Does she really know?
Longing to hold her to me again, I often wonder, does she really know? Does she really know how much I miss her? Does she know that every night I cry myself to sleep because I miss the feel of her snuggling into me at night? Does she know that I miss the songs I used to sing to just her? Does she get tucked in every night with the same amount of
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You are her mother. No matter how angry/hurt/whatever, she may feel now or in the future, she will always love you because you are hers. She is old enough to remember you, so that is a fact you can trust in. If this had happened when she was a tiny infant, it might be different, but it didnt.
I know it seems like there is no way for things to get better, and that it is hurting you every moment you aren't with her. I wish I could do more to help you. But know this. No matter how much we convince ourselves we hate our parents, or how angry we get, in the end we still love them, because they love us unconditionally. She will always love you, my dear. Whether she expresses it now or not.
*hugs you again*
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I will also tell you from someone who has gone through this ie giving up her child that yes it WILL get better, not easier it never gets easier but it will get better.
I gave mine up when she was an infant, did not know me, and now here she is back in my life and she tells me she loves me.
I KNOW that you are going through a really rough time but I want you to know that at some point she will be back in your arms and you have the advantage that she does know you and she did and does love you.
Hugs hun.
Love you and always here if you need me.
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