half-empty carton of juice out. "You'll be dreaming about me every night," he tells her. "Wishing all your boyfriends were just like me."
"Oh, you mean nightmares." Jared sticks a middle finger up behind her head and she makes a face at Jensen. "I know what he's doing, so just tell him to stop being such a dick, okay?"
"Young lady! Such language!" Then Jared puts down the juice and wraps his arms tightly around Kenzie so she can't get free. He kisses her cheek, wet and noisy. She's squealing at him to get off and that doesn't help at all, of course, and Jensen just laughs at them both. They only stop when Donna comes in and just looks at them like they're both three years old and need to grow up. Jared steps back and, before he can even say a thing, Kenzie jerks a thumb over her shoulder at him and says, "He started it."
"Whoever started it, it'd better not continue. Jensen, can you help your sister get the things in the hall into her car? And Jared, I'd appreciate it if you would come with me over to the bar while they do that. I'll drive."
Jensen glances at Jared, who looks just as surprised as he feels. He'd have expected, if his mom wanted to talk to one of them, that it would be him. "Uh... Sure. Do we need to take anything?"
"My car's already loaded up with things from Jeffrey's. Drive careful, Kenzie. We'll see you both there."
The bar's already looking busy when Donna pulls up outside and shuts off her engine. Jared stays where he is, since they didn't talk too much on the way over and he's sure that Donna wants to say what she has to say in the quiet privacy of the car rather than inside. He doesn't feel nervous about whatever this is, because he knows what's expected of him already.
"I'll look after him," he says, when it's been a few seconds of silence. "And I won't do anything stupid, if you're worried about that."
Donna smiles at him, shakes her head. "I know you won't. I'm not worried about you doing something idiotic, or Jensen doing something. I'm not really worried at all, Jared. I know you're both adults and you can damn well take care of yourself at your age. And I think you already know that if either of you do get in any trouble, then me and Tommy will be here for you as much as Jeff and Stevie will be. We love you both, very much."
"Well, thanks. I'm glad you made me a part of the family."
"Jared, you did that by yourself." She faces front again, stares out through the windscreen at the front doors of the bar. "You know my son better than any of us, I think. And you helped him figure a few things out about himself too. I don't think I've ever thanked you for that, in all these years."
"It wasn't exactly a chore," Jared says.
"Well, thank you anyway." She's quiet for a little while, so Jared thinks she's done and is surprised when she asks him something. "Do you think Jensen will be all right out there? Does it feel like he's ready for this?"
"Yes," he answers, without even needing to think. "Ever since he went to that conference with Dr. Lang.. In fact, ever since he first started studying medicine, I think this is what he wanted. And I think he's going to be amazing at it."
"I think so too."
"Is there something else?"
Donna looks at him again, then, and shakes her head with a smile. "No, I don't think so. I just wanted to tell you that, well, I am grateful for what you did. Right from the word go you've done nothing but help him, even if it hasn't always looked that way. And I think in turn you helped me, and Kenzie. And god knows how many others. I'm proud that I can consider you family."
Jared grins, doesn't fight the little swell of pride he feels himself. "I'm pretty pleased with how things turned out, too."
"Shall we get in there and help? The sooner we're all set up the sooner we can party, right?"
It's the middle of the evening and the bar is already packed out. Holly and Corey are both there, although they've been given a curfew of nine-thirty. That's when Jeffrey will take them both over to the babysitter's - a good friend of Stevie's - for the night so that the adults can get a bit more rowdy. Right now Holly is perched on Jared's shoulders, in a soft pink tutu and t-shirt, with fluffy wings and a tiara. Her blond hair is pulled back into cute little pigtails and she looks like butter wouldn't melt in her mouth. She has a cup of juice balanced on Jared's head, which she's holding with one hand, and she's sucking the contents out through a twisty straw.
"Hey, Jared? You got something..." Chris waves vaguely at his head, and Holly pokes her tongue out at him.
"Ha ha. You seen Jensen?"
"He's at the bar with Phin and Rock, having some kind of cocktail-building competition. I left 'em to it, because Jensen got kinda bitchy when I suggested that whiskey and wine was probably not going to end well."
"Tell me they're not actually drinking them too."
"As far as I know, they're trying everything out on Necro. He's agreed to be guinea pig and they're trying to see if they can actually get him drunk."
Jared rolls his eyes. "Right. Well.. I guess Rock knows what he's doing."
"Hi, Chris!" Holly says, leaning over from her precarious spot to put her arms out to him. Jared gives him a look like, do you mind?, and he opens his arms and catches her off Jared's shoulders, holding her against his hip.
"Hi," he says, once she's settled. "Are you annoying your big brother?"
"Mommy says I could never annoy Jared 'cause he's got..." She trails off, trying to remember what Stevie said.
"The patience of a saint," Jared supplies. "That and I love you, little squirt. Try not to bug Uncle Chris too much, okay? I'm gonna go rescue Jensen."
Jensen is at the bar, just like Chris had told him, and Necro is chugging back something that looks disturbingly blue. Jensen's watching him, his expression a mix of fascination and absolute awe. Jared nudges him and then sits down beside him, leaning in to kiss him.
"Hey," Jensen says. "Where's the limpet?"
"Stuck on Chris. She doesn't want to go home."
Phin smirks over at Jared, pours in a shot of something bright red to whatever he's concocting. "She's gonna have to. Adult entertainment is kinda X-rated, if you catch my drift."
"Did you get strippers?"
"Oh, you're gonna have to wait and see. It was all Stevie's idea anyhow."
"If I see a single naked tit tonight then we're leaving early. I don't want my mood killed."
"Jen'll get his cock out and make it all better if you ask real nice," Rock tells him, laughing as Jensen reaches for one of the shots he's lined up on the bar and downs it in one. "Aw, you gone all shy?"
Jensen points a finger at him. "You're sleeping with my mom, you're not allowed to talk about sex in front of me." He shudders. "It's creepy."
Rock just rolls his eyes in response and tells Jared to get his boyfriend away from the bar. Jared doesn't need asking twice, grabbing at Jensen's crotch as he slides off his barstool. "Now he's got me thinkin' about your dick, I think we need to visit the backroom for a few. No-one'll miss us."
