hello. i have lost the will to live, and I trust nothing right now If you would like to call me 817-424-1420 but beware that i will probably say some pretty disturbing things and for god sakes do not call for your own amusement. sit and listen and see if you feel moved to call.

I wish Brown would smile for at least some of all the pictures that are being taken of him. He just looks so sad. :( Can someone get this boy a pony?

About a week ago Christopher asked me if I had heard
"that latest Blackeyed Peas song?"
I was like no and he said nothing and so that was that.
I heard it today. and life is ridiculous and lovely and I am so HAPPY to be a part of it.

Trivia, kinda. Do you know where this is from ( Read more... )

There's A Hole In My Sidewalk Autobiography in Five Short Chapters ( Read more... )

I messed up yesterday. It started at 4pm and didn't end until 12am. Messing up while in recovery is intense, because you know what you are doing, and you just don't get relief like you used to ,,,so you go immediately to the frantic extreme. The experience was painful,,, and needed. I learned some disturbing things about myself, no wonder I am ( Read more... )

I wrote this in my new journal ( Read more... )

If you are reading this and you did not get an email from me today, it means either I don't have you or I got you wrong. Please leave your email address in a comment. lovelovelove

Living intensely forces you to mature quickly and tremendously. I am well today.

They promise a mustard seed of hope is enough for God but that is not proving so. For hours I have begged on my knees for connection. I've been willing to go to any lengths to get recovery. but the disease/Devil tells me that I am too far gone. That God and Love is too far away ( Read more... )