David Letterman's Top 10
Letterman's Top Ten from last night [ source ]
Top ten things I, Peter Griffin, would like to say to America.
1. "We should all buy more American-made products which at last check are down to porn and cheeseburgers."
2. "If Jay Leno makes you laugh, chances are I don't care for you as a person."
3. "I have always wanted to do this...ladies and gentlemen, the Max Weinberg Seven."
4. "Hey Ben Affleck and Matt Damon we're all still waiting on that second Oscar-winning script."
5. "Did you know Jim Belushi had a brother who was in TV, too?"
6. "This is the best moment in television since Mr. Belvedere sat on his own nuts and fainted."
7. "Laura Bush killed a guy."
8. "Shouldn't Crystal Bernard be in 'Playboy' by now... I mean we did our part and sat through seven seasons of 'Wings'."
9. "Did the Patriot Act take care of Mujibur and Sirajul?"
10. "If George Bush had Dick Cheney's first name, his name would be Dick Bush and I'll tell you I'd listen to a lot more of his speeches."
Top ten things I, Peter Griffin, would like to say to America.
1. "We should all buy more American-made products which at last check are down to porn and cheeseburgers."
2. "If Jay Leno makes you laugh, chances are I don't care for you as a person."
3. "I have always wanted to do this...ladies and gentlemen, the Max Weinberg Seven."
4. "Hey Ben Affleck and Matt Damon we're all still waiting on that second Oscar-winning script."
5. "Did you know Jim Belushi had a brother who was in TV, too?"
6. "This is the best moment in television since Mr. Belvedere sat on his own nuts and fainted."
7. "Laura Bush killed a guy."
8. "Shouldn't Crystal Bernard be in 'Playboy' by now... I mean we did our part and sat through seven seasons of 'Wings'."
9. "Did the Patriot Act take care of Mujibur and Sirajul?"
10. "If George Bush had Dick Cheney's first name, his name would be Dick Bush and I'll tell you I'd listen to a lot more of his speeches."