Jensen quietly moves his hand, squeezes his fingers. "Maybe not, but the sex can still wait 'til we get home. In the meantime, we're dancing. Jeff and Stevie are putting us to shame with their moves, and it's meant to be our party."
They make their way slowly through the crowded dance-floor - seriously, there are people everywhere and Jared's not even that sure he knows them all - and find a spot near the stage. There's a local band up there making a hell of a lot of noise, covering classic rock hits in some style that Jensen can't really name. They're good though, and more than enthusiastic, and people seem to be enjoying it. Another band, one Rock paid a lot more money for, are taking over from them in an hour, so at least it can only get better. Ignoring the pace of the music, Jared circles his arms around Jensen and pulls him in tight, tight enough that Jensen can feel the hard line of Jared's belt buckle against his stomach.
"We're not making out to this," he says, gripping Jared's shirt in both hands. "There're still children present."
"Mm, they might as well learn a few things early," Jared tells him, moving Jensen's head back with a hand in his hair. He kisses him gently and they start to move in an understated version of dancing. Jensen thinks it feels kind of like a honeymoon dance, the first steps on the floor after a wedding. He keeps the thought to himself, though, sure that Jared will only mock him if he says it out loud. He just relaxes in Jared's hold and rests his head on the taller man's shoulder, feeling completely comfortable. Which is about when they hear Jensen's sister yelling a warning just before Corey runs into them both. "Holy crap, you get rid of one and the other takes her place," Jared mutters, only laughing at the look Jensen gives him as he ducks down and lifts the little boy up in his arms. Corey hugs him hard and Jensen feels a tug in his stomach that he is starting to get used to.
At work it's the same. He spends most of his day looking after kids and some of them, the ones that are there for much longer than it takes to fix a broken leg or stitch a cut, can get very attached to him. He hasn't really mentioned it to Jared, although he's told his mom and Stevie both that in some cases it's really hard to say goodbye. He hugs Corey back and tries not to think about how great it would be to have this kind of responsibility to share with his lover.
"Hey, kiddo, you enjoying the party?"
Corey makes a noise that sounds positive. He's sleepy, Jensen can tell. Kenzie's with them now, smiling apologetically.
"Sorry," she says. "He kind of got away from me. You want me to take him again?"
"Ah, we're good. The kids are only here for another hour. You brought a date, right?"
Kenzie blushes, shakes her head. "Huh-uh. We broke up last week." She eyes Jensen, sighs when she realizes he already knew that. "It's not nice to tease, you know."
"I'm sorry. There are plenty of nice young men around here. You should go find one."
Jared laughs at the look on Kenzie's face and he steps back from Jensen. "C'mon, beautiful. You can dance with me while Jensen plays nanny again. You'd think he'd have enough of kids from work, but apparently-" He's cut off as Kenzie grabs him by the arm and pulls him away, before he says something to irritate Jensen even more.
Left alone with Jared's little brother - his little brother too, he thinks - Jensen moves away from the dancers and finds a spot at an empty table to sit down. He looks around the room at the huge amount of people and thinks that if he hadn't met Jared, would anyone have cared to do this? Would this many people have been bothered by the fact that he was heading to a dream job in another state, another world as far as he was concerned, and starting a career that would last his whole life? He doesn't think so. He stops himself; he doesn't want to get all contemplative and depressed tonight. He'll have plenty of time to do that while they're on the plane tomorrow, after all. He can feel Corey's breath against his neck and realizes that the little boy has fallen asleep on him. How he can with the noise, Jensen doesn't know. It's a skill that he envies, after failing to sleep through anything at the hospital.
Jensen stays there for a while, catching sight of Jared now and again as he has a dance with pretty much every female in the room, and Corey gets warmer and heavier. But he doesn't let go of him. Just lets him sleep on, undisturbed. It's just past nine when Stevie comes over to him and takes the seat opposite.
"He suits you," she says, smiling at Corey. She looks like she's been having a lot of fun, her skin shiny with perspiration and flushed. "You ever think about-"
"Yeah. More and more, I think about it. I just... I don't know how to bring it up with Jared." Jensen makes a face. "You know what he's like."
"You'd make a great father," Stevie tells him. "And yes, I know what Jared's like. But so do you. That's why I'm surprised you don't just tell him."
Jensen shrugs one shoulder. She's right, he knows. Jared would listen. He'd understand. Jensen just isn't sure if he'd agree and he doesn't want to go through it if he won't. Stevie seems to know what he's thinking and she leans across the table and pats his arm.
"I know, hon. I know. Maybe L.A. will be what you both need."
"I'm kind of counting on it."
"Anyway, I came over to say that Jeff's going to take the kids to the babysitter's now. Holly's looking pretty tired out herself. And the entertainment is on its way."
"Okay." Jensen nudges Corey very gently, letting him wake up in his own time. He gives him a tight hug, even though he knows he'll see him again tomorrow, and tells him good night. Stevie takes him and he watches her all the way to the door, where Jeffrey is waiting with Holly resting on his hip. They're just leaving when Jared appears, sits himself down next to Jensen.
"You all right?" he asks.
"Yeah, I'm good."
"Really? 'Cause you look like someone stole your favorite toy. Kenzie's words, not mine."
Jensen sits up properly, gets to his feet. "I'm fine," he says.
"You want to talk about it?"
"Not here I don't." He wants to get away, go outside for some air for a minute, but as he tries to get past Jared he is pulled down into the other man's lap and held there. Jared kisses his ear, his jaw, his mouth. He doesn't try to escape, just settles into Jared's hold. "We'll break the chair," he mumbles.
"Mm, maybe... I doubt that Rock'll make us pay damages. So come on. Tell me what's up."
"You won't take it seriously."
Jared eyes him. "I'm hurt. Tell me."
"I want kids," Jensen says, deciding he might as well get straight to the point. He buries his face in Jared's shirt, sighing heavily. "Before you even say it, I know. I'm a doctor, and I know. I just, I want a family with you." Jared stays quiet and Jensen listens to him breathe for a few moments until he can't bear it. "Say something."
"I don't know what I'm meant to say to that. If you're asking do I want that too then, truthfully? I don't know. And I'm sorry for that, because I know it's not what you want to hear."
