Another post that's going to begin with 'I haven't posted in awhile'. Empty promises of 'I'm going to post more often, I swear, omg' tend to fall on empty ears, so we'll skip that step. I'm going to rant awhile. I apologize to the friends list. Maybe I should set up a cut. Read if you like. It's a lot of recounting the last few months from my view.
Last I posted was around Otaku Omaha, I do believe. Stepping away from that, I've met more friends, travelled to several more cons, met even more friends, had a summer that doesn't feel as adventurous and the usual crazy projects that I end up a part of didn't feel quite as exciting as they have in the past.
But the fall breeze awakens the sleeping dreamer. Having the windows open and the breeze flowing in reminds me of what it's like to be alive.
Hmm...where to begin. Well, I moved into a new place with Nick Dinges, over on 13th and A in Lincoln here. It's been...pleasant. Not to trash Zach (you're my buddy, Zach, if you still check LJ ;P ) Nick's been a really cool guy. Easy to get along with, we don't step on each other toes (At least, I hope he doesn't think I do) We live pretty easily, in a bare necessities kind of way. Things continue to grow around here....evolving into a little more 'lived in' place. The neighborhood leaves something to be desired, of course, but once adjusted to, isn't bad at all.
Insert con crazy the last three months. OSFest (a sci fi con in Omaha, you guys rock), AnimeIowa, NandesuKan in Denver, SogenCon in South Dakota just this last weekend, and next week is Nuke Con in Omaha. I feel kind of stretched thin in that regard. Add to that the Awesome Rangers filming over the summer where for a good while it felt like something was going wrong every week, be it acts of God, or just general forgetfulness, or scheduling conflicts....you get the idea. I'm hoping that we will eventually conquer and our time will have one hell of a return. I know people are looking forward to it (The idea of that frightens me a little) so there is some expectation there. That's right; SogenCon attendees know about Awesome Rangers. God damn it.
This year of cons has felt very...strange. AnimeIowa and Sogencon in ways felt like a void, but I'm not sure why. Naka-Kon by far was my favorite con to go to. I met so many people there and felt like I truly connected with people. Otaku Omaha was the dream realized in a strange way, reaching across con borders, competition, breaking through the standoffishness to remember, yes, in both of our dear organizations are people who truly care about the experience, about the con-goers, about all of this silliness. I'm sure someone's going to read this, as it seems he does that. I don't care. I'll take the 'This is my blog' stance and enjoy it for once.
We have SUCH opportunity to make everything great. Abandon ego, let's fucking do it. I want the anime scene here in the Midwest to be something strong and palpable. I want every con to be something new, refreshing, exciting. I want people to realize that the connections we make, THAT'S the important part in this strange strange world we've created. And I do mean created. Even if you're just checking out the scene, you impact it. Quantum physics and such talks about how the act of observing impacts the observed, regardless of awareness. We touch everything.
Ahem. Off of the soapbox, Dylan. I do that enough.
Nandesukan reminded me of times where I wasn't proud of who I was, and I am going to walk away from that. There's my stance on that, and I'm sticking with it.
I haven't been as on top of things as I have been in the past. This year I'm pretty sure I'm feeling the effects of convention burnout. I'm not as enthusiastic about our own con as I have been in the past, and I'm hoping that's not going to show in the programming. Well, okay, I'm pretty confident that we're going to rock the midwest like I feel like we have in the past. If the last week is any indication, people are excited about us. My Activities account is getting pretty solidly hit with e-mails and questions and suggestions, and people I've talked to, even out there in Denver, know us. I've seen a lot of our shirts out there. Let me tell you guys, that is a beautiful sight, that people would wear their shirts from a little convention in Lincoln that could. Every time I see that I wanna dance and sing, so I guess I'm not totally burned out and jaded.
If I worked my time a little more efficiently, I would be able to do so much more. I get home and I just shut down some days and I don't know where to pick up again, where to start with stuff I need to do. I wanted to write some more over the summer and it didn't feel like I had the time. I still want to start writing. These guys around here are starting filming projects and all that, and I wonder if I'd have anything meaningful to contribute. Part of it involves a fear that all my ideas are stupid, so I restrain them in the back of my head and don't talk about them. I really just need to be brave and write them down. I don't know.
I'm trying to muster up the energy to carry me through the next two months, to rock out the convention and make my side of things as awesome as I can for the attendees. I want people to come and feel instantly at home, like the world's exciting again. It's kind of hard these days with what feels like the world's falling apart, the economy dying, politics going fucking nuts with mudslinging and all that.
Thankfully I'm not making the effort alone. Ben and Vanessa and Chris and Nick and the rest of the people on my committee are made of win and awesome. I especially want to point out Vanessa, because she is just planning on having no life for the convention. I think she's clocking in more than Tony or Lathan might ever do. She's freaking awesome, and everyone needs to recognize. Yo.
...I forgot how nice it was to write in here....I always felt better after just letting my thoughts out. Self-induced therapy rocks.
So I'll try to write in here more often. After the convention, I'm going to set up a seperate LJ for random stories and fiction and roleplaying stories. If I want to do something a little more productive in that area, it's going to take lots of practice and discipline, so the plan will be to write something in that every week.
When I have time. And thankfully, time it something had in abundance.
--- For All The Dreamers