While I'm actually sober for a few days and it's not that bad yet. I've been feeling alright most of the time and now i just get mad instead of depressed so I'm better off there. I nearly cut my pinky in half today at work, other than that my day was boring and now here's a survey

Well it's been awhile and alot has changed since i last wrote in here. For one thing I don't blame myself for what happened, it was the other persons fault. The mistake I made was trusting that person and believing in them. I can't beat myself up over that forever, but knowing that makes this alot easier ( Read more... )

Ugh what the hell. Why do I have to do this to myself. In the beginning I knew things would happen like this if i let myself feel for someone, but I did anyways cause I actually thought it would work, and I've just reminded myself why I'm always pessimistic. As soon as I get my hopes up they're crushed down ( Read more... )

I really don't get girls. I really don't get her. For the first time in my life she makes me feel like I actually matter, that I'm something special. Then she spends the next month making feel like I'm absolutly nothing, and rather than do anything to prove me wrong, you just make the feelings worse and worse till I'm sure than true. Then she flips ( Read more... )

You know what I'm done talking about how I feel, you wanna know how I feel? I hate myself, I always have and I always will, and I'm sick of hoping something good will happen to me cause it won't. So fuck all this reforming myself bullshit that's not gonna happen anymore, and fuck sharing my feelings in this stupid online journal

So yea things are still fucked up even worse now than before. For the past two or three weeks I've just been getting drunk alot to try and forget my problems, but instead it just made things even worse, and led me to do something really fucking stupid. I can't blame doing it on the alcohol, cause either way it was my decision, the alcohol didn't ( Read more... )

So yea today was a shitty day, and has usual i'm confused as hell about alot of things. ( this isn't about you, though i am confused last I knew we were fine and I hope it's still that way ( Read more... )

I just don't get it I really don't. I have no idea what to do. You say your not over me and you still like me, but I'm not stupid I can tell I'm the second choice, you don't reply to my messages, your livejournal is all about him. Don't say it doesn't mean anything, I've been reading it for awhile and I know you write about what matters to you, the ( Read more... )

Ha ha so I guess since all my friends are back to school with a few exceptions I'm gonna have alot more freetime to write in this. I can tell my audience of 3 people are cheering already ( Read more... )

Well it's been a hell of long time since i've wrote in this thing. Mostly cause not many read it and I usually don't feel like spilling my guts. Today i guess things are different. I got a lot on my mind ( Read more... )