Jensen nods, relaxes in Jared's arms. "It's okay. That's what I figured anyway."
Jared sighs. "Can we just get all this other stuff out of the way first? Let's get into our own place in L.A., let's get settled into our jobs and see if I can set some kind of business up and running. And then maybe we can talk to somebody about it."
Looking up at Jared in surprise, Jensen places a hand against the man's chest. "You're serious?"
Jared smiles, bumps his head against the younger man's gently. "Believe it or not, sometimes I can be. And I'm not saying yes just now, but I'm not saying no either. You might feel ready for it, but.. I don't know, maybe it'll just take me a little longer."
The confession surprises him even more. He's always thought of Jared as completely sure of everything and the fact that he has doubts about whether he could be a parent is.. Well. It's eye-opening. They share another quiet kiss when the music suddenly dies out and Rock's voice comes through the amps instead.
"Okay, we've got a break before the next band and I've just been informed that the party is now strictly adults only, so for our boys.. Here's a little present from us all."
Jensen's eyes go wide and Jared starts laughing as the music starts up, this time from the jukebox. It's Hot Stuff and, as the first few bars sound out, the stage is filled with a dozen very well-built and well-oiled men, all dressed in tiny silver shorts and feather boas.
"Holy crap. Stevie hired go-go boys."
Jared gets Jensen up and before he can be stopped he's heading for the stage, losing his shirt on the way. Jensen can feel himself blushing, although everyone else is whistling loudly as Jared takes to the stage with the dancers and makes a brave attempt at joining in their routine.
"He ain't half bad," says a voice by his shoulder.
"Make it stop," Jensen whines, as Jared grabs one of the other boys' boas and pulls him closer, sandwiching himself between two of them as he bumps and grinds his way through the song, lacking in anything like co-ordination.
"Sorry, man." Chris pats his shoulder sympathetically. "Looks like Jay's found his new vocation."
"Don't even joke about that kind of thing."
Chris just laughs and Jensen rolls his eyes as Jared is finally, mercifully, encouraged to leave the dancers alone. "How you holding up?" Chris asks, as Jared heads straight for the bar.
"Pretty good. Don't ask me that tomorrow, 'cause I'll probably be an absolute wreck."
"Fair enough. I just wondered, since you looked kind of serious a few minutes ago. Both of you."
"Yeah, well. I kind of told Jared about my big gay family fantasy. You know. Me, him, the dog, and two-point-four kids, happily ever after. I don't think he's grown up enough to know if he wants that yet. Or maybe he's too grown up."
"You can always borrow Johnny for a week. I'm sure me and Lynn could cope with the time off, knowing he was in safe hands."
Jensen sighs. "Not really what I meant, Chris."
"I know. Just trying to be helpful."
"I appreciate it." Jensen hugs Chris tightly then. "I'm really gonna miss you."
"Hey, hey! Save it for tomorrow, jerk. I'm not going to embarrass myself at such an excellent party. I'll do it at the airport, where nobody knows me."
"Your beers, gentlemen." Jared's there suddenly, handing them both a bottle, and he slings his arm around Jensen's shoulder. "Those dancing boys are hot."
"It's not gonna work tonight, Jay," Jensen tells him. "Give it up." Jared huffs, but stays quiet. On stage, the boys are all lined up in a row, grinding against one another and waving their boas above their heads. Jensen's not watching them any more, though. His gaze is fixed on Jared, his hand pressed to naked tattooed skin. "Jay?"
"Yeah?" Jared's distracted. He is still watching the stage, and so is Chris.
Jensen pats the skin under his hand and moves out of Jared's hold. "Nothing. I love you."
"Love you too." His gaze finally moves to Jensen. "You going somewhere?"
"Yeah. But I'll be back real soon. Keep Chris company." He leans in and kisses the other man real quick, then heads away. He really does need some air now, and he needs some quiet too.
He thinks Stevie might be offended if she sees him leaving, so he walks all the way to the back wall of the bar and follows it around to the front door, opening it just enough to slip through. He now realizes how stale the air inside the bar really is. He takes a deep breath of the fresh air outside and sighs. The parking lot is pretty damn full, but most of the spaces have motorcycles parked in them, two at a time, so Jensen has plenty of room to sit down on the cement curbs that mark out the spaces. He settles down on one of the markers, his knees curled into his chest, tattooed arms wrapped around them.
Looking out at the traffic, Jensen loses himself in thought, until he hears a set of boot heels shuffling on the parking lot pavement. Turning and looking up, Jensen expects to see Jared or Chris, but instead finds Jeffrey standing there.
"You okay, kid?"
Jensen smiles and nods. "Yeah," he agrees. "Just needed some fresh air. The kids at the babysitters?"
Grunting, Jeff moves to sit on the marker with Jensen. "Yeah," he agrees, swearing at his knees. They don't bend like they used to and he suddenly feels old. "They were tuckered out. Went right to bed."
"Good," he nods.
Jeffrey watches as Jensen turns back toward the traffic, watching it speed by. He frowns and does the same, wishing he knew just how to make the kid feel better. "You dreading tomorrow as much as I am?"
Jensen doesn't really answer. He sort of laughs and somewhat nods, shrugging with one shoulder at the same time.
Nodding in agreement, Jeffrey adds in his own soft chuckle. "Yeah," he sighs. "I know I'm not really great with the touchy-feely girly talk, but..."
Jensen straightens enough to look over at him. "You don't have to, Jeff."
"I know," he agrees, with an earnest nod. "But I want you to know a few things."
Jensen just lets him talk. He suddenly really realizes how the move to LA isn't just affecting him and Jared.
"Before you, Jay was a tough call," he admits. "I had more headaches over that kid. I love him so fucking much. More than he'll ever know. But -- well, you know. Saying he's a handful is an understatement."
Jensen laughs softly, his eyes sparkling in the low, amber light of the parking lot.
"You were good for him, though," Jeff continues. "You got through to him when I couldn't. Because of you, he's turned out to be a pretty damn good kid."
"He was a damn good kid before that," Jensen assures him. "We just brought out the best in each other, I think."
Jeff nods, staring off into space. "He's always going to be a tough case, I think," he says. "But he loves you like...well, like crazy. He'll always need your help. He picked up some pretty shitty habits from me." He turned and motioned to the bar. "Like all of this, for instance."
