insomnia returns

[aseariel]

not sure i should post this, but maybe it'll help

Comments

Yikes

[cynicallynaive]

Wow, i had no idea you were dealing with all this. *big hugs* I'll be praying for emotional healing -- your reaction to this trauma is very natural but God can heal these things....

Re: Yikes

[aseariel]

i don't really think about it much, and probably wouldn't have done so now, except for the dream i had that he was here at my college O_< it brought back unpleasant memories, to say the least.

thanks for your prayers.

[lunacy769]

Wow, thats not cool. I will pray for you, and I know that you will over come this. *hugs*

[aseariel]

thanks *hugs* ;_;

[soan]

::hugs tightly:: I don't know what else to say besides that honestly... I do understand what emotional scars can leave though.

[aseariel]

sometimes that's all you can say. and sometimes it's enough. *hugs back*

[suaiden]

The mockery of the things we call love. Why is love always confused with abuse?

I'm sorry, and I'm even sorrier you aren't sleeping. If I were in America, well, I dunno, I'd give you some hot chocolate or something.

Even failed attempts destroy something inside.

Sorrowing.

[aseariel]

Even failed attempts destroy something inside.
and therein lies the problem, i'm afraid.

thank you for your kindness to me.

[suaiden]

Don't worry. That's why I am writing these essays.

We all have something a little destroyed inside, yute. You'll get through this. We all will. :)

[revdrsyn]

Lauren, I had no idea. I knew something haunted you, but I seriously thought it was the price you paid for your brilliant imagination. I'm sorry. I know that fear. I've seen it in the eyes of a lot of very close women friends, and sometimes in the mirror.

That isn't love. You know that, right? He may have been truly repentent, but more than likely, he said that because you got away. That kind of assault and abuse is about power, not love, not even sex.

I wish I had a spare car, and I'd be there tomorrow morning to buy you some sushi.

::BIG HUG TO YOU::

Sends eteddy bear and erose.

[aseariel]

i do know that he didn't love me. i think you have to be taught how to love, or at least learn, and he never did. he was an alcoholic at 18... with his parents' knowledge (they figured if they kept him supplied, he wouldn't sneak out and drive while drunk or somesuch. he explained it to me once, but i don't really remember).

it's been gone for a long time. and then one dream, and it's back. i pity him; i really do. alcoholism was one of the least of his problems. but i don't want to be in the same state with him for the rest of my life, if i can help it.

i told a close friend of mine here, so i think she'll be looking out for me the next few days. in a week, i should be in florida with the girl i'm rooming with next year and some other gal friends.

gah. between this and finding a sketch i drew related to my brother, this exam week is gonna suck. >_O

[revdrsyn]

Where in Florida?

[aseariel]

near orlando? maybe?! O_o i don't actually know.