Shaking his head, Jensen reaches out and sets a hand on Jeffrey's shoulder. "Jeff," he says, smiling. "I fell in love with him because of how you raised him. Because of who, and what he is. No relationship is perfect, I know that. But I think we've worked really hard to get where we are."
"You have," he agrees. "I've never seen so much ambition in that kid's eyes as I do now. I don't know where any of us would be without you."
His smile is crooked, his eyes welling up with tears. "Well, the feeling's mutual."
Jeff reaches out, his fingers curling around the back of Jensen's neck, pulling him in for an embrace. He feels the young man's arm around his shoulders, holding on tightly. "Gonna miss you, kid," he says softly into Jensen's ear.
"I'm gonna miss you too," Jensen whispers.
"You're not making out with my significant other, are you, Jeffrey Dean?"
Jeff and Jensen let go of each other, looking up to see Jared nearing them. Laughing, Jeffrey holds out his hands to his son, silently asking for assistance.
"Old fart," Jared laughs. "Can't get up on your own, can you?"
"Just fucking help me, asshole," Jeff smiles.
Jared takes hold of both of Jeff's hands and tugs hard, pulling him up from the lot marker. He's still smiling when Jeff lets go of his hands, instead reaching up and patting Jared's face. Without a word, Jeff pulls Jared in for a hug, and then is gone in an instant, as if he has already used up his words and can't find any more to bestow upon Jared.
Smile gone, Jared watches Jeff head back towards the bar, his shoulders hunched as he walks. Jared winces and sits down next to Jensen. "Did it just get really frickin' serious out here, or what?"
Jensen grumbles and leans against Jared's warm body. "This is torture, you know," he complains.
"The party?"
"Yes," he agrees adamantly. "It's drawing it all out. I just want to get it over with."
Even though he understands what Jensen's saying, he can't resist teasing him a little. "Just like one big band aid. Rip it off and get all the hurt done at once?"
"Yes," he agrees, then heaves a heavy sigh. "Can we go home?"
Tonguing his teeth, Jared thinks for a moment. "This is really bothering you?"
He doesn't reply with words, just nodding his head.
Jared returns the nod. "Okay," he agrees. "Let me go tell Jeff, and we'll head home."
Hope sparkles in Jensen's greenish eyes as he watches Jared stand. "Really?"
"Yeah," he shrugs. "It'd be better if they weren't around when we have our last bout of mind-blowing leaving-Texas sex."
Instantly, Jensen's sadness fades and he gets up, smiles at Jared. "I love you," he chuckles.
It's going to hurt to leave the family, but Jensen knows that, with Jared by his side, they can conquer pretty much anything. Jeffrey was right. They've been good for each other and Jensen doesn't see that stopping any time soon.
Jared pulls Jensen in with an arm around his waist and kisses him quickly. "I love you too. Five minutes, okay? We can do the proper goodbyes tomorrow."
"Okay." Jensen nods and watches him go. He knows it'll be okay, but tomorrow doesn't seem far away enough.
end
Okay.
Here's some news.
COMING MARCH 2010
:D
However, something that is now finished is a new fic within the SMOKE & LIGHTNING 'verse. So please read, and check out the author's note at the end.
Title: Time To Go
Authors: bloody_adorable and eviltwin
Fandoms: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jensen Ackles / Jared Padalecki.
Rating: Adult.
Wordcount: 5,646
Summary: AU. Some years after the events of BORN TO BE WILD, Jensen has finished his medical training and he and Jared are about to start another new chapter in their lives. But first they have to say a few goodbyes.
Disclaimer: None of the following is true in any way, and no profit is made from this work of fiction.
TIME TO GO
Jensen wakes late on a Friday morning, knowing that the following day his life will change. For today, though, he has a few hours in which he doesn't have to think about it. Their stuff is all packed up, save a couple of sets of clothes which they need for tonight and for travelling tomorrow, and they're sleeping in the guest bedroom at his mom's place, since Jeff and Stevie's spare space is all spoken for. Maya is being looked after by Phin until tomorrow, so they don't have her to worry about. They have a few hours to themselves and then it'll be time to get ready for their party tonight - a party to say goodbye and good luck before they take their flight to LA at midday tomorrow. Jensen has just fully completed his medical training and he's moving on to a job in a hospital on the coast, taking a position in the pediatrics ward. Jared finished work at Mickey's a few nights ago and already has some bits of work lined up for when they get there, ready to save for his own business.
They have plenty to look forward to.
But Jensen can't help but feel slightly melancholy as he turns and presses his mouth into the back of Jared's neck, wanting him awake. Jared moans quietly and Jensen realizes then that he already is.
"Hey," he says, as Jared rolls over to face him.
"Hi," Jared answers. "You all right?"
"Just thinking. This is it, huh? Last day in Texas."
Jared nods, and for a brief moment he looks like Jensen feels. They talked about the move for a couple of weeks before Jensen made a decision, to make sure they were both okay with it. They both have people they're going to miss terribly, but it's a huge opportunity and it took Jeff taking them both aside and pointing that out to them to make their minds up. Doesn't mean they'll miss their families any less.
"Don't cry on me now, Jen," Jared warns, bringing his hands up either side of Jensen's face. "We still got a party to get through. And we'll come back plenty."
"I know." Jensen sighs. "I know, it still sucks though. It just seems to have come around so fast. What time is it?"
Jared looks over his shoulder at the clock on the nightstand. "Just gone noon. Your mom let us sleep in kind of late." Then he frowns. "Pretty quiet, isn't it?"
"I guess they're all over at Mickey's, getting ready for tonight." Jensen reaches under the covers, moves his hand over Jared's thigh. "Maybe we should take advantage of the privacy."
It's nearing three by the time they hear someone coming back in. A minute later there's a knock at the bedroom door and Jensen calls out 'yeah?' just before it's opened up and his mom peeks around the edge.
"Honey, are you two getting up soon?"
"Yeah, mom. Sorry, I was just really tired." He nudges Jared in the ribs, since the other man has fallen asleep again, and his mom smiles at them both when Jared snorts loudly and comes to. "We'll get showered in a minute or two and get ready."
"Okay. Your sister could use a hand getting some things over to the bar. And Christian called for you while we were out. Didn't you hear it?"
"Guess not. Did he leave a message?"
"Just asked if you could call him back. I'll leave you both to get ready. We just have a couple more runs to make over to Mickey's and then everything's done. Do you two want anything to eat?"
Jared, now mostly conscious, shakes his head. "We can grab something ourselves. No problem."
"Okay." Donna steps back into the hallway and pulls the door shut behind her, fortunately just in time to miss Jared ducking his head back under the covers and attacking Jensen's chest and stomach with nipping kisses.
"Did you even hear her?" Jensen asks, lifting the sheets so he can see him.
"Yeah. We have a few minutes."
Jensen shoves him off though, rolls away so he can't get him back and then he's off the bed and standing. Jared just leans back against the pillows, hands behind his head, and watches him with a dirty smile on his face.
"I'm going to go shower. Can you call Chris and see what he wanted?" Jensen grabs his cellphone off the dresser and tosses it towards the bed, where Jared catches it in his right hand.
"Sure. Don't be too long, okay?"
"Are we on a time limit?"
"No, but I know what you're like."
Jensen just pokes his tongue out, even though it's childish, and then grabs his clothes before heading for their en-suite. He takes a long shower, the water wonderfully hot, and washes his hair. He isn't surprised when the shower door opens and Jared steps in with him, wraps cool arms around his waist.
"I called Chris," he says, kissing the side of Jensen's neck.
"Is he still coming?"
"Yeah, he's still coming. Lynn blew up at him while he was on the phone and told him there was no way he was missing it. She can't make it though. Chris said Johnny's sick and someone needs to stay home with him."
"Damn. Did they want me to-"
"They know what's wrong with him, nothing you can help with. He's just got a 24 hour bug. He'll be okay."
Jensen nods, then groans and lets his head droop forwards when Jared sucks at the skin of his shoulder. He should stop him, remind him that they promised his mom that they were getting up and ready, but any thought of that goes out of him when Jared's fingers trace a long line down the center of his back and tease at the crease of his ass. He feels his cock start to swell as Jared continues, can't help himself. Jared jerks him off, rutting against him until the water starts to run a little cooler. Jensen comes in his hand, feels Jared join him moments later. They relax completely, Jensen leaning against the sweaty tiles to hold himself upright. But then the water runs too cold to ignore and they're both aware they've spent too long in here. They get out, towel off, and dress for the party.
It's nothing big, they didn't want that, so jeans and t-shirts are fine. Jared doesn't bother with underwear, although Jensen does. When they emerge from their room and head into the kitchen, they find Kenzie sat at the breakfast bar waiting for them with a bored expression.
"Oh, there you are at last," she says. "You two need to learn to leave each other alone sometimes, you know."
Jared just ruffles her hair as he passes by her on the way to the refrigerator. She huffs at him, straightens it again. "Sure aren't going to miss you," she mutters, rolling her eyes as Jensen smiles at her.
"Yeah, you are," Jared tells her, taking a half-empty carton of juice out. "You'll be dreaming about me every night," he tells her. "Wishing all your boyfriends were just like me."
"Oh, you mean nightmares." Jared sticks a middle finger up behind her head and she makes a face at Jensen. "I know what he's doing, so just tell him to stop being such a dick, okay?"
"Young lady! Such language!" Then Jared puts down the juice and wraps his arms tightly around Kenzie so she can't get free. He kisses her cheek, wet and noisy. She's squealing at him to get off and that doesn't help at all, of course, and Jensen just laughs at them both. They only stop when Donna comes in and just looks at them like they're both three years old and need to grow up. Jared steps back and, before he can even say a thing, Kenzie jerks a thumb over her shoulder at him and says, "He started it."
"Whoever started it, it'd better not continue. Jensen, can you help your sister get the things in the hall into her car? And Jared, I'd appreciate it if you would come with me over to the bar while they do that. I'll drive."
Jensen glances at Jared, who looks just as surprised as he feels. He'd have expected, if his mom wanted to talk to one of them, that it would be him. "Uh... Sure. Do we need to take anything?"
"My car's already loaded up with things from Jeffrey's. Drive careful, Kenzie. We'll see you both there."
The bar's already looking busy when Donna pulls up outside and shuts off her engine. Jared stays where he is, since they didn't talk too much on the way over and he's sure that Donna wants to say what she has to say in the quiet privacy of the car rather than inside. He doesn't feel nervous about whatever this is, because he knows what's expected of him already.
"I'll look after him," he says, when it's been a few seconds of silence. "And I won't do anything stupid, if you're worried about that."
Donna smiles at him, shakes her head. "I know you won't. I'm not worried about you doing something idiotic, or Jensen doing something. I'm not really worried at all, Jared. I know you're both adults and you can damn well take care of yourself at your age. And I think you already know that if either of you do get in any trouble, then me and Tommy will be here for you as much as Jeff and Stevie will be. We love you both, very much."
"Well, thanks. I'm glad you made me a part of the family."
"Jared, you did that by yourself." She faces front again, stares out through the windscreen at the front doors of the bar. "You know my son better than any of us, I think. And you helped him figure a few things out about himself too. I don't think I've ever thanked you for that, in all these years."
"It wasn't exactly a chore," Jared says.
"Well, thank you anyway." She's quiet for a little while, so Jared thinks she's done and is surprised when she asks him something. "Do you think Jensen will be all right out there? Does it feel like he's ready for this?"
"Yes," he answers, without even needing to think. "Ever since he went to that conference with Dr. Lang.. In fact, ever since he first started studying medicine, I think this is what he wanted. And I think he's going to be amazing at it."
"I think so too."
"Is there something else?"
Donna looks at him again, then, and shakes her head with a smile. "No, I don't think so. I just wanted to tell you that, well, I am grateful for what you did. Right from the word go you've done nothing but help him, even if it hasn't always looked that way. And I think in turn you helped me, and Kenzie. And god knows how many others. I'm proud that I can consider you family."
Jared grins, doesn't fight the little swell of pride he feels himself. "I'm pretty pleased with how things turned out, too."
"Shall we get in there and help? The sooner we're all set up the sooner we can party, right?"
It's the middle of the evening and the bar is already packed out. Holly and Corey are both there, although they've been given a curfew of nine-thirty. That's when Jeffrey will take them both over to the babysitter's - a good friend of Stevie's - for the night so that the adults can get a bit more rowdy. Right now Holly is perched on Jared's shoulders, in a soft pink tutu and t-shirt, with fluffy wings and a tiara. Her blond hair is pulled back into cute little pigtails and she looks like butter wouldn't melt in her mouth. She has a cup of juice balanced on Jared's head, which she's holding with one hand, and she's sucking the contents out through a twisty straw.
"Hey, Jared? You got something..." Chris waves vaguely at his head, and Holly pokes her tongue out at him.
"Ha ha. You seen Jensen?"
"He's at the bar with Phin and Rock, having some kind of cocktail-building competition. I left 'em to it, because Jensen got kinda bitchy when I suggested that whiskey and wine was probably not going to end well."
"Tell me they're not actually drinking them too."
"As far as I know, they're trying everything out on Necro. He's agreed to be guinea pig and they're trying to see if they can actually get him drunk."
Jared rolls his eyes. "Right. Well.. I guess Rock knows what he's doing."
"Hi, Chris!" Holly says, leaning over from her precarious spot to put her arms out to him. Jared gives him a look like, do you mind?, and he opens his arms and catches her off Jared's shoulders, holding her against his hip.
"Hi," he says, once she's settled. "Are you annoying your big brother?"
"Mommy says I could never annoy Jared 'cause he's got..." She trails off, trying to remember what Stevie said.
"The patience of a saint," Jared supplies. "That and I love you, little squirt. Try not to bug Uncle Chris too much, okay? I'm gonna go rescue Jensen."
Jensen is at the bar, just like Chris had told him, and Necro is chugging back something that looks disturbingly blue. Jensen's watching him, his expression a mix of fascination and absolute awe. Jared nudges him and then sits down beside him, leaning in to kiss him.
"Hey," Jensen says. "Where's the limpet?"
"Stuck on Chris. She doesn't want to go home."
Phin smirks over at Jared, pours in a shot of something bright red to whatever he's concocting. "She's gonna have to. Adult entertainment is kinda X-rated, if you catch my drift."
"Did you get strippers?"
"Oh, you're gonna have to wait and see. It was all Stevie's idea anyhow."
"If I see a single naked tit tonight then we're leaving early. I don't want my mood killed."
"Jen'll get his cock out and make it all better if you ask real nice," Rock tells him, laughing as Jensen reaches for one of the shots he's lined up on the bar and downs it in one. "Aw, you gone all shy?"
Jensen points a finger at him. "You're sleeping with my mom, you're not allowed to talk about sex in front of me." He shudders. "It's creepy."
Rock just rolls his eyes in response and tells Jared to get his boyfriend away from the bar. Jared doesn't need asking twice, grabbing at Jensen's crotch as he slides off his barstool. "Now he's got me thinkin' about your dick, I think we need to visit the backroom for a few. No-one'll miss us."
Jensen quietly moves his hand, squeezes his fingers. "Maybe not, but the sex can still wait 'til we get home. In the meantime, we're dancing. Jeff and Stevie are putting us to shame with their moves, and it's meant to be our party."
They make their way slowly through the crowded dance-floor - seriously, there are people everywhere and Jared's not even that sure he knows them all - and find a spot near the stage. There's a local band up there making a hell of a lot of noise, covering classic rock hits in some style that Jensen can't really name. They're good though, and more than enthusiastic, and people seem to be enjoying it. Another band, one Rock paid a lot more money for, are taking over from them in an hour, so at least it can only get better. Ignoring the pace of the music, Jared circles his arms around Jensen and pulls him in tight, tight enough that Jensen can feel the hard line of Jared's belt buckle against his stomach.
"We're not making out to this," he says, gripping Jared's shirt in both hands. "There're still children present."
"Mm, they might as well learn a few things early," Jared tells him, moving Jensen's head back with a hand in his hair. He kisses him gently and they start to move in an understated version of dancing. Jensen thinks it feels kind of like a honeymoon dance, the first steps on the floor after a wedding. He keeps the thought to himself, though, sure that Jared will only mock him if he says it out loud. He just relaxes in Jared's hold and rests his head on the taller man's shoulder, feeling completely comfortable. Which is about when they hear Jensen's sister yelling a warning just before Corey runs into them both. "Holy crap, you get rid of one and the other takes her place," Jared mutters, only laughing at the look Jensen gives him as he ducks down and lifts the little boy up in his arms. Corey hugs him hard and Jensen feels a tug in his stomach that he is starting to get used to.
At work it's the same. He spends most of his day looking after kids and some of them, the ones that are there for much longer than it takes to fix a broken leg or stitch a cut, can get very attached to him. He hasn't really mentioned it to Jared, although he's told his mom and Stevie both that in some cases it's really hard to say goodbye. He hugs Corey back and tries not to think about how great it would be to have this kind of responsibility to share with his lover.
"Hey, kiddo, you enjoying the party?"
Corey makes a noise that sounds positive. He's sleepy, Jensen can tell. Kenzie's with them now, smiling apologetically.
"Sorry," she says. "He kind of got away from me. You want me to take him again?"
"Ah, we're good. The kids are only here for another hour. You brought a date, right?"
Kenzie blushes, shakes her head. "Huh-uh. We broke up last week." She eyes Jensen, sighs when she realizes he already knew that. "It's not nice to tease, you know."
"I'm sorry. There are plenty of nice young men around here. You should go find one."
Jared laughs at the look on Kenzie's face and he steps back from Jensen. "C'mon, beautiful. You can dance with me while Jensen plays nanny again. You'd think he'd have enough of kids from work, but apparently-" He's cut off as Kenzie grabs him by the arm and pulls him away, before he says something to irritate Jensen even more.
Left alone with Jared's little brother - his little brother too, he thinks - Jensen moves away from the dancers and finds a spot at an empty table to sit down. He looks around the room at the huge amount of people and thinks that if he hadn't met Jared, would anyone have cared to do this? Would this many people have been bothered by the fact that he was heading to a dream job in another state, another world as far as he was concerned, and starting a career that would last his whole life? He doesn't think so. He stops himself; he doesn't want to get all contemplative and depressed tonight. He'll have plenty of time to do that while they're on the plane tomorrow, after all. He can feel Corey's breath against his neck and realizes that the little boy has fallen asleep on him. How he can with the noise, Jensen doesn't know. It's a skill that he envies, after failing to sleep through anything at the hospital.
Jensen stays there for a while, catching sight of Jared now and again as he has a dance with pretty much every female in the room, and Corey gets warmer and heavier. But he doesn't let go of him. Just lets him sleep on, undisturbed. It's just past nine when Stevie comes over to him and takes the seat opposite.
"He suits you," she says, smiling at Corey. She looks like she's been having a lot of fun, her skin shiny with perspiration and flushed. "You ever think about-"
"Yeah. More and more, I think about it. I just... I don't know how to bring it up with Jared." Jensen makes a face. "You know what he's like."
"You'd make a great father," Stevie tells him. "And yes, I know what Jared's like. But so do you. That's why I'm surprised you don't just tell him."
Jensen shrugs one shoulder. She's right, he knows. Jared would listen. He'd understand. Jensen just isn't sure if he'd agree and he doesn't want to go through it if he won't. Stevie seems to know what he's thinking and she leans across the table and pats his arm.
"I know, hon. I know. Maybe L.A. will be what you both need."
"I'm kind of counting on it."
"Anyway, I came over to say that Jeff's going to take the kids to the babysitter's now. Holly's looking pretty tired out herself. And the entertainment is on its way."
"Okay." Jensen nudges Corey very gently, letting him wake up in his own time. He gives him a tight hug, even though he knows he'll see him again tomorrow, and tells him good night. Stevie takes him and he watches her all the way to the door, where Jeffrey is waiting with Holly resting on his hip. They're just leaving when Jared appears, sits himself down next to Jensen.
"You all right?" he asks.
"Yeah, I'm good."
"Really? 'Cause you look like someone stole your favorite toy. Kenzie's words, not mine."
Jensen sits up properly, gets to his feet. "I'm fine," he says.
"You want to talk about it?"
"Not here I don't." He wants to get away, go outside for some air for a minute, but as he tries to get past Jared he is pulled down into the other man's lap and held there. Jared kisses his ear, his jaw, his mouth. He doesn't try to escape, just settles into Jared's hold. "We'll break the chair," he mumbles.
"Mm, maybe... I doubt that Rock'll make us pay damages. So come on. Tell me what's up."
"You won't take it seriously."
Jared eyes him. "I'm hurt. Tell me."
"I want kids," Jensen says, deciding he might as well get straight to the point. He buries his face in Jared's shirt, sighing heavily. "Before you even say it, I know. I'm a doctor, and I know. I just, I want a family with you." Jared stays quiet and Jensen listens to him breathe for a few moments until he can't bear it. "Say something."
"I don't know what I'm meant to say to that. If you're asking do I want that too then, truthfully? I don't know. And I'm sorry for that, because I know it's not what you want to hear."
Jensen nods, relaxes in Jared's arms. "It's okay. That's what I figured anyway."
Jared sighs. "Can we just get all this other stuff out of the way first? Let's get into our own place in L.A., let's get settled into our jobs and see if I can set some kind of business up and running. And then maybe we can talk to somebody about it."
Looking up at Jared in surprise, Jensen places a hand against the man's chest. "You're serious?"
Jared smiles, bumps his head against the younger man's gently. "Believe it or not, sometimes I can be. And I'm not saying yes just now, but I'm not saying no either. You might feel ready for it, but.. I don't know, maybe it'll just take me a little longer."
The confession surprises him even more. He's always thought of Jared as completely sure of everything and the fact that he has doubts about whether he could be a parent is.. Well. It's eye-opening. They share another quiet kiss when the music suddenly dies out and Rock's voice comes through the amps instead.
"Okay, we've got a break before the next band and I've just been informed that the party is now strictly adults only, so for our boys.. Here's a little present from us all."
Jensen's eyes go wide and Jared starts laughing as the music starts up, this time from the jukebox. It's Hot Stuff and, as the first few bars sound out, the stage is filled with a dozen very well-built and well-oiled men, all dressed in tiny silver shorts and feather boas.
"Holy crap. Stevie hired go-go boys."
Jared gets Jensen up and before he can be stopped he's heading for the stage, losing his shirt on the way. Jensen can feel himself blushing, although everyone else is whistling loudly as Jared takes to the stage with the dancers and makes a brave attempt at joining in their routine.
"He ain't half bad," says a voice by his shoulder.
"Make it stop," Jensen whines, as Jared grabs one of the other boys' boas and pulls him closer, sandwiching himself between two of them as he bumps and grinds his way through the song, lacking in anything like co-ordination.
"Sorry, man." Chris pats his shoulder sympathetically. "Looks like Jay's found his new vocation."
"Don't even joke about that kind of thing."
Chris just laughs and Jensen rolls his eyes as Jared is finally, mercifully, encouraged to leave the dancers alone. "How you holding up?" Chris asks, as Jared heads straight for the bar.
"Pretty good. Don't ask me that tomorrow, 'cause I'll probably be an absolute wreck."
"Fair enough. I just wondered, since you looked kind of serious a few minutes ago. Both of you."
"Yeah, well. I kind of told Jared about my big gay family fantasy. You know. Me, him, the dog, and two-point-four kids, happily ever after. I don't think he's grown up enough to know if he wants that yet. Or maybe he's too grown up."
"You can always borrow Johnny for a week. I'm sure me and Lynn could cope with the time off, knowing he was in safe hands."
Jensen sighs. "Not really what I meant, Chris."
"I know. Just trying to be helpful."
"I appreciate it." Jensen hugs Chris tightly then. "I'm really gonna miss you."
"Hey, hey! Save it for tomorrow, jerk. I'm not going to embarrass myself at such an excellent party. I'll do it at the airport, where nobody knows me."
"Your beers, gentlemen." Jared's there suddenly, handing them both a bottle, and he slings his arm around Jensen's shoulder. "Those dancing boys are hot."
"It's not gonna work tonight, Jay," Jensen tells him. "Give it up." Jared huffs, but stays quiet. On stage, the boys are all lined up in a row, grinding against one another and waving their boas above their heads. Jensen's not watching them any more, though. His gaze is fixed on Jared, his hand pressed to naked tattooed skin. "Jay?"
"Yeah?" Jared's distracted. He is still watching the stage, and so is Chris.
Jensen pats the skin under his hand and moves out of Jared's hold. "Nothing. I love you."
"Love you too." His gaze finally moves to Jensen. "You going somewhere?"
"Yeah. But I'll be back real soon. Keep Chris company." He leans in and kisses the other man real quick, then heads away. He really does need some air now, and he needs some quiet too.
He thinks Stevie might be offended if she sees him leaving, so he walks all the way to the back wall of the bar and follows it around to the front door, opening it just enough to slip through. He now realizes how stale the air inside the bar really is. He takes a deep breath of the fresh air outside and sighs. The parking lot is pretty damn full, but most of the spaces have motorcycles parked in them, two at a time, so Jensen has plenty of room to sit down on the cement curbs that mark out the spaces. He settles down on one of the markers, his knees curled into his chest, tattooed arms wrapped around them.
Looking out at the traffic, Jensen loses himself in thought, until he hears a set of boot heels shuffling on the parking lot pavement. Turning and looking up, Jensen expects to see Jared or Chris, but instead finds Jeffrey standing there.
"You okay, kid?"
Jensen smiles and nods. "Yeah," he agrees. "Just needed some fresh air. The kids at the babysitters?"
Grunting, Jeff moves to sit on the marker with Jensen. "Yeah," he agrees, swearing at his knees. They don't bend like they used to and he suddenly feels old. "They were tuckered out. Went right to bed."
"Good," he nods.
Jeffrey watches as Jensen turns back toward the traffic, watching it speed by. He frowns and does the same, wishing he knew just how to make the kid feel better. "You dreading tomorrow as much as I am?"
Jensen doesn't really answer. He sort of laughs and somewhat nods, shrugging with one shoulder at the same time.
Nodding in agreement, Jeffrey adds in his own soft chuckle. "Yeah," he sighs. "I know I'm not really great with the touchy-feely girly talk, but..."
Jensen straightens enough to look over at him. "You don't have to, Jeff."
"I know," he agrees, with an earnest nod. "But I want you to know a few things."
Jensen just lets him talk. He suddenly really realizes how the move to LA isn't just affecting him and Jared.
"Before you, Jay was a tough call," he admits. "I had more headaches over that kid. I love him so fucking much. More than he'll ever know. But -- well, you know. Saying he's a handful is an understatement."
Jensen laughs softly, his eyes sparkling in the low, amber light of the parking lot.
"You were good for him, though," Jeff continues. "You got through to him when I couldn't. Because of you, he's turned out to be a pretty damn good kid."
"He was a damn good kid before that," Jensen assures him. "We just brought out the best in each other, I think."
Jeff nods, staring off into space. "He's always going to be a tough case, I think," he says. "But he loves you like...well, like crazy. He'll always need your help. He picked up some pretty shitty habits from me." He turned and motioned to the bar. "Like all of this, for instance."
Shaking his head, Jensen reaches out and sets a hand on Jeffrey's shoulder. "Jeff," he says, smiling. "I fell in love with him because of how you raised him. Because of who, and what he is. No relationship is perfect, I know that. But I think we've worked really hard to get where we are."
"You have," he agrees. "I've never seen so much ambition in that kid's eyes as I do now. I don't know where any of us would be without you."
His smile is crooked, his eyes welling up with tears. "Well, the feeling's mutual."
Jeff reaches out, his fingers curling around the back of Jensen's neck, pulling him in for an embrace. He feels the young man's arm around his shoulders, holding on tightly. "Gonna miss you, kid," he says softly into Jensen's ear.
"I'm gonna miss you too," Jensen whispers.
"You're not making out with my significant other, are you, Jeffrey Dean?"
Jeff and Jensen let go of each other, looking up to see Jared nearing them. Laughing, Jeffrey holds out his hands to his son, silently asking for assistance.
"Old fart," Jared laughs. "Can't get up on your own, can you?"
"Just fucking help me, asshole," Jeff smiles.
Jared takes hold of both of Jeff's hands and tugs hard, pulling him up from the lot marker. He's still smiling when Jeff lets go of his hands, instead reaching up and patting Jared's face. Without a word, Jeff pulls Jared in for a hug, and then is gone in an instant, as if he has already used up his words and can't find any more to bestow upon Jared.
Smile gone, Jared watches Jeff head back towards the bar, his shoulders hunched as he walks. Jared winces and sits down next to Jensen. "Did it just get really frickin' serious out here, or what?"
Jensen grumbles and leans against Jared's warm body. "This is torture, you know," he complains.
"The party?"
"Yes," he agrees adamantly. "It's drawing it all out. I just want to get it over with."
Even though he understands what Jensen's saying, he can't resist teasing him a little. "Just like one big band aid. Rip it off and get all the hurt done at once?"
"Yes," he agrees, then heaves a heavy sigh. "Can we go home?"
Tonguing his teeth, Jared thinks for a moment. "This is really bothering you?"
He doesn't reply with words, just nodding his head.
Jared returns the nod. "Okay," he agrees. "Let me go tell Jeff, and we'll head home."
Hope sparkles in Jensen's greenish eyes as he watches Jared stand. "Really?"
"Yeah," he shrugs. "It'd be better if they weren't around when we have our last bout of mind-blowing leaving-Texas sex."
Instantly, Jensen's sadness fades and he gets up, smiles at Jared. "I love you," he chuckles.
It's going to hurt to leave the family, but Jensen knows that, with Jared by his side, they can conquer pretty much anything. Jeffrey was right. They've been good for each other and Jensen doesn't see that stopping any time soon.
Jared pulls Jensen in with an arm around his waist and kisses him quickly. "I love you too. Five minutes, okay? We can do the proper goodbyes tomorrow."
"Okay." Jensen nods and watches him go. He knows it'll be okay, but tomorrow doesn't seem far away enough.
end
Okay.
Here's some news.
COMING MARCH 2010
:D